Blue Saturday

Sometimes when I’m half awake I think of a pleasant memory from 20 years ago and it puts me in a nice relaxed state and I fall back asleep

i wonder if we can all do this but forget that we can do it when we're too focused on the downers

Houellebecq wrote in one of his worst novels when ruminating on nostalgia that the present is like an "abscess of suffering" we have to drag about with us, caught between the infinities of happiness and peace that are the past and the future. It was one of them beautifully concise lines of writing that rung a bell with me at the time and stuck with me, wasn't so sure about him including the future in this though!

Now I think it's better to have nothing to say, but it's still a tremulous pleasure to watch your moods drift by

to bed almost exactly 12 hours after getting out of it.

Is that a good thing? Sounds nice to me. I always go to sleep later than I intend to

not when it's out of boredom.

been looking forwards to it since Tuesday and then nothing.

Boredom?

it's just too beautiful here today, it's fucking awful tbh

like actually painfully lovely

think i'm a lot better equipped to deal with dull grey tedium, feel like i need to watch videos of some miserable pissy rain to calm myself down

I should go and catch the sun while it's still around but y'know

yeah definitely do it, don't know what it's like round your way but it is really wonderful out there. there's something about the beauty of it though, you feel like you need to make the most of it but you know it'll all slip through your fingers anyway

Well I'm all too familiar with that feeling so probably no different today. Feels like a lot of work dragging myself off the settee and putting outside clothes on tho

yeah there is that. probably a good day to take a new book for a walk, get out and about but still have something to hide in

think i'm a lot better equipped to deal with dull grey tedium, feel like i need to watch videos of some miserable pissy rain to calm myself down

yes, exactly that. can definitely feel buddhism calling me back

Hope you're doing OK, koogs. Sending good vibes & hoping the ennui lifts soon.

(I just realised this reply is a week late, but, y'know. Hoping it's already lifted, but if not, all that stuff, still.)

Drank too many ipas last night and was in bed until 5 today. Then got up and went over to the coffee shop and it was really nice

beautiful days get me too esp if i'm a little down