LOLZ in the Conference Room; I'd Like to EXCELSIOR some of that

alex in manhattan gets the haimlich maneuver

amazing

unhaimlich!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so pretty

that was great

eh 50 mins shy of snappy and it bites an earlier effort but thanks

so considerate

wins tryin to be keep a level head in postgame interview after ridiculous dunk

be

I am still amazed at that pun

Good morning buglers with that pun

Just missing a groan from Oliver

kim dotcom i love you

― goole, Thursday, January 30, 2014 11:29 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

but you're bringing me downloads

― the Norwegians are leaving! (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, January 30, 2014 1:15 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

clearly I need to go to wins' pun boot camp and get fit

well played there

I came across this golden oldie while reading up in the New Mexico thread:

The national forest west of town (NB: Las Vegas, NM) has some decent hiking and scenery, and in town there was a pretty good breakfast spot (think it was Charlie's Cafe. BUT I needed to pick up contact solution or something, and the route my GPS gave me took me through a residential area...drove past this methed out looking guy who maniacally screamed I'M GONNNNNNNA KILLLLLLLL YOUUUUUUUUUU. Then got to the Walgreens and had to fend of foul-smelling psychotic old man who wanted...something. I think it was flabbity gleebity slocumton.

― hope this helps (Granny Dainger), Saturday, May 1, 2010

They usually keep that next to the cotton balls.

― Nom Nom Nom Chomsky (WmC), Saturday, May 1, 2010

how many years before ronan farrow and tavi gevinson meet and give birth to zuul

― da croupier, Wednesday, October 16, 2013 5:04 PM (3 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ronan farrow is hella gay so they'd probably have to adopt zuul

artificial insemination is a thing, even for zuul

http://static1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120329171641/ghostbusters/images/9/99/Zuulterrordog.png

doesn't resemble either of them

let's fact check this joke some more, that always makes anything funnier

does fact checking jokes make them funnier tho, not so sure

did you hear the one about the fact checker

he checked his coat

Speaking of fact checking that joke I'm surprised nobody's called out that I should have said Gozer instead of Zuul.

I was too distracted by the inconsequentiality to notice.

kneel before zuul! ha ha right

my good friend from high school is wrapping up his five year prison sentence this month for collusion. He was also fined $8MM.

― Pale Smiley Face (dandydonweiner), Monday, February 3, 2014 4:22 PM (4 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

where will he get the millimeters

― hang son doong (am0n)

http://www.dvdmg.com/8mm.jpg

I haven't seen this yet but according to the New Yorker, Jonah hill got into character by prank calling best buys for hours

― puff puff post (uh oh I'm having a fantasy), Saturday, February 1, 2014 8:27 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

the adam sandler school of acting, jonahs a trailblazer

― johnny crunch, Sunday, February 2, 2014 2:42 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

wouldn't adam sandler be the trailblazer in that scenario

― socki (s1ocki), Sunday, February 2, 2014 2:43 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

that's how pacino prepared for glengarry glen ross iirc

― balls, Sunday, February 2, 2014 2:47 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

wouldn't adam sandler be the trailblazer in that scenario

― socki (s1ocki), Sunday, February 2, 2014 2:43 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

reposting this one cos hardlol

from politics thread, re: Christie

Sure. Anyone vindictive enough to approve of the lane-closing scheme in the first place will certainly be shameless enough to brazenly outface the people who point out his lies and manipulations. Nothing's going to pry the truth from him or get him to resign power, except perhaps a painful arm-twisting from a source he accepts is more powerful than he is.

― Aimless, Monday, 3 February 2014 19:17 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i don't see Springsteen doing that

― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Monday, 3 February 2014 19:18 (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

hey i think we shd give the benefit of the doubt to this mysterious stranger who has exactly the same interests and writing style as Herman

― regret it? nope, said it? yep (Noodle Vague), Sunday, February 2, 2014 12:27 AM (2 days ago)

entire deafheaven thread is vintage ILM

agree

whos herman

algerian pollkeeper

a little pagoda penis?

damn.

Anyone have a quick reputable link to a story with which I can refute my reporter friend's contention that Allen can't be a pedophile because (a) Farrow is the only accuser (b) pedophiles have patterns of behavior?

― Bryan Fairy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 4:23 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

yes, it really is so bad, you dense and hateful drama queen.

― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 9:18 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i'd like to stab a couple of you fuckers through the heart

― images of war violence and historical smoking (Dr Morbius), Sunday, February 2, 2014 12:19 AM (2 days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

― da croupier, Tuesday, February 4, 2014 4:25 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

will try that, thanks!

― Bryan Fairy (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 4:28 PM (1 hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

why is woody allen never also accused of compulsive child-collecting, he has adopted four to mia's nine and also acquired and quarantined one of hers.

― estela, Tuesday, February 4, 2014 10:57 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

thats going to be a super fucking dark episode of "Hoarders" when they get around to it

― Corpsepaint Counterpaint (jjjusten), Wednesday, February 5, 2014 12:10 AM (17 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"You wanna be a black metal fan? You can't just go buy any album...it's scientific. You gotta buy this...Filosofem...it's the departure point. Listen to it every night around dusk for a month."

― so so defheaven (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 11:28 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"But listen...there's a burden that every real black metal fan's gotta live with, that's the fact that Mayhem, the greatest black metal band of all time, is never gonna play again. You can't live in the past, man"

― so so defheaven (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 11:29 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

"Here, take this....it's a Hellhammer cassette, one of the last in existence. I want you to steal a car, get it in and drive west. Play the tape full blast, when the tape ends, get out and get into a fight."

― so so defheaven (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 11:31 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

Hahaha awesome

hahaha

http://ca.rockworldeast.com/dimage/zoom/8520.jpg

Guy was wearing this at the grocery store today

― francisF, Tuesday, February 4, 2014 8:28 PM (14 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

why was he at the grocery store?

― The Wisdom of Gafflers (JoeStork), Tuesday, February 4, 2014 8:30 PM (11 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dumb but lol

He was at the grocery store, not the pussy store

― mh, Tuesday, February 4, 2014 7:51 PM (3 hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Also I'm having a pretty hard day. I had just bought this big ice cream cone and, just as I was about to have some, it fell off the cone and onto the ground before I could lick, balls then asked that question, so I was pretty ornery in my response. I'm sorry

― 龜, Wednesday, February 5, 2014 10:28 AM (7 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

this post has the most important comma of all time

― scott c-word (some dude)