Movies That Were Probably Made By a Spasm of Six Year-Olds on Acid: The Top 75 Action Films Poll Results Thread

http://somewhatmanlynerd.com/gifs/letoffsomesteambennett.gif

if ive learned anything from this poll, its that i have to see 'commando' again. its been too long!

oh, I've totally seen this shopping mall scene before! Love this stewardess girl.

steel drums and saxophones. you can't beat this.

rae daw chong is absolutely my favorite in this.

Matrix: [Comes out from hidden place] Come on Bennett, throw away the chicken shit gun, you don't just want to pull the trigger, you want to put the knife in me, and look me in the eye, and see what's going on in there when you turn it, that's what you want to do, right?

Such a weird fight.

with a chicken shit gun, yeah i'd imagine.

Hard Target features Van Damme punching out a rattlesnake. The "best" Van Damme is, of course, Time Cop, though Double Impact had the best tagline ("double the Van Damage!"). However, "Double Team" (Rodman! Rourke!) may be the most batshit insane ridiculous of the bunch, with Van Damme teaming up with Tsui Hark. Hark also directed "Knock Off," which is similarly surreal-nuts, but "Double Team" ... man.

how do ppl here feel about 'jcvd'

"spasm of six-year-olds" is a great collective noun

<3 these dudes: http://www.ruthlessreviews.com/1413/commando/

wait, has a JCVD movie made the list yet?

if no JCVD movie does, then... I just don't know.

chicken shit gun

manure cannon?

xp Street Fighter for #1

how do ppl here feel about 'jcvd'

― desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, February 17, 2012 7:45 AM (9 minutes ago) Bookmark

its really good

http://img638.imageshack.us/img638/9296/commandoarnieactionfigu.jpg

^ had this when I was a kid!

xp re jcvd: i've only seen that one clip that was making the youtube rounds for a while, it totally sounds like the kind of movie i'd be into but at the same time i've seen like ten minutes of all other van damme movies ever so the idea of watching it makes me feel sort of like a pseud

also, there's the curious fact that Die Hard was originally envisioned as a Commando sequel:

John McTiernan was originally going to make Commando 2, but Arnold Schwarzenegger turned the role offer down. Commando 2 was transformed into this film; Schwarzenegger was the first actor offered the title role, but he again declined. Eventually Bruce Willis would get the part after it had been offered to Sylvester Stallone, Burt Reynolds, Harrison Ford, Mel Gibson and Richard Gere.

Predator and Commando man not making the top 10... I guess I just don't get you guys. Top 5 should be Pred, Commando, T1, T2 and Die Hard.

the thought of anybody in that list as McLane tells you why Willis is an all-time great tbh

xp re jcvd: i've only seen that one clip that was making the youtube rounds for a while, it totally sounds like the kind of movie i'd be into but at the same time i've seen like ten minutes of all other van damme movies ever so the idea of watching it makes me feel sort of like a pseud

― desperado, rough rider (thomp), Friday, February 17, 2012 8:02 AM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark

the more into you van damme the better it probably is, but i think as long as you know who he is you can prob appreciate it

Die Hard will win and bollocks to any SF movie being top 5 unless Verhoeven directed it

i think gibson probably could've been a good mclane

cd've been dece yeah but too close to the Lethal Weapon persona?

yeah i was just thinking that.

also not bald enough

also wd have punched his wife in the face at the end of the film

the thought of richard gere as john mcclaine is blowing my mind here

Recall, the idea of Bruce Willis as John McClaine was nuts at the time, too.

Wait, how can Die Hard have been conceived as a sequel to Commando when it's based on a book?

Funny, the book Die Hard is based on is a sequel itself!

In 1975, author Roderick Thorp saw the film The Towering Inferno. After seeing the film, Thorp had a dream of seeing a man being chased through a building by men with guns. He woke up and took that idea and turned it into the The Detective sequel, Nothing Lasts Forever.

You can pretty much add "chased by men with guns" to any movie description to make it awesome. Except Inception, which made it boring. Go figure.

xp Bit of retconning, bish bosh, job's a good 'un. Cf. Pirates of the Caribbean: on Stranger Tides. I guess.

"a dream of seeing a man being chased through a building by men with guns"!!!!

xxp Hey, the character from the novel was originally played by Frank Sinatra in The Detective, so.

Amusingly, Die Hard 2 is ALSO based on a novel written by an entirely different person and having nothing to do with Die Hard OR Roderick Thorp's book. Hollywood is amazing.

"dream of seeing a man chased around an airport by men with guns"

BTW if you haven't read Nothing Lasts Forever, do so. Except for the bad guys having a more 70s motivation, and the central relationship being estranged father/daughter rather than estranged husband/wife, pretty much every plot point and action sequence is right there on the page.

Ah, here we go:

The screenplay was written by Steven E. de Souza and Doug Richardson, adapted from the novel 58 Minutes by Walter Wager. The novel has the same premise but differs slightly: A cop must stop terrorists who take an airport hostage while his wife's plane circles overhead. He has 58 minutes to do so before the plane crashes. Roderick Thorp, who wrote the novel Nothing Lasts Forever, upon which the first Die Hard film was based, receives credit for creating "certain original characters", although his name is misspelled onscreen as "Roderick Thorpe."

Anyone read the Bourne books? How much of them get ported over directly?

very little, it was discussed briefly upthread?

BTW, it does bear further emphasis that Bruce Willis' casting in Die Hard was one of Hollywood's all-time huge WTF moves. Hard to believe, in retrospect. He was just an affable romantic lead TV actor, as far as anyone was concerned.

Yeh, along with Woody Harrelson going from "Cheers" to "Natural Born Killers"

iirc die hard with a vengeance was supposed to be a lethal weapon movie

Somehow I'd managed to avoid Akira all these years, despite being well aware of it since its release. Well, honestly, it wasn't that hard to avoid. Anyway, watched it last night. Pretty cool, I guess, pretty much exactly what I expected. I guess I'm just not a fan of anime style, though as a kid I do recall sitting rapt watching "StarBlazers."

The most I was ever enveloped in Anime was the Voltron cartoon series that came on in the mid 80s, which may actually be a different type of animation than proper "anime" (I dunno).

Die Hard was Bruce's second film role, right? He did some date movie first and then WHAMMO he became the biggest action star in the world for a couple years.

Blind Date? With Basinger? Was that pre Die Hard?

wanna see the alternate-universe die hard with burt reynolds

Yeah, I guess that was Blind Date, the year before, which flopped hard with a vengeance.

xp or with Sinatra as a sequel to The Detective

TS: Die Hard with Burt Reynolds vs. Raiders with Tom Selleck.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSyHSgEbNng&feature=player_embedded#!