Movies That Were Probably Made By a Spasm of Six Year-Olds on Acid: The Top 75 Action Films Poll Results Thread

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Dead Ringers?

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:24 (twelve years ago) link

Well, his characters transform but...oh, why am I even defending this.

windborne grey frogs (dowd), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:25 (twelve years ago) link

Sorry. btw, I do genuinely love body-swap comedies. Here's IMDB's list http://www.imdb.com/keyword/body-swap/?title_type=feature

windborne grey frogs (dowd), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:27 (twelve years ago) link

The best body-swap movies were all made before 1942 (/Morbs)

Josh in Chicago, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:28 (twelve years ago) link

Yeah LOL Lost Highway

A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:30 (twelve years ago) link

how did these polls work? how many films was one supposed to list???

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:30 (twelve years ago) link

we were asked to submit a ballot of 50 films, assigning 50 points to the film we liked the most and 1 point to the film we liked the least of those

films were then ranked based on how many points they got out of all ballots

⚓ (gr8080), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 00:34 (twelve years ago) link

we were asked to submit a ballot of 50 films, assigning 50 points to the film we liked the most and 1 point to the film we liked the least of those

so wait basically our top film gets 50 pts, 2nd gets 49, etc.?

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:24 (twelve years ago) link

amateurist, if you had voted, how would the results have changed?

flagp∞st (dayo), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:35 (twelve years ago) link

OK I didn't vote in this because I wasn't following ILX when the ballots were due. But here are some of my favorite action movies, in roughly descending order, more or less OTOH. I limited myself to one film per director. Left off some films that I don't really consider "action movies": A History of Violence, Blade Runner… Also, I barely even thought about European action cinema (which I know only a little), and probably didn't include enough Japanese films…. Etc. etc.

1. The Blade (Tsui)
2. Once upon a Time in the West (Leone)
3. Objective, Burma! (Walsh)
4. Police Story (Chan)
5. Heat (Mann)
6. Boiling Point (Kitano)
7. Die Hard (McTiernan)
8. The New One-Armed Swordsman (Cheh)
9. The Wild Bunch (Peckinpah)
10. RoboCop (Verhoeven)

11. Scarface (Hawks)
12. The Road Warrior (Miller)
13. A Better Tomorrow (Woo)
14. Play Dirty (DeToth)
15. A Touch of Zen (Hu)
16. Assault on Precinct 13 (Carpenter)
17. Seven Samurai (Kurosawa)
18. The Longest Nite (To)
19. The Driver (Hill)
20. Jaws (Spielberg)

21. Legendary Weapons of China (Law)
22. Dirty Harry (Siegel)
23. Snake in the Eagle's Shadow (Yuen)
24. Ulzana's Raid (Aldrich)
25. On Dangerous Ground (Ray)
26. Children of Men (Cuarón)
27. Crazy Thunder Road (Ishii)
28. Across 110th Street (Shear)
29. Sorcerer (Friedkin)
30. Graveyard of Honor (Fukasaku)

31. Forty Guns (Fuller)
32. Ronin (Frankenheimer)
33. Zulu (Endfield)
34. Killer Constable (Kwei)
36. City on Fire (Lam)
37. Blueprint for Murder (Okamoto)
38. Navajo Joe (Corbucci)
39. Yes, Madam! (Yuen)
40. The Limey (Soderbergh)

41. Task Force (Leung)
42. Dark of the Sun (Cardiff)
43. The Great Duel (Kudo)
44. Get Carter (Hodges)
45. Rolling Thunder (Flynn)
46. Rock 'n' Roll Cop (Wong)
47. The Four Feathers (Korda)
48. Darker Than Amber (Clouse)
49. I Spit on Your Grave (Zarchi)
50. Tetsuo: The Iron Man (Tsukamoto)

Special prize: L'Argent (Bresson)

