Star Wars Anthology shit talk (Rogue One, Young Solo, TBD)

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We have less than a year to figure out everything that happens in Rogue One, folks. To reiterate:

Felicity Jones
Mads Mikkelsen
Ben Mendelsohn
Alan Tudyk
Donnie Yen
Forest Whitaker
Diego Luna

Directed by the Monsters + Godzilla guy.

I'm piling the Lord & Miller Young Solo film in here too because no kidding, Rogue One is only eleven months away. That's crazy! As stated elsewhere I predict Franco the Younger gets the part.

service desk hardman (El Tomboto), Friday, 22 January 2016 02:12 (two years ago) Permalink

I have been all about Ben Mendelsohn in pretty much everything he's ever been in, I see no reason to stop now

Monsters/Godzilla director has cornered visually-stunning-yet-disappointing like no other though, so I have ~concerns~

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Friday, 22 January 2016 02:17 (two years ago) Permalink

The screenplay looks to be a terrible hodgepodge. Story by an ILM technician, first draft by the guy behind Book of Eli and After Earth, second draft by the guy behind About A Boy and The Golden Compass. Then Christopher McQuarrie, who writes Tom Cruise movies, was brought in at the last minute to rewrite all of it. Yikes, people. Also, score by Not John Williams (Alexandre Desplat, whom I only know because of Wes Anderson movies).

Apparently they filmed in the Maldives (!?!) and Mads Mikkelsen is playing Felicity Jones' dad, who is also the Death Star's Oppenheimer.

Now, is Alan Tudyk going to be playing some sadistic lickspittle of an Imperial officer, or a cantina buffoon with a silly accent?

service desk hardman (El Tomboto), Friday, 22 January 2016 05:23 (two years ago) Permalink

Rumors of Vader being cast for this as well with J E Jones returning to add the voice.

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Friday, 22 January 2016 13:05 (two years ago) Permalink

Every attempt I've made to explain this movie's existence to non-hardcore fans has been a disaster. "What do you mean it has nothing to do with the last Star Wars? And nothing to do with the originals either? That's stupid. Why would they do that?"

Meat Sheet (Old Lunch), Friday, 22 January 2016 13:12 (two years ago) Permalink

And I mean that literally. Literally every single person I've talked to about this who doesn't identify as a Star Wars fan is confused.

Meat Sheet (Old Lunch), Friday, 22 January 2016 13:14 (two years ago) Permalink

The common link in all your failed conversations...

Andrew Farrell, Friday, 22 January 2016 13:23 (two years ago) Permalink

TBH, I'm a bit confused too why this is set in the timeline of the original trilogy and not somewhere between RotJ and TFA...? What's the point of going over things on which we already know how they happened, instead of fleshing out some of the unknown events in the 30 year gap between episodes VI and VII?

Tuomas, Friday, 22 January 2016 13:37 (two years ago) Permalink

We don't know HOW they happened though, just broadly what happened. I don't care when they set it really, as long as they come up with an interesting story and some cool new characters. But that's the hard bit.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Friday, 22 January 2016 13:45 (two years ago) Permalink

non-hardcore fans OTM

Christopher McQuarrie did write a Tom Cruise movie that had a very good first 40 minutes (Edge of Tomorrow) and, a long time ago in a Hollywood far far away, the overcelebrated but cute The Usual Suspects. What the hell is a Rogue One?

we can be heroes just for about 3.6 seconds (Dr Morbius), Friday, 22 January 2016 15:25 (two years ago) Permalink

It's a one that has gone rogue

latebloomer, Friday, 22 January 2016 16:46 (two years ago) Permalink

you mean a 7

service desk hardman (El Tomboto), Friday, 22 January 2016 16:49 (two years ago) Permalink

A one with an combover

latebloomer, Friday, 22 January 2016 16:51 (two years ago) Permalink

Man-bun One

service desk hardman (El Tomboto), Friday, 22 January 2016 16:55 (two years ago) Permalink

I did like that promo cast pic they put out.

http://cdn.idigitaltimes.com/sites/idigitaltimes.com/files/2016/01/06/star-wars-rogue-one.jpg

Where my reactions were:

1. Whoa, this looks different. This looks cool. Okay, I can dig this.

2. Alright, Donnie Yen in a SW flick. Let's do this.

3. Man, Felicity Jones is...very, very attractive.

Really not looking forward to the two months of "they don't look like bothans!"/"they're not bothans, idiot; that was the 2nd one" exchanges tho.

