an ex-gf was incredibly funny w these (she used to do them in the voice of steve earle's character in the wire) but i cannot remember any of them because none of them made enough sense to remember. just remember not being able to breathe.
― florence foster wallace (difficult listening hour), Friday, 30 September 2016 06:03 (seven years ago) link
men seldom make passes, much like inert gases
― (The Other) J.D. (J.D.), Friday, 30 September 2016 06:19 (seven years ago) link
find a penny on the floorNed Beatty will come through your door
― Neanderthal, Friday, 30 September 2016 06:20 (seven years ago) link
If you can't see the forest, you can't hear the tree.
― Zachary Taylor, Friday, 30 September 2016 06:37 (seven years ago) link
Bodhidharma would have been all over this thread
― erudite beach boys fan (sheesh), Friday, 30 September 2016 07:29 (seven years ago) link
When the wind blows, the wind knows
― droit au butt (Euler), Friday, 30 September 2016 09:00 (seven years ago) link
One sweater, never betterTwo or more, your father's a whore
― illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 30 September 2016 09:04 (seven years ago) link
Red sky at night, shepherds' delightRed sky in the morning, horrible morning
― Lennon, Elvis, Hendrix etc (dog latin), Friday, 30 September 2016 09:10 (seven years ago) link
You dont react to the shark, you react to the other fish in the shoal
― provisional ilx (darraghmac), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 10:47 (four years ago) link
remember, when your pants are down around your ankles- that's the time to pull your socks up
― provisional ilx (darraghmac), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 10:48 (four years ago) link
when you're in a crater, stop gravitating
― a wagon to the curious (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 10:50 (four years ago) link
No need to make any up, literal translations of extant proverbs from other languages will suffice. To wit:
'Whether you like it or not, drink up the holy water, Gregory!'
'Placenta ahead, war backwards.'
'Like the Turk and his gun.'
― pomenitul, Tuesday, 17 September 2019 10:55 (four years ago) link
Hm, let's see, reckon you can work out what at least one of these is meant to convey
The dog doesn't catch the mouseThree monks have no water to drinkOne turnip, one holeThe candle illuminates others, yet destroys itselfNine cows and one cow hair
― mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 11:56 (four years ago) link
Or the classic "people mountain people sea"
― mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 11:57 (four years ago) link
first there is a people then there is no people then there is
― a wagon to the curious (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 11:59 (four years ago) link
if you are a big tree you have a small hand
happy knife, happy life
― Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 12:13 (four years ago) link
Only a pony rolls a blank stone
― L'assie (Euler), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 12:58 (four years ago) link
win at bingo, watch yo twin go
― a wagging to the furious (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 12:59 (four years ago) link
a hand in the bush is better than being bankrupt
― When I am afraid, I put my toast in you (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 12:59 (four years ago) link
seek not riches, seek out bitches
sometimes you eat the bar, and sometimes you just have the peanuts
― a wagging to the furious (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:00 (four years ago) link
― a wagging to the furious (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 12:59 (nine minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink
yo la tengo
― provisional ilx (darraghmac), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:09 (four years ago) link
life is a marathon, not a snickers
there's a mile of shit 'twixt the ox and the abattoir
― hoostanbank de reason lyrics mp4 hd video download (unregistered), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:27 (four years ago) link
an inch of foreskin, a pound of forebraina spoonful of glans, a head full of sense
― hoostanbank de reason lyrics mp4 hd video download (unregistered), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:30 (four years ago) link
you can't see the moon through a borrowed spyglass
― hoostanbank de reason lyrics mp4 hd video download (unregistered), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:35 (four years ago) link
We're always a tithe away from theosis.
― pomenitul, Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:35 (four years ago) link
It's better to have a swallow at the table than a stallion in a stable
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:38 (four years ago) link
two burnt cakes does not one unburnt cake make
― provisional ilx (darraghmac), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:39 (four years ago) link
Two whereabouts do not a what make.
― pomenitul, Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:42 (four years ago) link
A whale can't see its own tail
― The Pingularity (ledge), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:42 (four years ago) link
A sack of shit is always too heavy
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:43 (four years ago) link
↑ good one, it just rings eternally true.
― pomenitul, Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:44 (four years ago) link
you can't yoke an ox to a ploughing engine
― hoostanbank de reason lyrics mp4 hd video download (unregistered), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:44 (four years ago) link
A spoonful today will taste okA spoonful tomorrow will taste of sorrow
― The Pingularity (ledge), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:45 (four years ago) link
a chandler never asksesan axeman where his wax isan axeman never quandarieswhere a laundrer keeps his laundries
― provisional ilx (darraghmac), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:46 (four years ago) link
Refrain from peeing through a keyholeAnd putting keys inside your peehole
― Welcome To My Lifemare (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:53 (four years ago) link
boil the lance before lancing the boil
― hoostanbank de reason lyrics mp4 hd video download (unregistered), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 13:57 (four years ago) link
^vg
― The Ravishing of ROFL Stein (Hadrian VIII), Tuesday, 17 September 2019 14:07 (four years ago) link
If your butt feels sour, use that internal power
― sorry for butt rockin (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 12 February 2020 16:12 (four years ago) link
even a watched clock never boils
― doorstep jetski (dog latin), Monday, 6 July 2020 20:38 (three years ago) link
A swallowed turd does not coprophagia make.
― pomenitul, Monday, 6 July 2020 20:47 (three years ago) link
Where there’s a will, there’s a corpse
― Dan Worsley, Monday, 6 July 2020 21:24 (three years ago) link
clean arsehole, clean mind
― calzino, Monday, 6 July 2020 21:31 (three years ago) link
two wrongs don't make a right; but two rights send you into oncoming traffic
― I hear that sometimes Satan wants to defund police (Neanderthal), Monday, 6 July 2020 22:40 (three years ago) link
the mintier the julep, the prettier the baby.
― the unappreciated charisma of cows (Aimless), Monday, 6 July 2020 23:52 (three years ago) link