All she heard was congratulations and my chunky frame apparently led her to believe I was concealing a pregnancy! Not awkward, promise. (A little awkward. Luckily it's someone I can threaten to 'duel in the parking lot after work.')
― she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 17:21 (eleven years ago) link
That has happened to me - chirpy congratulation on bun in the oven in a packed and silent room full of co-workers...
― ljubljana, Tuesday, 2 October 2012 22:41 (eleven years ago) link
God, people are so fucking weird
― bell biv devo (Stevie D(eux)), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 22:41 (eleven years ago) link
^^^^
― the physical impossibility of sb in the mind of someone fping (silby), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 22:45 (eleven years ago) link
It is weird! I would never! Ljub, if you want to split childcare costs let me know :P
― she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 23:06 (eleven years ago) link
I'm sadistic, but I take great, GREAT pleasure in innocently, hurtfully saying "but I'm not pregnant?!" when people do that. The mortified look on their face is enough for me :D
― frances boredom coconut (Trayce), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 23:18 (eleven years ago) link
I am constantly dumbfounded by how clueless and tactless people can be
― bell biv devo (Stevie D(eux)), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 23:25 (eleven years ago) link
xp Hahaha. I think I said "what the hell, jerk!" or something similar. She's not an easily embarrassed type sadly.
― she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Tuesday, 2 October 2012 23:26 (eleven years ago) link
FFM, I'll do the school run if you do the weekends
― ljubljana, Tuesday, 2 October 2012 23:51 (eleven years ago) link
Sounds like a plan!
― she started dancing to that (Finefinemusic), Wednesday, 3 October 2012 00:03 (eleven years ago) link
My boss asked for help attaching photographs from My Pictures to an email using Outlook. She couldn't find the right picture b/c they were not showing up as thumbnails, so I told her just to go to Start and then to My Pictures so we could copy and paste them into the email. Before I could stop her, she closed her draft email and closed Outlook before clicking Start. That was weird b/c she definitely is more knowledgeable than that.
Next I had to basically give her a grueling tutorial on how to copy and paste a file. She seemed to think she had to open the picture and copy it from the image itself. Back in Outlook, she kept trying to paste it in the subject line - probably thinking it was the attachments line.
Then she wanted to send two other pictures to another person. She went to close Outlook again but I stopped her. She said, "But I have to go to the pictures folder!" I told her that she didn't have to close Outlook to do that - just click Start. She sat still, looking baffled, said, "But then how do I get to the Pictures folder?" and closed Outlook. Then I had to repeat my entire Copy/Paste 101, but this time with the black magic of selecting multiple files ;__; which she does ALL THE TIME in other programs. She performs ALL of those tasks all the time
In Outlook, she tried to paste the files into the subject line.
After all that she said, "Argh. Why can't Blackberry make the process more user friendly?"
― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Monday, 8 October 2012 21:21 (eleven years ago) link
o_O
― www.toilet-guru.com (silby), Monday, 8 October 2012 21:31 (eleven years ago) link
FROM: STAFFTO: MANAGEMENTSUBJECT: MANDATORY TRAINING, TAKE ASAP
EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY: ALL MANAGEMENT MUST TAKE THE FOLLOWING TRAINING AS SOON AS POSSIBLE:
"HOW TO USE THE THING THAT YOU USE EVERY DAY FOR 8 HOURS"INCLUDING ESSENTIAL MODULES SUCH AS "HOW TO COPY AND PASTE", "SAVE VS. SAVE AS - HOW DO I EVEN", "CTRL+S, CTRL+C, CTRL+X, CTRL+V > THEY WILL SAVE YOU HUNDREDS OF HOURS", "WHAT DOES CTRL MEAN??"
― Thanks WEBSITE!! (Z S), Monday, 8 October 2012 21:59 (eleven years ago) link
i get it that people that grew up without computers aren't going to get it as quickly, but jesus fucking christ. it's like i go outside to grab a coffee but i accidentally take a left instead of a right. i realize that i'm at the wrong intersection. what do i do?! what do i do!? i could just recalibrate and walk the proper direction but instead i call a cab and go home, go to sleep, wake up again, go back to work, and then go back outside to get a coffee. THIS time i'll take a right instead of a left.
― Thanks WEBSITE!! (Z S), Monday, 8 October 2012 22:03 (eleven years ago) link
My boss asked for help attaching photographs from My Pictures to an email using Outlook. She
This is the point when I knew who posted this.
― carl agatha, Monday, 8 October 2012 23:24 (eleven years ago) link
Haha, yes. Post about someone behaving very much in character.