Darkest Cosmologist junk (kingfish), Friday, 22 January 2016 16:57 (two years ago) Permalink

I wonder how much Rogue One was either pitched or constructed years ago as the studio(s) hedging their bets against a new SW flick bombing out? "Ok, folks might not dig the new chapter, so let's play it extra-safe and set it back in OT times"

Darkest Cosmologist junk (kingfish), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:00 (two years ago) Permalink

what's with that gaudy red plate that guy is wearing? clashing so sharply with the nice dull palette of brown and grey they have going on. tone it down, buddy!

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:17 (two years ago) Permalink

is this Star Wars or a Lisa Frank lunchbox?

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:17 (two years ago) Permalink

looks like mandalorian armor

﷽ (diamonddave85), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:18 (two years ago) Permalink

the excitement coming from that picture is just too overwhelming

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:20 (two years ago) Permalink

this is gonna be GREAT so stoked

Οὖτις, Friday, 22 January 2016 17:23 (two years ago) Permalink

haha, sorry, i'll stop

Karl Malone, Friday, 22 January 2016 17:24 (two years ago) Permalink

I'd like to think the movie will just be that photograph Clutch Cargo-ed for two hours.

Meat Sheet (Old Lunch), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:25 (two years ago) Permalink

they should really carry this idea through to other franchises. imagine a Harry Potter without magic and without Harry Potter or any of his friends. GOLD!

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:30 (two years ago) Permalink

is that a promo still for the new USA series Stargate: Alderaan?

nomar, Friday, 22 January 2016 17:30 (two years ago) Permalink

xpost I don't know if you're being ironical but there's a Harry Potterless Harry Potter movie coming out later this year.

Meat Sheet (Old Lunch), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:32 (two years ago) Permalink

Star Wars: Redecorating the Kitchen in a Subleased Ranch House in Newport, CT

Karl Malone, Friday, 22 January 2016 17:34 (two years ago) Permalink

xpost i was not being ironic, lol i must have forgot that is actually happening

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:36 (two years ago) Permalink

lol what is this Harry Potterless movie, Dudley Goes to Camp?

Οὖτις, Friday, 22 January 2016 17:37 (two years ago) Permalink

Star Wars: Weekend Shift Workers Pausing To Watch the Chiefs Lose Thanks To Andy Reid's Clock Management

nomar, Friday, 22 January 2016 17:37 (two years ago) Permalink

cast photo looks like another sw w women/minority characters driving the action, so that's a point in its favor already

jason waterfalls (gbx), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:41 (two years ago) Permalink

lol what is this Harry Potterless movie, Dudley Goes to Camp?

― Οὖτις, Friday, January 22, 2016 11:37 AM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Eddie Redmayne in magical early-20th Century NYC!

Meat Sheet (Old Lunch), Friday, 22 January 2016 17:43 (two years ago) Permalink

a shed full of set photos and such for Rogue One

http://imgur.com/a/N75pb

Donnie Yen apparently tweeted some new helmets, get excited

service desk hardman (El Tomboto), Thursday, 28 January 2016 12:58 (two years ago) Permalink

four weeks pass...

http://io9.gizmodo.com/why-rogue-one-is-as-important-to-star-wars-as-episode-v-1761067899

(maybe onus is a better word)

Sith Dog (El Tomboto), Thursday, 25 February 2016 15:20 (two years ago) Permalink

Presumably, this will also be the first Star Wars movie not to include a Jedi (or possibly even anyone with Force sensitivity). Perhaps most importantly, it’s going to be the first Star Wars film without a Skywalker at its center.

I guess the writer hasn't seen the two Ewok movies?

