Star Wars 7 shit talk

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Emergency cutting open of Tauntaun bellies is permissible.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Thursday, 4 December 2014 19:30 (nine years ago) link

A Mofference was a secret conference held by the Imperial Central Committee of Grand Moffs in the secluded Mofference room of their Moffship.
Come on now.
― ledge, Thursday, December 4, 2014 4:52 PM (2 hours ago)

Emperor: Boba Fett in the mofference room.
Darth: Yeah, I'd like to suck on some of that!
Emperor: o_O
<Darth goes to conference room, sees it's Jango Fett not Boba>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWaLxFIVX1s

a stupid red mute juggalo (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 4 December 2014 19:54 (nine years ago) link

"Mofference" might be the stupidest Star Wars-related thing I've ever heard.

Today, anyway.

Hamhole and Fly Eyes (Old Lunch), Thursday, 4 December 2014 19:59 (nine years ago) link

force-sensitive is up there, for today

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Thursday, 4 December 2014 19:59 (nine years ago) link

"Silence! I call this Dartherence to order!"

Hamhole and Fly Eyes (Old Lunch), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:00 (nine years ago) link

Mofference vs. Sithcon

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:01 (nine years ago) link

read that as sithcoin first

Nixon head is essential. (stevie), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:04 (nine years ago) link

Darth is such a moff-diver...

schwantz, Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:12 (nine years ago) link

you aren't being very force-sensitive with those slurs

Evan, Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:13 (nine years ago) link

re the nature of performances in SW, Pauline Kael in '77:

Lucas has got the tone of bad movies down pat: you never catch the actors deliberately acting badly; they just seem to be bad actors, on contract to Monogram or Republic, their klunky enthusiasm polished at the Ricky Nelson school of acting. In a gesture toward equality of the sexes, the high-school-cheerleader princess-in-distress (played by Carrie Fisher) talks tomboy-tough--Terry Moore with spunk. (Is it because the picture is synthesized from the mythology of serials and old comic books that it didn't occur to anybody that she could get the Force?)

things lose meaning over time (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:33 (nine years ago) link

good conference room gag by forks, first solid entry in the form in a while

Doctor Casino, Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:36 (nine years ago) link

Kael being force-sensitive.

jmm, Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:36 (nine years ago) link

i could watch movies for the rest of my life not knowing what pauline kael thought of them and be perfectly happy about it

(The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:37 (nine years ago) link

iirc she returns to that can-Leia-use-the-Force thing in her ROTJ review.

She's not wrong, J.D. Those Republic motion pictures were fun.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:38 (nine years ago) link

Kael sounds like the least fun person ever

18th Century Celebrity WS of Shame (Hurting 2), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:38 (nine years ago) link

I posted her review of Empire yesterday – she loved it.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:40 (nine years ago) link

tbh I don't think I would've loved SW either if I hadn't seen Empire first.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:40 (nine years ago) link

Yes, she liked the second movie a lot more.

You do realize that Star Wars (1977) was modeled on crap movies, right?

btw here's the rest of her capsule review:

One of the biggest box-office successes in movie history--probably because for young audiences it's like getting a box of Cracker Jack that is all prizes. Written and directed by George Lucas, the film is enjoyable in its own terms, but it's exhausting, too: like taking a pack of kids to the circus. There's no breather in the picture, no lyricism; the only attempt at beauty is in the image of a double sunset. The loudness, the smash-and-grab editing, and the relentless pacing drive every idea from your head, and even if you've been entertained, you may feel cheated of some dimension--a sense of wonder, perhaps. It's an epic without a dream. Maybe the only real inspiration involved was to set its sci-fi galaxy in the pop-culture past, and to turn old-movie ineptness into conscious Pop Art. And maybe there's a touch of genius in keeping the film so consistently what it is, even if this is the genius of the plodding.

things lose meaning over time (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:43 (nine years ago) link

she's not really wrong, but i do find her constant barrage of 'you feel this,' 'you think that,' 'you feel cheated,' etc. exhausting.

(The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:47 (nine years ago) link

she is not the critic you are looking for

things lose meaning over time (Dr Morbius), Thursday, 4 December 2014 20:50 (nine years ago) link

the only attempt at beauty is in the image of a double sunset.

ah, but what a double sunset.

Nixon head is essential. (stevie), Thursday, 4 December 2014 22:01 (nine years ago) link

all the way across the sky!

Evan, Thursday, 4 December 2014 22:35 (nine years ago) link

can we discuss how awesome this sounds:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2aMudiylPiw

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 4 December 2014 22:48 (nine years ago) link

would be funny if everyone in starwars figured out how to use the Force. It would be like scanners.

Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:05 (nine years ago) link

It must be so frustrating when it's your 21st birthday and you haven't even felt the tip of the Force.

