Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

xxp yeah, i don't really know what that is... maybe part of the spiderman alternate lifestyle collection. hopefully this thread's googleproofed because i can't imagine there are too many pages out there selling those

"Vegan watch" would imply a non-leather band.

Cf. vegan shoes

i'm trying not to be that guy but lol vegan watch i know i know i'll stop

Presumably "vegan Spiderman watch" means a watch that does not have a leather band? Which happen to be the vast majority of search results for "Spiderman watch," because how many children's watches come with leather bands?

Not that your "eat a steak dur dur dur" coworker is something other than an asshole, mind you. Just that I can't quite get past somebody needing to search for a "vegan Spiderman watch" like it's something that needs to even be labeled as such or is somehow tough to find.

Just miles and miles of vegan Spiderman watches right here

And yes, there are adult Spiderman watches with leather bands but I am not going to apologize to anyone offended by my suggestion that Spiderman watches are properly for children.

well now i am outraged

Maybe you can get Spiderman to come to your next birthday party to soothe your fury.

only if he wears leather

it got creepy, didn't it?

Would invite Italian spider man to my birthday party

Spidergimp

I've clearly been living in Brighton for too long, because I understood the concept of a vegan watch immediately.

hopefully this thread's googleproofed because i can't imagine there are too many pages out there selling those

Yes, it was de-indexed earlier this year, so we're safe. vegan watches vegan spidermen vegan spiders vegan men

i am interested in leather spiderman

maybe

He won't be interested in someone so ambivalent.

Stake your claim!

Also red dye made of these dudes could be a reason why you would want your Spiderman watch to be labeled as vegan.

i'd like to think of it as a watch featuring vegan spiderman. i mean, spiderman's a young guy, there's probably a lot of shit he wants to try out

i kinda think of this guy as vegan spiderman

http://collider.com/wp-content/uploads/amazing-spider-man-andrew-garfield-damage.jpg

- Boss has been complaining about his old, slow, buggy, POS desktop computer for months.
- IT guy set up his laptop to be his main machine.
- He has still been using the old POS desktop and complaining about it.

- Co-worker's desktop bit the dust.

- Boss suggests that co-worker can just have his old (POS) desktop since he now has the laptop.
????????

(POS = Piece of Shit, not Point of Sale)

[kills thread by bitching about coworker]

how dare you stay on topic

In an email to me, Jesse once named the Quad Cities as Rock Island, Moline, Davenport, and Spiderman.

lol

agggghhhh

lovely coworker backing up someone on vacation. she's very good at her job but as a backup omg she drives me insane.
she's someone who is so thorough as to ask questions that NO_ONE has the answers to, where the previous 2 examples of the process she needs to follow are not enough to create a body of evidence for her and she turns the whole thing into a fucking royal commission coroner's inquest, slowing the whole process down to a ridiculous crawl. she has now turned a very simple request into a 24 hour odyssey and I just want to slam my head into my desk repeatedly until it stops

i'm too tired for this bullshit

Hmm. Sounds like this could be the last time she's called to back up someone on vacation. Ridiculous like a fox.

one more

i hate being the backup for someone who never involves you in ANY of their day to day work until the day before they go on vacation, and then give you a panicked speech about everything that needs to be done in vague handwavey sketches that you know will become a giant clusterfuck within a day of them being gone

help me
help you

ugh

I don't have co-workers anymore but I noticed this year everyone I know from all over received a crocheted-like fluffy scarf from the crafty co-worker.
Then I received the exact scarf from a friend.
When I asked if she made it she said no, her co-worker made it for her to give to me. Co-Worker Scarf, sure you got one.

day one of flying blind, backing up vague handwavey coworker on vacation (who also happens to have the most notoriously needy, handholding, minutiae-needing account base in the entire company)

omg
deluge of things I knew nothing about
til noon it was terrifying. open his email 'YOU HAVE 200 UNREAD MESSAGES' wtf
by the end of the day, it was ok
but uuuuuuuuuuuuuugh talk about throwing me in the deep end.

thank god for Outlook keyword 'search' function, if I couldn't trawl his emails to find out what the fuck everyone was talking about i'd have been screwed

3 more days of this

I got ppl (hopefully) backing me up for 3 weeks. We have a wiki, and EERYTHING I do is listed as how-tos in it. Has been for years. Every year, that said, I get asked the same dumb questions. By people who have worked there longer than me, backed me up before more than once, and just shouldnt need to ask.

Txt the other day "how do I access the fax mailbox?" (our faxes come via email). I'm like.... seriously? You're asking me this NOW? I just said "use outlooks webmail? nfi what the pwd is by the way, ask the MIS guy". Havent heard anoher word.

