Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

it'll be a great ice breaker for the next meeting!
"Hey Deb, regarding last week's conversation about your son's circumcision, you got a HELL of a deal for $100, let me tell you, I never"

Something tells me that if you have to have that done as an adult it costs a few bucks more

Bargains in Elective Surgery sounds like a Brian Eno album or something.

Man, do people even circumcise kids unless they're really 'merican or have a religious obligation?

I am sure there's a long, aggrieved thread about it on ILX somewhere if you really wanted to do a little market research on the topic.

I decline any further conversation on this contentious subject

It's weird, but all my newsfeeds this morning are absolutely ate up with stories about circumcision.

The Great Circumcision Zeitgeist of 2012

It's weird, but all my newsfeeds this morning are absolutely ate up with stories about circumcision.

I love this Southernism!

mh, I'd bet that most Americans still view circumcision as the default option. When my nephew was born, circumcision wasn't presented as a choice - my SIL was given a consent form and told it was time to circumcise him and that was that, no more of a thing than if it they were asking for consent to wash his hair.

Yeah, I think that's been the norm in most areas of the States for the last good couple decades. The only uncircumsized guys I know are not American.

You'd be surprised how often this conversation comes up. Or maybe not.

I know a few (was gonna say "handful") of uncut white Americans, but they're all from the U.P., and so heavily influenced by Euro forces.

the U.P.?

I guess the news mentions are due to a new pediatrician association recommendation on the pro side. However: A recent analysis from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention found the U.S. circumcision rate fell from about 63 percent of newborn boys in 1999 to 55 percent in 2010.

the uncircumcised penis zone, the U.P.

U.P. stands for Upper Peninsula, and now that I think about it, I think Je55e was making a very elaborate word joke.

And I'm the one with the folksy colloquialisms...

I wasn't making a joke of any kind. A number of the men I know from the U.P. (of Michigan) are uncircumcised, and most of the men who I know who are uncircumcised are from the U.P.

mh is right - that was the story I heard on the radio this morning that made me think of ccwkii's coworker.

Not really my coworker, but sort of work-related: I've been looking at emails from a colleague's banker, who writes like this:

Thank you…………..they should not ask us for else t…..we s/b fine with what I have turned in already!!! :)

and

Thank you so much for these [colleague's name]………………I just received the email the paperwork……………so it is truly DONE!!! I am sorry for these last items they requested…..it is a cumbersome & illogical process these days……I appreciate your patience & hanging in there!!!

Thank you for your business & please let me know if any questions come up!!!

What professional writes like this?? :D Besides the rampant typos and grammar problems and excessive abbreviations, why the ellipses? Did.....I already post about this!?

A bunch of people, unfortunately.

Maybe I should have left out the second 'n' of "peninsula" when I made my "joke".

I've been noticing similar oddities from a workmate in his tickets recently (I work at an ISP). Stuff like this:

"B___called saying her internet TV works perfectly some days but no theres."

And: "She is look up trail an ADSL2, can someone please call her"

They really just look like brainfarts (I think he meant "not others" and "looking to trial an ADSL2", but it looks like he does them a LOT, and they are really heavy burtation!

Je55e, that is nothing. I used to work as an assistant to an executive assistant, who handled all correspondence with banks. A bank that shall remain unnamed had one employee who closing his e-mail with a daily "toilet joke". Usually they were pretty crass and gross!

When I came on board I had to review some of that correspondence and was horrified. It's not that it was a bad bank or something and we had been doing business with them for a long time...so we couldn't cancel all business on account of one employee. I wonder if they were just disgruntled. However, by the time I saw these e-mails it had been going on for months!

Makes you fear for capitalism that some people feel free to do this!

I am sure they were fired but how they got away with it for that long is beyond me.

Hey guess what guys? There's blood all over the floor in the bathroom.

That reminds me of one of my favorite tweets ever tweeted: https://es.twitter.com/regisl/status/160391002677456897

????

Someone took a shit in the middle of the bathroom floor in the office I worked at in London but there was never any blood. THANK GOD.

