Il Douché and His Discontents: The 2016 Primary Voting Thread, Part 4

I feel like carefully studying any extant videos of Trump's parents could yield abundant psych warfare ammo in the general. Replicating a dressing down from his mom for telling lies might be just the thing to poke an unpatchable hole in that thin skin.

she was a saint

yeah i think some of those segments oliver and stewart and whoever else has done them exist merely so people can smugshare them on facebook

xxxxxp so otm. I can't stand John Oliver.

p.s. a lot of European family names have changed since the 17th century, when less than 50% of people could sign their own names

also please note that stewart did not change his name and trump went on (wrongly) to deny he had ever said he had

― ulysses, Tuesday, March 1, 2016 1:18 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

what do you mean by did not change his name?

giving john oliver a platform is a greater embarrassment to the united states and than nominating trump

let's keep things in perspective here

I agree Oliver's yelling into an echo chamber but eh it doesn't bother me much

less embarrassing than Piers Morgan probably

no john oliver is definitely worse for american discourse than trump

aw i like John Oliver

no john oliver is definitely worse for american discourse than trump

I can't tell if you're being serious - for one thing way more people know who Trump is/listen to Trump; just setting aside who's more obnoxious Trump is unquestionably the bigger, more impactful figure.

geez i haven't seen his show but i had no idea there was a backlash

he's definitely being serious

I think it's a Brit thing, Morbs. We wouldn't understand.

my tennessean father, who has recently discovered email, just sent me the following:

We're rooting for the Donald today. He's promising to do what the Iraq War catastrophe, the '08 financial crisis, and $4 a gallon gasoline couldn't do: send the muthafuckin' Republican party up in flames. The way things are setting, today could be a major landmark for progressivism.Who'd a thunk Drumpf could accomplished all that? What a guy. And talk about "mysterious ways!"

There were a couple of funny lines in that Oliver thing, but twenty fucking minutes?

lol dads

btw we need cruz to win texas tonight so that he stays in the race

I think that's pretty likely

https://twitter.com/anamariecox/status/704729755547865089

Trump just said he’s “never heard” the insult that he has small hands. The guy lies about the WEIRDEST things.

xp yeah he's ahead by 7 or 8 points in the RCP average

xpost

That’s the first John Oliver I’ve seen but it looks like more of the same old (John Stewart) shit. I guess these people can claim that they are comedians, but their really a bunch of irresponsible newscasters just like the rest of them IMO

i think i read something debunking the dong size/hand size thing

i misposted this:

this is pretty good

http://www.vox.com/2016/3/1/11135756/donald-trump-nationalism

― goole, Tuesday, March 1, 2016 12:52 PM (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

ymmv with yglesias explainer mode but the first two paras are like duuuuh of course

the anti-trump right trying to pin this all on obama or liberalism generally has been hilarious. so acrobatic, these guys

― goole, Tuesday, March 1, 2016 12:53 PM (3 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Yeah but did anyone do a dong/hand check on the author, seems suspicious

i didn't even get that and had never heard dick size = hand size. Feet yes, hands no.
i just thought it was funny he was uptight about having pudgy hands.

i thought it was short fingers not small hands

SHORT FINGERED VULGARIAN

i enjoy gawker's various descriptions of trump, i'd poll them except they're too numerous to track down

That’s the first John Oliver I’ve seen but it looks like more of the same old (John Stewart) shit.

John Oliver has one schtick that he uses over and over again. Every bit has the exact same rhythm and uses the same "it's like (non-sequitur cultural reference)!" joke construction

if cruz wins tx and rubio loses fl will rubio drop out?

oh for pete's sake

John Oliver has one schtick that he uses over and over again. Every bit has the exact same rhythm and uses the same "it's like (non-sequitur cultural reference)!" joke construction

also stuff like "Go to bed Anthony! No one likes you and you've been crabby for 3 hours, you are ruining this evening Anthony! Go to bed!"

if cruz wins tx and rubio loses fl will rubio drop out?

seems like a possibility, but who knows.

FL isn't voting today

i know

I can't see Rubio staying in if he loses FL (which is looking likely). I look forward to his humiliation though. Hopefully it will end his career.

gonna go out on a limb and say that trying to insinuate that donald has a small dick isn't really going to work. dude has slept with a lot of hot chicks

idea: we take away florida's right to vote and replace them with Afred as a mega-super-delegate

yeah i hope rubio gets completely jindalled

Trump 2016: It's Not the Size of the Boat, It's the Motion of the Ocean...but Seriously Have you Seen this boat? Fantastic! It's great, the People Love this Boat! What can you say? It's beautiful...beautiful

Read a report that Koch Brothers/other big donors have drafted a plan to stop Trump - $75 million to Rubio, $75 million to enormous campaign against Trump. Under the condition that Rubio wins FL. If he loses, they'll get behind................Mitt Romney.

sure, seems like a good plan

lmao

and only 3 months late

http://i.imgur.com/CSn9z85.jpg

big day for cruz!

the john oliver thing will be so irrelevant. it exists in an echo chamber for people who already hate trump and want to feel better/smarter than other people

Like Savage's thing with Santorum?

I think Cruz and Rubio will both get just enough victory (at least in delegate terms) to stay in for a while. Both have been running around for week saying the sky is falling and Trump must be stopped By Any Means Necessary - they would look pretty foolish if tomorrow morning they were all like, "So, yeah, about that? Never mind. I'm done."

Plus Rubio at least has been putting out there the idea that his pledged delegates will give him convention leverage, even if he doesn't win any states outright. Not that it will work. (As I said earlier you can't combine the votes from two almosts and two nevers and beat one big Fuck Yeah. Clear will of the voters and whatnot.)

Rubio will stay in for the next two weeks at least, even if he's down to one staffer and he's forced to drink tap water instead of bottled. Then he can go off and be a lobbyist or lawyer or something. Cruz, I dunno. He's so loathesome I don't even want to spend mental energy on psychoanalyzing him.

If he loses, they'll get behind................Mitt Romney.

god I hope this is true

Big M.I.T.T.

i'm neutral on john oliver, but the civil forfeiture thing he did was legitimately good broadcasting, bringing to light to a serious issue that was otherwise basically ignored.