idk, my dog clearly had separation anxiety issues!
― Bo Jackson Overdrive, Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:38 (twelve years ago) link
Quadrupeds have more sphincter power, they don't need to wipe. READ ONE BOOK!
― #1 Inspector Spacetime Fanboy (Viceroy), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:39 (twelve years ago) link
maybe if the diapers were branded as poopiecrapping re-uptake inhibitors...
― Philip Nunez, Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:39 (twelve years ago) link
sphincter power
― wolf kabob (ENBB), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:40 (twelve years ago) link
Except when they're not "regular"; that's when they're wonderful trick of "scooting" comes into play...
― #1 Inspector Spacetime Fanboy (Viceroy), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:40 (twelve years ago) link
*their wonderful trick... I think I'm a bit to excited to impart this knowledge...
Note: perfectly regular obese female dogs will scoot as the easiest way to scratch an itchy ass. Its not all about gland discharges.
― Pauper Management Improved (Sanpaku), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:45 (twelve years ago) link
how do you determine it's one and not the other?
― Philip Nunez, Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:47 (twelve years ago) link
Oh yeah that too... Its actually nicer IMO than seeing a fit dog nibble at its ass for 20 minutes.
― #1 Inspector Spacetime Fanboy (Viceroy), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:47 (twelve years ago) link
If you live in the city and don't own a home w/ a big backyard/dog run, you know what's going on with your dogs bowels...
― #1 Inspector Spacetime Fanboy (Viceroy), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:48 (twelve years ago) link
i was just imagining a dog interrogation by ice-t & belzer.
― Philip Nunez, Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:52 (twelve years ago) link
Teufel is so charming!
― Male Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Nutsack (Abbbottt), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:52 (twelve years ago) link
agreed, he looks like a dog from a N64 zelda game
― flagp∞st (dayo), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:57 (twelve years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/egxs0.png
― flagp∞st (dayo), Sunday, 26 February 2012 17:58 (twelve years ago) link
Anime dogs definitely help overcoming a revulsion to fecal bacteria.
― Pauper Management Improved (Sanpaku), Sunday, 26 February 2012 18:22 (twelve years ago) link
It helps that I don't think the N64 can render anything as small as a microorganism.
― Male Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Nutsack (Abbbottt), Sunday, 26 February 2012 18:36 (twelve years ago) link
both our cats wipe - they use special toilet paper we had made, it has a facsimile of the Constitution on every square
― unlistenable in philly (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned), Sunday, 26 February 2012 18:42 (twelve years ago) link
the Catstitution
― flagp∞st (dayo), Sunday, 26 February 2012 18:43 (twelve years ago) link
I used to be way more freaked out about dog asses but after getting a dog I sort of stopped caring. Grabbing hot poop a couple times a day through a flimsy bag sort of became natural, and having to sometimes grab a half-pooped turd and pull it the rest of the way out (with bag on my hand of course) while the dog looks up at you with a look of confusion and sadness, incapable of understanding why their ass isn't working correctly, is no longer that weird either.
― joygoat, Sunday, 26 February 2012 19:01 (twelve years ago) link
i just figured out today my cat has impacted anal glands. i thought they were dingleberries. how do i fix it without her killing me?
― kim tim jim investor (harbl), Sunday, 26 February 2012 19:39 (twelve years ago) link
I'd take her to the vet this time around because she might have an infection and it's good to have it looked at. Plus the vet can show you what to do.
― carl agatha, Sunday, 26 February 2012 19:52 (twelve years ago) link
To answer the original question, it's pretty gross so I try not to think about the fact that my cats' buttholes have been pressed against nearly every flat surface in our home, including my pillow.
― carl agatha, Sunday, 26 February 2012 19:53 (twelve years ago) link
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-Mrp1Ay3uViM/TzprXptvArI/AAAAAAAABKE/JjomyowbrLA/s280/13935_017.gif
― nate woolls, Sunday, 26 February 2012 19:54 (twelve years ago) link
Yeah. My dog literally sleeps on my pillow next to my head about 50% of the time so if I really started thinking about this I might have to give him back.
