Do I dare
Do I dare read Gruber's review of the APPLE WATCH
― 龜, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 15:31 (nine years ago) link
5490 words including footnotes
― bizarro gazzara, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 15:46 (nine years ago) link
the verges is comically long and strange too
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 15:54 (nine years ago) link
How many of these reviews feel like writers trying to convince themselves that the product is good and not bad
― 龜, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 15:55 (nine years ago) link
NB I haven't read any of them but I imagine it is all of the reviews
You’re 16. You’re in school. You’re sitting in class. You have a crush on another student — you’ve fallen hard. You can’t stop thinking about them. You suspect the feelings are mutual — but you don’t know. You’re afraid to just come right out and ask, verbally — afraid of the crushing weight of rejection. But you both wear an Apple Watch. So you take a flyer and send a few taps. And you wait. Nothing in response. Dammit. Why are you so stupid? Whoa — a few taps are sent in return, along with a hand-drawn smiley face. You send more taps. You receive more taps back. This is it. You send your heartbeat. It is racing, thumping. Your crush sends their heartbeat back.You’re flirting. Not through words. Not through speech. Physically flirting, by touch. And you’re not even in the same classroom. Maybe you don’t even go to the same school.
You’re flirting. Not through words. Not through speech. Physically flirting, by touch. And you’re not even in the same classroom. Maybe you don’t even go to the same school.
i feel like people are going to be using their watches to send crude drawings of dongs to each other 95% of the time
― bizarro gazzara, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 15:57 (nine years ago) link
龜Posted: April 8, 2015 at 11:55:14 AMHow many of these reviews feel like writers trying to convince themselves that the product is good and not bad
the verges (only skimmed) seems to be trying to make the argument that its simultaneously bad and amazing
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:06 (nine years ago) link
is there a cockring version of the watch band
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:07 (nine years ago) link
you're 16. you're at home. you have no friends. it's midnight. for some reason you have two apple watches. you put them both on and start tapping
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:07 (nine years ago) link
xpost lol
you're 16. you're at home. you have no friends. it's midnight. for some reason you have two apple watches. you put them both on and start tfapping
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, April 8, 2015 12:07 PM (2 seconds ago) Bookmark
― 龜, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:07 (nine years ago) link
FTFY
I feel like there are lots of real cool things that can be done with it and these writers are brainstorming so they can look visionary if any of these things stick
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:08 (nine years ago) link
Literally the only use I can think of for this thing now is measuring your fap speed
― 龜, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:08 (nine years ago) link
There's a really cool book "authored" by Bill Gates from 1995 or so where there's only passing references made to the usefulness of the internet and they had to print a second edition a year later with all these internet predictions, then they claim it was all in the original book
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:09 (nine years ago) link
theres a thinkpiece to be written abt how visionary brainstorming has nothing at all to do with how actual innovation happens
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:11 (nine years ago) link
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Road_Ahead_%28Bill_Gates_book%29#Content_differences_between_hardback_and_trade_editions
I guess what I'm saying is to aim a little high, you will at least make it on to lists of silliest predictions or w/e and not "this guy reiterated for the millionth time how cool encyclopedias on CD-ROM are"
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:11 (nine years ago) link
something to be said about how science fiction writers write about the now but with subtle differences and they're more right than visionaries who think up stupid crap
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:13 (nine years ago) link
doubt the hit rate is too high for either
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:14 (nine years ago) link
yeah, but science fiction doesn't claim predictive powers, they just gloat when that happens to happen
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:15 (nine years ago) link
i mean predicting the future is hard, making small improvements to existing technology in ways that actually help ppl is also hard but in the doing actual work sort of way
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:15 (nine years ago) link
http://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2014/02/back-to-the-future-dusting-off-bill-gates-the-road-ahead/
Wallet PCs with the proper equipment will be able to tell you where you are anyplace on the face of the Earth. GPS receivers…will be built into many wallet PCs. The wallet PC will connect you to the information highway while you travel a real highway and tell you where you are. Its built-in speaker will be able to dictate directions to you to let you know that a freeway exit is coming up or that the next intersection has frequent accidents. It will monitor digital traffic reports and warn you that you’d better leave for the airport early or suggest an alternate route…Some wallet PCs will be simple and elegant and offer only the essentials such as a small screen, a microphone, a secure way to transact business with digital money, and the capability to read or otherwise use basic information. Others will bristle with all kinds of gadgets, including cameras, scanners that will be able to read printed text or handwriting, and receivers with the global-positioning capability. Most will have a panic button for you to press when you need emergency help. Some models will include thermometers, barometers, altimeters, and heart-rate sensors. Prices will vary accordingly, but generally wallet PCs will be priced about the way cameras are today…