ZS, yes, tho today she was extra, super special. She definitely knows most of the shit she couldn't do today, but it was like she was senile! I was felt a touch of genuine concern, but she is otherwise completely normal. She just came down with an acute case of the dumbs today.
― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Monday, 8 October 2012 23:42 (eleven years ago) link
it's like i go outside to grab a coffee but i accidentally take a left instead of a right. i realize that i'm at the wrong intersection. what do i do?! what do i do!?
And here's what our co-workers do:
CO-WORKER: I think I'm at the wrong intersection. Could you give me directions to the coffeeshop?
YOU: Sure. It's fairly nearby. First, just go back to –
CO-WORKER: Okay, this bus just stopped and I'm giving the driver my fare. What next? *doors shut*
― pplains, Monday, 8 October 2012 23:57 (eleven years ago) link
Well, now I know who the undecided voters are.
― tokyo rosemary, Monday, 8 October 2012 23:59 (eleven years ago) link
Although one girl does like Ron Paul.
― tokyo rosemary, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 00:00 (eleven years ago) link
Grr.
I spend a fair amount of time analyzing my bosses' behaviors and I think her deal is that when it comes to computers, she can't seem to transfer knowledge. I.e., she knows how to select text in Word (to copy, cut, delete, whatever), but more than once when she was online, she called me into her office to ask how to select text from a web page. I remember telling her "Exactly like you do in Word," and her not understanding. It's like learning to drive from scratch - from the point of training wheels on a bicycle, even - when you go from a street to a freeway.
Also, is there a thread for bitching about stupid fucking vendors and clients??
― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 00:03 (eleven years ago) link
this seems close enough
― www.toilet-guru.com (silby), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 00:04 (eleven years ago) link
I'm a candidate for a support engineer job but the people I'd be supporting are software developers and system administrators and the systems I'd be supporting are Linux servers, but maybe it will turn out that there's a more-advanced version of this I'll have to deal with.
But yeah computers are really difficult for people and it isn't necessarily their fault!
― www.toilet-guru.com (silby), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 00:05 (eleven years ago) link
Why are people who are paid so much so frequently senile/forgetful/cbf ? Mine yelled at the entire support team a few weeks back for an "unauthorised" purchase of 4 hard drives for a server RAID array. Hard drives he'd recommended and approved purchase of mere days earlier. This was pointed out to him but he didnt apologise.
He bailed me up last week to demand I send him some info on certain supplier accounts ASAP OMG NEED IT URGENTLY.
Which'd be fine... except it was info he already had, had been sent to him by me TWICE, and had taken me some hours to write up :|
I just re-sent it to him. With the relevant bits bolded. Honestly sometimes its like that Simpsons episode where Mr Burns keeps demanding Don Mattingly shave off sideburns he doesnt even have. This guy can be told to his face "YOU HAVE THAT INFO ALREADY" and he just yells "DONT COMPLIN JUST DO AS I ASK".
FFS.
― Una Stubbs' Tears (Trayce), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 02:06 (eleven years ago) link
Also I did lol massively at ""SAVE VS. SAVE AS - HOW DO I EVEN".
― Una Stubbs' Tears (Trayce), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 02:07 (eleven years ago) link
Sometimes I can see where I could start getting that way with computer stuff. There is a shit-effin-ton of industry specific software and proprietary add-ins that I've never seen before and I managed to learn the very basics of it but there's just so much and I'm kind of crazy busy and I get a little "Why doesn't this just do exactly what I want it to do right now?!?!!!?! Fuck it I'm calling the service desk" about renaming a file in the document management system. (Right click, select "properties," change the name. :/ )
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 02:44 (eleven years ago) link
The software etc is at the new job. I forgot that part.
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 02:45 (eleven years ago) link
I've said it before, but it bears repeating: a little part of me dies whenever I hear the reporter behind me say to someone over the phone, "Hey there, just wanted to give you a shout..."
GIVE YOU A SHOUTGIVE YOU A SHOUT
BASTARD IN A BASKETBASTARD IN A BASKET
He also writes somewhere in his copy each week: "The sush and such deal tipped the scales at $780,000...." EVERY SINGLE WEEK.
― pplains, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 02:48 (eleven years ago) link
Ha! I didn't know what you were talking about b/c I somehow missed that post, and yes, hardy lol. Plus I just now re-read i could just recalibrate and walk the proper direction but instead i call a cab and go home, go to sleep, wake up again, go back to work, I LOLed so hard I spewed food pizza all over my monitor. Can I excelsior that even though this thread is deindexed?
xps
― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 03:12 (eleven years ago) link
food pizza as opposed to that liquid sort! =)
― Una Stubbs' Tears (Trayce), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 03:29 (eleven years ago) link
oh - lol - I changed it b/c it rhymed, not to differentiate from Play-Doh pizza.
― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 03:53 (eleven years ago) link
yeah i worked with someone who'd say "give you a shout," fucking annoying
― crisp apple morning (clouds), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 04:38 (eleven years ago) link
Liquid Pizza would be interesting.
― a great poke for Jet Set Willy (snoball), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 08:55 (eleven years ago) link
Wait, that would be Pizza Soup.
I was thinking like Liquid Smoke but pizza flavored.
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 12:33 (eleven years ago) link
Our side of the building is mostly empty except for a row of 5 of us, a few managers and a woman in the corner office adjacent to the fire escape. It's a pretty quiet area.
EXCEPT. The woman by the fire escape has the most annoying habit of shouting from her office at whoever is passing by. She'll keep talking to someone who's just left her office HEY DON'T FORGET TO BLAH BLAH BLAH. Or if someone she knows walks anywhere near her office door she'll caterwaul HEY DID YOU GET THAT THING I SENT YOU? WHAT DO YOU THINK?
And if she gets no response she'll repeat the same thing 10 times. At the same volume. It's horrific.
I get dejavu because she sounds EXACTLY like my across the street neighbor, a terrible woman who screams from inside the house at her children playing in the front yard.
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:47 (eleven years ago) link
Like, she NEVER gets up from her desk!! She will not walk to the person to lower her volume. She just uses her horrible shrill voice like a tractor beam to drag people into her office. It's insane.
Every day I want to go over and shove a sock in her mouth.
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:48 (eleven years ago) link
I say this without even thinking about it - why is it annoying?
― emil.y, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:49 (eleven years ago) link
Unless the person actually means shouting, a la Veg's co-worker.
― emil.y, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:50 (eleven years ago) link
oh she'll give you a shout alright, lol
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:51 (eleven years ago) link
emil.y, what if you said in every single fucking post.
This guy's on the phone, making calls all day. And in every single phone call, he uses that phrase.
Sometimes it's a variation, like "I want to give you a shout back after we talked the other day…"
― pplains, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:54 (eleven years ago) link
It's more widely used in the UK I think.
― ljubljana, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 15:58 (eleven years ago) link
Yeah, sounds like it. Here it's pretty much interchangeable with "give you a call", "let you know", "ring you back", "get in contact" etc. Don't think anyone would even notice that you were using an idiom rather than a more literal phrase.
― emil.y, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 16:08 (eleven years ago) link
Maybe I'll anonymously email him your post and say "Here are four other phrases you can use."
― pplains, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 16:09 (eleven years ago) link
Hahaha.
If it's not in not in widespread use I can see it being some sort of hideous affectation, I guess.
― emil.y, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 16:09 (eleven years ago) link
yes, like my usual gripe about 'mericans saying "cheers" and "no worries" — especially if it's EVERY OTHER FUCKING WORD
― crisp apple morning (clouds), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 16:39 (eleven years ago) link
that would be unweildy
― Technology of the Big Muff (DJP), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 16:43 (eleven years ago) link
I think "no worries" is pretty normal in the U.S.... I certainly use it regularly (interchangeably with "no problem") and I hear it said commonly.
― (*・_・)ノ⌒ ☆ (Je55e), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 18:52 (eleven years ago) link
It's mostly just annoying because you always say it with the comedy Australian accent.
― carl agatha, Tuesday, 9 October 2012 20:05 (eleven years ago) link
nawurries mayte
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 20:09 (eleven years ago) link
Sometimes I can see where I could start getting that way with computer stuff. There is a shit-effin-ton of industry specific software and proprietary add-ins that I've never seen before and I managed to learn the very basics of it but there's just so much and I'm kind of crazy busy and I get a little "Why doesn't this just do exactly what I want it to do right now?!?!!!?!
Ha I feel you on this. As a programmer I probably ought to be better at keeping up but I know Excel 2003 pretty in-depth and I am secretly still running it 6 months after IT upgraded everyone else to 2007 (not 2010, that would be far too up-to-date for our IT dept) because fuck it I can't even find anything in that ribbon shit.
Also I started Powerpoint today because someone asked how to do a Powerpoint macro and I got all "I can do Excel macros and Access macros and Word macros, how hard can it be?" and then within ten minutes I was like "what is this shit I don't even, how does anyone use this" because it took me a minute to find the damn "start presentation" button and because macro stuff is different in Powerpoint for some reason
― still small voice of clam (a passing spacecadet), Tuesday, 9 October 2012 20:11 (eleven years ago) link