It looks like somebody was removing a tampon and missed the toilet or possibly just stood there with her skirts hiked up and bled on the floor for awhile or also possible tried to commit suicide, I don't know. It's not enough to make me think somebody needs medical attention, but it's enough to make me avoid that stall until they clean the floors.

WTF.

xp

that was a response to Mount Cleaners, but it applies to car and ENBB, too.

God, that really really is one of the finest Tweets ever Tweeted. lolol

i wish it were appropriate to yell, 'get your head outta your ass!' on conf calls. this woman hates me because she doesn't follow up on any of the shit she says she will do so i have to harass her about it, and so anytime i ask a question about why this or that went wrong, she responds like i'm an idiot, and i have to be like no, you misunderstood my question. and then she'll answer appropriately.

The otherday I asked a workmate how she was finding some missing fields in some of our order entries, by which I'd meant "because I dont have an easy way to bulk search for this" and she replied with "by doing my job" :|

Bitch.

A couple of years ago i walked into one of the toilets in the building i worked in and there was blood everywhere. On the floor, on three of the cubicle doors, splashed all over the mirror, in all the sinks, etc. Just a ridiculous amount that it's difficult to imagine would have come from a nosebleed. It looked like a crime scene. Checked back twenty minutes later and it was absolutely spotless.

Health and safety protocols mean that any accidents have to be written up and posted on the internal message boards but there was never a word said about it.

you'd be surprised how much blood can come from a nosebleed. on several occasions i have sneezed and bled like a water faucet. and it did resemble a crime scene more than once!

did you then proceed to run in and out of as many stalls as possible in a random office bathroom while violently shaking your head back and forth?

she replied with "by doing my job" :|

Bitch.
--frances boredom coconut (Trayce)

That would drive me up the wall! There's no need for that kind of attitude when you're trying to figure out how to do the job more efficiently

not being a bitch is part of her job too.

or it should be.

"by doing my job"

I just broke up a fight* in my god damn office between a supervisor from another department and one of her employees. Why did they come into our office to fight? What the fuck is a supervisor doing getting into a public yelling match with an employee???

*Verbal, thank god (there is a history of physical fights here, but this was more civilized), so it was just me saying "Hey. Hey! HEY! STOP YELLING IN THIS OFFICE! TAKE IT OUTSIDE NOW."

Hand to God, I wrote an email today that featured the sentence, "The question mark is in there because the sentence is a question."

god, why is it up to me to try to impose some order on this process of [REDACTED]? everyone else involved is higher ranking than i am, and yet it's me who finally got fed up and started creating agendas and forcing them on everyone, and taking notes and blah blah. i can't stand this disorganization, but when you promote the person next to me who has the same job description but TAKES NO INITIATIVE and makes absolutely no effort to facilitate a smoother working environment, i think you are actively trying to get me to hate you.

yes, please paste the contents of the word document into an email and make comments and changes there so i can't see it. it's so much better than using track changes. i do enjoy spending my time comparing line by line changes to make sure i get everything

i must be in a bad mood today!

It's going around.

My coworker buys tuberoses and eucalyptus from the farmers' market every Thursday which means every Thursday afternoon between May and October is Headache Day for me. She offered to move the flowers "farther away" from me, but given that you can smell them all the way down the hall, I don't think moving them two feet away from my desk is going to matter much.

It smells nice from a distance but when I'm sitting in an enclosed space with them, it's like being punched in the face by the candle aisle of a craft store.

Rayuela: can you cut and paste back into a Word document and then compare the two? (ie http://www.codejacked.com/comparing-two-versions-of-a-word-document/)

Sorry if this is no good/too late to be useful/something you already know about!

Hand to God, I wrote an email today that featured the sentence, "The question mark is in there because the sentence is a question."

Oh god thats hilarious. I had a similar wtf yesterday: "why is this customers username and password the same thing?". Considering they pick their own, HOW WOULD I KNOW. Customer is stupid?

Hot tuna is not a suitable office lunch food, especially when eaten at your desk in a small office

Oh my no.

A creamy tuna/mushroom pasta sauce is the only thing I've made in the last 10 years that literally made my wife scream when she smelled it.