Some wallet PCs will be simple and elegant and offer only the essentials such as a small screen, a microphone, a secure way to transact business with digital money, and the capability to read or otherwise use basic information. Others will bristle with all kinds of gadgets, including cameras, scanners that will be able to read printed text or handwriting, and receivers with the global-positioning capability. Most will have a panic button for you to press when you need emergency help. Some models will include thermometers, barometers, altimeters, and heart-rate sensors. Prices will vary accordingly, but generally wallet PCs will be priced about the way cameras are today…
hey look bill g. basically outlined the iPhone and Apple Watch functionality in 1995, with the emphasis on all the wrong parts and no extensibility
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:22 (nine years ago) link
― lag∞n, Wednesday, April 8, 2015 12:06 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
did you catch the part where he acts like a dick to the person he's getting drinks with b/c he keeps checking the watch
― call all destroyer, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:25 (nine years ago) link
lol no, classic
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:25 (nine years ago) link
i love how one of the arguments for this device is that its "less intrusive"
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:26 (nine years ago) link
if you have tried to use google maps when walking through an actual city that might be a thing, looking at your watch when it buzzes to see it says "turn right" instead of pulling out yr phone or holding it in front of you is a pretty big diff
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:28 (nine years ago) link
not exactly a killer app
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:29 (nine years ago) link
if it keeps you from getting hit by a taxi when you pull out yr phone it might be a... saviour app
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:31 (nine years ago) link
the iwatch is my little angel
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:33 (nine years ago) link
I should do another week test run of the pebble, it was one of those things where it was just on the verge of being useful enough to use all the time, but not quite there due to form factor
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:35 (nine years ago) link
I have coworkers who are like the biggest nerds imaginable and they have those motorola smart watches and shit, I should see if they still use them
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:37 (nine years ago) link
one of the weird things abt this is how its trying so hard to be fashion, like who is it for, obvs generally apples market is anyone who can afford their devices, but this idk
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:42 (nine years ago) link
feel like johnny ive/apple is very much believing their own hype
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:43 (nine years ago) link
need someone (steve job) to yell at them
tell them they are dumb and useless
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 16:44 (nine years ago) link
I need a NERV mug so badly
― 龜, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 17:30 (nine years ago) link
i wonder if gruber and marco flirted remotely with their watches
― diamonddave85 (diamonddave85), Wednesday, 8 April 2015 17:40 (nine years ago) link
http://i.imgur.com/jtJgigJ.png
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 17:42 (nine years ago) link
How did he put it on his wrist
― 龜, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 17:45 (nine years ago) link
lol
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 17:53 (nine years ago) link
The reviews seem to me to be dancing around saying it's basically too slow and too dumb and unlike the OG iPhone (which was also both) isn't quite compelling enough to make you put up with it until they sort it.
Going to be really interesting to see how this pans out.
― stet, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 19:28 (nine years ago) link
john herrman is the best tech blog man going http://www.theawl.com/2015/04/an-asshole-theory-of-the-apple-watch
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 19:49 (nine years ago) link
I feel like he is on to something
then again, the other thing about getting your phone out to check something pretty much guarantees you are either going to - spend a few seconds retrieving it from your pocket and putting it back - embark on a couple minutes of checking twitter or w/e because you already got your phone out
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 19:56 (nine years ago) link
yeah kind of, i find it hard to believe that checking the watch is going to be appreciably faster/less intrusive than checking the phone. it's not too hard to quickly check a notification on your phone with some subtlety.
it's the decision to pause what you're doing and respond, or to go off and do something else on your phone, that is an avoidable behavior and also the behavior that is actually rude.
― call all destroyer, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 20:24 (nine years ago) link
also i'm still dying at this verge tech bro who didn't know that repeatedly checking your watch is considered rude by, like, all of society
― call all destroyer, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 20:25 (nine years ago) link
its like when google glass explorers were shocked that ppl didnt like having their picture taken w/o permission and blamed it on the fact that it was new technology
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 20:38 (nine years ago) link
that is an avoidable behavior and also the behavior that is actually rude.
it's not, though! people will kind of glance and their phone and sometimes multiple people will kind of do that while conversing or floating in and out of conversation
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 20:43 (nine years ago) link
I have only ever been called out on this once, and it was when I obviously thought a work meeting was boring as shit and I was reading twitter or w/e
u were tweeting "this meeting is boring as shit" and ur boss was reading ur tweet
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 20:51 (nine years ago) link
the dude who mentioned that actually got laid off, although I like him as a coworker!
tbh an odd number of my nemeses were on the list of people laid off at the beginning of this year
― mh, Wednesday, 8 April 2015 20:54 (nine years ago) link