"one neighbour's stuff, another might need" grinds my gears so fucking hard
― Xia Nu del Vague (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 17:17 (four years ago) link
Dove and the fucking microbiome.
"If our bodies have it, then we should respect it". Yes, but until they told you about it, you didn't even know what it was, FFS.
― Bloody Snail, Tuesday, 5 November 2019 22:20 (four years ago) link
So if you have a horrible abcess or growth you should respect it? Not that I do, of course. Have a horrible abcess or growth, that is.
― Michael Oliver of Penge Wins £5 (Tom D.), Tuesday, 5 November 2019 22:44 (four years ago) link
tesco club card plus, revoiced Casablanca scene, low quality.
(then there's the idea of a *paid* loyalty card)
― koogs, Wednesday, 6 November 2019 20:21 (four years ago) link
the important thing is that Giffgaff is stylishly incomprehensible garbage.
― A is for (Aimless), Wednesday, 6 November 2019 21:05 (four years ago) link
I use giffgaff and I think it's brilliant, almost perfect, but their marketing, the matey tone they use for voicemails, all terrible
― or something, Wednesday, 6 November 2019 21:55 (four years ago) link
I don't even know what it is.
― Michael Oliver of Penge Wins £5 (Tom D.), Wednesday, 6 November 2019 23:43 (four years ago) link
giffgaff is gabbo
― A is for (Aimless), Thursday, 7 November 2019 00:39 (four years ago) link
(Alexei Sayles had things to say about giffgaff, and the financial crisis, in his sandwich show thing the other day. It was a repeat but...)
― koogs, Thursday, 7 November 2019 03:37 (four years ago) link
That Dacia advert is back and the "Go Duster!" in completely the wrong place annoys me as much as ever.
― So, your CV says you're a (checks notes) DJ and stand-up comedian (aldo), Thursday, 7 November 2019 17:21 (four years ago) link
pc world 'crimbo' adverts
― koogs, Saturday, 9 November 2019 11:38 (four years ago) link
... the ones with the long overdue reappearance of Advert Man, shaven and looking a little older?
― 'Skills' Wallace (Tom D.), Saturday, 9 November 2019 12:58 (four years ago) link
OK, so the guy looks like your standard issue UK advertising bearded wanker but, Jesus, the accent, this is probably the worst American accent I have ever heard...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WfhEaYUWFdE
... and this isn't a one off either, all of their adverts have this Dick Van Dyke In Reverse lead character.
― 'Skills' Wallace (Tom D.), Saturday, 9 November 2019 13:02 (four years ago) link
Jesus if I hear one more advert using that "She did a bad bad thing" song aka the cuntiest record of all time I'm gonna write a hyperbolic sweary post on the Worst Adverts thread
― Joe Kulak 😎 (Noodle Vague), Monday, 11 November 2019 18:18 (four years ago) link
I feel like there's a bumper crop of terrible adverts at the moment. Apparently there's different versions of this particular monstrosity, byut thankfully this is the only one I've seen.📹
― gyac, Monday, 11 November 2019 20:00 (four years ago) link
I wish Aldi would stop trying to make that fucking carrot happen
― Joe Kulak 😎 (Noodle Vague), Monday, 11 November 2019 21:09 (four years ago) link
people love that fucking carrot unfortunately
― Number None, Monday, 11 November 2019 22:21 (four years ago) link
who the fuck could love the fucking carrot and what kind of monster would rather have carrots than sprouts?
― Joe Kulak 😎 (Noodle Vague), Monday, 11 November 2019 22:23 (four years ago) link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=multn2bwycM
― mark s, Monday, 11 November 2019 22:24 (four years ago) link
I was gonna guess there was a dog's head in the box but not like that.
― Joe Kulak 😎 (Noodle Vague), Monday, 11 November 2019 22:26 (four years ago) link
M&S Christmas food: because the gulags can't come quickly enough
― Joe Kulak 😎 (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 12 November 2019 01:23 (four years ago) link
I hope that little cunt shilling for the British Heart Foundation gets vascular dementia soon
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 16:41 (four years ago) link
Did somebody say just eat
― or something, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 16:45 (four years ago) link
Hell yes
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 16:46 (four years ago) link
And now it's stuck in my head, kill me please
― or something, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 16:51 (four years ago) link
Having said that I am considering ordering a kebab
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 16:55 (four years ago) link
Was bombarded with Postcode Lottery adverts when in England for a couple of days. Hoooooboy... They completely copied the aesthetics of this vile Dutch lottery, down to the logo and colours. And with the same fake plastic smiley celebs you want to punch in the face again and again. They've got it down to a tee. Depressing and disturbing. Another Dutch export success!