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:36 (twelve years ago) link

i wasn't sure whether to put T2 on since i haven't seen it in 20 years.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:39 (twelve years ago) link

actually maybe THE BIRDS should be on there

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:40 (twelve years ago) link

oh well

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:40 (twelve years ago) link

adding 45 points to HEAT'S tally would not have placed it ahead of CoM

flagp∞st (dayo), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:41 (twelve years ago) link

actually maybe INGLOURIOUS BASTERDS too

do overs

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:42 (twelve years ago) link

Con Air - 50
Die Hard - 49
Dirty Harry - 48
Kill Bill Volume 1 - 47
Master of the Flying Guillotine (One-Armed Boxer 2) - 46
Midnight Run - 45
Hard Target - 44
Starship Troopers - 43
Ong-Bak - 42
Robocop - 41
For a Few Dollars More - 40
Under Siege - 39
Magnum Force - 38
Die Hard with a Vengeance - 37
Sonatine - 36
One-Armed Boxer - 35
Conan the Barbarian - 34
Aliens - 33
Die Hard 2 - 32
Hard to Kill - 31
Machete - 30
North by Northwest - 29
The Terminator - 28
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly - 27
Leon: The Professional - 26
Rush Hour - 25
Lethal Weapon - 24
Hard Boiled - 23
The Bourne Identity - 22
Mad Max - 21
Enter the Dragon - 20
From Russia with Love - 19
Running Scared (1986) - 18
The Enforcer - 17
The French Connection - 16
The Hidden - 15
Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan - 14
You Only Live Twice - 13
The Seven Samurai - 12
The Dirty Dozen - 11
Death Wish 3 - 10
The Getaway - 9
Lone Wolf & Cub: Baby Cart at the River Styx - 8
Dead Heat - 7
Get Carter - 6
Strike Commando 2 - 5
The Running Man - 4
Death Race 2000 - 3
Red Sun - 2
Extreme Prejudice - 1

contreatable logorrhea (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:43 (twelve years ago) link

50 the killer
49 independence day
48 starship troopers
47 hard boiled
46 aliens
45 the fifth element
44 terminator 2
43 children of men
42 hero
41 minority report
40 return of the jedi
39 the matrix
38 robocop
37 top gun
36 GI Joe: The Movie (animated)
35 the fast and the furious: tokyo drift
34 election (johnnie to)
33 a better tomorrow
32 Akira
31 le samourai
30 miami vice
29 for a few dollars more
28 mission: impossible
27 demolition man
26 three kings
25 total recall
24 the bournes (8 points each, maybe?)
23 Commando
22 under siege
21 crouching tiger hidden dragon
20 ronin
19 street fighter (animated)
18 infernal affairs
17 face/off
16 ghost in the shell
15 appleseed (2004)
14 thomas crown affair
13 goldeneye
12 Kill Bill Volume 1 (Tarantino, 2003)
11 to live and die in l.a.
10 the untouchables
9 steamboy (2004)
8 terminator
7 city hunter
6 north by northwest
5 Die Hard
4 the good, the bad and the ugly
3 War of the Worlds
2 Speed
1 d-war

flagp∞st (dayo), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:47 (twelve years ago) link

sick list amt, givin me some viewin ideas

RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:48 (twelve years ago) link

Just saw a preview for a tv show where Ashley Judd plays Liam Neeson's character from Taken. I expect it to be amazing/terrible.

Kiarostami bag (milo z), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:49 (twelve years ago) link

<3 her but that sounds awful

wolf kabob (ENBB), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 01:55 (twelve years ago) link

some youtubez for some of the less well-known films on my list:

killer constable
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9Kz7aixrFI
(check out those swords!)

boiling point
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMow8XsAVt4
best. trailer. ever. that's a well-known film critic getting his ass shot at :55 btw. i love this movie so much. not for all tastes.

crazy thunder road
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Edkgd45wtkA
high water mark of japanese biker-punk cinema.

task force
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDMw66ChElI
cantopop cheesiness + explosions + swordfighting + people diving w/ guns in slo-mo + romance

longest nite
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0Zbr3970Dg
this is from johnnie to's late-1990s period that culminated w/ the mission (the film that helped introduce him to festival-type audiences rather than just HK genre-film fans). he was on fire around this time (see also: lifeline, hero never dies, running out of time).

