I was raised on LOTR and Tolkien, and even so, found the final sequences of the last movie are amongst the most toe-curlingly awful things I've ever witnessed in a cinema.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:18 (fourteen years ago) link
But...but...
;_;
― VegemiteGrrrl, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:19 (fourteen years ago) link
Pure Hobbit porn, grrl. And they cut Sir Chris for that shit.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:20 (fourteen years ago) link
I thought Wizard of Oz was ass from the moment it switched to technicolor/Apollo 13 is for babies and I hated it/Star Wars is the worst thing to ever happen to modern movie making/Wall*E was a pussy/Monty Python's Holy Grail is revisionist limey claptrap
[goes home to shower in antiseptic]
― VegemiteGrrrl, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:23 (fourteen years ago) link
Now I get what's wrong with Velvet Goldmine, not enough axe-wielding goblins.
― Oppositional Soup (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:24 (fourteen years ago) link
The "Lord of Chaos" black metal movie will deliver Velvet Goblin with axe-wielding goblins.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:27 (fourteen years ago) link
Sorry Velvet Goldmine with axe-wielding goblins. Not a half-bad title, though.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:28 (fourteen years ago) link
With hobbit porn?
― VegemiteGrrrl, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:28 (fourteen years ago) link
The Fifth Element's script was so clearly written by dude at age 15
its like an ideal version of what a 15 yr old would come up with
― ogmor, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:29 (fourteen years ago) link
Velvet Goldmine was cute actor eyecandy with a solid soundtrack
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:29 (fourteen years ago) link
Velvet Goblin needs to be a band, probably. I keep forgetting Lords of Chaos is coming. Hope there's a 3D verzh.
― Oppositional Soup (Noodle Vague), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:29 (fourteen years ago) link
Upon re-seeing it, I liked it better.
― l'homme moderne: il forniquait et lisait des journaux (Michael White), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:30 (fourteen years ago) link
It made more sense after finding out about the problems with rights to Bowie songs.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:32 (fourteen years ago) link
Velvet Goldmine promised cute actor eyecandy, which was then uglified even by glam standards (impressive) and put in a shameful, pointless series of gaudy tableaux on par with Bogus in the wtf department.
― existential eggs (Abbott), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:34 (fourteen years ago) link
Bogus is my most hated film fwiw.
the gaudy tableaux were kinda the point of the movie though.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:35 (fourteen years ago) link
did i just see a picture of mr snuffeluffergus?
― Great Scott! It's Molecular Man. (Ste), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:35 (fourteen years ago) link
It did have a good soundtrack I'll admit but it's fucking Roxy Music, can't really go wrong there even if it was Wing singing it.
― existential eggs (Abbott), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:35 (fourteen years ago) link
Didn't think Velvet Goldmine was a very good movie, but I'm kind of glad it exists -- same with I'm Not There. I like that Haynes is trying to make interesting, serious movies about rock stardom, but he hasn't quite nailed it yet. It's a tough topic to do well.
― tylerw, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:36 (fourteen years ago) link
which was then uglified even by glam standards (impressive)
The 70's weren't exactly the prettiest decade...
― l'homme moderne: il forniquait et lisait des journaux (Michael White), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:36 (fourteen years ago) link
Why are we talking about a minority-interest art-house release?
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:37 (fourteen years ago) link
xxp - Both were problematic, agreed.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:38 (fourteen years ago) link
That's what I'm saying: glam was fugly but that is some next-level fug on display in that film
― existential eggs (Abbott), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:38 (fourteen years ago) link
Christian Bale in drag isn't exactly him at his best ...
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:39 (fourteen years ago) link
and the fug you see is men that you know in any other circumstance wld be bonerland
― existential eggs (Abbott), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:39 (fourteen years ago) link
I was at the UK premiere of Velvet Goldmine, and everybody hated it. This is not a challop.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:41 (fourteen years ago) link
lol bonerland
I went into that movie sure that it would be everything I'd ever wanted in a bowie-inspired romp...and I hated every breathing moment of it. maybe because the real thing looked better in books and blurry videos and hearsay than any 'imagining'.
