i want to respond to each one individually
― my whole family is catholic so look at the pickle i'm in (zachlyon), Friday, 15 November 2013 01:06 (ten years ago) link
good guy/bad guy movie would be pretty rad
qr-coded microwavables sounds like the future
― j., Friday, 15 November 2013 01:15 (ten years ago) link
when do you microwave something on high, let it stand and then microwave it some more on medium?
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 01:21 (ten years ago) link
frozen lasagna, but i dunno maybe you don't let it stand any
― j., Friday, 15 November 2013 01:25 (ten years ago) link
No, you just rip off the plastic and go half-power.
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 01:46 (ten years ago) link
Listen, I've been a frozen food king since I was 17.
It's funny that you'll still see instructions that say "Rotate dinner one-half turn. Resume cooking for another 1-2 minutes."
Is there anyone (besides my 64-year-old mother) who still uses a microwave that doesn't have a rotating platter?
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 01:48 (ten years ago) link
me, because someone replaced my platter with one that doesn't match the rotator in my microwave, so it just sits there :(
― j., Friday, 15 November 2013 01:49 (ten years ago) link
I'm sorry to hear about your platter, but that just seems like an extraordinary circumstance.
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 01:59 (ten years ago) link
it's true, i don't follow the rotation instructions anyway
still, a microwave that scans your food for you, that's gold
― j., Friday, 15 November 2013 02:09 (ten years ago) link
I hate it when I forget to check the watts on the instructions cause I have a crazy powerful microwave and the instructions are usually for units that have 200-300 less watts. Usually I'm all "pfft, yeah right burrito! I'm gonna heat you for 3 minutes!? More like... 2...."YAAAAAAAAAA!
― Viceroy, Friday, 15 November 2013 02:14 (ten years ago) link
Microwaving food is not so difficult that we need QR CODES to make it work more efficiently.
I've never understood the secret codes you see on the inside of the door: POPCORN, CODE 1. SANDWICH, CODE 2. WARM APPLE CIDER, CODE 3. HOT APPLE CIDER, CODE 4.
How about SANDWICH, 30 SECONDS. If that doesn't work, then SANWICH, ANOTHER 30 SECONDS.
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 02:19 (ten years ago) link
Anyway. Maybe I need to get my gameboy out after reading that.
http://24.media.tumblr.com/ca7f46a31c1e2d3d5464af5ff90dcf92/tumblr_mw16wkAe8z1sustufo1_500.jpg
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 02:20 (ten years ago) link
All I can see in that picture is rainbow-coloured maggots
― cardamon, Friday, 15 November 2013 02:22 (ten years ago) link
I've thought of the two car horns one. Like when you're behind someone who doesn't notice the light's turned green, you can give them a pleasant "ding" instead of the agressive blast.
― nickn, Friday, 15 November 2013 07:24 (ten years ago) link
I suggested that to my wife when I learned to drive last year. It's annoying when you beep someone who's crossing the road in front of you without looking, so as not to kill them, and they give you the finger because to them the car horn always means "fuck you, idiot". I need sonic emoticons.
― Deafening silence (DL), Friday, 15 November 2013 12:46 (ten years ago) link
I'd also like one you can use when you're in a traffic jam that means: "I know the person in front of me has no power to move but I'm just letting off steam."
― Deafening silence (DL), Friday, 15 November 2013 12:47 (ten years ago) link
You guys need to learn better horn control. It's perfectly possible to give a tight, staccato beep that doesn't sound too aggressive.
― i wish i had a skateboard i could skate away on (Hurting 2), Friday, 15 November 2013 12:49 (ten years ago) link
you mean "emotihorns" xp
― gotta lol geir (NickB), Friday, 15 November 2013 12:49 (ten years ago) link
Hurting's got it. Boats and trains have been doing this for years.
Just don't do it too good. I was backing out of a tight space between two F-19000 Dodge 4x4 trucks and couldn't quite see the lane behind me. A somewhat friendly driver was pulling up out of my line of sight and tried to alert me by hitting the horn in that staccato beep.
Only thing was that her timing on the beat was nearly too perfect, and I kept going because I just thought it was a car alarm going off somewhere in the lot.
― pplains, Friday, 15 November 2013 13:08 (ten years ago) link
in fairness that also seems like an extraordinary circumstance
― Andrew Kornfan, Friday, 15 November 2013 13:40 (ten years ago) link
Just don't beep your horn unless it's an emergency! Some of us are trying to sleep...
― badgers moved the goalposts (dowd), Friday, 15 November 2013 14:22 (ten years ago) link
i find that a little beep!beep! is not difficult at all. some people just lay on it? savages!
― sweat pea (La Lechera), Friday, 15 November 2013 15:03 (ten years ago) link
can i get a beep! beep!?