navajo joe
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGcK_qyL9Ug
burt reynolds without a moustache! an ennio morricone score that prominently features people literally screaming! lots of zooms! i rest my case. django is pretty good too.

the great duel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lLYsXkZHlwI
check that shit out.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:13 (twelve years ago) link

OK.. major LOLs: when you watch the demonstration video for facebook's timeline feature, it begins with the opening bars of the main theme from "assault on precinct 13."

i shit y'all not.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:26 (twelve years ago) link

ulzana's raid
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXw4qsJjR9k
this movie is fucking brutal.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:40 (twelve years ago) link

warning: that scene is kind of disturbing.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:40 (twelve years ago) link

speaking of disturbing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uROMTzJsfOI

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:43 (twelve years ago) link

def some good films on your list amst, gonne see if i can track those on your list that i haven't seen. also, kind of surprised that i've seen all but one of the movies that placed in the top 75 (branded to kill).

Jibe, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 02:56 (twelve years ago) link

ulzana's raid is a vicious flick

omar little, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:05 (twelve years ago) link

aaaaand not a fucking "action film."

Terminator 2's "I am keeler robot who awnly shewts to vound" makes it the ideal Obamafan action crapper.

Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:08 (twelve years ago) link

there it is

⚓ (gr8080), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:10 (twelve years ago) link

literal stfus

catbus otm (gbx), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:11 (twelve years ago) link

itt Arnold Schwarzenegger talks like Zsa Zsa Gabor

A Full Torgo Apparition (Phil D.), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:12 (twelve years ago) link

sick list amt, givin me some viewin ideas

― RudolfHitlerFtw (Hungry4Ass), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 7:48 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i'd say this is otm, and could be extended to thread in general

catbus otm (gbx), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:12 (twelve years ago) link

Ahnold "I vant to be alone" Schwarnegger

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:14 (twelve years ago) link

oh typing, why did you leave me

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:15 (twelve years ago) link

I do hope you've volunteered all your spare time to the station for the next 12 days, Morbs, because this thread was actually fun today without you flinging feces everywhere.

Steamtable Willie (WmC), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:17 (twelve years ago) link

cool

Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:20 (twelve years ago) link

http://i.imgur.com/cxTBi.gif

l-r: dude thinkin baout die hard, morbsy

catbus otm (gbx), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:21 (twelve years ago) link

So I didn't follow any of this as it came out and I totally forgot to vote, aka figured I didn't know enough of the action canon to really make a competent ballot. But BRAVO to omar, this is a great list and an even-better to-do list. I haven't seen the overwhelming majority of this list. Think I'm going to start with Big Trouble in Little China.

Also, I got blurbed in a couple of the countdown entries! That makes me feel real special. ^_^ ^_^ ^_^

Doctor Casino, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:23 (twelve years ago) link

at least you guys can take comfort that I have absolutely nothing bad to say about your #1 choice.

Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:30 (twelve years ago) link

*applause*

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:33 (twelve years ago) link

....cuz yeah, never seen it, never will.

best body-swap comedy is All of Me.

Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:34 (twelve years ago) link

wait, I'm confused: that's never stopped you before Morbs.

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:37 (twelve years ago) link

:p

Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:39 (twelve years ago) link

have a good Lent and watch all of Tarkovsky!

Literal Facepalms (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:40 (twelve years ago) link

we will; we won't!

⚓ (gr8080), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:41 (twelve years ago) link

1 d-war

― flagp∞st (dayo), Tuesday, February 21, 2012 8:47 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i saw this in the theater & own it on dvd

johnny crunch, Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:42 (twelve years ago) link

it's pretty fun isn't it?

flagp∞st (dayo), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:45 (twelve years ago) link

Kinda want to see Ulzana's Raid now.

Janet Snakehole (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:45 (twelve years ago) link

ulzana's raid is a western, but like some of the other westerns on my list it has a lot -- a LOT -- of "action" and violence.

i mean obvs i could make a list of 50 great westerns and most of them would have many scenes of violence. so it's a bit arbitrary. who cares really.

flesh, the devil, and a wolf (wolf) (amateurist), Wednesday, 22 February 2012 03:47 (twelve years ago) link


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