lmao at your post bumping that thread ulysses
― warn me about a lurking rake (One Eye Open), Thursday, 19 December 2019 18:54 (four years ago) link
holy shit, i just lost myself in that thread for ... what day is it?
― Josh in Chicago, Thursday, 19 December 2019 19:04 (four years ago) link
Great thred
― Its big ball chunky time (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Thursday, 19 December 2019 19:06 (four years ago) link
my gf really hates the uppers music as it means she needs to find my phone
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Thursday, 19 December 2019 19:16 (four years ago) link
Here's the one-two: FT's Nigel Andrews gives a positive review!
https://www.ft.com/content/cd836eb2-2180-11ea-b8a1-584213ee7b2b
...and then IMMEDIATELY RETIRES.
https://www.ft.com/content/d70957b2-20e5-11ea-b8a1-584213ee7b2b
― Ned Raggett, Friday, 20 December 2019 00:04 (four years ago) link
All the best zings:
https://digg.com/2019/bad-reviews-cats-movie
― DJI, Friday, 20 December 2019 00:20 (four years ago) link
Just had a -great- time reading those zings aloud to my partner - this one made her double over: “an approximation of what would happen if your third eye actually opened and you could suddenly see into the astral plane.”
― warn me about a lurking rake (One Eye Open), Friday, 20 December 2019 00:35 (four years ago) link
There is a thin line between idiocy and genius, and Cats pukes a hairball on it and rubs its ass all over it.
A+
― Maria Edgelord (cryptosicko), Friday, 20 December 2019 03:37 (four years ago) link
Best thread ever
― Don’t Slander Meme (James Redd and the Blecchs), Friday, 20 December 2019 13:00 (four years ago) link
Sounds like Sonic is really gonna have to deliver to top this one (I maintain hope that the 45 seconds of fan-pleasing reworked animation we've seen is all that they'll have the time to handle properly and that the remainder of the overhaul will somehow look even worse than the first trailer).
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 13:09 (four years ago) link
please don't make me think about sonic topping cats
― i chop up the orange and chomp on the inside of it (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 20 December 2019 13:16 (four years ago) link
Too late (barfs, coughs up hairball).
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 20 December 2019 13:20 (four years ago) link
Sonic the Edgehog: Runpleteazer
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 14:10 (four years ago) link
the animators who worked 70 hour weeks to re-do the entire movie are probably pissed that this thing came out like that, "see, it's fine!!"
― frogbs, Friday, 20 December 2019 14:12 (four years ago) link
Just checked Box Office Mojo to see what kind of business this thing needs to do to break even ($95 million budget!) and only now learned that IMDB has recently destroyed Box Office Mojo. Capital work, fellows.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 14:31 (four years ago) link
I'm actually amazed at all the reports of incomplete effects.
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 20 December 2019 15:13 (four years ago) link
it's one of the aspects I'm most looking forward to tbh
― Simon H., Friday, 20 December 2019 15:14 (four years ago) link
2020 needed a showgirls
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 20 December 2019 15:24 (four years ago) link
If I live long enough to see a megabudget Hollywood film released to theaters that features even like a few seconds of an actor jumping around in front of a green screen while wearing a ping pong ball-festooned jumpsuit before the finished effects shot jerkily resumes, I think I could die happily right then and there.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 15:24 (four years ago) link
I'll be seeing Jumanji this weekend at my daughter's request. Daughter is into felines, but saw the Cats trailer and was appropriately put-off, thank god. She's still at an age where I want her to enjoy things because they are enjoyable, not because they are total travesties of cinema.
But my wife's mom occasionally recruits me to chaperone a learning-disabled relative to the cinema and that relative is a very big cat person. I'm going to casually introduce the topic while we're over there on Christmas Day and see where it leads. I'm intrigued enough to go see this in the theater if it's on someone else's dime.
― ☮ (peace, man), Friday, 20 December 2019 15:54 (four years ago) link
showcats otm!
― Banáná hÉireann (darraghmac), Friday, 20 December 2019 16:00 (four years ago) link
Daughter is into felines, but saw the Cats trailer and was appropriately put-off, thank god.
Similarly, much as I love a good pear, I somehow refrained from eating the half-rotten bosc I once saw bobbing in a public toilet.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 16:00 (four years ago) link
What if it was covered in vivid CGI fur?
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 20 December 2019 16:21 (four years ago) link
I'll be seeing Jumanji this weekend at my daughter's request.
as harmless childrens' action-comedies go this was p good btw
― Οὖτις, Friday, 20 December 2019 16:24 (four years ago) link
first (well, first recent one, i mean) was good
― Banáná hÉireann (darraghmac), Friday, 20 December 2019 16:26 (four years ago) link
These are surprising takes. I had assumed they were the hottest of trash.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 16:27 (four years ago) link
they are no CATS (2019)
― mark s, Friday, 20 December 2019 16:31 (four years ago) link
i love this movie so much, one day i will actually see it i guess probably
don't get me wrong I would never have watched it if my kid didn't wanna go see it (I mean, it's not Fantastic Mr. Fox) but it's amiable/pleasant and all the body-switching/actors-imitating-other-actors' delivery schtick is relatively charming. It's silly and low-stakes but it's fun. I admit I have a soft spot for Danny DeVito.
xps
― Οὖτις, Friday, 20 December 2019 16:35 (four years ago) link
Yeah, we saw the 2017 one recently and liked it pretty well as a movie to watch with the kid. And rated PG-13 for dick and boob jokes, which were cringey but also felt kinda refreshing, honestly. Not sure if those are super-common in PG-13s these days, but the last time I saw any were in Guardians of the Galaxy vol 2 and they just felt forced and lame.
