Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

lol at this very moment, four feet away, my acting boss is answering questions from our brand new CEO who is asking simple, basic questions about what we do and he is DYING ON HIS FEET

the problem is that this will just make him less confident and he will now be more bullying and weird and passive-aggressive than ever

It always amazes me how some people seem to get into higher up roles by the skin of their teeth and you wonder how they hold a job when they're as dense as dark matter.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dilbert_Principle

So I work in a building with like 30 other people, everyone pretty much knows everybody and socially things are relatively laid back most of the time. But there's been occasional rashes of people's lunches/etc. getting stolen out of the refrigerator everybody uses, and in the last couple weeks I've had 2 cans of soda stolen. This morning I shook the shit out of a soda can and put it in the fridge and am waiting to see how long it takes to disappear. Am I just inevitably egging this on to become a bigger thing than it has any right to be, or should I be proud of my lame attempt at vigilante justice?

you watched that Simpsons ep where Bart blows up Homer with a shook-up Duff, didn't you.

well bitching and whining about it in an email to the entire staff will just make you the cheap bitchy, whiny guy and just letting people steal your stuff is not an option so i honestly think you did the best thing.

well bitching and whining about it in an email to the entire staff will just make you the cheap bitchy, whiny guy

Heh I did this and yeah to people I don't normally interact with I'm the guy who got pissed off about stolen cheese, but on the upside no-one's stolen my food since then, so y'know, whatevs.

yeah definitely not doing an e-mail or anything like that.

actually the thing that complicates this is that the guy who works next to me also had a soda stolen yesterday, so he just put a post-it on the refrigerator noting both thefts. so whereas before only people in my little dept. know that I had a soda stolen recently, now it's public knowledge and the soda bomb could be more easily traced back to me. I kinda covered my ass by using a different type of soda than what I usually bring in and putting it in a different place than I usually do, though, so I'm prepared to play dumb.

you watched that Simpsons ep where Bart blows up Homer with a shook-up Duff, didn't you.

― WmC, Thursday, February 26, 2009 11:54 AM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

true story, yesterday for like an hour I was feeling annoyed about this and thinking "is there something I could do to booby-trap a soda? cover it in a clear sticky material? no. hide something weird at the bottom of the can? no....oh, duh, I can just shake it up, why didn't I think of that an hour ago?"

on the other hand, it could easily be tracked ot him, since he posted the note.

Why would it be bad if the thief found out who it was who shook up the soda anyway?

It wouldn't necessarily, but I'd rather just burn them so they wouldn't wanna do it again than have a big confrontation.

I mean I'm kinda psyched about it working but at the same time a lil embarrassed to be all immature and "lol REVENGE" about this.

it'll be funny more than anything, esp if you tell a few other coworkers what you've done (obv coworkers who aren't likely to be the culprit), so then when you all hear the explosion and the resulting cussing, you can all eye each other and snigger.

i would totally do this.

the person wont confront you because then they would have to admit to being the soda stealer.

haha yeah who knows...the thing is that we have 4 floors, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't anybody on my floor, so if I find out who did it, it'll probably be hearsay later on, or if someone is walking around with a big wet stain on their shirt.

Can't wait to find out it's the CEO, looking to find out who to bill for his ruined suit.

Actually I hope that doesn't happen, I approve of soda-bomb.

lol yeah there is one bigwig I would actually be freaked out if it was him, but he's not around that often so I doubt it. mostly I'm worried it'll be someone I'm totally friendly with or have to work with fairly often.

back in my old job for a freelance shift today and seriously, even after 3 months out of there it's exactly the same as ever.

the thing I notice is that because everyone there has been there about 6 years or so, and the job is fairly rote/non changing, they all have their own systems for doing things and they want you to adhere to these when you're working with them.

sadly they don't realise this, and each one assumes their particular system is the be all and end all, and will act as if you don't know how to do the job if you try and do things in the way you did them last time you were there.

part of the problem is cos I trained in this place so I have to be quite docile to colleagues. this is fine, it's only casual work and that doesn't bother me. but it is FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE to have to have one co-worker, eg S today, saying "oh no you need to add in this to that story, did nobody show you this? someone should have shown you."

and it's like "nobody showed me cos you're the only one who does this", but it's too hard to explain that.

jesus I hate that office...better off unemployed.

Brodie caught the lunchroom bandit red-handed. It was Officer Gaffney...

> and it's like "nobody showed me cos you're the only one who does this", but it's too hard to explain that.

i get this all the time. people expect you to know their code or their procedures despite not documenting them or, indeed, mentioning them to anyone else ever. we aren't psychic.

Looking forward to hearing about the soda-bomb!

Someone once stole the cheese from inside my sandwich, but left the sandwich itself behind. I didn't know until I bit into it, then found myself wondering about the hygiene of whoever had been handling my food.

I had a softdrink-stealer in a previous job, and I was pretty sure who it was but of course couldnt accuse anyone blind because it was this brand of energy drink a lot of us drank, so seeing someone else with one, they could have got it themselves.

So a workmate suggested I tag the base of some new cans with an X in permanent marker. We did this, and the next day found the guy I suspected drinking a can of V. "Hey Simon where'd you get the V from?" "oh its mine I got it at the petrol station" he said evasively. I asked if I could look at the base of the can and there was my mark. Fuck you buddy.