I expect to come back to a giant pile of badly or not-done mess. Meanwhile I flat out REFUSE to even look at my work mail. This is the only decent, fully switched off break I get all year (my role doesnt allow long breaks at any other time as there's always shit on)

we had a whole wiki thing implemented a few years ago but none of my coworkers want to read anything, they just want magical question-answerers sitting on their laps 24/7

so it wallowed in unupdatedness

hence my current situation lol

Oh I update mine all the time. Fuck if anyone can be arsed RingTFM, tho.

none of my coworkers want to read anything, they just want magical question-answerers sitting on their laps 24/7

This is the story of my life

My manager told me I should I think about taking antibiotics. All I have is a cold!

at my previous job, when i expressed frustration at a coworker who refused to read emails or how-to docs and instead just asked me the same question over and over again, he unironically told me that he was in sales, and as a result that his time was more important than having to dig through his email to find the answer to a question.

he was speaking the truth

it took me nearly 10 years to figure out that binders, wikis and helpful, clearly worded docs were as useless as tits on a bull to salesppl who live to wave their arms robotically and talk loudly and BE SO IMPORTANT THAT I HAVE NO TIME TO PUT ANY WORDS IN MY HEADFACEHOLE OTHER THAN MY OWN YOU ARE AWESOME

wooo just broke the glass on the old cynicism meter lol

headfacehole
i'd rather die
than reader your binder, lol

to the tune of 'yesterday', right?

he unironically told me that he was in sales, and as a result that his time was more important than having to dig through his email to find the answer to a question

this is a serious candidate for one of the worst things i've ever heard

i want to go back in time and place and physically pummel him

Its not just sales. The support TL blankly informed me a while ago that something SHE wanted to find out she "doesnt have time to read up on, thats your job to do and tell me".

What. The. Fuck.

Its not just sales.

Also lawyers.

All but one of our lawyers enter their time directly on the billing system. The one who won't doesn't b/c he truly can not figure it out. All he has to do is log in, look up the client, and enter the work description, but he fucks it up.

Instead he hand writes his work,descriptions, then later and transcribes the work to an Excel file (one for each day), which he emails to a secretary, who transfers them into the billing system - after she has sent a dozen emails w/ questions.

Yesterday one of the other partners, who is that guy's friend, bitched to me about this absurd waste of resources (with extra opportunities for errors). He said he'd personally given him a tutorial, but it was an unequivocal failure.

if you asked him why he won't learn he'd say 'biil'n time's bogus je55e'

Not about co-workers, but sometimes clients come in and go, "how come you don't talk to so-and-so anymore", or "do you want so-and-so's e-mail / Facebook / phone number"....and it's not someone I want to hear from ever again! Moreover, my family and co-workers aren't any of that person's business! I didn't like her and I'm kind of busy these days...I just don't want that person's social disease in my workplace or at home and I don't feel like explaining it to a near stranger.

My stupid annoying co-workers are currently rehashing their almost daily "lazy benefit cheats have giant TVs and private jets while I work my arse off and pay taxes and struggle to make ends meet" rants.

They never mention struggling to make ends meet when they're talking about paying over £200 for a fucking golf club.

at my previous job, when i expressed frustration at a coworker who refused to read emails or how-to docs and instead just asked me the same question over and over again, he unironically told me that he was in sales, and as a result that his time was more important than having to dig through his email to find the answer to a question.

― eh mec, elle est ou ma caisse? (ytth), Thursday, 3 January 2013 03:26 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Coming from a sales background, I can empathise, but all too often emails from management or marketing take the form of densely-worded prose that go on for multiple paragraphs including a long preamble and loads of other bumph that's superfluous to the essential details. When you're being targeted on performance (i.e. how many clients you speak to in a day, how many of these you sell to) receiving these things is such a pain in the arse. Bulletpoints exist for a reason!

Depends on how good a golfer you are - if it wasn't for golf my late father wouldn't be able to pay bills, it's how he made business friends.

True story - he started out working parks and country clubs as a poor kid, mastered golf and tennis and some of those other games, used his sports ability to get jobs and contacts. He won a national amateur tournamnent and was good enough to be a pro! Not a typical experience, tho.

Not arguing with you - a lot of office dorks are SHIT at golf and then spend all that money on it. And I sit there listening to their golf stories and get steamed...I picture their ass getting beat by some nobody kid.

This guy's an engineer in his 50s playing golf as a hobby with a 3 handicap. He and his wife are earning around £40k each. He has no children. He aint struggling to make ends meet.