Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Does she have any annoying tics?

Not really; well, there's the aforementioned sing-song voice, and pretty much all proper nouns are spoken in Valley Girl...her demeanor is basically one giant annoying tic. Also I'm one of those people who is terrified of any kind of altercation, so I just put up with it and hope someone else eventually says something to her. :(

Food police coworkers give me the rage. I used to work at a law firm and I lost some weight and one of the secretaries became OBSESSED with what I ate for lunch every day. "What are you eating? How many calories does it have?" "Oh, what is that?" "It's yogurt." "YOGURT! Wow!"

People at work GETTING 'LOST' WRONG

Oh christ I get that shit at work anyway! "whats for lunch? what you having?" at one point I was necking some panadol and I got "whats the matter? are you sick?" NUNYA BIZNESS LADY.

i've made so many snarky responses to those sorts of questions at work that i don't get asked about any personal stuff anymore

*heaven*

The weird ass security guard at my work who sings hymns in the bathroom once asked me how much my lunched weighed. I told her six or seven pounds.

hahaha

There are only a few smokers at my job, I'm one of them. Another is this weird girl from the second floor who has no ability to read social cues whatsoever - walks up talking to me while I'm wearing headphones & playing an iPhone game, keeps talking long after our cigarettes are finished, invites herself on lunch with me, etc. Well the other day our conversation somehow got around to the name Paul, which is the name of a coworker I don't know and the name of the guy who works in the print shop, who she didn't know. Anyway the print shop one is dating another colleague and I mentioned that to her before I realized we were talking about two different guys. We quickly figured that out & I explained this. Since that day she has been talking to print shop Paul all the time - she's out the door right at 5, he's usually there waiting for our coworker/his gf, but now when the gf gets downstairs Annoying Smoker Girl is always there chatting his ear off. She asked him what he does for lunch and showed up at the same place at the same time the next day. He's taken to waiting elsewhere if he & gf have to go right at 5 because she'll hold them there for 5-10 minutes. He even changed his lunch break so she can't bomb them.

I get it, you're lonely, but fuck off!

oh god annoying coworker was impressive today... another coworker is about to leave and annoying one asks her where she is going. she replies that she's going to the gym. then annoying one tells her "oh that's a good idea, i noticed you've gained a bit of weight lately". total wtf moment, not only because how is that a problem of hers and also since other coworker is really slender and annoying one is very fat (and yeah, i know its nagl to mention stuff like that but in this case, it just makes the situation even more awkward). it took the other coworker all her self-control to not just kill annoying cw.

I do miss working in an office sometimes when I read stories like that.

XP that happened to me once but the co-worker was from another country (so not that used to british levels of over-politeness) and she was basically correct so I forgave her and it actually made me do more at the gym.

Stupid 1 and Stupid 2 decided that, instead of work, they will do a crossword puzzle today. They have two copies and are loudly discussing it across the aisle. One of the clues was "Do business", which by filling in the intersecting words they have determined to be "HAIRSALON". This is blowing their minds. Stupid 2 just said "That doesn't even make SENSE!.......unless it's 'NAILSALON'."

Like, I know these people well enough by now that it doesn't bother/surprise me that they don't see why "HAIRSALON" is right, but now I seriously need to know why "NAILSALON" makes more sense to them!

I am still back on don't mind me I'm just a smacker! tbh

Yeah smacking someone's ass here would land you in serious hot water if you had an active HR dept.

Also WHO DOES THAT.

It probably wouldn't get anyone in trouble if it went unreported. But people should know better and they should at least realize that some people might complain to HR and get them in trouble.

Though there may be accommodations for those who are legitimately affected w/ being smackers.

I don't think being a smacker is considered a disability under the ADA.

Pending litigation over whether it falls under Title VII.

lol

It was pretty unbelievable.

It reminds me of a time I was waiting at the lifts and a lady - complete stranger from another floor/company, no idea who she was - reached over to me (standing behind me) and tucked in my fukcing shirt tag. Said "I cant stand tagdags! I had to fix it!". I was gobsmacked.

Like hey ok lady, snap my bra strap or something next time why dont you?

Oh, once I was waiting on line and the woman behind me removed either a piece of hair or a thread off me because "seeing those on people is a pet peeve on mine." You know what's a pet peeve of mine? People touching me.

This was also the person who was trying to talk with me when I was listening to my iPod and knitting which I thought were fairly obvious signs that I wasn't interested in talking with anyone.

Strangers telling me my shoelace is untied makes me IA.

Oh, I guess I am getting the stupid co-workers thread and irrationally angry threads confused.

I've told you all before about the customer (when I was working at That Hardware Store) who yanked a grey hair off of my head because he thought I was too young to have grey hair.