Tuomas, Thursday, 25 February 2016 15:57 (two years ago) Permalink

rob fuckin' bricken

980 words to say 'disney will make more movies like this if this one makes money'

Butt here is always time for the John Mayer Trio or Sting. (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 25 February 2016 15:59 (two years ago) Permalink

I have a piece in the pipeline offering the counterpoint that if the movie underperforms it may affect Disney's willingness to take similar chances in the future. It's a lid blower.

Lisa Welchel's Madcap Macrame Adventure for Windows 2000 (Old Lunch), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:03 (two years ago) Permalink

Rogue One has the opportunity (maybe onus is a better word) to realize this fundamental quality of the Star Wars universe on screen—to attempt to see if the depth that has always seemed a part of the franchise is in fact real, or merely an illusion.

fyi: nothing about star wars is real

also this is a horribly formed 'sentence'

The answer depends entirely on the fate of this first stand-alone film, and thus it will shape the future of the Star Wars movies far more than the Force itself. Are the pilots of Rogue One up for this integral mission? I’m sure they’re standing by.

srs q: is english rob bricken's first language

Butt here is always time for the John Mayer Trio or Sting. (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:06 (two years ago) Permalink

his entire premise is flawed bc The Phantom Menace proved you could make an absolute crap Star Wars and people will still want more

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:09 (two years ago) Permalink

also the other two prequels

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:09 (two years ago) Permalink

Rogue One: Integral Mission, winter 2018.

Lisa Welchel's Madcap Macrame Adventure for Windows 2000 (Old Lunch), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:10 (two years ago) Permalink

yeah but will people see an absolute crap star wars that doesn't have a skywalker in it

people love skywalkers dude

Butt here is always time for the John Mayer Trio or Sting. (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:13 (two years ago) Permalink

you're right people unanimously think Anakin is the best part of the prequel trilogy

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:14 (two years ago) Permalink

People were very into the character of Anakin but iirc the unanimous praise was actually directed towards the actors who portrayed him.

Lisa Welchel's Madcap Macrame Adventure for Windows 2000 (Old Lunch), Thursday, 25 February 2016 16:54 (two years ago) Permalink

Someone saw Rogue One footage at a Disney shereholder meeting:

Most of it was very quick. A shot of the black stormtrooper, possibly called Death Troopers as previously reported, another pic of that same style of helmet and armor but all chrome, reminiscent of Captain Phasma from The Force Awakens, an image showed two AT-ATs that had a slightly different look with the door panel on the side of the body painted a lighter beige color. And a couple cast photos were shown, one of Felicity & Diego Luna and another of Donnie Yen. The clip featured Felicity’s character on what looked like the inside of a ship or shuttle with her arm up holding on and the hatch/ramp open behind her. I wish I could remember what she said as part of the sizzle but it went by too fast. The new stormtroopers looked great. …

It all looked great, had a classic Star Wars/A New Hope look & feel. Bob Iger said that they didn’t have footage but that it & Episode VIII had been filming as previously stated. I’m definitely more excited for the film since it will be set close to the classic trilogy time & like I said it definitely had a similar look/feel.

painfully alive in a drugged and dying culture (DavidM), Saturday, 5 March 2016 14:34 (two years ago) Permalink

one month passes...

a burning moisture vaporator? jesus fuck.

how's life, Thursday, 7 April 2016 01:20 (two years ago) Permalink

You a fan of moisture vaporators?

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Thursday, 7 April 2016 03:07 (two years ago) Permalink

Like, the source obviously ain't Donald Glover, Woody Harrelson or herself from Game of Thrones, and it's not the dude playing Chewbacca if he wants to keep playing Chewbacca, so WGAF?

Millennial Whoop, wanna fight about it? (Phil D.), Monday, 26 March 2018 19:06 (three weeks ago) Permalink

I hope it isn't the guy playing Jaxxon. Been looking forward to him appearing in his own spinoff.

mh, Monday, 26 March 2018 19:07 (three weeks ago) Permalink

directors being sacked when the film is mostly done is inauspicious to say the least. these movies are so made by committee that we may not be able to tell mind you

Louis Jägermeister (jim in vancouver), Monday, 26 March 2018 19:09 (three weeks ago) Permalink

