Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Please. Stop saying "What say you?" in your emails.

I could easily use 4x the RAM I do now.

no it is not 'freezing' you just aren't wearing very much, touch that dial and i will bleed you

seriously, just cover your arms, you'll feel a lot warmer.

oh fuck yes maybe try dressing for the outside not for 2 weeks in Barbados

also, while i'm on, you know why it's quiet in here? because i'm trying to do some fucking work.

(not now, obv)

don't make me quote health and safety don't make me be that guy cos i got that guy in me and you don't wanna meet that guy.

also while i'm on, i respect your right to hold whatever opinions you like about physical chastisement of children but when you work in education maybe best save that one for home hmmm?

i notice yanks didn't address my earlier question maybe they didn't hear me over the BRAYING HAWS of this mountainous amadán to my right

could be a long one

no i can't 'guess' that applicant's social security number, if i could do that i'd be a multiple lottery winner and i would never have had to meet you

lol when's yr lunch break? suggest pub

It's been two hours. Do you think he murdered someone and was taken to jail?

Also this?

no it is not 'freezing' you just aren't wearing very much, touch that dial and i will bleed you

― underleg aeroboots i have smithed (darraghmac), Friday, May 4, 2012 9:05 AM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

is my coworker with whom I share an office. Jesus H, she is tiny and always cold and the second the temp rises above 60, wears short sleeves and no jacket and even though she has worked in this office for over 7 years and knows how fucked the climate control is in the building, she will not bring a sweater to work. In fact, for years she kept a portable heating running under her desk all summer while she sat and worked in short sleeves but the electrical in our building is also fucked so she kept blowing fuses on our hall with it.

i was sent to do archiving, i think my pre-homicide facial tics are my 'tell'.

Good. I don't know how I would manage to get you a cake with a file baked into it from way over here.

Judging from the last issue and also the jpg of that guitarist thing SPIN seems to be moving towards infographics that *look* cool but are somewhat confusing to actually read, which seems to defeat the purpose of an infographic

ooops!

supervisor in meeting yesterday: "so, this search function always finds type x?"
us: "yes"
supervisor: "well will it do y?"
us: "no, only x"
supervisor: "well what about z, will it do z?"
us: "no, only x."

hi left hand, this is right hand. i have no idea what the fuck you're doing!

Not a bitch, just a little WTF:

In the parking lot, my boss mentioned casually to K3nny, the overly-helpful custodian that she'd like him get rid of the ugly fake ficus in the hallway. Later I was driving and I missed 2 calls, got 2 voice mails, and 1 text message. K3nny had called me once, then had the associate attorney call me once, and then had him text me, all to ask me which tree my boss wanted removed. DUDE, it's not an emergency! The tree isn't on fire and it's been sitting there looking ugly for 4 years!

read that as "ugly face ficus" at first.

went to get coffee with coworkers for the first time at this job. Overheard: "i worked in the apple store in washington dc and we got stuff stolen all the time. there were three teams of, shall I say, 'young urban youths' who would cycle through. youths of the same skin color, you know. i was never racist until i lived above chinatown and in washington dc. we should not love all people equally"

Hahhahhaha jesse never stop posting here pls.

xpost to O_o

Dude if that person was working at apple store in DC I can assure him he was dealing with tourists and not DCers wtf don't you pin this on us!

it was a she, not that that changes anything

I meant to do the he/she thing; brain did not assume but fingers did :(

The associate's office chair is this

http://i.imgur.com/Tjhnil.jpg

ugh I hate those goddamn things

we ended up with 2 of them in our office from some promo about 6 months ago, and two loudmouths claimed them for themselves, mostly to just remind us they were sitting on them. serioulsy, WEEKS of evangelicising abt how great they were and oh you should try it and oh they're wonderful they really are

do they sit on them now? lol, no.

The office dog popped the ball today. My boss made it happen when she gave the ball to the dog to play with. Lol. It was really cute and funny for about 60 seconds.

Read that as "dog POOPED on the ball" and I'm going to pretend that's what happened.

God damn, I got called in the office today and told I can't "do music" for office parties and other events anymore. Someone else is going to do all of the music selection for our events. I'm not "mainstream" enough. I like r & b and rap and oldies wtf. I guess they want more mainstream pop jazz and instrumentals.