He got fired a little later on for being a useless shmuck anyway so swings and roundabouts.

James, just playing Devil's Advocate here, but maybe you just forgot to put cheese on your sandwich before you came in?

I did wonder that at the time, but I checked and there were imprints (and crumbs) of the cheese in the margarine.

Maybe you were just about to take a bite out of your sandwich and the hot sales rep walked past and you got distracted and the cheese fell out.

So our employee promised to come in the afternoon for some client. Yesterday she emailed our other employee saying she'd probably couldn't make it and could she cancel it. She needed an answer RIGHT AWAY. Eh? First of, she should ask ME (or my mum), secondly like wtf. Today I asked her why she couldn't come. Is it rude of me to ask? I mean, shit, it's for something really important, then I could understand. She said:"Why should I give a reason?" in a rather rude way. She finally said she'd come anyway. WTF.

fire her

"Dear [single person out of several people working on project, others not CCed],

I was looking at [catalogue number of item in latest project] and noticed [different kind of catalogue number for completely unrelated item not in latest project]. Why is there [something which doesn't show up for me for either item, which would be nothing to do with me anyway]?"

Yeah, I'll... get right on that.

Sunny, didn't. :-) I quickly realized that it wasn't such a big deal. Thing is that our other employee is using this as a "look at me, ain't i so much better" through constant whining about it:"Wow, she's rude isn't she? I'd never do this! Very impolite." I was tempted ot make her STFU by telling her she's done "much worse" but what the hell, why get bothered by this?

otoh, it's great that you're not letting it get to you... but on the other, you're letting her know that it's ok to act that way. which means she'll push it a bit further the next time, and bit a further the next time. ppl like this - you give an inch, they take a mile.

dear coworker,

thank you for leaving shit til the last minute, then throwing it at me so that when i have to ask people for materials to complete said shit, i get yelled at for not giving them enough time. it's so very considerate of you.

t

On a quick misreading, I thought your co-workers were actually hurling shit at you, chimp-like.

My bf's got a new "look at my brass balls" female manager at his workplace who is tossing her orb about at everyone. She's been there a month; she's never been a manager before, and staff morale has plummetted in the time she's been around. Why? She thinks people doing so much as talking and making jokes while they work (key being THEY ARE WORKING) means they havent got enough to do.

Bf got pulled aside by her last week and given an official warning. Because he taps/drums on things a lot while he's waiting for print jobs to run/doing other stuff, and she thinks that means "you don't have enough to do". She was apparently speaking to him like a 5 year old being told off in class. Fucking cow. I'd have laughed in her face if it was me. He's just sat there and didnt say anything out of complete confusion. I want to go in there and slap her.

Do it!

I would if I didnt care if he got fired, haw.

But I mean wtf, you cant official-warn (thus potentially FIRE) someone for TAPPING ON A DESK. WTF.

This manager sounds completely out of her depth.

Yeah thats what I reckon.

Its like Homer saying "work harder!" to the guys at the Scorpio plant. Unfortunately bitches like her are the ones who go far, which is so unfair it makes me want to punch someone.

I'm still wondering about the soda-bomb

Hahah oh yes! Did it explode on the unsuspecting thief? Updates!

No, I don't think managers like her necessarily go far. I think she's just as likely to be found out. When people start quitting the owners/upper management/big bosses will almost definitely put two and two together.

I'm sure if an uptick of formal warnings from one person to a bunch of people who've previously been trouble-free at work is present, it will be notable...and noted. Go to HR, bandy the word 'inappropriate' around? If it's that sort of company.

trayce, i had a manager like her once. on top of her dickish work related behavior she used every chance possible to point our she was married to a football player and how my boyfriend at the time looked like a girl (ie he was in a band and had longish hair and zero meathead). eventually i had a meeting with her boss and got moved to another project (the best thing that has ever happened to me workwise). A few months later i heard her footballer left her and she had a nervous breakdown and got fired. im usually pretty empathetic but at that moment i was filled 100% proof glee.

justine you are right. but i am way better about it now. used to get totally worked up about it and let my emotions run with it. i think in her case it is lack of respect but also she is socially inept, she tends to come across as rude because she is actually shy. probably doesnt make sense.

Sunny: thats an awesome tale of schadenfreude! :) Yeah I dunno - I told the bf he should band together with all the pissed off staff and have a chat with the guy who *was* their manager (and is totally nice and on their side) but now hes been sideways-moted and she is his manager too, so I guess they all feel a bit powerless. The current economy doesn't help: you gotta suspect some companies are taking advantage of the downturn to use any excuse to sack people. Which leaves people in fear and kowtowing. It blows :(

soda bomb update: today marked a week since I put in the fridge, and I was starting to feel uneasy/remorseful and decided to take it out this morning, but when I went in there it was gone. I hadn't shaken it in a couple days so I have no idea if it 'sploded at all.

Need video cam installed stat.

Does anyone at your work look like this? It's a man injured in a serious soda bomb explosion which drove the cap into his forehead.
http://www.dryiceinfo.com/Pictures/dry%20ice%20bomb%20injury.jpg