"tlj didn't make as much money as expected" it's the ninth highest grossing movie of all time! sheesh

reggae mike love (polyphonic), Monday, 26 March 2018 19:14 (three weeks ago) Permalink

least interesting line of the gossip imo

mh, Monday, 26 March 2018 19:45 (three weeks ago) Permalink

yeah, but it was certainly the dumbest

Number None, Monday, 26 March 2018 19:46 (three weeks ago) Permalink

I understand that current technology makes it easier than ever to do a bunch of takes and play around in editing, but it's reminiscent of a few conversations I've seen online and had myself lately about directors who have done that historically. You could chalk it up to experimentation or Lord and Miller having less experience, but in the past there's been praise for directors (*cough* Kubrick) who pounded the performance they wanted out of the actors.

I guess my take would be that if you have to abuse your actors or work them until they're broken, then maybe you should hone your ability to direct humans and learn to communicate what you want them to do. To paraphrase that anecdotal Olivier quote: Have you considered directing?

mh, Monday, 26 March 2018 19:52 (three weeks ago) Permalink

I like more Lord & Miller films from the last nine years than Ron Howard films from the last 33 years, I don't think inexperience is an issue

just noticed tears shaped like florida. (sic), Monday, 26 March 2018 20:21 (three weeks ago) Permalink

fair

mh, Monday, 26 March 2018 20:22 (three weeks ago) Permalink

i suspect it's a bit of both - there was genuine disagreement on the tone, and also their methods for making 21 Jump Street did not smoothly integrate into a Star Wars picture

Nhex, Monday, 26 March 2018 20:48 (three weeks ago) Permalink

like you can't do 30 takes on a Star Wars movie, every minute is expensive

Nhex, Monday, 26 March 2018 20:48 (three weeks ago) Permalink

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R66FvPTj2Yw

unless you are Irvin Kershner and Harrison Ford

Hazy Maze Cave (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 26 March 2018 20:52 (three weeks ago) Permalink

ha point taken

Nhex, Monday, 26 March 2018 20:58 (three weeks ago) Permalink

lol @ "I love you" / "I love you too"

change display name (Jordan), Monday, 26 March 2018 21:05 (three weeks ago) Permalink

The Last Jedi didn't super slightly disappoint box office wise because of the film, i think it was because the marketing was pretty uninspired. for one, i recognize they wanted to differentiate between TFA and the new one, but considering it was 75% space battles it was weird how heavily they leaned on the salt flats battle in the posters and early ads.

omar little, Monday, 26 March 2018 21:09 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Easy -- hell of a visual.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 26 March 2018 21:29 (three weeks ago) Permalink

it occurred to me today how much DEATH and DYING of major characters there is in star wars. empire, which is supposed to be the "dark" and grown up one, is the only one where nobody important dies! (i think?) anyway can we please just have a fun one with nobody dying? thx

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Monday, 26 March 2018 21:41 (three weeks ago) Permalink

it's not called STAR FUNS, come on

Scam jam, thank you ma’am (Sparkle Motion), Monday, 26 March 2018 21:45 (three weeks ago) Permalink

How dare you? Luke's tauntaun was very important! Plus, nearly all the most experienced imperial starship admirals bit it too. You think those ships can just be run by a skeleton crew?

xp

Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Monday, 26 March 2018 21:47 (three weeks ago) Permalink

our good friend Righty, Luke's hand

mh, Monday, 26 March 2018 21:56 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Ice Cave Monster RIP

Dude just wanted a snack

Acid Hose (Capitaine Jay Vee), Monday, 26 March 2018 22:31 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Luke's good friend Righty, for that matter.

Andrew Farrell, Monday, 26 March 2018 22:34 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Who will weep for the noble imperial probe droid that Han and Chewie so callously destroyed?

Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Monday, 26 March 2018 22:36 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Trash compactor monster: dead or alive?

Scam jam, thank you ma’am (Sparkle Motion), Monday, 26 March 2018 22:44 (three weeks ago) Permalink

wars impact people on levels beyond dying/not dying. there is mutilation (Luke's hand cut off), there is torture (Han being tortured offscreen), the way we witness people expressing concern for others , emoting pain at the thought of the suffering of others. Empire is full of this stuff. Rogue One is probably the closest they got to that. nobody suffers, cares or mourns in TLJ, deaths are there for character motivation & plot devices (Rose at the beginning and at the end). death is glorious and individual lives are secondary to the abstracted eternal war.

