heel bars are where you get keys cut also
― mark s, Thursday, 26 March 2020 16:32 (four years ago) link
need keys for locking up my huge stockpiles of toilet rolls, rice and lager ffs!
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 16:34 (four years ago) link
tell me more tell me more
One thing I think many British people may not understand is that the 'government will cover 80% of your salary if you can't work because of coronavirus' scheme is actually very similar to how regular unemployment benefit works in a lot of Europe— Jon Stone (@joncstone) March 26, 2020
― nashwan, Thursday, 26 March 2020 16:53 (four years ago) link
i for one welcome comrade covid-19’s efforts to ensure the uk’s regulatory alignment with the eu
― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 16:56 (four years ago) link
it's all these British mugs deserve for voting for tory cunts for over 40 years, they are so full of class-ridden masochistic self hatred they'd chod on prince Charles' toxic Covid 19 addled cock if he commanded them to by royal decree.
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:00 (four years ago) link
ilx’s lawyers have asked me to step in and make it clear that any and all previous allegations linking prince charles to forced oral sex remain unproven
― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:08 (four years ago) link
lol! when he talks about monstrous carbuncles to his servants he doesn't mean modern architecture!
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:10 (four years ago) link
Grim lol about the fact that, after 15 years of rampant demonisation, most of the country will be on benefits from next month.
― Matt DC, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:16 (four years ago) link
yeah but it’s different when I’M on benefits, not like THOSE dole-bludging scum
― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:17 (four years ago) link
the nu disease era curtain twitchers with benefits are looking out for people who have more than one walk/supermarket delivery/garden wank a week!
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:19 (four years ago) link
sorry for gratuitous crudeness, got a big booze-pile in today - started supping mid-aft.
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:29 (four years ago) link
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EUDVlBIWoAAU-tr?format=png&name=900x900
he's done it again!
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:37 (four years ago) link
who's the hideous mutant on the far side of the stairs!!? we're not in kansas any more!!
― mark s, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:40 (four years ago) link
BREAKING: Chancellor @RishiSunak announces HUGE support for self-employed - taxable grant worth 80% average monthly profits over last three years, up to max £2,500 a month.— Pippa Crerar (@PippaCrerar) March 26, 2020
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:46 (four years ago) link
cool to see pesto during the sunak press conference repeatedly describing this and other measures as a ‘bailout’ for taxpayers as opposed to, y’know, how a decent functioning society should always operate
― a struggle to make meat-snacking fit (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:54 (four years ago) link
lots of precariat/low-paid self-employed twitter are saying these measures are still inadequate/punitive to the poorest. Why am i not even slightly fucking surprised.
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:56 (four years ago) link
If big Johnny Mac was doing this, Bobby P’d be openly wondering if Princes Charles and Philip were well enough to rise from their respective sick and deathbeds to lead a coup.
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:56 (four years ago) link
will they do it off this year's tax return if I submit it in april? otherwise I'm going to get a completely inadequate amount. and I'm not really sure why? why needlessly punish people who have complicated work situations or are recently self employed?— joe (@cillanoir) March 26, 2020
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:57 (four years ago) link
The looming collision with the middle classes and Universal Credit is going to be painful for the middle-classes and potentially also for the goverment: https://t.co/U4ePEYjkB1— Stephen Bush (@stephenkb) March 26, 2020
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 17:59 (four years ago) link
The first is that that it doesn’t provide any support for people who became self-employed since April 2019, who are going to be funnelled towards universal credit and many of those who are receiving salary protection (both salaried and self-employed) likely will end up having to claim as a bridging measure.
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:00 (four years ago) link
The self-employed are generally proud people. Many will struggle with the thought of having to sign on for universal credit if they don't qualify / need help faster.— Paul Brand (@PaulBrandITV) March 26, 2020
unlike those fucking feckless benefits scum eh? cunt!
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:20 (four years ago) link
that is really something.
― Li'l Brexit (Tracer Hand), Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:24 (four years ago) link
My ex MP Paula Sheriff liked that comment as well! The fucked up dualities of some of these performatively *nice* Labour melts.
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:37 (four years ago) link
Surely all these chickens coming home to roost must be a potential new rona vector?
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:41 (four years ago) link
Actual lol
― stet, Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:43 (four years ago) link
Definitely laughed at Ed Davey tweeting a story about himself with the default share text
UK politician chides PM Johnson for spurning EU ventilator programme https://t.co/wsA4Jyv3GS— Ed Davey MP 🔶🇪🇺 #StayHomeSaveLives #ProtectNHS (@EdwardJDavey) March 26, 2020
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:53 (four years ago) link
lol when you have to do your own social media
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:53 (four years ago) link
I actually clicked to see who it was, assumed it was Moran or someone.
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:54 (four years ago) link
Looks like the UK is joining the EU ventilator scheme after all.
― Matt DC, Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:55 (four years ago) link
Wow they have a brain cell between them after all
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:57 (four years ago) link
BREXIT MEANS BREXIT
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 18:59 (four years ago) link
They're claiming they never saw the correspondence, when it seems more likely they buried it because they thought it would be politically embarrassing.
― Matt DC, Thursday, 26 March 2020 19:00 (four years ago) link
I VOTED TO SUFFOCATE
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 19:01 (four years ago) link
Very reassured that “we are too incompetent to read email” is the best excuse they could come up with
― stet, Thursday, 26 March 2020 19:57 (four years ago) link
so my entire neighbourhood appears to be applauding the nhs rn
― strangely hookworm but they manage ream shoegaze poetry (imago), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:00 (four years ago) link
jolly good show
anybody applauding the NHS who didn't vote Labour last election should be strung up
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:03 (four years ago) link
Yeah I just looked out the window and nearly cringed my colon clean out
― or something, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:05 (four years ago) link
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:03 (one minute ago) bookmarkflaglink
this is precisely my own sentiment
― strangely hookworm but they manage ream shoegaze poetry (imago), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:05 (four years ago) link
I forgot about the NHS clap-off until I heard some noise outside and curtain-twitched in my disapproving middle-aged way
surprised people did it, thankful it was brief
― a passing spacecadet, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:08 (four years ago) link
Yep, two weeks behind Italy
― koogs, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:09 (four years ago) link
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-52056534
100 new deaths in 24 hours.
― ShariVari, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:10 (four years ago) link
All the noise around here is coming from the *posh* parts that like their gammon juice like their whiskey.. Erm cant think of some appropriate witticism there but I have filmic evidence and it was fucking nauseating
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:10 (four years ago) link
i've got music on but i couldn't hear fuck all, tbf my street is probably half people at work and half olds
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:13 (four years ago) link
Ah sweet ITV2 have got Contagion on tonight
― Let's kill the Queen and be legends (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:16 (four years ago) link
lol! have never seen the Soderbergh one - always associate the name with the 90's one with Dustin hoffman? i think
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:21 (four years ago) link
my stressed good friend who works in nhs admin was moved and cheered by it in her street, she sent the whatsapp group a little video
homerton mutual whatsapp also enthused tbh, solidarity takes awkward and contradictory forms ppl
― mark s, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:21 (four years ago) link
Someone I know posted the hashtag with a shot of the NHS logo from the 2012 opening ceremony.
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:21 (four years ago) link
That one was called outbreak! xp
― felt jute gyte delete later (wins), Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:22 (four years ago) link
ah right yeah!
― calzino, Thursday, 26 March 2020 20:23 (four years ago) link