Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

My deepest sympathies.

I just went through a print guy who downloaded smaller photos from the internet, blew them up for the magazine and then sent them back to me for online publishing -- still all blown up.

In other words, he took a 300px x 400px mugshot, blew it up to 720x960 or whatever to make a square-inch mug in the book and then sent it to me still all blurry and pixelated when I could've used the original art he downloaded in the first place.

Veg is your ex-boss defenestrated yet

how do you even shoot at 640x480???

I just went through a print guy who downloaded smaller photos from the internet, blew them up for the magazine and then sent them back to me for online publishing -- still all blown up.

haha, I think I've worked with that guy or his cousin.

I think this photographer understands she has a learning curve to climb, because it took three weeks of me asking before she would admit that she shoots at 640x480. I mentioned the name of the best show/livestock photographer in California and the fact that she sends me 2100 x 1500 images -- maybe she'll get the message.

xp lol -- my first digital camera would shoot at that resolution, but I've never checked to see how low our current camera will go.

xpost lol not yet sic, getting close

tryin to explain to someone that, ironically enough, the fact that they haven't bothered to learn how to do any of the complicated daily reports is the very reason they'll be doing them alone all the rest of the week while everyone else gets to go on the type of training that would only be wasted on eh lazing whingers. how to phrase, how to phrase.

how do you even shoot at 640x480???

gonna offer this guy a super-sweet deal on a Fujifilm camera

it's a little bulky, only has drivers for Windows 3.1 and 95, and the battery compartment cover fell off 15 years ago, but apart from that it's perfect for his needs

how to phrase, how to phrase

I believe the phrase you are searching for is "get your shit together"

it's not, tbh, because i dont give two fucks if their shit is together or not rly, it wasn't that type of conversation

wait a minute he's been at soton 6 years?!

Dude today asked how he could reset a customer's password if he didn't know his password.

I can do that?

currently hiding round the corner from a cafe because seen dreadful colleague go in there. this is happening.

(details of dreadfulness include getting non-directionally angry to deflect from things that are his responsibility, claims he's naturally good at languages if he put in the effort, one-upmanship regarding the great weariness he feels at having to travel constantly despite his transparent glee at the whole process, constantly checking emails in meetings then when he looks up blankly at a question that he needs to answer says "sorry I was multi-tasking")

right, that shd be enough time.

Second last day of Heather before I finish here!

I have more or less tuned her out - she could be telling me the building was on fire and I'd probably burn tbh - but a couple of notable things today:

20 minutes commenting on how bad a woman from upstairs looked in a lab coat, before saying that the woman's real problem was working in an office full of women and how that had turned her into a bitch, and that was why she (Heather) was glad she worked in an office full of men because it stopped her from even picking the slightest fault in anything.

Telling a story about something that happened yesterday which she thought was funny and laughed at longer and louder than anyone else at the time (which was also something bitchy involving a different woman). "But you didn't see what happened Heather?" "Yes, but everyone else was laughing so I thought I would too."

Spent ages on the phone to a hotel making a booking for four people in a couple of weeks time. Then read out the names to then and gave them 5 names. Which was one more than the number of rooms they had. Making it their fault, obviously. "You wouldn't believe something as little as that could make a difference, could you. I just don't see why they couldn't have done what I asked."

I brought in a cake yesterday as it was my last week. About 3/4 of it went yesterday, and when the cleaners came in they moved it from the table to the chair next to it. Someone was going to have another bit today, and I made a comment about the cleaners moving it about (as I had also noticed the tin was the wrong way up). "How did you know it had been on the floor?" said Heather, and it turned out the cleaners had knocked it over and out of the tin last night when Heather was the only one left in the office. Another co-worker came in and Heather then insisted he have a bit of cake. I couldn't keep the information from him, so told him about the cleaner. A third chap then asked whether "the people who knew" would have let him eat it without telling him. I pointed out that was a very diplomatic way of referring to Heather, since she was the only one that knew, which offended her. She then said she wouldn't have let him without telling him, so I pointed out that she was encouraging worker #2 to eat it therefore she obviously preferred worker #2 to worker #3, and was it that she liked one more or that she didn't like worker #3 at all. This offended her too (but fuck it, I won't see her again after tomorrow).

but fuck it, I won't see her again after tomorrow

I finished at a job last week, and I very nearly told the guy with crucifying BO (it actually made my eyes water to be withing two metres of him) to take a shower and use deodorant. But I'm English so I didn't.

tbf that would be a hard conversation for an American to have with a coworker, too.

At my last job, there were a couple of really smelly people, including one dude who on his worst days would come in wearing dirty clothes that smelled like they had been balled up wet in a dark corner of a dank basement with an overlay of that rotten meat smell that some really heavy smokers give off. Anyway, the people who had to work in a small, windowless space with him handled it by hanging air fresheners around his desk when he was at lunch. :(

He was a nice dude, and really funny. He just had some issues with self care and frankly, someone in a position of authority should have stepped in and told him he needed to wear clean clothes to work but that would have required someone in a position of authority to act like they were in a position of authority and that wouldn't happen.

Oh man there was another coworker there, also very nice, but just disgusting with horrible BO and a tendency to wear polyester pants which, not to get too graphic, but polyester can hold some serious body funk even if you do wash it regularly and there was no indication that this woman did. Anyway, like I said she was super nice and LOVED TO HUG PEOPLE including me and it was pretty terrible.

My entire office smells of cabbage and burnt rubber and I'm not sure why.