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:16 (four years ago) link
they're the worst and absolutely pitched at the poorest section of society, something feels very real and very fucked about the emotional impact of winning a five figure sum of money to people and on some level i can relate, i didn't even realise the cunts doing the advert were "celebs" until i looked them up
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:19 (four years ago) link
the cancer charity one is the worst tho, some 15 year old twat in specs and a lab coat so you're supposed to think he's a scientist
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:20 (four years ago) link
i hate advertising on some visceral dna puritan level tbf tho, also i'm a depressed moaning bore
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:21 (four years ago) link
I've said it before but I can never listen to Let Em In again and I liked that song a lot
― or something, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:26 (four years ago) link
I admit using 'celebs' rather freely there, but over here it's exactly the same: crestfallen soap opera 'stars' and strictly come dancing ppl etc. Fuck, I looked the UK one up and the wiki says even Attenbrough is an "ambassador", sad lol. I was taken aback seeing it on English telly because I naively thought this tragedy had been confined to this country. But of course the cunts exported this lottery that plays on FOMO and guilt, because it does so very well what you just said: wring out some more dough from the poorest, instilling them with the fear of their cunt neighbours winning a huge prize and them being left behind. It's criminal.
A Dutch add (viewer discretion is advised). Same aesthetics, same "celebs" you want to slice open. All I want for christmas is the bald fucker to be decapitated, plz Santa:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZZSGs5nWW0
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:27 (four years ago) link
oh shit i didn't realise it was an international property
the irony is that "postcode lottery" started life as a phrase describing something v negative
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:29 (four years ago) link
Above ad amazingly, defiantly doesn't even contain tears. It's in the fine print that if you win, they can waterboard and taser you till you cry and admit your darkest fears and secrets. Because some GRATITUDE hello people. xp
A fine Dutch invention :(
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:31 (four years ago) link
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, November 19, 2019 8:29 PM (one minute ago) bookmarkflaglink
Would campaign for that meaning to overtake the better known one here tbf
― Le Bateau Ivre, Tuesday, 19 November 2019 19:32 (four years ago) link
Dear Macmillan I bet you think you're so clever with your chirpy song about death which is fucking horrible you scumbags
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 20 November 2019 10:13 (four years ago) link
it's Marie Curie I think, not Macmillan?
that's a double-edged one really. I could really do without the endless parade of funeral planning and life insurance for the over 50s ads, and this falls into that for me, but my wife doesn't mind this particular ad because she thinks people should be talking about death more. I doubt she'd feel the same way if it was Macmillan doing it though, because she hates Macmillan
― Colonel Poo, Wednesday, 20 November 2019 12:59 (four years ago) link
That makes two of us - at least.
Now I love red hair and I love redheads and, if I were to let my beard grow, you'd soon see I've got the gene myself - having said all that, any chance that advertising agencies can stop using redheads (women and children especially) in every second advert? It's the abject lack of imagination displayed by these advertising 'creatives' that irritates me rather than people with red hair fwiw.
― 'Skills' Wallace (Tom D.), Wednesday, 20 November 2019 13:15 (four years ago) link
i think you're right CP, i didn't bother to factcheck. otm about all the funeral plan ads but i find that Marie Curie thing particularly triggering even tho your wife is right, really.
That fucking screamy "I want my bang bang" song on the phone advert, now that's *really* triggering, but it triggers hatred
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 20 November 2019 13:27 (four years ago) link
jfc at that Tesco Casablanca advert
― The World According To.... (Michael B), Wednesday, 20 November 2019 13:29 (four years ago) link
i like the way they don't even try to sound like the actors
― The Man Who Was Thirsty (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 20 November 2019 13:35 (four years ago) link
And I keep hearing it as ‘...that can’t stop talking about’, instead of ‘...you can’t stop talking about. It’s annoying, in a minor way.
― Bidh boladh a' mhairbh de 'n láimh fhalaimh (dowd), Wednesday, 20 November 2019 13:54 (four years ago) link
Is there anything more let's nuke the planet from orbit than perfume ads?
― éminence rose et jaune (Noodle Vague), Friday, 6 December 2019 17:59 (four years ago) link
I get great joy from the TV perfume ad that goes"Shall I.... rephrase the question?""..... I'm not going to be the person I'm expected to be any more"
It is SOOOOOOOOO SHITand it's for a MEGA LUXURY BRANDand it's DIRECTED BY SCORSESE
and it's like something Alan Partridge would come up with
― kinder, Friday, 6 December 2019 18:22 (four years ago) link
I still don't like it when Natalie Portman glowers at me like it's my fault
― éminence rose et jaune (Noodle Vague), Friday, 6 December 2019 18:24 (four years ago) link
Oh my god Scorsese directed that ad that rips off Mishima?
― éminence rose et jaune (Noodle Vague), Friday, 6 December 2019 18:25 (four years ago) link
New andrex one with skincare vloggers can fuck off
― mfktz (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Friday, 6 December 2019 21:49 (four years ago) link
Any advert with 'ordinary people' (actors) singing a famous song badly - because ordinary people (stupid plebs) can't sing.
― I've Got A Ron Wood Solo Album To Listen To (Tom D.), Friday, 6 December 2019 21:53 (four years ago) link
Any advert with actors playing homeless people because real homeless aren't sympathetic enough
― Mark G, Friday, 6 December 2019 22:29 (four years ago) link
they keep showing THE SAME 'on the beach' advert twice in a single ad break. why?
― koogs, Sunday, 29 December 2019 19:11 (four years ago) link