Il Douché and His Discontents: The 2016 Primary Voting Thread, Part 4

WE MUST NOT ALLOW AN ITALIAN CHEF GAP

I'm envisioning the Pasta Riots of the 2020s. Blocks-long lines to get into (even) Olive Garden, like during the gas crisis. People on street corners holding signs that read, "will work for rigatoni."

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/172404730876792832

man has a point

already past anyone's interest in this breakneck news cycle but fwiw a 78yo guy cold cocking someone and then saying that 'he could be ISIS' has frontotemporal dementia written all over it

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/172404730876792832

man has a point

― mookieproof, Friday, March 11, 2016 9:42 AM (26 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

i feel like this is an issue we could build bipartisan consensus around

Manolia Charlotin, a Haitian journalist based in New York, said Clinton’s actions should draw questions as to how Clinton would act should she become president: “What does that mean as to her approach to foreign policy? To have a secretary of state visit a country, to make a stop, and as a result of that meeting, you have an illegal selection of leaders? How does that decision promote the American views of democracy?”

In both Honduras and Haiti, Clinton chose to shy away from letting each country’s voters choose their leaders when the going got tough. American voters, the people of Honduras, the people of Haiti and anyone who cares about democracy and human rights should know whether Clinton as president would be a promoter of such values.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/post-partisan/wp/2016/03/10/hillary-clinton-needs-to-answer-for-her-actions-in-honduras-and-haiti/

Meantime

http://gawker.com/conservative-reporter-files-criminal-complaint-against-1764288589

rubio campaign: please vote for kasich in ohio to stop trump

kasich campaign: "We were going to win in OH without his help, just as he's going to lose in FL w/o ours"

of everything in her customarily stupid column, this infuriated me the most:

"If Trump wins the White House, that no-holds-barred video will go down in history as “the shot heard round the world,” Ralph Waldo Emerson’s phrase for the first salvo of the American Revolution by rural insurgents at Concord."

WHY WOULD EXPLAIN THIS REFERENCE. WHY.

Oh hey Ben Carson's quest to counsel Christian voters and continue to rake in money has lead him to the conclusion that endorsing Donald Trump is the way forward.

now envisioning Putin paying Carson to stab President Trump to death following some policy dispute

goole I answered your question in my own copy-pasting of that very sentence upthread!

in other news:

https://twitter.com/JaredWyand/status/708120011039068160

tracer this thread is for posting the same clip half a dozen times w/o reading, have you learned nothing this season

be sure to re-post it on next month's thread

holy shit at that tweet video shakey just posted.
cruz's pastor is a straight up psychopathic zealot

I thought we'd all seen Cruz's pastor by now; footage of him has certainly circulated through the news cycle.

this guy is literally calling for the death of homosexuals and then saying he's not afraid to die for his beliefs only moments before introducing ted cruz and ppl were worried about reverend wright???

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5pLobWHDdVw
"IT'S NOT A GAY TIME! This is, THESE ARE THE PEOPLE WITH THE SORES, THE GAPING SORES! THE SORES THAT ARE PUS-SY AND GROSS! AND PEOPLE ARE COMING IN AND CARVING HAPPY FACES ON THE SORES! That's not a nice thing to do! DON'T YOU DARE CARVE HAPPY FACES ON OPEN, PUS-SY SORES! DON'T YOU EVER DO THAT, DON'T YOU EVER DO THAT, I TELL YOU DON'T DO IT! Sackcloth and ashes, this is what America needs. America needs to hear the message... we are messed up."

I thought we'd all seen Cruz's pastor by now

this is a different guy from the one who converted his dad, afaict

i've never seen this guy before; he's a piece of work.

ts: "they eat the poopoo" vs "the people with the sores that are pus-sy and gross"

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/16/opinion/campaign-stops/ted-cruz-and-the-anti-gay-pastor.html?_r=0
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marc-leandro/arrest-pastor-kevin-swans_b_8534488.html
http://www.rawstory.com/2015/11/ted-cruz-boasts-about-endorsement-from-anti-gay-pastor-and-convicted-stalker/
http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/cruz-huckabee-and-jindal-will-join-pastor-who-wants-gays-put-death

I think I saw this mentioned on Inside Edition?

hm, so a little reading suggests this is not "Cruz's pastor" but some fuckhead that Cruz happily cosigned and this is old news
http://www.nytimes.com/2015/11/16/opinion/campaign-stops/ted-cruz-and-the-anti-gay-pastor.html

beat me to it.

it bears repeating that Cruz is an amoral bastard tho, especially in the face of #anybodybuttrump

Anybody Butt Rump

a movement we can all get behind

Yet a quick web search will turn up Mr. Swanson’s references to the demonic power of “the homosexual Borg,” the unmitigated evil of Harry Potter and the Disney character Princess Elsa’s lesbian agenda.

wait what's this about the borg, my star trek fandom is not strong but

it's a tennis diss

wtf is that pastor even talking about, "carving happy faces on the sores"?

it bears repeating that Cruz is an amoral bastard tho, especially in the face of #anybodybuttrump

― ulysses, Friday, March 11, 2016 12:59 PM (54 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

He does have a weird face, after all.

I want to walk that joke back, I should have thought more than 5 seconds before posting it

lol

http://barbwire.com/2015/04/02/0900-indiana-meets-the-big-gay-borg/

Update: The revised language has now been released, and it’s even worse than we thought. The new language forces Christian bakers to bake cakes in violation of their faith and conscience.

Baker Lives Matter

I may never read a sentence more glorious than "The new language forces Christian bakers to bake cakes in violation of their faith and conscience," in the rest of my lifetime.

wtf is that pastor even talking about, "carving happy faces on the sores"?

― Treeship, Friday, March 11, 2016 1:01 PM (14 seconds ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

He's saying there's gross gay stuff happening that are sores in america/culture and people are trying to forcefully make it seem like something to be happy about?

hey man, you bake the cakes, what we do with them once they leave your store is our own business

"I'd like a cake that says, 'THIS BAKER SUPPORTS SATAN' and the law says you have to do it!"

oh it's a metaphor xp

All kidding aside, whether or not it was intended as such by the Star Trek writers, the Borg collective is a chillingly appropriate metaphor for Cultural Marxism, the driving force of the LGBT movement. What we know as “political correctness” is simply the “group-think” of the Marxist hive mind.

Ulster (where else?) beat you to it.

So, America, is resistance to the LGBT Borg futile? Marxist regimes have been overthrown before. (And even Jon-Luc Picard eventually defeated his Borg opponents). I guess the outcome of this battle depends on how much we the not-yet-assimilated want to avoid becoming mindless slaves to the Collective.

maybe they missed the episodes where there were plenty of people the borg had no interest in assimilating

any body butt rump

"in closing, i'd like to say that i really like star trek and i have no idea how much we as a nation want to avoid becoming mindless slaves. Also, thanks to Janet for bringing her famous date-nut bread; it's $1.25 a slice and all proceeds go toward fighting the Collective. It's gluten free so please buy some on your way out. See you next Woden's Day."

Jesus never would have given baked goods to someone he didn't like...

oh wait.....

i think there was something called The Last Supper....?

oh yeah, Jesus comes out and say "Someone here will betray me, hey Judas, you want the first piece of bread?"

so yeah Jesus himself gives bread to somebody he knows will betray him. and he still does it.

i guess no place for forgiveness in modern "Left Behind" style Christianity.

you are bad at reading the bible

cool plz point out how i am bad at it rather than just saying "you are bad at it". cos i can just throw that back at you and we'll be here all day.

Judas received the sop in John 13. i'm curious as to how else you read that.