Let's bitch about our stupid, annoying co-workers

Xpost Lol in my old job, I used to have people in this one department do this to me all the time - until I went to the department head and complained and she told her team to stop doing this.

Person who did it to me today is the boss's boss who I'm friends with and all I can think is "she misremembered asking me to rewrite the PowerPoint as opposed to just capturing specific changes"

Xpost yeah exactly. Hell they might even forget about it

lol apparently some of these items were requested in emails in a separate thread from the original thread assigning me the work, so basically there were three separate threads about the same one assignment and I was supposed to keep all that together while missing 12 of 16 hours on Monday/Tuesday due to dad being in hospital (which they knew). lolz....

my boss was better at his job before he was my boss.

next week he has me leading a class solo, at the same time he wants me to supervise two classes, and prep another. the only day I'm not teaching one is Monday. I told him there's no way, esp since the BIs in India usually take cabs to and from the office at specific times that they pre-book so I can't meet with them before or after class. true, I didn't bring it up until now, but I was on vacation until yesterday and before I left for vacay, I was supposed to have a partner to teach it w/ me, which didn't materialize.

i feel like my boss's boss keeps secretly taking him aside and giving him feedback cos some of his aloofness is impacting her too.

Ugh, it's like something about turning into a boss, or getting more "boss" responsibilities just makes people worse.

Not really a complaint about a specific person, but there's been this really weird and stark turn over the past month or so at my place of employment. Not internal to my department, but whenever I reach out to people/teams in other departments, I'm surprised by how often I've been met recently with defensiveness, antagonism or sometimes outright hostility. It had gotten to the point where I was really second guessing nearly every communication I sent out, wondering if I was somehow unconsciously shaping this sort of response and kept coming up blank. It was a relief to finally catch up with a few other people in my department yesterday and learn they've been experiencing the same exact thing. My suspicion is that it all comes back to my recently departed boss, who treated other people with such scorn and insane, conspiratorial accusations that he's tainted our entire team by association. While it's good to know it wasn't just me and I wasn't somehow inadvertently pissing people off, it sucks to feel like I'm spending half my time "fighting" with people ostensibly on the same team as me and working towards a common goal.

it sucks to feel like I'm spending half my time "fighting" with people ostensibly on the same team as me and working towards a common goal.

ugh, yeah ... that feeling sucks and i've been dealing with that too. my coworker has been the main one dealing with it, as relatively early on in this project, the leader of the project (who works for the client that hired us) didn't want me involved too much in it ... my suspicion (and my coworker's) is that the reason was because i'm "in finance" and know enough about her work that i could be "a threat" or "a challenge" ... and I was like, "hey, okay, I'll hang back, no problem." ... this was a couple years ago, and recently, there are problems and defensiveness and complaints about "underperforming" being leveled at my coworker by the project leader and ... her leadership is contributing to the problems. Like, her decisions are making his job harder. And ... last week, I had to do some spreadsheet stuff for the project (which included reviewing stuff that she had done) and ... she is also "underperforming" (in that there are some obvious mistakes in her work, and things that she could have explained much more clearly that she didn't that led to delays, etc) ... but I'm like, "Let's just cut everyone on this project a lot of slack because we are doing something complicated and unusual and we all are learning as we go. The fact we've even gotten this far is amazing."

xp There is substantial research that having power reduces people's ability to empathize with others. It makes actual physiological changes in our brain chemistry.

what kind of power are you talking about?

Having authority over others. Having high status. Being a "boss."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/neuroscience-in-everyday-life/202006/the-brain-under-the-influence-power

https://i.imgur.com/7ot9XuN.jpg

my boss and I had a 1 on 1 where he had nothing short of wonderful things to say about how I was essentially the unofficial third manager of the team (I'd say 'pay me' except as he pointed out weirdly, I make more than him...lol).

I am triple booked this week (due to him, as previously pointed out), so I decided to get creative. I wake up early to record my prep sessions for my trainees training next week (who have both done this before), and ask them to reach out with any questions after watching. I'm recording bits and pieces of the classes I'm supposed to be supervising so I can watch them later for observation. and then of course I'm teaching all day. (all this while dad's in the hospital still - ugh).

so of fucking course a complaint about one of the facilitators comes in today. I can't possibly handle that while teaching a class so I forwarded it to my manager with an email that basically said "enjoy, this is your problem" in clouded business-speak. look I can be creative as anybody but I'm not THAT good at multi-tasking.

in one of my classes, they replaced the lead facilitator twice, giving me only Monday to get the new person ready to go before class started Tuesday. lol

my co-worker is supposed to be on vacation this week. it's much easier to deal with an unresponsive co-worker when they are supposed to be on vacation and not expected to respond.

an instructor and a learner are both accusing each other of being rude and both insisting the class agreed with them that they were right.

we are officially back in 4th grade.

(in this case though, we did further digging, and the learner appears to be a toxic person who disrupts proceedings any time they don't like something, then goes scampering to their manager when they get asked to stop)

Emailed my department chair three times about the same issue, a somewhat urgent one for me as it regards class load and pay in the fall, and haven’t received a response. One email in April, one in May, and another last Friday.