Hazy Maze Cave (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 00:00 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Lobot's head thing looked pretty uncomfortable.

to eat a little "snack", to have an snack (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 00:32 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Trash compactor monster: dead or alive?

Colour me impressed if it made it through the reactor explosion which destroyed the station.

startled macropod (MatthewK), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 00:53 (three weeks ago) Permalink

nobody suffers, cares or mourns in TLJ

You didn't watch the film, did you.

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 01:29 (three weeks ago) Permalink

I’ll admit that detail may have slipped past me

xpost

Scam jam, thank you ma’am (Sparkle Motion), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 02:17 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Anyway, FWIW

Maybe don’t believe everything you read

— Chris Miller (@chrizmillr) March 27, 2018

Ned Raggett, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 04:16 (three weeks ago) Permalink

You get a parking violation and a maggot on your sleeve?

how's life, Tuesday, 27 March 2018 08:09 (three weeks ago) Permalink

“[Lord and Miller] used whole sets. But Ron is just using parts from those sets. I guess they’re not shooting wide angle. Maybe to save money.”

chairs + green screen what could go wrong

adam the (abanana), Tuesday, 27 March 2018 22:12 (three weeks ago) Permalink

oof

what’s gareth reynolds up to nowadays anyway?

star wars ep viii: the bay of porgs (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 5 April 2018 20:21 (two weeks ago) Permalink

stand-up comedy and a patreon-supported podcast

just noticed tears shaped like florida. (sic), Thursday, 5 April 2018 23:18 (two weeks ago) Permalink

hee

Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 5 April 2018 23:48 (two weeks ago) Permalink

dammit i knew that looked wrong but i posted anyway

star wars ep viii: the bay of porgs (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 6 April 2018 06:46 (two weeks ago) Permalink

Okay, new trailer

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jPEYpryMp2s

Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2018 00:59 (one week ago) Permalink

Looks dope

Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Monday, 9 April 2018 01:13 (one week ago) Permalink

MALLA??????!?!?!!?!? pic.twitter.com/XvVEI9kGDQ

— lindsey romain (@lindseyromain) April 9, 2018

if SOLO canonizes the holiday special i will take back all of those mean things i said.

— lindsey romain (@lindseyromain) April 9, 2018

Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2018 01:22 (one week ago) Permalink

Impossible, it's already canon

Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Monday, 9 April 2018 01:23 (one week ago) Permalink

In that case roll on the Bea Arthur-in-spirit led live action TV series at the cantina.

Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2018 01:34 (one week ago) Permalink

Would def watch. I would like it even better if they completely dispatched with any plot and made it an ongoing Star Wars variety show.

Mario Meatwagon (Moodles), Monday, 9 April 2018 01:37 (one week ago) Permalink

This looks dumb as sand and I am here for it

YouTube_-_funy_cats.flv (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Monday, 9 April 2018 01:44 (one week ago) Permalink

Also lol @ “I’ve got a good feeling about this”

YouTube_-_funy_cats.flv (Jimmy The Mod Awaits The Return Of His Beloved), Monday, 9 April 2018 01:44 (one week ago) Permalink

they're really not keen on showing much of Ehrenreich's performance are they?

Number None, Monday, 9 April 2018 06:30 (one week ago) Permalink

It would seem unfair in that we’d all just be watching it to see if he nailed a Harrison Ford impression and then be all “nah, thanks, bye”. Presumably if he does a good job you’d want to see the whole thing to allow his take to settle in and grow on you.

startled macropod (MatthewK), Monday, 9 April 2018 07:12 (one week ago) Permalink

Scene by scene breakdown if desired

https://io9.gizmodo.com/all-the-hints-and-details-we-uncovered-in-the-new-solo-1825092510

Ned Raggett, Monday, 9 April 2018 16:38 (one week ago) Permalink

God trailer imo. I don't think the Disney machine is going to allow this to be less than very entertaining, but it may be blander than desired.

chap, Monday, 9 April 2018 16:41 (one week ago) Permalink


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