This was literally the exact premise of an episode of Corporate.
― Simon H., Wednesday, 8 May 2019 23:25 (five years ago) link
Men, should you be wearing makeup? Probably – you look terrible. pic.twitter.com/BPWDqahjqU— Corporate (@corporate) January 30, 2019
― Simon H., Wednesday, 8 May 2019 23:26 (five years ago) link
So You Want to Market a Product for Men
Remember, any product can be marketed to men, even something that has been the exclusive province of women for time immemorial, like water. All you need to do is make sure your marketing materials are really tough and masculine.Connect with men by showing them things they love. Things like: fire, tattoos, blood (non-menstrual), skulls, bulls, spikes, leather bracelets, dirt, rocks, SEXXX, mountains, cold hard CA$$$H, motorcycles, barbells, gray T-shirts, red meat, Joe Rogan, golden retrievers, skateboarding, camo, guitars, dinosaurs, sports, knives, arm-wrestling, regular wrestling, the constant all-consuming fear that if you don’t assert your masculinity aggressively enough people will dismiss you, sweat, shredded abs, tigers, saying swears, cigars, quoting Scarface, more SEX, weapons, Tucker Max, baseball caps, jackhammering, mud, trucks, iron, the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, abandoned construction sites, brown liquors, those big tires you push over, etc.So, for example, say you’re trying to sell an exciting new fruit-forward Pinot Noir from Oregon. Call it Dirt Blood, and have your ads be videos of a man driving a truck on a dirt road and chugging Pinot, before pulling over to make out with a woman with big boobs (hot). Then maybe he looks into the camera and says something like, “Dirt … It’s in my blood.” And you’re like, What? But you’re also pumped. You’re pumped to buy a wine called Dirt Blood.
Connect with men by showing them things they love. Things like: fire, tattoos, blood (non-menstrual), skulls, bulls, spikes, leather bracelets, dirt, rocks, SEXXX, mountains, cold hard CA$$$H, motorcycles, barbells, gray T-shirts, red meat, Joe Rogan, golden retrievers, skateboarding, camo, guitars, dinosaurs, sports, knives, arm-wrestling, regular wrestling, the constant all-consuming fear that if you don’t assert your masculinity aggressively enough people will dismiss you, sweat, shredded abs, tigers, saying swears, cigars, quoting Scarface, more SEX, weapons, Tucker Max, baseball caps, jackhammering, mud, trucks, iron, the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition, abandoned construction sites, brown liquors, those big tires you push over, etc.
So, for example, say you’re trying to sell an exciting new fruit-forward Pinot Noir from Oregon. Call it Dirt Blood, and have your ads be videos of a man driving a truck on a dirt road and chugging Pinot, before pulling over to make out with a woman with big boobs (hot). Then maybe he looks into the camera and says something like, “Dirt … It’s in my blood.” And you’re like, What? But you’re also pumped. You’re pumped to buy a wine called Dirt Blood.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 10 May 2019 12:20 (five years ago) link
not a great attempt
― FernandoHierro, Friday, 10 May 2019 12:22 (five years ago) link
Love that it only took a handful of replies before the War Paint twitter dude 'actually'-ed a woman.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 12:30 (five years ago) link
i legit thought the war paint thing was a parody
― marcos, Friday, 10 May 2019 13:03 (five years ago) link
We may have previously been safe in assuming such things but we're kind of in a whole new world now.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 13:25 (five years ago) link
Liquid Death seems like a pretty tongue-in-cheek angle, the true insecure macho version would be, like, "Tactical H20" in camo flasks (maybe this already exists, but I'd rather not know).
― days of being riled (zchyrs), Friday, 10 May 2019 13:56 (five years ago) link
(This is not to say that Liquid Death isn't also stupid and embarrassing).
eagerly awaiting the emergence of an anal hygiene product for manly men
they can call it "DoucheBro"
― Burt Bacharach's Bees (rushomancy), Friday, 10 May 2019 14:10 (five years ago) link
Emena.
― pomenitul, Friday, 10 May 2019 14:16 (five years ago) link
Old Spice
― Yerac, Friday, 10 May 2019 14:32 (five years ago) link
epsom salts?
― :∵·∴·∵: (crüt), Friday, 10 May 2019 14:34 (five years ago) link
like ..... water?
an overarching problem here is the stupidity of all marketing i mean i know we all get that but
― deemsthelarker (darraghmac), Friday, 10 May 2019 14:50 (five years ago) link
I wouldn't know who to be without the guidepost of products marketed to my particular demographic. I get the impression that I should be punching more things and perhaps bellowing incoherently.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:10 (five years ago) link
I get the impression that I should be punching more things and perhaps bellowing incoherently.
As should we all.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:20 (five years ago) link
I had to go to Target today to buy things like paper towels and household cleaning products, but I reinforced my masculinity by picking up a Blu-Ray set of the first two John Wick movies while I was there.
― shared unit of analysis (unperson), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:21 (five years ago) link
thinking about picking up some Mandles so my house can smell like napalm
― frogbs, Friday, 10 May 2019 15:23 (five years ago) link
step 1) constantly rub your knuckles at work and complain about how they hurt, until someone asksstep 2) "..."step 3) "...punched a wall"step 4) "...I don't want to talk about it"step 5) drink camo H20
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:24 (five years ago) link
Way to snake my Camo H2O ad pitch, bro. (punches wall)
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:27 (five years ago) link
(damn...that hydrated guy is so manly...)