I am going to text him this Friday, but feel as if that, too, will be ignored.

send an email with return receipt, and then an email with the subject "If you reject the return receipt request and read this email and ignore it, I will swallow your soul (EOM)" and no body

there is a dark comedy to be made about this one place I started working (again) ...

i've read a couple fiction books about office culture/life that feel like are inspired to similar workplaces to some of y'all (currently reading And Then We Came To the End)

we should make a movie that only 3 of us would appreciate about this

got asked to give feedback on a set of modules, said I probably couldn't get to it (because I'm slammed), so they of course extended deadline rather than just use the feedback of the other two.

well, I'm glad they did because the other reviewers let two quiz questions with COMPLETELY INCORRECT answers listed go by without a single note.

i get one person missing something but how did two people?

xp lol -- my best friend works in that capacity for a large corporation (designing courseware and tests to evaluate/assess competence) and -- from what he tells me, the fact that two people missed it is ... lol "par for the course"

also quizzes/test questions that are stupid and badly written that numerous people who are his bosses don't grasp are "not good"

no one cares and if the trainees fuck up by following the course literally, management will either never notice or put it on them, despite the fact they were trained wrong

the game remains the same, it’s not like we’re training the C-suite and even if you did, they’d just fire you if they fucked up something where you trained them correctly

a bit cynical this week, sorry

someone will inevitably decide it's crucial that the wheel get reinvented in a year or two

IRS changed the regulations for withholding changes for ongoing Pension annuity payments this year. I updated our training guide for facilitators to change the exercises to incorporate this, spent a lot of time doing it.

someone randomly posted a new version of this guide a month ago that completely reverted every single one of my changes, which I only found out today as they started to go over this section.

i swear to god....

i got to hear more from my friend about his stupid annoying co-workers in training/accreditation -- and you are not alone ...

still no response from my department chair

wish them happy father's day lol

I’m texting his personal number tomorrow. I think there may be some political stuff happening in the department to which I’m not privy, and which might be keeping him otherwise occupied.

that's probably true ... it's the classic "I don't know what to tell you, so I am not responding" tactic that is characteristic of bureaucratic cultures everywhere

i just took the most massive detour out of work, a really laborious long route round, to avoid bumping into the CEO and a consultant who i could see further down the way. as a consequence of this ended up also having to wait by the corner of a building “checking my phone” to avoid some other not really that stupid or annoying co-workers with whom i’d just said i couldn’t go out for a drink due to needing to get home (a lie, i just didn’t want to go).

being an adult is grebt

I do that all the time w/ neighbors I don't want to get caught up in a chat with

live on a terrace so you just tend to bump into each other. one of them is an extremely colourless man who keeps ambushing me with v moribund conversation as if we’re stuck at a wedding or funeral. the other side is fine. we talked about shoes just yesterday.

want to hear from table how it went with the chair!

are we all sitting down for this?

he's probably got a lot on his plate.

i hope they finally folded

He apologized and then told me I was correct about a department debate that took place earlier this year. I’m still trying to find a way to not teach there this fall.

knives out?

Minor complaint because he's an otherwise great guy so far, but a relatively new person in our office is the sloooooooooooooooooooowest talker.

oh geeeeeez, there was a guy like that who was the property manager/super at one of our client sites (he still is, I think, but I am not involved in that project in the same capacity as I was 2 years ago) ... between him and my extremely verbose co-worker, every conversation took way longer than I felt necessary.

Yeah, every time he comes over to ask a question I know there's 15 minutes of my day gone.

meanwhile, at another job, they received grant funding so that they can pay volunteers to staff/manage events at the space, which is good because they've always had trouble retaining good volunteers. Paying people helps with retention.

One of the volunteers who was feeling burnt out suddenly, with the promise of pay, is more enthusiastic to work on events. I'll call this volunteer, Volunteer A.
When news circulated about this grant funding and event volunteers getting paid, a volunteer who had quit last fall, Volunteer B, suddenly resurfaces and says, "I would be willing to come back and work events if I got paid." ... Volunteer B had been paid last summer for some events work.

And of course, the reason for posting this, is that Volunteer A and Volunteer B don't get along ... or if they do, it's totally surface-level, because they shit-talk one another to me. Volunteer B believes that Volunteer A is incompetent and irresponsible. Volunteer A believes that Volunteer B is "not all that" and exaggerates their degree of skill and value, and is also mean.

They are both adults. It reminds me that adults often exhibit "childish" behavior.

Yeah, while I've always encountered adults that act like children over the years, I've run into a significantly higher number of them since working in an academia adjacent job.

Meanwhile, I've now had the same coworker twice call me when I'm in a meeting, leave no voicemail and immediately text me to call him "as soon as I possibly can". Both times when I've called him back, it was to tell me that he is about to send me an email.

Good grief, just send me the damned email.

it makes me wonder how they have been trained/cultured to communicate like that? As in, why don't they just send the email? Is it a weird thing about this one person or is there some culture where their behavior is the norm?

Volunteer A will text me asking for my advice about what to say in emails to other people about things that I am not actually involved in and aren't really "my problem" ... and I'm nice about it, like, I don't want to be an asshole, but ... unless it's some highly fraught issue or something technical or legal where specific wording and phrasing are actually crucial? ... Why can't people just write their own damn emails and send them like nbd ... idgi

It's certainly not a cultural thing that I've encountered here, maybe he brought it from an old job. And neither time was like he was trying to give me a heads up about bad news, both times they were just informational emails. It's weird.

it would drive me up the wall ... i would end up doing the thing where i would ignore communication from this person except for the actual emails, and then only respond to those. ... as in, if that was my preferred mode of communication and the most productive form of communication.

that call to alert a forthcoming (?!) email thing is insane

I learned that some coworkers prefer if you mention you're going to invite them to a meeting and that's a new one to me? Just schedule it at a sane time and put enough info in the invite for me to draw a conclusion of why I'm being invited and what's going to be discussed