Are we sure it's not just a massive bong?
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:25 (four years ago) link
This was the topic most full of cunts - https://twitter.com/search?q=%22Hope%20Boris%22&src=trend_click
― Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Sunday, 5 April 2020 bookmarkflaglink
Well yes I'm sure if you search it like that ofc you are going to get plenty of get well etc. But note the odd threats and aggression if you are not toeing the line.
― xyzzzz__, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:27 (four years ago) link
big ben MUST bong for boris
― bam! Free bees! (bizarro gazzara), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:27 (four years ago) link
selfish bastard needs to stop taking up space if he's going to die soon anyway
― aaaaeeeeeeoooooooowwww (Left), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:29 (four years ago) link
beautiful pic.twitter.com/2bw2XwVTJO— NumberGoDown (@DownNumber) April 5, 2020
― xyzzzz__, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:31 (four years ago) link
pic.twitter.com/UBpCT1VBBh— Loki (@Lokinash06) April 5, 2020
― calzino, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:32 (four years ago) link
Can't spell Downing Street without DNR
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:32 (four years ago) link
Guardian suggesting the 17.5m tests they’d bought to check whether people had previously had coronavirus might be about 50% accurate.
― ShariVari, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:37 (four years ago) link
https://www.theguardian.com/law/2020/apr/05/retired-senior-judge-sir-john-laws-dies-after-contracting-coronavirus
John "Cummings' uncle" Laws down now, they're dropping like fucking flies!
― threnody for the victims of alan shearer (Matt #2), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:37 (four years ago) link
― bam! Free bees! (bizarro gazzara), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:40 (four years ago) link
(xp) Tough for working class anti-establishment figure Dominic Cummings to lose his uncle, retired senior judge, Sir John Laws.
― Did somebody just say eat? (Tom D.), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:41 (four years ago) link
This could wipe out a generation of cunts, clearing space for more cunts to fill the gap
― threnody for the victims of alan shearer (Matt #2), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:42 (four years ago) link
truly our most reliable renewable resource
― Wuhan!! Got You All in Check (Camaraderie at Arms Length), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:46 (four years ago) link
me rn
https://pbs.twimg.com/profile_images/933394218323759104/fkdxldtq_400x400.jpg
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:47 (four years ago) link
irl lol
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:48 (four years ago) link
the rona doesn't give a fuck about class lines or race, that's basically the only reason it's managed to bring the whole show down. When Cummings said if some pensioners die then too bad he didn't mean his uncle... ohh the humanity!
― calzino, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:50 (four years ago) link
Would this count as death by misadventure?
― ShariVari, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:51 (four years ago) link
Pretty sure the rona is still disproportionately killing poorer people here and around the world tbh
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:51 (four years ago) link
yeah i was thinking it might take out disproportionately many republicans in the US because of where they tend to get their news/who the governor of their state is, etc., and then i remembered how the world works.
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:53 (four years ago) link
Indeed, Boris very much letting the side down here.
― Did somebody just say eat? (Tom D.), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:53 (four years ago) link
xxp
I meant in terms of who it infects, of course posh bastards get better medical treatment and the finest bespoke ventilators!
― calzino, Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:55 (four years ago) link
nah I knew what you meant bud just clarifying inequality under capitalism kills people
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 21:57 (four years ago) link
everyone tweeting good wishes to boris johnson with a union jack in their name looks like this pic.twitter.com/4ptWIb5ckP— ▀▀▀▀▀▀ (@immolations) April 5, 2020
― calzino, Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:01 (four years ago) link
Not far off it. My sister posted that he was in hospital - on Facebook - just for news, not that she cares about Boris Johnson, and she had four of these hideous fat balding ex-mods she knows, who are all Rangers fans and voted Tory, posting crying emojis *boke*
― Did somebody just say eat? (Tom D.), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:06 (four years ago) link
conspiracy theory: Johnson's already dead, but the announcement has been held back to avoid undue numbers of people partying in the park over the weekend
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:08 (four years ago) link
What’s the protocol on days of national ‘mourning’ here? Would be a shame if it overlapped with Easter.
