queen elizabeth II

meanwhile back in the correct world:

My son, Perceval, since learning of Her Majesty's death has been locked away in his art studio taking his grief out on the canvas. What he has painted is, quite frankly, one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. He has called it "HM and Harambe, best of friends" pic.twitter.com/U7C1LPsk0R

— Professor Kelvin Knox (@2012Studies) September 10, 2022

pic.twitter.com/fYHcxLJsW9

— David Bowie Official (@DavidBowieReal) September 10, 2022

loool

So many lolz

Well, that was unexpected.

[sound up]#AccessionCouncil #KingCharlesIII pic.twitter.com/epHMgh6Ijf

— Nick Harvey (@mrnickharvey) September 10, 2022

lol v good

checking in on the college of arms i see that the post of rouge croix pursuivant is currently vacant, i think we shd appoint comrade alph and realise his monarchist dreams

Signalling at an aide through clenched teeth to move something out of his way pic.twitter.com/SSe8j8VeUz

— Emma Devlin (@theactualemma) September 10, 2022

it's a miracle that these sub-human lizard people actually live so long and don't get murdered by their staff

suspect that elderly tantrum-boy here is gnna turn out to be very bad at a lot of similar things the recently departed was in fact better at

stoked for it tbh lol, he is a very disappointed man and that's not going to change

just read that rumour that his staff have keep boiling eggs and throwing them out when he goes for a walk. If there isn't a perfect boiled one ready on demand when he get's back he throws a strop.

forget when or where i read this, years and years ago, but he's an absolute testy stickler for being called YOUR HIGHNESS, which is a word whose insecure silliness just screams at you as soon as you break it down

I read ages ago that someone else brushes his teeth for him, and I always thought that couldn't be true, but looking at him today I could believe it.

I’ve read somewhere that he has a servant to hold his peen while he pees!

I’ve read somewhere that he has a servant to hold his peen while he pees!

also comrade alph iirc

😭😭😭

on my morning walk noticed one lone house in the neighborhood flying the union jack and loled grimly to myself

spare a thought for that saddo pom

was it half mast tho

I’m not gonna sit here and apologize for most any of this nonsense but I’d like to say a simple “actually that’s kind of sweet” offering to the Twitter thing upthread about the bees, which is an ancient and basically mythological English tradition https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Telling_the_bees

nope, full mast… hmm… maybe they were celebrating? tip o the hat if so

ok telling the bees is hilarious i love it

it's a pan-european tradition!!

and for maximum chaos: "Bees could also be invited to the funeral.[5][6]"

it’s downright dotty

meanwhile the bees are like WE DONT CARE WE’RE BLOODY BEES

they like to feel informed

what a time to get killfiled :(

meanwhile the bees are like WE DONT CARE WE’RE BLOODY BEES

Nah, that's too waspish for bees.

Patter not chronic enough

🤨

I was taking a dump during the announcement. It felt wrong and disrespectful to continue it, so as a mark of respect, I stopped. I will resume after my ten days of mourning.

thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

out of respect

Johnny Cash meets the Queen in his dreams, writes "The Man Comes Around" afterward pic.twitter.com/sJrwyMfPzP

— Bowiesongs (@bowiesongs) September 8, 2022

Limmy's favourite memory of our Queen pic.twitter.com/sNoKmbHzCT

— LimmyTwitchClipsPlus (@LTCPLUS) September 10, 2022

one of our managers came into the shop today and told me to remove Tom Bowers book 'Revenge'( his Harry + Meghan vs the rest of the monarchy biography) from display because it was disrespectful at the current time and was likely to cause offence!! surprised I wasn't instructed to burn it tbh. bit of a cheek considering we currently display Rushdie's ' The Satanic Verses' on the same shop floor which I would guess offends far more people( ie more than zero)than some hack biography. still guess it offends people who aren't as important. lol cancel culture actually exists for once.

of course 30 mins later some women came in and asked if we had it, so I sold her a copy.

Nice.

Astonishing figure @BBCNews just cited - that a third of the UK might have met the Queen, given all her efforts to meet the public

— Bronwen Maddox (@bronwenmaddox) September 10, 2022

And every person she met started a band.

lmao

meeting the queen should be a euphemism for jerking off or taking a dump or something for if it’s not already

Meet the queen
Feed the tree

I've a good friend who is a hardcore oldschool punk, very left wing, who declared on twitter they'd be following the 10 day mourning period seriously. I have to say I was really surprised. I dont think theyre a monarchist, just feeling very English? (hving been born in the UK).

I'm apathetically anti-monarchist as any decent Australian should be imnsho, but I decided not to have Opinions online bcs my mother will prob be offended. She's of that era who crammed the streets to glimpse at queenie waving as she went by and all that crap.

Other than being a monarch, protecting the monarchy, and thus perpetuating the monarchy and all its pathologies, I'm not aware of any particularly egregious sins that can be laid directly at her feet. Sure, had she chosen she could have been a forceful advocate for the well being of her subjects, but she chose instead to be a harmless figurehead feigning a kind of maternal benevolence. I'm not sure that merits hatred of her, so much as mild mockery or complete indifference.

She paid 12 million pounds to make credible allegations of her son's sexual assault of a minor go away.
She never apologised for atrocities committed in her name in colonial Africa (from where the Crown Jewels were stolen, incidently).
She interfered in the legislative process several times to get laws changed to favour her or her estates.

I agree the first of the actions you cited absolutely merits anyone's loathing, contempt and anger. It's enough to cite it alone.

But as for the second and third? They are common as dirt among the wealthy and powerful. Hell, most of them never apologize for crimes they personally committed or directly authorized, let alone those committed "in their name".

So we should give her a pass? Fuck that. Fuck anyone who does it.

Yes. We should not give her a pass. Great idea. I am now revoking her pass even as I write this.

It's possible for world leaders to apologise for the wrongs done by their state. Chirac apologised for France's role in the rounding up of Jews in the Second World War. The Australian PM apologised to Aboriginal people who had been forcibly removed from their families. But nary a peep out of Queen Liz about the atrocities of the Mau Mau uprising, about slavery, about anything.

never buying a motherboard from amazon uk ever again what is this shit pic.twitter.com/zeiNP9rxTK

— stickfab (@stckfb) September 10, 2022

NEW: Antigua & Barbuda PM, Gaston Browne, has said following the Queen’s death he will call for a referendum on the country becoming a republic within three years.https://t.co/gzb7k9jK1c pic.twitter.com/MPrb71LPgV

— Nads White (@Nadine_Writes) September 11, 2022

Love this, please never stop.

BBC News just read out a card from a 12 year old to the dead queen saying "I find the fact that you were working in your final days so great." 🫠

— lol (@MediocreDave) September 12, 2022