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:06 (nine years ago) link

And what was the deal with that protrusion on the end of the lightsabers?

pilot light. these existed on the real lightsabers but were matted out onscreen.

the incredible string gland (sic), Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:16 (nine years ago) link

And what was the deal with that protrusion on the end of the lightsabers?

even a long long time ago in a galaxy far, far away they argue about circumcision.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:18 (nine years ago) link

http://popmech.tumblr.com/post/100945828153 was this posted itt? it pretty much has destroyed everything for me

http://41.media.tumblr.com/82a4e6ce13b067a25413ea041655709e/tumblr_nd6y33G9F01s2wio8o6_1280.jpg

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:50 (nine years ago) link

my childhood is dead :( it was only 26

i seriously never actually considered any sort of thought about how the big space battles were filmed

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:52 (nine years ago) link

that just makes it cooler

Number None, Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:55 (nine years ago) link

just some dudes in a parking lot weaving sci-fi dreams

Number None, Thursday, 4 December 2014 23:56 (nine years ago) link

gonna rewatch ANH and keep an eye out for the beige pickup truck

linda cardellini (zachlyon), Friday, 5 December 2014 00:01 (nine years ago) link

I love that. Those ship models above too. Model effects will always be way cooler than CG.

jmm, Friday, 5 December 2014 00:12 (nine years ago) link

CG can work better for creatures if tastefully done, but buildings and vehicles should always be models.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Friday, 5 December 2014 00:22 (nine years ago) link

Yeah seeing the models just confirms how much great craftmanship really went into those films.

Not saying there's no skill in cgi work, just that endless amounts of beardies making cool huge detailed models is way more epic.

Recently watched the Bladerunner making of, and how they created the long view of the city. Utterly mind blowing.

Drop soap, not bombs (Ste), Friday, 5 December 2014 00:39 (nine years ago) link

Recently watched the Bladerunner making of, and how they created the long view of the city. Utterly mind blowing.

Same here--all those bits of photo-etched metal, and a Millennium Falcon model stuck in sideways to be a building, and millions of little greebly bits for texture. Lovely. I wish I had a job doing that.

ornamental cabbage (James Morrison), Friday, 5 December 2014 00:44 (nine years ago) link

i'm cool with all buildings being google sketchup models as long as jim henson productions makes all monsters out of felt.

Philip Nunez, Friday, 5 December 2014 00:44 (nine years ago) link

that Blade Runner doc is like one long eulogy for the art of practical effects

Number None, Friday, 5 December 2014 00:45 (nine years ago) link

Did Kael hate "Blade Runner"? What an old crab.

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Friday, 5 December 2014 00:51 (nine years ago) link

I know it blew my mind years ago when I learned that it was not the ships flying fast but the camera moving past the models.

Josh in Chicago, Friday, 5 December 2014 01:08 (nine years ago) link

Guys... the Moffship thing let me to this:

Trioculus was a three-eyed mutant warlord of the Galactic Empire who declared himself Emperor a year after the Battle of Endor. As a figurehead of the Central Committee of Grand Moffs, led by his mentor Bertroff Hissa, Trioculus took control of the remnants of the Empire in opposition to Ysanne Isard.

The self-proclaimed son of Palpatine, Trioculus was in actuality a pretender to the throne, usurping the role of Palpatine's true son, three-eyed mutant Triclops. Spurred on by a prophecy of Rajah Ubooki, the false Kadann, he sought the glove of Darth Vader to establish his legitimacy. Trioculus's pursuit of the Jedi Prince Ken and his infatuation with Leia Organa pitted him against rival Zorba Desilijic Tiure, and led to him being taken captive by the Hutt and frozen in carbonite. Trioculus was eventually betrayed by Kadann, who sought the Imperial throne himself, and in the end was assassinated by a New Republic droid.

My brain just starts shutting down when there are so many linked things I've never heard of. And then I start clicking links...

Pooja Bhatt's erotic thriller Jism 2 (GOTT PUNCH II HAWKWINDZ), Friday, 5 December 2014 01:13 (nine years ago) link

Did Kael hate "Blade Runner"? What an old crab.

― Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee),

I don't know but Blade Runner sucks. I understand its reputation: art direction, atmosphere, etc. The story and acting are crap.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 5 December 2014 01:16 (nine years ago) link

Yep. I've always wished that movie was more engaging, because I love everything about its looks.

jmm, Friday, 5 December 2014 01:20 (nine years ago) link

where does blade runner rank on acting/story on the PKD adaptations?

Philip Nunez, Friday, 5 December 2014 01:30 (nine years ago) link

Gotta be #1 on both counts, but I'm a blade runner stan

ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Karl Malone), Friday, 5 December 2014 01:33 (nine years ago) link

i'm just picturing schwarzenegger and ford swapping PKD roles.

"You've been voight-kampfed!"

Philip Nunez, Friday, 5 December 2014 01:37 (nine years ago) link

I've watched Blade Runner at least five times now and can't remember a thing about it, I just stop caring halfway through or something.

joygoat, Friday, 5 December 2014 01:41 (nine years ago) link

no actor sounds cool saying "Sushi. That's what my ex-wife called me - cold fish. "

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 5 December 2014 01:42 (nine years ago) link

sometimes I think it'd help if actors in movies stopped and asked, "Hey if we were posting this conversation to an ilx messageboard thread right now, would we be FP'd?"

$0.00 Butter sauce only. No marinara. (Sufjan Grafton), Friday, 5 December 2014 01:44 (nine years ago) link

Shaking my head in disbelief at "Blade Runner sucks." It's a beaten down soulless future LA, guys!! And Rutger Hauer is excellent. Crazy talk.

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Friday, 5 December 2014 01:48 (nine years ago) link


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