― ShariVari, Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:12 (four years ago) link
Shame on everyone, you might not personally like Boris Johnson but imagine his unborn child growing up without a fath-
― Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:12 (four years ago) link
tbf he would have died anyway
― plax (ico), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:20 (four years ago) link
Scottish CMO has resigned
― stet, Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:21 (four years ago) link
National day of mourning is a tricky one, something seems not quite right about only being able to watch online as they yeet him in a routemaster and drive it into the thames
― Dadjokke (Sgt. Biscuits), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:21 (four years ago) link
Just thinking about the state funeral via cctv with the ceremonial duties carried out by a jcb and two guys in full hazmat kit
― ymo sumac (NickB), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:22 (four years ago) link
Crashing through a wall of polystyrene bricks with Goodbye Bojo written on it.
― Did somebody just say eat? (Tom D.), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:25 (four years ago) link
who? the queen?
― plax (ico), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:29 (four years ago) link
I don't know if she has a licence to drive a JCB, but I'm sure she'd do her duty if called on by the nation.
― Did somebody just say eat? (Tom D.), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:31 (four years ago) link
Day 10 is the average day when the severe and critical cases get hospitalised, I’ve just remembered. Also, what “tests” for this require hospitalisation? You can do oxygen sat at home. Chest x-rays, I guess, but that’s outpatient stuff, surely. Does seem plausible that he could be properly ill.
― stet, Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:33 (four years ago) link
I suppose this might make the dozy dumbfucks half this country consists of more careful about social distancing etc, probably not though
― la légende d'beer (Matt #2), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:35 (four years ago) link
au contrite, I shall be running around shaking hands with every Tory I can find
― Kier today, Dom tomorrow (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:38 (four years ago) link
Contrite? wtf spellcheck?
Yeah “tests” really only makes sense if they’re ruling something else out. I got my oximeter on eBay. Did they say what hospital he went to?
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:42 (four years ago) link
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:47 (four years ago) link
I feel like stet’s hunch is right, though, because I don’t know why the PM would go to a hospital unless he absolutely needed to. I’m sure no 10 has a medical team at the very least? He could have pneumonia.
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:49 (four years ago) link
While No 10 did not say what tests Johnson would undergo in hospital, experts said they would be likely to focus on assessing how the prime minister’s lungs, heart and other organs were responding to the virus.“Doctors will be monitoring important vital signs such as oxygen saturations,” said Dr Rupert Beale, who heads the cell biology of infection laboratory at the Francis Crick Institute in London.“They will also check blood tests to see what the immune response to the virus looks like, and to assess liver and kidney function. They will perform an electrocardiogram to check the heart. More sophisticated tests may include a CT scan of the chest to get an accurate picture of the lungs.”
― 𝔠𝔞𝔢𝔨 (caek), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:50 (four years ago) link
Keegan.jpg
― extremely Dutch coughing sound (gyac), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:50 (four years ago) link
Just hide the keys from Phillip though.
― Did somebody just say eat? (Tom D.), Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:56 (four years ago) link
more importantly hide the kids from Prince Andrew
― calzino, Sunday, 5 April 2020 22:59 (four years ago) link
Imagine being the doctor expected to treat Boris. Imagine being on shift and they wheel him in and youre expected to look after him.
― boxedjoy, Sunday, 5 April 2020 23:20 (four years ago) link
brexit and remain diehards on twitter currently united in repulsive display of toff arse licking, moral outrage over anything resembling humour
― aaaaeeeeeeoooooooowwww (Left), Monday, 6 April 2020 00:29 (four years ago) link
So if he is proper ill then he'll be out of action for a while (assuming the fucker survives). In other words, he'll avoid the peak of the pandemic and will get to swan back in when the death toll starts to drop a little, and all the gammons will be nodding sagely and letting you know they always though Bozza would sort it out.
If he does cark it though I suggest a flaming pyre floating down the Thames, like the end of Return of the Jedi mashed into the end of Aguirre: Wrath of God.
― la légende d'beer (Matt #2), Monday, 6 April 2020 00:34 (four years ago) link
https://i.redd.it/86h6k4hh72r41.png
― bam! Free bees! (bizarro gazzara), Monday, 6 April 2020 06:49 (four years ago) link