Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

He couldn't grasp that he had simply not received any emails in the 20 minutes between the outage and my message.

hahahaha, I love this.

Is there any way to disable a phone's speakerphone function? My annoying coworker has always shouted into her speakerphone, but a switch flipped in me this week and I really want to kill her over this now.

I don't know if you can disable the speakerphone, but I bet it would be pretty easy to disable the speakerphone button.

I share a small office with my boss, which is attached to a slightly larger office. He is a violent Enter key striker, speakerphone offender, jargonistic abuser, and among other things, has a habit of sigh-exhaling in short whistle-shaped bursts. I've lost count of the number of times he's said "irregardless", and he plays in a 'muso' cover band (he previously referred to one of his blues-roots bands as being "like Jack Johnson before Jack Johnson"), a video of which he has played several times in the office, reliving the glory days when they took to the big stage covering 'Dark S1de of the Moon'. He's tried to impress me by kicking back in his chair while playing 'Dub Side of the Moon', and I've heard him listening to fretless bass fusion solos on his earphones. It's impossible not to cringe when he tries to relate about music (often), as we have almost nothing in common, and I've heard him enthusiastically discuss the merits of Nickelback with two colleagues (one of whom easily meets the criteria for being a stupid, annoying co-worker, and is the proud owner of every single Nickelback album - apparently there are 9? I've taken to emailing some of her declarations to my gmail e.g. "I like rock and metal - if it doesn’t feel like it’s going to break the foundations of the house with the bass, it’s not music I want to listen to"). He's fond of using terms like "going forward", "pro-active", "buy-in" and "heads-up". Him and another colleague (also a Nickelback fan) think that the Joey from Friends catchphrase "how you doin'?" is the height of hilarity, and will splice it into conversation for my benefit whenever possible. It's bleak.

kate, would you really sabotage her phone? I approve, honestly. Maybe start by very carefully putting a dab of super glue under speakerphone button or on the mic. The idea is to disable the speakerphone, but not so badly that the company will have to replace it.

Yam, it sounds bleak.

could just sabotage the speaker part... yank the wires out from behind it. all you need to do is work late and bring a screwdriver!

I've considered the superglue trick. I think I'll wait til she leaves town for a few days.

How about just saying "yo, you always use speakerphone in an open office and it is extremely distracting and disturbing others, can you keep it down?"

my boss and i share an office, suddenly. i've never found it too hot or too cold. she says she's been sick since moving to the office, a week ago. she messed around with the thermostat a lot. there are two icons on the thermostat: a flame and a snowflake. one day, she called me over and asked what they meant. i explained that the snowflake means cold air and the flame means hot air. she disagreed and explained that the reason it was so hot in there must be because i had it backwards-- the snowflake is what you choose when it's winter (it snows in winter), and the flame is what you choose in summer. after a few days with the a/c off, she compromised and decided both the flame and the snowflake should be selected.

eventually, she called a heating company and had them come to look at our cooling system. the technician confided in me that nothing was wrong but said he was going to install a new thermostat. we have a new touchscreen thermostat. the instant the new thermostat was on the wall, she exclaimed: "feels cooler in here already!"

:(

Hahaha holy fuck.

it's a nightmare.

she's been with the company for a long period of time and somehow stumbled into her position at an opportune time, i guess. although i've heard she was once competent and a colleague that worked with her for a while wondered aloud if she'd possibly had a stroke. she ran her department at a massive loss for a year or so before somebody noticed and she was transferred to work with me instead of being fired.

shortly after taking up residence in the office with me, she accidentally cc'd everyone in the company in on an email vowing to fire everyone on our team and hiring all new staff. there was some resentment. after that, she often lamented, "nobody here seems to like me."

i assured her that it's simply because she's a new face and the team will start firing on all cylinders soon.

I work in a residential facility for people with mental illness. The clients' money all comes from Social Security, and when someone new arrives we generally take them to the SS office soon afterwards, so that they can arrange to have checks sent to the main office, which takes for rent money all but a $60 monthly stipend (we provide meals, case management, etc). Recently a co-worker, who was quite nice, intelligent, reasonable, but totally shameless about not really doing much work and calling out all the time, left for another job after working here for 7 or 8 months. I inherited one of her clients, and discovered that my former co-worker had never bothered to take her to the SS office when she arrived in December, a process which takes a couple hours at most. Due to this, her benefits had been terminated, she has to re-apply, and her benefits cannot be made retroactive. So my client is out maybe $400 that were rightfully hers (and has had NO SPENDING MONEY AT ALL since December, and the company I work for is out maybe $4000.

How about just saying "yo, you always use speakerphone in an open office and it is extremely distracting and disturbing others, can you keep it down?"

― frances boredom coconut (Trayce), Wednesday, August 22, 2012 1:34 AM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

It's not even an open office! She's in the office next to mine. Other coworkers further away have already bitched to her and mgmt and yet it continues...

