Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

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WANTS

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:54 (eighteen years ago) link

YOUR

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:54 (eighteen years ago) link

BODY!!!!!!!!

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:54 (eighteen years ago) link

pop her cherry, andrew!

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:54 (eighteen years ago) link

there will be blood on the Sissel Original Swiss Ball Pro® tonight.

wait. that took a weird turn. one i'm not willing or ready to address right now.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:56 (eighteen years ago) link

haha best xpost ever

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:57 (eighteen years ago) link

I like my co workers, although there is this weird guy upstairs called Stevie who keeps talking to me and stuff.

i'd just like to clarify that this isn't me. i *am a weird guy called stevie, but i don't work above anyone!

― stevie (stevie), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 15:59 (eighteen years ago) link

Gosh, andrew. I hope you don't accidentally drop a box of thumbtacks on the floor behind you.

ya know, because they'll really hurt when they stick in her back.

― when something smacks of something (dave225.3), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 16:01 (eighteen years ago) link

that other stevie is an ilxor i think, stevie

xpost

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 16:01 (eighteen years ago) link

If I didn't know you already, andrew, I would have thought that you work at Google:

http://www.ruggedelegantliving.com/a/images/google.balls.jpg

My annoying co-workers? Well...

You miss the “I feel you pain” President? Why am I not surprised? Eight times in his eight years Americans were attacked by al-Qaida, over a thousand lives lost, and he did not ONE thing in response. Their blood is on his hands and YOUR hands. His administration had concrete evidence of pre-911 al-Qaida plans and his administration BLOCKED the Military and the Intel Agencies, and Police Depts from exchanging information. The 3,000 lives lost are on his head and YOURS.

...I'm not crazy about 'em.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Wednesday, 7 September 2005 16:17 (eighteen years ago) link

The woman across from me keeps bursting into tears as we’re moving buildings and she’ll have to get a bus and a tram.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Thursday, 8 September 2005 13:48 (eighteen years ago) link

me: *reads ILX for an hour*
little person: "are you cleaning up the computer?" [note: this is her term for defragging]
me: "yes"
little person: "i thought so with all that gibberish on the screen"

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, 8 September 2005 13:56 (eighteen years ago) link

little person?

― Raston Warrior Robot (alix), Thursday, 8 September 2005 13:57 (eighteen years ago) link

She works for Willy Wonka.

― David R. (popshots75`), Thursday, 8 September 2005 13:59 (eighteen years ago) link

Coworker: Do we have yesterday's Guardian?
Me: Yes, it'll be in the newspaper rack.
Coworker: ...
Me: [points] The metal one... on the wall there.
Coworker: [now standing at rack but not doing anything] But... where IS it?

(Throughout this discussion I am in the middle of serving a student or trying to.)

My brain: [shotuing] Jesus woman, is flicking through a couple of newspapers to find the right one really beneath/beyond you?
Me: ...

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 8 September 2005 14:07 (eighteen years ago) link

An employee got a reprimanding email from my mum/boss. As I can read all the emails, I could see the entire email. It was angry but not over the top.

She sniffled the rest of the day.

I rrrrreally didn't know what to do.

Awkward silence for the rest of the day.

― nathalie's pocket revolution (stevie nixed), Thursday, 8 September 2005 14:13 (eighteen years ago) link

My little person coworker NEVER TIPS PEOPLE, and she orders lunch every day. How she can sleep at night is beyond my understanding. She even quibbles if they don't give her her idiotic QUARTER back as change. Anyway, so just now she gets food delivered and of course doesn't tip. However, she does give the delivery guy a round of applause and a condescending "good boy" for being 15 minutes early. I would have dumped a side salad on her demented, ill-proportioned head.

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, 8 September 2005 15:41 (eighteen years ago) link

let the lip-smacking commence

― roxymuzak (roxymuzak), Thursday, 8 September 2005 15:54 (eighteen years ago) link

have just had an email with two attachements, two excel spreadsheets. one had phone numbers, phone make and model number. the other had phone numbers, the same numbers, and associated urls. there were 3 of them in total. three lots of 4 columns spread over 2 excel spreadsheets and sent as attachments. how is this easier than just pasting the information as text into the body of the message? oh, and because the phone numbers were quite long it showed them in engineering format: 4.47999E+8.

― koogs (koogs), Thursday, 8 September 2005 16:30 (eighteen years ago) link

Memo with details of new university branding and house style sent round everyone who works here. We are to use Arial 12pt for everything. Sixty minutes later, Office Manager sends out the agenda for tomorrow's staff meeting. In Comic 14pt bold.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Friday, 9 September 2005 08:36 (eighteen years ago) link

There is nothing worse than being monumentally frustrated and shitty with the person you sit next to and are on the same shift as at work... when that person also happens to be yr best friend outside of work.

Combine anger and guilt over being angry, and it makes me feel really crap.

I thnk I'll talk to my b/f about whether I/we can afford for me to quit.