― these are not all of the possible side effects (Karl Malone), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:42 (five years ago) link
Maybe my ctrl+f skills are failing me atm, but I'm frankly flabbergasted that no one itt ever brought up Devour, the frozen meals you just can't wait to bone.
― Artisanal Personality Disorder (Old Lunch), Friday, 10 May 2019 15:49 (five years ago) link
there are very few times in my life where I've understood the "punch a wall" impulse but I've heard a ridiculous number of stories of others doing so
― mh, Friday, 10 May 2019 20:18 (five years ago) link
https://i.imgur.com/6oyGkCA.png?1
― pplains, Saturday, 11 May 2019 00:10 (five years ago) link
just overheard on a television i could not see: THE PLAID SHIRT HAS SIGNIFIED STRENGTH FOR OVER 100 YEARS
― difficult listening hour, Tuesday, 4 June 2019 23:42 (five years ago) link
And the plaid skirt did for 1000 years before that, fuckers!
― Una Palooka Dronka (hardcore dilettante), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 01:46 (five years ago) link
i don't understand that drywall post at all
― weird woman in a bar (La Lechera), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:15 (five years ago) link
I think it's equivalent to
Person:Mildly inconvenienced white guy: Finally! A worthy opponent! Our battle will be legendary!
― jmm, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:40 (five years ago) link
Is it because some guys punch drywall when they get emotional? I don't get it either.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:47 (five years ago) link
Yeah, belay my last post, I guess the joke is that white guys will get angry and punch a wall at the mildest inconvenience.
― jmm, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:49 (five years ago) link
https://i.imgur.com/qVZDQYg.png
https://i.imgur.com/Q65RmTO.png
― pplains, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:50 (five years ago) link
I once kicked a hole in drywall because we were tearing down a wall anyway and the stud was behind it. I cracked the ball of my foot. It kind of sucked.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:55 (five years ago) link
lol xp
the joke is that white guys will get angry and punch a wall at the mildest inconvenience.
― jmm, Wednesday, June 5, 2019 3:49 PM (five minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink
This really is a thing though, right? I've seen it happen around me. Odd.
― Uptown VONC (Le Bateau Ivre), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:56 (five years ago) link
I don't understand where it came from? Seeing your dad do it? I feel like I have been in frat houses/boy college apartments that had a lot of those holes in the wall.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 13:58 (five years ago) link
My best friend put a hole in a wall at a party in college, but it was when she she put her foot up on the wall to tie her shoelace.
― tokyo rosemary, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 14:18 (five years ago) link
the worst I've ever done in my life was angrily kicking a hollow core door
somehow, even barefoot, I kicked all the way through it
so, a very shameful incident, but kind of impressive nonetheless
― mh, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 14:33 (five years ago) link
we used to party with a dude who would randomly get angry and punch holes in the wall, I remember most of us just praying he'd hit a stud but he never did
― frogbs, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 14:39 (five years ago) link
in my experience you either have to be predisposed to punching and kicking shit or be pretty horrible at emotional regulation to start hitting the architecture
― mh, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 14:50 (five years ago) link
I went to high school with a dude who punched a brick wall after his girlfriend dumped him. Unsurprisingly, he did not put a hole in it.
― Arugula Raccoon (DJP), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:07 (five years ago) link
https://d13ezvd6yrslxm.cloudfront.net/wp/wp-content/images/Silicon-Valley-Door-Kick.jpg
― AlXTC from Paris, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:18 (five years ago) link
Que es mas macho: punching holes in drywall or patching holes in drywall?
― Brad C., Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:27 (five years ago) link
xp maybe the hole punchers would be modifying behavior quicker if we weren't in such a ubiquitous drywall culture. or we'd have a lot more hospital visits
my house has some drywall over lathe/plaster. sure as hell not punching anything around there
― mh, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:29 (five years ago) link
The most I ever did was kick in the door of my parents' kitchen cabinet as a teenager. I felt bad for destroying their kitchen cabinet after.
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:30 (five years ago) link
I use to throw the remote control at my brothers a lot growing up. I guess we would also try to beat the crap out of each other but we were good and put our karate gloves on first. I have never felt the urge to angrily punch drywall.
― Yerac, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:32 (five years ago) link
I have punched a hole in a door in my house once during an argument. Not proud of it obviously but it's not really different from throwing/breaking dishes (which my wife has done a few times !), imo, or is it ?
― AlXTC from Paris, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:42 (five years ago) link
The symbolic meaning of the choice of thing to break seems p interesting
― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:47 (five years ago) link
I'm not sure that I could punch through drywall if I tried. My thing was always hitting or banging my head, which might be a similar impulse.
― jmm, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 15:47 (five years ago) link
ahah, done that too !
― AlXTC from Paris, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 16:02 (five years ago) link
be pretty horrible at emotional regulation
and this is pretty otm !
― AlXTC from Paris, Wednesday, 5 June 2019 16:04 (five years ago) link
yall houses be made of some shit huh
― godfellaz (darraghmac), Wednesday, 5 June 2019 16:12 (five years ago) link