Joe, that's terrible. I hope that person's mess catches up with them.

i explained that the snowflake means cold air and the flame means hot air. she disagreed and explained that the reason it was so hot in there must be because i had it backwards-- the snowflake is what you choose when it's winter (it snows in winter), and the flame is what you choose in summer.

Amazing.

But couldn't she figure it out by the temp of the air coming out of the vents?

she ran her department at a massive loss for a year or so before somebody noticed and she was transferred to work with me instead of being fired.

smdh

xpost Yikes JoeStork isn't there some sort of vulnerable adults law that violates?

I'm hoping to get two people fired soon..two spoiled girls from my alma mater and that is the only reason they got the job. Becase Ikm sick of rude comments and inquiries about my family.

It was like "let's get so and so for you, I know she's your friend from college.". And Ikm like she's a nasty class bigot and phony and my dad is not her business."

T/F: it is appropriate to mention how much your son's circumcision cost during a staff meeting.

"staff" meeting.

staff "meat"ing

how much does a circumcision cost?

And what do you leave for a tip?

Why do people feel the need to heavily re-apply deodorant, at their desks, at least twice a day? You really really dont smell, but that stuff you are spraying stinks like shit. It smells like a cheap men's cologne! Why would a woman put on such a horrible smell? GAH STOP IT.

I mean it makes me feel genuinely sick.

Was thinking about coming to post here about that very thing. One of my co-workers (a woman) keeps a can at the ready and sprays liberally around other co-workers. They've never complained, but it's just a no-no afaic. If you must, deodorise in the damn bathroom!

T/F: it is appropriate to mention how much your son's circumcision cost during a staff meeting.

I heard this in NPR this morning and thought of cwkiii's coworker.

The federal Centers for Disease Control and Convention has estimated circumcision costs range from about $200 to $600 nationwide. Coverage varies among insurers and several states have stopped Medicaid funding for circumcisions.

This kid's was only $100!

I need to let this woman know she got a steal of a deal.

That's incredibly cheap! Hers and the whole range. My ENT billed almost $600 to shove a scope up my N and tell me I have a deviated septum but no polyps. I guess if you're looking for bargains in elective surgery, it's hard to beat circumcision.

it'll be a great ice breaker for the next meeting!
"Hey Deb, regarding last week's conversation about your son's circumcision, you got a HELL of a deal for $100, let me tell you, I never"

Something tells me that if you have to have that done as an adult it costs a few bucks more

Bargains in Elective Surgery sounds like a Brian Eno album or something.

Man, do people even circumcise kids unless they're really 'merican or have a religious obligation?

I am sure there's a long, aggrieved thread about it on ILX somewhere if you really wanted to do a little market research on the topic.

I decline any further conversation on this contentious subject

It's weird, but all my newsfeeds this morning are absolutely ate up with stories about circumcision.

The Great Circumcision Zeitgeist of 2012

It's weird, but all my newsfeeds this morning are absolutely ate up with stories about circumcision.

I love this Southernism!

mh, I'd bet that most Americans still view circumcision as the default option. When my nephew was born, circumcision wasn't presented as a choice - my SIL was given a consent form and told it was time to circumcise him and that was that, no more of a thing than if it they were asking for consent to wash his hair.

Yeah, I think that's been the norm in most areas of the States for the last good couple decades. The only uncircumsized guys I know are not American.

You'd be surprised how often this conversation comes up. Or maybe not.

I know a few (was gonna say "handful") of uncut white Americans, but they're all from the U.P., and so heavily influenced by Euro forces.

the U.P.?

I guess the news mentions are due to a new pediatrician association recommendation on the pro side. However: A recent analysis from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found the U.S. circumcision rate fell from about 63 percent of newborn boys in 1999 to 55 percent in 2010.

the uncircumcised penis zone, the U.P.

U.P. stands for Upper Peninsula, and now that I think about it, I think Je55e was making a very elaborate word joke.

And I'm the one with the folksy colloquialisms...

I wasn't making a joke of any kind. A number of the men I know from the U.P. (of Michigan) are uncircumcised, and most of the men who I know who are uncircumcised are from the U.P.

mh is right - that was the story I heard on the radio this morning that made me think of ccwkii's coworker.

Not really my coworker, but sort of work-related: I've been looking at emails from a colleague's banker, who writes like this:

Thank you…………..they should not ask us for else t…..we s/b fine with what I have turned in already!!! :)

and

Thank you so much for these [colleague's name]………………I just received the email the paperwork……………so it is truly DONE!!! I am sorry for these last items they requested…..it is a cumbersome & illogical process these days……I appreciate your patience & hanging in there!!!

Thank you for your business & please let me know if any questions come up!!!

What professional writes like this?? :D Besides the rampant typos and grammar problems and excessive abbreviations, why the ellipses? Did.....I already post about this!?

A bunch of people, unfortunately.