― VegemiteGrrrl, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:41 (fourteen years ago) link
I don't think it was all fug, though there definitely was some.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:42 (fourteen years ago) link
Velvet Goldmine is wonderful and I hate you all. The end.
― the taint of Macca is strong (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:45 (fourteen years ago) link
i didn't like jeepers creepers or jeepers creepers 2 but then i found out the director was a pedophile and i signed a petition for him
― omar little, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:45 (fourteen years ago) link
I think my biggest initial problem was the faux bowie songs
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:47 (fourteen years ago) link
I think Bale's shy Brummie shtick was kind of cute and MacGregor was kind of hilarious and Rhys-What's-his-name was an excellent peacock.
― l'homme moderne: il forniquait et lisait des journaux (Michael White), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:49 (fourteen years ago) link
MacGregor had the least fugly costumes.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:50 (fourteen years ago) link
this isn't a challop at all, but John Carpenter's Vampires was so horrible I wanted to call him up and yell at him. it also informs my hatred of James Woods (which on its own may be a challop)
― VegemiteGrrrl, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:50 (fourteen years ago) link
^^^ooh that movie was terrible.
― the taint of Macca is strong (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:51 (fourteen years ago) link
I saw Jeepers Creepers II alone in a multiplex where they'd forgotten to turn the house lights off, with an audience of baying teenagers. Even considering that, it was what medics refer to as a brutal insult to the brain. I have no technical experience, but I am confident I could conceive, write and direct a better John Carpenter rip-off in six weeks, with what the catering budget must have cost.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:52 (fourteen years ago) link
just remembered Amelie (which I'm not dignifying with the appropriate accent)
― should probably be practising shorthand (country matters), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:52 (fourteen years ago) link
^^ ha, that and Juno are two I will not watch because I know I will dislike them.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:53 (fourteen years ago) link
Ha ha. I am such a sucker for Amelie but then I used to live around there for awhile.
― l'homme moderne: il forniquait et lisait des journaux (Michael White), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:53 (fourteen years ago) link
really loved Velvet Goldmine. It's kind of a mess and is not historically accurate but is very entertaining to watch. The editing is incredible...I love the way every scene starts out as one thing and ends up as another. And the music was great.
― Dan S, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:53 (fourteen years ago) link
omg ameliei saw vampires just drunk enough that i didn't feel like walking out
― alex b. skeaton (tremendoid), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:54 (fourteen years ago) link
I think its so weird that people expected Velvet Goldmine to be historically accurate. it lays its cards out on the table pretty early that its a FAIRY TALE
― the taint of Macca is strong (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:56 (fourteen years ago) link
Velvet Goldmine historically accurate? The point is that it's about the rumors and not the reality. We all believed this stuff in the 70's.
― Soukesian, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:56 (fourteen years ago) link
^^^yep
^^yes. but I remember all of the criticism it got at the time for not portraying the era accurately, which I agree is ridiculous.
there seems to be some revisionist thinking about Forrest Gump. How did it end up at 607 on the 1000-top films list? It was bad the first time and I can't imagine it's going to get any better in retrospect.
― Dan S, Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:57 (fourteen years ago) link
I think my problems with historical accuracy had to do with the chronology of various periods and recording history.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:58 (fourteen years ago) link
you know a movie's great when an actor cuts off his legs just to be in it. that gary sinise guy is amazing! such dedication.
x-post
― the taint of Macca is strong (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:58 (fourteen years ago) link
i didn't even know what velvet goldmine was supposed to be referencing at the time, it was pretty entertaining on its merits.
― alex b. skeaton (tremendoid), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 22:59 (fourteen years ago) link
its not a biopic. its a coming-out movie disguised as a musical fable.
― the taint of Macca is strong (Shakey Mo Collier), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 23:00 (fourteen years ago) link
yeah, it's more entertaining when you're not arguing about whether so-and-so is supposed to be representing Lou Reed, Bowie, Iggy, etc. at a given point in the movie.
― I ♠ my display name (sarahel), Tuesday, 29 September 2009 23:01 (fourteen years ago) link