Quieting the Imps in Your Brainz

i don't often have these impulses either, aside from the occassional road rage moment and the aforementioned "horny wolf" perv moments

x-post Maybe you just need to nurture your imps to prevent them from plotting against you and eventually causing you to think Henry is communicating messages to you like that dog upthread did to Berkowitz.

I'm sorry you guys don't have normally sensitive and social brains. :-(

"what would happen if I pantsed this dude, right now"

(xpost) if we did would we be hanging around on ILX?

yeah i dont know most of henrys secret messages seem to be things like "lets eat shoes!" and those are fairly crushable on the impulse control scale.

i have the urge to reveal many examples, even though it wouldn't be too hard for someone to figure out who I am IRL and find this post and get upset. I'm gonna resist the urge ... or wait until I can come up with something non-damaging.

i have succumbed to the "hey! lets go pee in the back yard!" suggestion once or twice so far tho xpost

yeah i dont know most of henrys secret messages seem to be things like "lets eat shoes!" and those are fairly crushable on the impulse control scale.

― 5:00 manatee showing (jjjusten), Tuesday, July 7, 2009 2:22 PM (1 minute ago) Bookmark

Awwwwww Henry.

wait is henry the dog or did you name your imp

I think the imps are different from my rage under certain conditions, or elmo's road rage, or emotional triggers. It's like...not an emotional thing, it's strictly the rational brain going "what if what if what if" just to see what happens.

sarahel are you barack obama

"i frequently want to box joe biden about the ears"

^^^haha i wondered this too

I think there's a big difference between having fleeting thoughts about doing abnormal things (which I suspect is the case for most people) and having uncontrollable urges to do the same. Plenty of times I've thought "what if I just ran into that restaurant, grabbed some food off someone's plate, and walked out?" -- but I generally just think "haha, that would be crazy" or else I go as far as to imagine the IRL consequences and then think "oh, bad idea, right." In either case, I've put it out of my head within seconds. For some people, though, I imagine the thoughts aren't so easily suppressed, and that's when it gets into mental illness.

wait is henry the dog or did you name your imp

You don't understand, Henry is the name of his dog!

Imagine what kind of imps the president must get on a minute-by-minute basis.

"What if I just strode to the podium and started screaming at the top of my lungs?"

Laruel OTM. I think what Hooes was describing and Suzy too are more just emotional responses to situations.

Also JayMC - exactly. That's what makes these normal and not signs of mental illness.

Here's an example of another one of my imps . . .

Pushing someone in front of a train. Obviously I'm not crazy and I wouldn't actually do this but I will admit that when standing close the the tracks in addition to imagining throwing myself in front of the train I've wondered what would happen if I, you know, gave someone else a little shove. The thought is fleeting and it doesn't happen every single time I'm in that situation. Furthermore it's merely a reflection of my normally sensitive, social brain SO STOP JUDGING ME OK!?

Hooes!!

"what if i just pooped, right here, on the sidewalk, what would happen"

i have a friend who has just pooped on the sidewalk. Nothing happened.

He was with a girl he'd just met, and said wait here, walked round the corner and shat on the pavement. He wiped his ass with a sock. It was 7am on a Sunday in a residential street in Glasgow.

"what if i just started referring to reporters as 'poopypants 1' and 'poopypants 2' etc for the rest of this presser"

"My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."

what if I replied to all my work email only with chris_hansen.jpg or lolcat pics?

I also think that these imps usually occur in situations where there is a strict standard of behavior that is expected like a dinner party, public transportation, etc.

church . . .

work ...

yep

(btw - since yesterday someone thought I was serious when I said I was watching 2.5 men in my underwear while eating cheetos, I'd like to make it clear that I'm not actually ever going to throw myself or anyone else in front of a train so don't call the cops on me ok guys?)

To talk animatedly about air disasters to strangers when flying.

I wouldn't mind this ... whenever I got on a plane, I'd always spend at least half an hour contemplating it crashing. The last time I got on a plane, they asked the routine question about some unknown person giving you something/putting something in your luggage, and I joked that "yes, and it looked like it might be a bomb." This was in 2000. I'm thoroughly afraid that I'd say or do something inappropriate for air travel post 9/11 and get in some serious shit.

When I'm at rock shows I often have the urge to jump onstage and tackle the frontman.

if the band sucks, I have the urge to get onstage and tell them to stop playing right now.

Once or twice at free jazz shows I have wanted to shout FOR FUCKS SAKE PLAY A TUNE

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v165/noodle_vague/07-07-2009200342.jpg

Not sure if that's slightly too small or much too big.

Once or twice at free jazz shows I have wanted to shout FOR FUCKS SAKE PLAY A TUNE

That's how I feel at noise shows too. It's perfectly normal.

xp Laurel -- seriously. Though I was at a Lightning Bolt where it sounded like they were playing "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star"

Things I hear about Glasgow make me alternately sure that I will love it/be terrified by it.

Noodle - that Bad Thoughts pg is pretty great.

Yeah, I was reading it too. Quite amusingly done.

CHICKEN LOLLIES!!!

That Bad Thoughts page is making me think I need my vision checked again ;_;

If you open it in a new tab you can enlarge it Abs!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E32GsJpZAtQ
^^^ now imagine those mad thoughts spoken by this guy

No, enlarged is how I can't read it. I mean, I can't read it small either but that's not what's making me worry.

If you open it in a new tab you can enlarge it Abs!

I, too, was wondering how everyone was able to read it!

x-post - it's still small but if I put my face pretty close the the screen I can read it . . . yes, that looks are ridiculous as it sounds.

i feel the imps a lot when im standing at a great height and also A LOT when i'm using a large knife like "well what if i just felt the sudden urge to slit my wrists"

those are fleeting in a way but i really do get terrified that i'm going to let slip a secret of a friend in front of that friend in front of people that matter - one of the more recent ones is casually mentioning who my friend voted for in front of his father - just terrified of stuff like that

when i was working at a call center i felt this all the time too - like what if i happened to say the n-word to this black woman that im speaking to, things like that - always mildly freaked me out

BTW - Asked someone at work about this earlier today and she brought up the jumping/pushing someone in front of a train as her most common example.