― ☮ (peace, man), Friday, 20 December 2019 16:52 (four years ago) link
Tracking services are suggesting $175 million to $200 million for Rise of Skywalker (Disney is being even more cautious in predicting $160 million-plus)....Reviews are all-out bleak for Cats, from Universal, Working Title and Amblin Entertainment. Its Rotten Tomatoes score was hovering around 17 percent on Thursday evening, a career-worst for Hooper, whose directing credits include the Oscar-winning The King's Speech and Les Miserables.In a bold move, Cats is the first event pic daring to open against a modern-day Star Wars title.Tracking figures show the adaptation of the hit Broadway musical debuting to a modest $14 million to $17 million.
In a bold move, Cats is the first event pic daring to open against a modern-day Star Wars title.
Tracking figures show the adaptation of the hit Broadway musical debuting to a modest $14 million to $17 million.
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 20 December 2019 17:24 (four years ago) link
Honestly, more than I was expecting.
― Simon H., Friday, 20 December 2019 18:43 (four years ago) link
never underestimate the draw of rubbernecking
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 20 December 2019 18:43 (four years ago) link
a career-worst for Hooper, whose directing credits include the Oscar-winning The King's Speech and Les Miserables
― i chop up the orange and chomp on the inside of it (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 20 December 2019 18:44 (four years ago) link
14-17 million opening for CATS in this era of films just backing their way into 35-40 million openings is still p low.
― omar little, Friday, 20 December 2019 18:47 (four years ago) link
are there any images floating around of the rendering error that supposedly made it into the film?
― warn me about a lurking rake (One Eye Open), Friday, 20 December 2019 18:49 (four years ago) link
you just described every frame of the trailer iirc
― i chop up the orange and chomp on the inside of it (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 20 December 2019 18:53 (four years ago) link
TS Eliot would have liked Cats (2019 film) says his estate
Eliot himself, she said, would probably have approved. “We know he would have liked the lines because he wrote them. Then, he loved dance … his nickname at Harvard was Elbows Eliot, he loved dance so much. He also used to go to musical theatre all the time with [his wife] Valerie. So I can’t see how he wouldn’t have liked it, with all those things he loved being in one film. I think he would have had a sense of humour about it, he was very open-minded, he liked having his head blown. He was an unusual person and this is such an unusual thing.”Reihill acknowledged that “there’s always been so much derision about the musical and that’s carried over to the film” and that “seeing Judi Dench’s face covered in fur is going to startle you, of course”.But she said that Eliot’s widow Valerie “loved the musical and she knew him so well … If you take all those things he loved, they’re all in the film, and I like to imagine him sitting in the cinema with a smile on his face,” she said.
Reihill acknowledged that “there’s always been so much derision about the musical and that’s carried over to the film” and that “seeing Judi Dench’s face covered in fur is going to startle you, of course”.
But she said that Eliot’s widow Valerie “loved the musical and she knew him so well … If you take all those things he loved, they’re all in the film, and I like to imagine him sitting in the cinema with a smile on his face,” she said.
https://www.theguardian.com/books/2019/dec/19/ts-eliot-would-not-have-minded-cats-reviews-says-his-estate
― soref, Friday, 20 December 2019 18:59 (four years ago) link
I think it's fair to say that anyone who died prior to the advent of shitty CGI and who has subsequently been made aware of the existence of shitty CGI (by like say a psychic medium or the ghost of a latter-day decedent who described in vivid detail that one infamous scene with the Scorpion King) is thankful that they never had to experience shitty CGI with their own living eyes.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 19:45 (four years ago) link
Which is to posit that a miraculously-resurrected Eliot who bore witness to this celluloid abortion would likely scoop his eyes out of his skull in a fit of abject horror for what has become of humanity.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 19:47 (four years ago) link
We lost our minds when the train cat exploded into dust pic.twitter.com/dsXcvOmhVx— Kevin T. Porter (@KevinTPorter) December 20, 2019
genuinely stoked to see this now tbh
― Simon H., Friday, 20 December 2019 19:50 (four years ago) link
I think I'm gonna wait and see how many Razzies it wins. I mean I expect at least two but if it clinches four or more I'm totally there.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 19:53 (four years ago) link
if you wait that long it might already have been shamed out of theaters
― Simon H., Friday, 20 December 2019 19:54 (four years ago) link
"He was an unusual person and this is such an unusual thing”
^^^this is also why i will like it and also why you sad normies are missing out iirc
― mark s, Friday, 20 December 2019 19:56 (four years ago) link
I need to know that it's elicited Lonely Lady levels of excoriation before I plunk down my hard-earned money.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 19:56 (four years ago) link
I assume because of the season, I've been seeing a lot of images from the Grinch movie popping up lately. This movie is giving off very similar 'how could anyone involved who wasn't heavily intoxicated for the entire span of its production ever have thought this was anything but an irrefutable denunciation of the human act of creativity' vibes.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 20:00 (four years ago) link
if all the dollar/discount theaters in my area hadnt gone out of business this would 100% be a classic postholiday hangover cheapo matinee
― warn me about a lurking rake (One Eye Open), Friday, 20 December 2019 20:01 (four years ago) link
I wager that it's best experienced via bootleg download projected from an iPhone onto an alley wall.
― i was so hungry that i ate a hole cake entirely to myself (Old Lunch), Friday, 20 December 2019 20:11 (four years ago) link
Train cat has me puriently wanting a starlight express adaptation with the same direction and cgi tech. What could go wrong.
― American Fear of Pranksterism (Ed), Friday, 20 December 2019 20:12 (four years ago) link
― i chop up the orange and chomp on the inside of it (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 20 December 2019 20:13 (four years ago) link