thread for sarahel

As am I.

What a piece of work is a man! How overbearing in conversation, how intolerable in vanity!

I felt very proud to be his first ex-girlfriend that he was on speaking terms with post-breakup.

we were close friends first, and the relationship really should have stayed that way, tbh.

I have a couple exes that still like me ok. I have a few that really, really don't.

no interest with being friends with exes

It's always better to get out before they hate you deeply.

before me, he made not-speaking-to-his-exes a matter of principle. When I found out he was getting married (years after we broke up), I was pretty shocked. He had trouble getting close to someone and not becoming seriously contemptuous of them.

really do not agree with that principal, reason they're exes afaics

meant to say disagree

double negative yo!

My contempt of people is constantly being tempered by my need for them. So you make choices.

I think he probably just grew up, honestly. Some of the emails he's sent me about his wife, definitely seem like the contempt thing hasn't gone away, but I think he genuinely does love her, and I hope it works out.

I think part of his appeal to me was that he was more fucked up than I was, and I wanted to "help." The first time I cried in front of him, he told me, "I liked you better when you didn't have feelings." I should have ended things right there, but I was romantic and 20 years old.

The first time I cried in front of him, he told me, "I liked you better when you didn't have feelings."

Whoa. Ok, I'm not THAT much of a piece of work.

what's fucked up is i think he sounds awesome in that story

I can be a cold-ass motherfucker, but that's extremely mean-spirited.

I mean, if your crying girlfriend doesn't soften you up just a bit, you may be hopeless.

At the time, I liked me more when I didn't have feelings. Also, girls crying was kinda a weird turn-on for him.

when ppl cry for relationship-related reasons, I just get really suspicious and don't really believe them entirely

I don't know how your username sounds, when I look at it, it's all

SA http://img154.imageshack.us/img154/2371/rraaaarrltrans.png

The crying wasn't related to the relationship. Someone had written something mean about me in a campus publication. At the time, I wrote for another campus publication that regularly made fun of other students. So, I felt like I couldn't actually complain about the treatment. It still made me upset, though.

when ppl cry for relationship-related reasons, I just get really suspicious and don't really believe them entirely

That's pretty psycho. Yeah, Rorschach seems about right.

there are people that cry as a means of manipulation, but most of the time, they're genuinely upset.

I dunno, when it comes to relationship i've been with guys that were all about talking about their feelings, which generally gets me v. eyeroll unless you have some real current issues anyway, but never really gave any evidence of having feelings in any other way, and despite their words were really calculating, and I always feel like I'm the opposite, i'm sincere about stuff I just don't want to have to talk about it, you know, ever.

my most drama filled relationship was basically a lot of going through the motions on both ends i think

i'm sincere about stuff I just don't want to have to talk about it, you know, ever.

Talking about it is a skill I have acquired over time, to be sure. Ok, I kinda relate to that.

I think the thing for him, was that the crying was simultaneously affecting and he was also suspicious of it. He was definitely a product of boarding schools -- where it seems like kids perfect bullying, manipulation, and fucked up behavior towards one another a lot more than at schools where they go home to their families every day.

xp Surely I still conceal more feelings than I reveal. But there are practical reasons for that. I'm given to having intense feelings about anything and everything, and that's no way to go through your day.

yeah boarding school will fuck you up

I just try to remind myself, when I feel really intensely about something, that we're all going to die. It helps.

the school I went to still had boarders when I started going there an they were all total psychopaths, whenever they got into fights it was vicious too

At one of the boarding schools he went to, one of his best male friends got raped by a resident assistant.

some of us boarded and turned out ok

Good for those people. Your point being?

perhaps i shouldn't go for comic irony in every post...

is that what that is? XD

my point is that my ex had some seriously fucked up shit happen to him, that I generally forgave him a bit of psycho-ness.

I could never demand forgiveness of my psycho-ness, but lord knows I appreciate it.

ur squeeze isn't your therapist impo

I was also emotionally fucked up and 20 years old so I found his psycho-ness attractive.

xpost Your therapist won't forgive you, either. Not their job.

what if you're dating your therapist?

kinda liked this thread more when it was Sarahel knowing awesome music stuff and being quick on the uptake

I'll quit posting about my ex-boyfriend's fucked up youth. I've probably forgotten half of the details at this point.

I'll stop posting altogether. Friday night.

people to see, drinking to do ...

okay, here's a question:

not wanting to get into too much detail, but -

I was recently contacted by a reporter for the local paper who wants to write an article about a business I and my partner operate. The main focus of the article is one aspect of our business, that my partner manages. Motivated partly by jealousy, as well as a desire for the article to present a better picture, I mentioned another aspect of the business - the part I manage. The reporter was not aware of this aspect of our business. This aspect is not properly licensed, and we received attention from the City government about it, and we are officially "not doing that anymore." There has been a bit of criticism from the arts community of the City government for cracking down on these activities. The paper that this reporter writes for is one that City government officials actually read, as opposed to alternative weeklies, which list these activities in their paper.

I'm trying to figure out the best way of handling this. Do I play it safe? Do I tell the truth and try and make it a political issue?

not a pot club in anticipation of one obvious question.

It took a while, but I've figured it all out.

what I should do, or what my real name is?