Co-workers who hug you are the worst. GO AWAY.

I sat here and thought about that today. I think I've had one co-worker hug me in the past 18 years of office work. It was at his son's funeral.

I haven't been hugging anyone.

o man ~15 years ago i worked (a retail job!) with a woman who had srs odor issues. i think she just never ever washed her hair?

she ultimately had to be spoken to, and i was glad to be insufficiently senior enough to have to do it

i did have to tell a few homeless dudes that they had to leave because they smelled too bad, tho

Not stupid and i like this person but ugh. Been working on a project split between two depts since Nov and its finally wimding down. It got delayed a month only due to the other depts fuckups...which negatively impacted everyone in my dept including me.

My dept had the smaller part of the proj but my team assisted with development for things that assisted both groups. Proj goes live, my depts goes off without a hitch (whereas the others is a mess).

Naturally we're starting to make transition plans cos we all have other projects that need our attention which werent helped by pushing back a month...and i get asked by one of the mgrs to stay aligned for the whole month cos 'theyre too busy' to take on the small tasks we need them to take over.

Nevermind that we delivered our side with few flaws and in a position where they can easily step in. We are penalized cos they are a mess, even tho we as individuals are no less busy than they are?

Fuuuck that

Also someone farted at work today

Someone farts at work every day. You just happened to notice today.

^^^

it was you Neanderthal, wasn't it

well the good news is that as a civil servant I can tell them to go fuck themselves without any retribution more serious than them moving me to a different team.

so I did.

― dn/ac (darraghmac), Thursday, 12 June 2014 16:37 (2 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

they just offered me acting role leading the new team, completely moronic choice ahead of a guy already here and more capable ffs.

lol

on a week's PTO this week but you wouldn't know it given how many times I keep logging in (once was for an expense report tho). Unfortunately managed to see my inbox and couldn't stop myself from looking. The one project team I have that doesn't go live for 4.5 months and has barely chirped at me in weeks is suddenly emailing the hell out of me. Even though I warned them about my PTO, they're emailing me like hawks. Of course, given my anxiety/tendency to harp on things, I decided just to reply to them now and get em over with, whilst reminding them that I'd be back next week (which, y'know, shoulda been a clue given my out of office message which on Outlook 2010 prominently displays at the top before you even hit 'send' on an email).

No more logons. everything else can wait. so glad I gave none of these fuckers my number.

told boss im turning it down, ah well i'll regret that in the morning

Even though I warned them about my PTO, they're emailing me like hawks

sure

xp you sure the other person wants it? sometimes people just want to stay put.

he snapped their hand off. round of promotions announced today ppl treating me with kid gloves I kinda think I should act more annoyed cos I've been asked to keep it under wraps but lol offices huh

i did not participate in my workplace's 'ice bucket challenge'

The problem I have with those type of workplace charity participation events is that it reduces the problem itself—ALS research donations?—to the level of a meme. Sure, money gets raised, but I take my charity with a bit more solemnity thank you very much. That movember thing, my god, stop talking about it. I'm injecting a mixture of bleach and airplane glue into my own prostate just to MAKE IT STOP.

Still gonna need a bucket then.

finally figured out why one of the only decent people i've worked with at my job mysteriously disappeared. apparently she had been turned into the department scapegoat and people up there were tormenting her, led by her boss. which is bullshit because she was the nicest, hardest working person i've met here and we both initiated all sorts of projects together to make our departments run better. apparently she left one day crying, disappeared for a month for "illness", then quit.

this happened around the same time things got seriously fucked up for me in my department with a majority of my co-workers turning on me and saying some of the most fucked up things anyone's ever said to me, led by my manager. it's like this place was doing some kind-of blood purge or something. i thought i was going crazy. and this is one of the biggest corporations in the US. there are some seriously screwed up places to work out there.

Arrrrgh you have an OFFICE with a DOOR, youre the only one here who DOES, can you please USE THE DOOR AND CLOSE IT WHEN YOURE ON THE PHONE, I dont care about PBX settings and I have to sit right by you.

+ ∞

some people sure like to wash dishes in the office kitchen sink, FORFUCKINGEVER

hey at least they wash them! If I find one more grotty coffee cup/spoon piled up in the sink ....

This is more of a stupid workplace thing.

Love my job. Happy with who I work with. I'm walking out of the office tonight and see a cardboard box leaning against a beam in our editorial department. A 42" monitor says the label.

Oh cool, I say. You guys getting a TV?

Yeah, says one of the senior editors. Sort of. It's going to display our Google Analytics in real time.

Ha Ha, I say. No really. Are we going to keep it on Fox or Al-Jazeera?

No really, says the editor. He sighs - it's going to display our Google Analytics in real time.

What in THE fuck.

Last year during an office remodel, they put IPADS outside all of the conference rooms so we could book times to meet.

Know how hard it is to use an iPad that's attached to a wall at a 90º angle, four feet off the ground?

Are there enough things going on in realtime googanals (lol) to even want to see them on a screen!?

NO.

surely there's going to be more to it. still, even if it was on the weather channel all day long, seems like a waste of 42 inches.

highlights of all your failings, with commentary from skip bayless

Roofcam of blank skyline.

oo look a bird just flew past.

a 42" monitor is £300 quid these days, a day's wages for some people.

using ipads to do the same job as post-it notes though, that annoys me...

Other People's Fuckups, man.

Did just get to write email asking

"How can we provide assistance in correcting your implementation of these rules?"

which i'm pretty proud of as a corporatese knife twister