ILE Weight Watchaz

mrs mac's credentials as an ilxor wont be boosted by her having enjoyed and rather successfully used "french women dont get fat" as a template/guide but it has def helped her lessen a constantly watchful attitude towards all food and tbh i think she mainly just wanted to imagine life as a french literature graduate champagne executive married to a rich guy

nb I realise she wasnt a great ilxor candidate on other more obvious fronts ie consorting with known terrorists

I know for me food has been a very precarious issue: having had boulemia in my 20s, it was and still is very conflicted. But I don't have an emotional bond w food anymore. But I know it'll always be a struggle anyway. Just not a control issue anymore. Because I solved what the root of it was (mommy issues lol).

And it feels awkward to say it. I even felt a failure having boulemia. But fuck it. There should be no shame in it.

Having had.

Trying to live a healthier lifestyle is wonderful but dieting is probably one of the main reasons behind your binging on sugar.

Except that before I quit, there was no restriction. There's no cycle of dieting to speak of. I think I tried quitting sugar once before as a new years thing that was destined to fail anyway. I grew up just absolutely hoovering desserts. It didn't matter to me as a young man - I was rail thin until it started catching up with me in my mid-twenties and after that I certainly didn't stop eating things I liked.

While I've been attempting to eat more nutritiously in other ways over many years, I don't view my journey as "dieting" so much as quitting a drug. Which I've successfully done before with alcohol and tobacco. I didn't get sucked back in this time because the urge to eat sugar was just so overwhelming to me after being deprived of it. I was at total peace with myself for a long time.

But I kept ending up being peer pressured to eat sweets in social situations. Mother-in-law: "C'mon peace, you're not going to have a slice of my apple pie?" "I will graciously eat a slice of pie, mother-in-law, if it means so much to you..." etc. I thought I could handle returning for an occasional nibble, but the holiday cascade of situations like this ultimately led to recklessness and overconfidence. I mean, what would happen if I took the same approach to alcohol? I would be back to daily liquor store visits in no time!

Anyway, thanks for the advice all, and ogmar on the money.

prob maybe need to start a men-only weight thread idk? the issues seem to be insurmountably different and good ppl are getting upset over it.

prob maybe need to start a men-only weight thread idk? the issues seem to be insurmountably different and good ppl are getting upset over it.

― deemsthelarker (darraghmac)

the bullshit men are told about their bodies and the bullshit women are told about their bodies are categorically different varieties of bullshit, yeah. and as a non-binary person i get to deal with both kinds. lucky me!

i'm not sure the differences are "insurmountable". also as a non-binary person having a "men's" and a "women's" weight loss thread would reinforce once again what a misfit i am, but i guess i'm used to that.

Not sure there’s such a clear gender divide. As a male with food issues, something Caitlin Moran wrote about binge eaters really resonated with me when I read it:

Overeating is the addiction of choice of "carers," and that's why it's come to be regarded as the lowest-ranking of all the addictions. It's a way of screwing yourself up while still remaining fully functional, because you have to. Fat people aren't indulging in the "luxury" of their addiction, making them useless, chaotic or a burden. Instead, they are slowly self-destructing in a way that doesn't inconvenience anyone. And that is why it's so often a woman's addiction of choice.

Interesting perspective about the carers. But I don't get why that necessarily makes it a 'woman's addiction of choice'. I mean, dudes who don't remain fully functional aren't going to be much good in their stereotypical roles either.

in 80% of OA meetings i've been to i've been the only guy there. just saying.

Good to have that perspective. Possibly a lot of dudes just never choose to do address it? Out of pure curosity, I googled up OA meetings local to me and the closest one is held in a health care center located on - I kid you not - Milkshake Lane.

fwiw OA isn't for "fat people" per se, it attracts a lot of people with disordered eating. incl. women who have been surrounded by toxic sexist bullshit about weight their whole lives.

i got criticized for my weight & appearance a lot as a young kid & it sure did fuck me up, but it's pretty clear to me that as a man i have a lot more wiggle room in life & my issues w/food would be exacerbated considerably if i had to put up with the social messaging that women do

hmmm there might be something to the "carers" quote there

ok maybe not a gender specific thread just a thread where ppl are allowed to quit sugar without the yknow

Good god that carers definition in relation to binging: so me. :-( I am better at it but even at work I have been told I erase myself and comply too much. :-(