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 9 September 2005 08:38 (eighteen years ago) link

not annoying, slightly stupid ... and hysterically funny. a respected friend and colleague has forgotten his trousers.

yes, seriously. he cycled in wearing a pair of comedy shorts, intending to change into a pair of decent keks when he got to work. unfortunately, he omitted to put said keks in his bag. so he's now sitting at his mac looking a bit miserable, while everybody points and laughs at his knees. to make matters worse, he sits right by an enormous window.

despite the fact it is pissing down with rain, he's going to stick it out for the whole day. rather than doing what i'd have done, which is rushing to the nearest gentleman's outfitter and getting a big pair of slacks pronto.

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Friday, 9 September 2005 10:34 (eighteen years ago) link

Man, that’s like a bad dream.
Maybe he’ll wake up in a minute and get ready for work and pay special attention to remembering his troosers.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Friday, 9 September 2005 10:47 (eighteen years ago) link

Dear god Madchen, that's fantastic! And awful, obv. My co-workers are really nice, though one almost to the point of being annoying. Relentlessly cheerful and overly polite but she's lovely really.

― Crackity (Crackity Jones), Friday, 9 September 2005 10:49 (eighteen years ago) link

Man, that’s like a bad dream.

that's what i said to him. but no, he hasn't woken up. instead he's just been sitting in the executive editor's office having an important meeting about the next few months' work. hhaaa!

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:25 (eighteen years ago) link

ha ha ha.
i so wish i was there.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:30 (eighteen years ago) link

He's a hero. I'm very impressed that he would tough it out. Just like that Bridget Jones girl.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:30 (eighteen years ago) link

I've gone to work without a bra before. Thankfully, my boss was a doll and let me cycle home to put one on.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:31 (eighteen years ago) link

UH BRALESS CYCLING UHHHHH

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:34 (eighteen years ago) link

That came out creepier than intended, sorry.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:34 (eighteen years ago) link

But not very sorry.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:42 (eighteen years ago) link

I was wearing a big 1970s Polish ski jacket for warmth (it was very early in the morning, hence my dopey state) and really didn't look particularly special.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:54 (eighteen years ago) link

I think it was more about the concept than about the reality.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 9 September 2005 13:56 (eighteen years ago) link

grimly, post a pic of his shorts.

please.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Friday, 9 September 2005 14:00 (eighteen years ago) link

i think that might be a little difficult to do without getting battered.

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Friday, 9 September 2005 14:08 (eighteen years ago) link

Ha
I meant a similar pair from images.

― not-goodwin (not-goodwin), Friday, 9 September 2005 14:18 (eighteen years ago) link

I was just on the phone, and one of my coworkers comes and looks in my office to ask me something. I am clearly on the phone, but she stands in the doorway and stares at me. Just stands there. Finally after like 30 seconds she says "Come find me when you're done." So I finish up my call, go find her, and she...wants me to replace the water jug on the cooler. Which was clearly urgent enough for her to stand in my doorway waiting for me to get off the phone.

― n/a (Nick A.), Friday, 9 September 2005 15:42 (eighteen years ago) link

she came in to admit her feelings for you and ask you if you'd like to get together sometime. but while you were on the phone she chickened out and asked you about changing the dumb water jug instead.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Friday, 9 September 2005 15:46 (eighteen years ago) link

I meant a similar pair from images.

imagine the kind of thing stanley might have been wearing when he met livingstone, only baggier, and teamed with blue socks and brown suede shoes.

― grimly fiendish (grimlord), Friday, 9 September 2005 16:05 (eighteen years ago) link

My stupid, annoying co-worker has been receiving emails meant for me since 15th August. Has she forwarded them to me to deal with? Has she fuck. Until today. My inbox pinged 54 times. I had to have a word. No wonder she's on extended probation and we have to write a report card for her at the end of each day. What a fucking stupidy stupid.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 13:33 (eighteen years ago) link

A "report card"???
I hope that post is what you will be putting on it!

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 13:40 (eighteen years ago) link

It's to back ourselves up in case she takes us to tribunal when we terminate her employment. Some people in the office think the 'in case' should be a 'when'. The second 'when' is definitely a 'when'.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 13:48 (eighteen years ago) link

Are you awaiting a suitably opportune moment to get rid of her?

― Crackity (Crackity Jones), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 13:54 (eighteen years ago) link

To The Person In My Office Who Decanted Their Colostomy Bag Into The Coffee Dispenser:

I'd like to note that I made the coffee today and it's bangin'. I feel like putting up instructions.

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 13:54 (eighteen years ago) link

The end of her probation period is the moment. Three weeks to go!

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 13:59 (eighteen years ago) link

I feel really guilty this week: my assistant just got a first "when" (though he possibly had had a few prior my taking this job )and there you go...he won´t be back at his desk from 1st Oct onwards

― olenska (olenska), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:02 (eighteen years ago) link

Don't feel guilty, feel liberated!

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:03 (eighteen years ago) link

Mädchen: does she *know* you're all having to do this?

― Forest Pines (ForestPines), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:08 (eighteen years ago) link

Yes, it's a list of tasks we've asked her to do with our comments/signature and she keeps it in her drawer.

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:21 (eighteen years ago) link

One of my comments was about how, if you put Mr John Smith in line 1 of the address at the top of a letter, you do not begin your letter Dear Mrs Smith. I also had to teach her how to fold a letter so it fits in the envelope. She went home at 12.30 and I am still wound up!

― Mädchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 20 September 2005 14:23 (eighteen years ago) link

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