The new co-ordinator did not have music classes. I DID. This was not a requirement. I am offended but...I still like my job so okay. It's like for events once or twice a month.

elevator music renditions of pachelbel's canon are the only safe choice

Yeah well it's for upbeat office events and stuff so no classical, elevator or otherwise. Like sub-WTTW "jazz" is more like it. Because it will make "everyone" happy. I'm not sure it will work but I'm not in a position to contest it, I'm not a professional "events co-ordinator" or something.

Or sub-NPR /public radio / tv or whatever.

casio keyboard "jazz" tune preset

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwFpQ2sMXTg

Anyway, I'm not totally bitching here, I mean everyone here is so nice. I just disagree strongly...perhaps it is my problem...time to sit outside and smoke and lick my wounds I guess.

i read that as "pooped" too!!

hey, don't preface things with "i didn't see this up on the site so can you add it?" it's not up there because you never sent it to me, so just send me what you want to put on the site without any of that passive aggressive bs, like why isn't it up yet.

why did you delete all the section breaks???

Ugh dont tell me to do this thing you want to do without elaborating and then say "I dunno, but can you just do it, I'm too busy" when I ask for elaboration. GAH!

Next time someone says "just do whatever" imma goatse the wiki page.

goatse with a side of rickroll.

Worst sushi combo ever.

I assume a class teacher would count as a co-worker?
I pointed out the mispelling in the word persue as this teacher yesterday was showing us how to prepare CVs, & on hers it says attention to spelling & grammar. She said it's a word, but 'just because Bill Gates doesn't recognise it.....'
I said I'd never seen it spelt like that, normally 2 Us. Then left it, thinking I might just be not seeing it right the screen it was projected on was one that I had to turn round to see and I think the lighting was odd so I wasn't 100% sure I was seeing right. Plus for some reason I thought there might just be a spelling like that, other than the common one.
A while later she handed out a printed version where i could see it better? I'd checked online dictionaries to make sure i wasn't uninformed to find each one asking me if I had the thing spelt right, or meant the near anagram peruse.
But I let it ride, then got a complex about it obviously.

oddest thing was that she had gone & looked it up online to demonstrate that it was a word, displayed the google results which did have 2 Us, as it would have. It's probably one of the main reasons I was asking myself if I'd seen it properly. But no as the handout showed persue is the 'correct spelling' & nothing to do with what rate lawyers are payed by.

Following up, I was informed that Depeche Mode "doesn't represent us". I listen to Depeche Mode as a consumer, I have Depeche posters in my cubicle and stuff - I don't use that music in events catering unless the occasion calls for alternative or dance music.

Just seems like someone upstairs has a bad temperament.

'oh, you've moved my files'

'yep. i was told to get the file room organised. moving files was an implicit part if the instruction tbh'
'but now my files aren't on my shelf'
'nope, they'll be somewhere else, alright'
'but how can i find them'
'well, we decided on a complex and intricate system known as the alphabet, motherfucker, you may have see it advertised on sesame st once or twice'

please note- i am standing beside a huge poster stating 'ALL FILES ARE NOW IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER BY NAME' and have been lugging files and answering stupid questions all fucking week. And i didn't rly give that last answer, more's the pity.

Someone from my high school whom I couldn't stand is applying for a job at my employer. More bad attitude on my part, but he was a bully in high school. Really right-wing and religious and judgmental. He may have changed but if he gets hired things will be uncomfortable.

Again, my problem, I guess. Fifty people are applying so it's a good chance he won't get hired.

Ouch, I just accidentally slammed a door on my index finger. There was blood all over the place and bejeebus it hurts! I missed a meeting and got a mini-lecture about that. Help I can barely type, my finger is somewhat numb and bandaged. How long before I quit or am fired.

I can't believe you got a mini-lecture for missing a meeting because you injured yourself. Sheesh.

I'm trying really hard not to turn into Obnoxious Workers Comp Attorney. It's hard!

One of Ytth's bosses wrote ” good rittance, jerk” on his last payslip - he was ” joking” but I think the joke is on him.