(Not a stupid coworkers story, but related.)

if i hear "moving forward" one more time, i'm going to move my fist forward into someone's face

i could probably do better with that but i'm so, so very tired

Holy shit, Christine. That person was way the fuck out of line.

1. We have a new asst. general counsel and the general counsel is taking her around. He brought her into our office, asked if our boss was here, the AA said no, and he said, "Oh, well I'm just introducing the new asst. general counsel to all the lawyers in the legal department," and walked out. Meanwhile, me and the other lawyer in the office are just sitting here, totally disregarded, like, "I just reported all my MCLE credits so I'm pretty sure I'm still a lawyer..."

2. General counsel introduces the asst. general counsel to the boss from another office (with the same spiel about introducing her to the lawyers in the legal department, meanwhile I walk by unremarked). The Other Boss says to the new asst. general counsel, "Oh, you're replacing Fred? Well you're much prettier. Much, much prettier." To the assistant general counsel who is, among other things, responsible for defending the agency against sexual harassment lawsuits.

(For info, our department consists of suites that contain an office for the AA, an office for the boss, and the rest of the suite is two (relatively private) cubes for use non-lawyer lawyers. So while we are shielded from the horrors of an open floor plan, we don't have a door to close against noise and the two lawyers in each office are basically up in each other's business all day. But the GC was looking right at the wall of my cube with my little name plate that says "Carl Agatha, Staff Attorney" when he decided he was only introduced this woman to lawyers.)

http://planetsmilies.net/vomit-smiley-9529.gif http://planetsmilies.net/vomit-smiley-9529.gif http://planetsmilies.net/vomit-smiley-9529.gif

^^^ Jesse IRL

It reminds me of a time I was waiting at the lifts and a lady - complete stranger from another floor/company, no idea who she was - reached over to me (standing behind me) and tucked in my fukcing shirt tag. Said "I cant stand tagdags! I had to fix it!". I was gobsmacked.

This has happened to me multiple times! The worst! You should have responded "You want to know what I can't stand? The cold hands of a stranger on the back of my fucking neck. That's what I can't stand."

the other day at work, i all of a sudden sneezed, hiccuped, and did some weird snort/squawk thing, and it was very embarrassing. i just started laughing and apologized, but in my head, i was imagining my new workers coming to this thread to post about how it was SO GROSS.

In spite of all the abuse I have taken at work, I interviewed for a promotion in another department. It looks like I will get it, and I will then have the power to fire people!

From the insane co-worker files:

Today in the elevator I mentioned that I'd gone to a tattoo place near where she lived once.

her: You have a tatoo?!!!
me: Yeah, well I have four.
her: OMG you have four tattoos?
me: Yep.
her: OK tramp. Hahahahahaha just kidding! I'm sort of against them though. No ink will go on this temple.

. . .

Tramp? Really lady?!

But then . . .

ugh, i haaaaaaaaaate that

1) insult
2) jk
3) no but really, insult

I got an email from my manager (with whom I've had issues in the past couple months) telling me that she had noticed I'm doing an excellent job lately and really making an effort. I then noticed that the email was actually a forward of an email that insane co-worker had sent her letting her know that I'd been going above and beyond and really helping her and the other new team members a lot lately and that she's not the only one who noticed this but that she though the supervisor should know because it's been so helpful. It was actually exceptionally sweet.

So, she's still nuts but I think she's a really good person.

This lady she sent it to isn't really someone I work for but the HR person I'd written about before who had been harassing me about time off and stuff over the spring.

Anyway I honestly don't think I've ever met anyone who is seemingly normal yet completely clueless socially.

lady and the tramp

Did she actually say "OMG"?

Anyway I honestly don't think I've ever met anyone who is quite so seemingly normal yet completely clueless socially.

― (✿◠‿◠) (ENBB), Friday, June 22, 2012 4:27 PM (57 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

x-post - No, no she did not.

OK, good. The whole scene is bad either way, but that would have pushed it over the edge. :)

Nice work, E! lol at insult-JK-insult though, what the hell :P

"Would you put graffiti on the temple?" I heard this SO MANY times growing up re: tattoo that it's a guaranteed rolleye inducer. Anyway now I have John Mayer stuck in my head with the words "your body is a temple-land"

I'm sorry, but why do you put your ginormous box of cereal in our (often packed) communal fridge? Put that shit on your desk, or put transfer it to an airtight container and leave it in your office! Right now it's laid down flat, because its shape does not FIT in a refrigerator, and so it's taking up an unnecessary amount of surface area. And, by the way, no need to put your initials on it. No one wants to eat your stupid cereal.