― wolf kabob (ENBB), Sunday, 26 February 2012 19:55 (twelve years ago) link
not really but, you know
Whenever one of my dogs has poop/hair problems, it's referred to as "small town butt trouble". For example, "Rudy got into some small town butt trouble when she was outside but she's ok now."I also try not to think about it; I don't have worms (yet) so I figure all is well.
― Laura Lucy Lynn (La Lechera), Sunday, 26 February 2012 20:00 (twelve years ago) link
pet poop
― flagp∞st (dayo), Monday, 27 February 2012 16:13 (twelve years ago) link
i only feed my dog the finest organic kibble and thus he poops neat little tootsie rolls, no need to wipe
the turtle is much worse, i get projectile shitted-on every time we do shell maintenance
― the late great, Monday, 27 February 2012 17:47 (twelve years ago) link
snake too, one time he wrapped himself around my wrist and used his strength to whip himself around while shitting, thus slingshot-launching his poop into my face.
― the late great, Monday, 27 February 2012 17:48 (twelve years ago) link
I had no idea that turtles were such messy shitters.
― carl agatha, Monday, 27 February 2012 19:54 (twelve years ago) link
sticking w short-haired cats, tyvm
― Little GTFO (contenderizer), Monday, 27 February 2012 19:59 (twelve years ago) link
^^^ although if we ended up with a long haired cat through some twist of fate, I wouldn't like throw it out on the street or anything. But insomuch as we get to select pets, short haired cats FTW.
― carl agatha, Monday, 27 February 2012 20:01 (twelve years ago) link
sticking can be an issue w long haired cats
― the late great, Monday, 27 February 2012 20:05 (twelve years ago) link
hee hee poopy twist of fate
― a serious minestrone rockist (remy bean), Monday, 27 February 2012 21:42 (twelve years ago) link
We are planning on shaving Lizzie's hind legs and most of her bottom due to what gets caught there. I think she'll be happier too, just hope shaving her goes well.
― JacobSanders, Monday, 27 February 2012 21:46 (twelve years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/g4wsPdA.gif
― 龜, Tuesday, 1 September 2015 12:16 (nine years ago) link
lol this really bothers you!
― Benson and the Jets (ENBB), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 13:01 (nine years ago) link
I honestly think it's grosser that we've somehow convinced ourselves that wiping is sufficient as a clean-up method.
― WHO POOPED IN MY SHOE (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 13:08 (nine years ago) link
i occasionally have to chase my longhair cat round the house to wipe errant streaks of shit from her luxuriously-upholstered, lily-white butt. she hates it, i hate it, it is the worst thing in the world (although tbf worse is her habit of daintily wiping her butt on the bannisters of our staircase if we leave her dirty and unattended for too long)
― bizarro gazzara, Tuesday, 1 September 2015 13:44 (nine years ago) link
― WHO POOPED IN MY SHOE (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 13:08 (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
oh christ a bidet bore
― Yul Brynner playing table tennis with a deviled kidney (imago), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 14:32 (nine years ago) link
A washcloth will suffice.
― Simply Sensational (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:02 (nine years ago) link
baby wipes are good too
― marcos, Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:03 (nine years ago) link
honestly i think it was some of those ass-eating threads on ILTMI and choice posts from poster a booty cleaner that inspired me to maintain a cleaner ass than regular wiping would do
― marcos, Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:04 (nine years ago) link
would never have guessed that old lunch is really terrence howard
― bizarro gazzara, Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:17 (nine years ago) link
You Gotta Wash Your Ass!
― Simply Sensational (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:19 (nine years ago) link
I am, admittedly, adopting the position of agent provocateur itt. In much the same way as I try not to think too much about the sausage I'm eating, I find that it helps not to focus on the fact that a flimsy sheet of Charmin is all that separates us from innumerable fecal encounters.
― Simply Sensational (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:23 (nine years ago) link
are you advocating mandatory colostomies
― bizarro gazzara, Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:32 (nine years ago) link
I'd just like everyone to make the best and most responsible choice in that regard.
― Simply Sensational (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 1 September 2015 15:34 (nine years ago) link