US Politics January 2018: "You All Just Got A Lot Richer"

i would rank the possibility that trump read that book today at 0%

He Tweeted "Sloppy" I Think He Missed The Poll, la Poll, la Poll laaaa

why would he need to read it, he was there, he knows what really happened, he has one of the best memories ever, etc.

choking, cheating, begging for money, getting fired......all the classic shit dogs are constantly doing. pic.twitter.com/GCxuDigKJB

— bobby 👖 (@bobby) January 6, 2018

I'm fairly convinced that most of the people who excitedly voted for Trump were fueled by the idea of siccing their worst and most hated neighbor/coworker/boss/relative on that uppity lady candidate. I can't imagine that most of them actually like him as a person (and certainly would never want to share a beer with him, or drink a beer in his weirdly teetotaling company, rather). He's like that feral pit bull you keep locked up in your tool shed. He's a straight-up unlikable sumbitch, but goddammit he gets the job done.

My god, though, he's such a magnificently reactive brainstem! He just keeps hyping this book that makes him look like a total ass! Dude, it's already the #1 book in the country, don't oversell.

He's like that feral pit bull you keep locked up in your tool shed

this was maybe not the best metaphor at this particular juncture in time

Donald Trump is nothing like a pit bull. A pit bull raised in privilege and comfort like Trump would be a loyal, affectionate and playful creature.

He Tweeted "Sloppy" I Think He Missed The Poll, la Poll, la Poll laaaa

― Never Learn To Mike Love (C. Grisso/McCain), Saturday, 6 January 2018 04:54 (thirty-two minutes ago) Permalink

hard lol

In honor

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf1sy002-lc

Why does that sound to me like a remix of the Miami Vice theme

Pubic Fruit

Donald Trump is nothing like a pit bull. A pit bull raised in privilege and comfort like Trump would be a loyal, affectionate and playful creature.

his dog thing always makes me think of the end of the trial. the perfect authoritarian tic

untruthful, maybe, but boring? come on.

In fairness to the Circus Peanut in Chief, I find everything about our historical moment and his bad burlesque-act reign truly, deeply, motherfucking boring.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DSzjjslXUAEmF0-.jpg

is he saying the book is full of lies or is he saying, different perspectives from different sources with different interests don't tally and are sometimes purposefully deceitful? it's the latter

It is the latter, but why start reading-comprehension-shaming now?

I assumed that when Trump says "like a dog" it's a euphemism for "like a bitch" cf the Access Hollywood tape (evidence that he's capable of at least some level of self-censorship?)

I keep catching myself singing "I saw my Bannon getting sloppy", and grossing myself out.

....Actually, throughout my life, my two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart. Crooked Hillary Clinton also played these cards very hard and, as everyone knows, went down in flames. I went from VERY successful businessman, to top T.V. Star.....

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 6, 2018

....to President of the United States (on my first try). I think that would qualify as not smart, but genius....and a very stable genius at that!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 6, 2018

stable genius = horse's ass

Love this guy

Love this guy

"and being, like, really smart"

'First try' – riiight. He already ran in 2000, back when universal healthcare was part of his platform.

Late to the monkey party, but why in the world would anyone find the gorilla channel story implausible? I mean, you can find footage of Trump talking to Rudy in drag, Trump in overalls singing the green acres theme ... pretty much everything about Trump is completely ridiculous from head/hair to hands, so why not apes?

Anyway, he's a genius, geniuses are weird.

a man with a spiral combover is capable of anything

Going the full Fredo, pretty great.

Seriously. It's like the Godfather if everyone was Fredo.
http://s.quickmeme.com/img/6c/6c3a118d3e47bd95c9e148fd0632933cf02eb7b2c9916d1e9577e091c0bfb611.jpg

And you know if Trump drank he would drink banana daiquiris.

Oh goodness gracious. We can be civil, cheerful, respectful to & friends with people who don’t share our religious beliefs. Sometimes, we even marry them. I’m a Methodist & my husband is Jewish, thank you for asking. A very happy New Year to you Rhonda! https://t.co/8UH9SP8EWO

— Chelsea Clinton (@ChelseaClinton) January 3, 2018

the washington post ran an op ed begging people to not read the “trashy” wolff book

it was written by a mucky muck at... citizens united! (the one who wrote the book with lewandowski. it was of course plugged.)

they’re not even TRYING to hide it

xpost I guess that was in response to some Trump supporter accusing her of being a Satanist after goofing around on twitter.

we're p much in Star Wars Ep 2 at this point, politically speaking

will all the dominionist evangelical preachers in the land read 'fire and fury' from the pulpit approvingly?

Actually typing "like, really smart" = deliberate wind-up even more than usual.

More like "Smart? Like, really?"

I want Trump to be so smart, so intensely smart, that his head explodes, like in "Scanners."

that isn't why the head exploded in Scanners

maybe fox will add blipverts. that cause of head explosion seems more up trumps alley

"and being, like, really smart"

― ♫ very clever with maracas.jpg ♫ (Le Bateau Ivre),

I love the comma placement; he's been getting grammar lessons.

Fun times for the family!

BREAKING NEWS: The SEC is investigating the real-estate company run by Jared Kushner's family for its use of the EB-5 federal investment-for-visa program https://t.co/aE0DHm6yE2

— Citizens for Ethics (@CREWcrew) January 6, 2018

https://media.giphy.com/media/3ohzdZScea8JBm8hck/giphy.gif

xpost yeah the formal evals of his recent tweets point to a ghost tweeter. but content evals are confusing, no ghost is that stupid.

"like, really smart" is a bit he's done in many campaign speeches and public appearances, his ppl love it

his ppl think all rich people are really smart unlike poor scientists

I choose to believe that's Kellyanne C. in Alfred's gif (on a really good bags-under-eyes day).

so is little jeff sessions getting fired this weekend? 1/2 term invited everyone to camp david but jeffy

Trump in overalls singing the green acres theme

now wait a second

“Je suis un génie”, “Ich bin ein sehr stabiles genie" and more #stablegenius headlines from France, Germany, U.K., The Netherlands,... pic.twitter.com/NuvpdnTiiE

— Vladimir Duthiers (@vladduthiersCBS) January 6, 2018