― a strident purist when it comes to band-related shirts (Noodle Vague), Friday, 15 November 2013 15:04 (ten years ago) link
Beep beepWho walked in front of my jeep?
― Doctor Casino, Friday, 15 November 2013 15:45 (ten years ago) link
Speaking of, the other night I was coming home, going down a residential, poorly lit street that allows parking on both sides. There was a cab stopped alongside a bunch of parked cars, and the passenger flung the door open and stepped out of the cab on the street side instead of the curb side. I gave a quick, short "Beep!" to let her know PLEASE NOT TO WALK INTO TRAFFIC PLEASE AND ALSO THE CAB DOOR and she immediately flipped me off and started yelling obscenities. Like I'm the one who doesn't know to exit a cab on the goddamned curb side.
― Ian from Etobicoke (Phil D.), Friday, 15 November 2013 15:50 (ten years ago) link
flipping people off is almost instinctive now. I've seen people run folks out of their lanes in traffic due to not looking, then flipping off the person they ran out of their lane. it's like "you're making me feel bad by honking, and I don't like feeling bad, so FUCK YOU"
― Lesbian has fucking riffs for days (Neanderthal), Friday, 15 November 2013 17:09 (ten years ago) link
the fuck?
http://img62.imageshack.us/img62/9441/w4gi.jpg
― Lesbian has fucking riffs for days (Neanderthal), Friday, 15 November 2013 23:27 (ten years ago) link
never apologize for anythingn
― Ornate Coleman (Moodles), Friday, 15 November 2013 23:30 (ten years ago) link
maybe if that plate had told me I looked pretty every once in a while this wouldn'tve happened
― Lesbian has fucking riffs for days (Neanderthal), Friday, 15 November 2013 23:31 (ten years ago) link
Grab a plate and throw it on the ground
- Okay, done
Did it break?
- No, it was made out of a cardboard takeaway box
Do you understand?
― gotta lol geir (NickB), Friday, 15 November 2013 23:51 (ten years ago) link
Did it go back to the way it was before?-No
Do you understand?- No but I think you are a person who doesn't understand apologies.
*breaks all your plates, puts on sunglasses*
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 16 November 2013 02:16 (ten years ago) link
lol
― mario chalmers of ilx (Sufjan Grafton), Saturday, 16 November 2013 02:19 (ten years ago) link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BDJyF6g2Cw
― tɹi.ʃɪp (Treeship), Saturday, 16 November 2013 02:27 (ten years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/f4n6AYc.png
― My god. Pure ideology. (ey), Sunday, 17 November 2013 21:31 (ten years ago) link
hahahaha with the beard-braid, this is just too perfect.
― Viceroy, Sunday, 17 November 2013 21:55 (ten years ago) link
someone just reposted chuck pahalanukahk posting a link to "the most literary scifi novels" and i don't know why i don't delete my account anymore
― my whole family is catholic so look at the pickle i'm in (zachlyon), Sunday, 17 November 2013 22:01 (ten years ago) link
...but instead braids and beards
― lag∞n, Sunday, 17 November 2013 22:56 (ten years ago) link
kinda want to bayonet him just for laughs
― set the controls for the heart of the sun (VegemiteGrrl), Monday, 18 November 2013 00:36 (ten years ago) link
He's got soul, but he's not a soldier
― In times of osterity, these Eton-educated poshboys (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 18 November 2013 10:40 (ten years ago) link
No wait... he doesn't believe in the concept of a soul, but he's a soldier
― In times of osterity, these Eton-educated poshboys (Bananaman Begins), Monday, 18 November 2013 10:41 (ten years ago) link
probably all over facebook too but lots of people earnestly retweeting fake tube signs today:
http://tubesign.herokuapp.com/
― but my heart is full of woah (NickB), Monday, 18 November 2013 12:20 (ten years ago) link
just got a share from lifehack dot org that is "13 things mentally strong people don't do" that had been forwarded by three different people. are we currently at a state in language-based media where this is what passes for valuable information?
― sweat pea (La Lechera), Monday, 18 November 2013 14:21 (ten years ago) link
1. read or write didactic listicles
2. hack their lives
― thus spake darraghthustra (Noodle Vague), Monday, 18 November 2013 14:46 (ten years ago) link
3. banksy that shit
― lag∞n, Monday, 18 November 2013 14:48 (ten years ago) link
https://scontent-b-lhr.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ash3/1459779_10151856619696051_1479733416_n.jpg
― I like to think I have learnt a thing or two about music (Neil S), Wednesday, 20 November 2013 13:24 (ten years ago) link
And what's more...
― Mark G, Wednesday, 20 November 2013 13:38 (ten years ago) link
I'm just surprised 4bn of the world's population can read English.
― I like to think I have learnt a thing or two about music (Neil S), Wednesday, 20 November 2013 14:14 (ten years ago) link
and not just English, but passive aggressive Facebook macro English