Star Wars Anthology shit talk (Rogue One, Young Solo, TBD)

I am NOT ENTHUSED

https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2017/08/star-wars-obi-wan-kenobi-stand-alone

Either way, there’s lots of tantalizing potential—as long as Lucasfilm finds a way to negotiate the knowledge gap between fans who have tuned in to the animated Star Wars Rebels series, which takes place in the years between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope, and those who have not.

I don't think there is anything tantalizing in Obi-Wan's biography that hasn't been well covered in Clone Wars, the movies, and Rebels. I really wish they had a better idea than this.

Alternatively, this is telegraphing that OWK is somehow indeed Rey's grandad and they're going to cover how THAT happened. I don't care! Stop explaining everything!

negotiate the knowledge gap between fans who have tuned in to the animated Star Wars Rebels series, which takes place in the years between Revenge of the Sith and A New Hope, and those who have not.

yeah how are they going to market a Star Wars movie set in between two other Star Wars movies to people that haven't seen the TV show as well?

the answer of course is leave them for dead. they are horrible consumers and if they can't consume every piece of media they will never know true knowledge.

what is the thought you are trying to express?

They’re not really into adapting novels, but the Obi Wan Book which is pretty much a western is pretty good

Would be cool if the Obi Wan film was a modern day remake of El Topo.

i'm hoping for an obi-wan movie that covers what he gets up to between getting killed by vader and showing up as a force ghost in the subsequent movies

just bopping around doing ghost stuff, knocking over cups of coffee and rattling chains and shit

yeah the recent-ish obi wan comics are awesome

These are all worse than those Edinburgh Fringe jokes

http://www.vulture.com/2017/08/what-exactly-would-a-stephen-daldry-obi-wan-movie-look-like.html

It turns out that Obi Wan spent a lot of times learning a local Tatooine custom: shooting womp rats while racing around in a T-16

"knowledge gap" is some stealth consumer shaming.

We have title. It's obvious.

Hey #Twitterville we just wrapped production so here's a special message #StarWars pic.twitter.com/8QJqN5BGxr

— Ron Howard (@RealRonHoward) October 17, 2017

Trying is hard.

I would've gone for The Han Job but that's just me.

i like how he doesn't say it, so that it can be changed later in post

I'll be bitterly disappointed if Nerf Herder isn't played in the trailer.

finally saw rogue one this weekend, all of the jokes in that movie are horrible

Does K2 smacking Cassian count? That was good.

the k2 stuff was ok

At least it didn’t open with a “Can you hear me now?” Joke sequence.

otm

i am seeing the last jedi tonight so thanks i guess, but i’m talking about the movie with the bad jokes and the tonal incoherence and the unintelligible pointless space battle

sorry i should clarify further: the star wars movie with the unintelligible pointless space battle that introduces plot holes to episode iv

my friend said you can feel rogue one being rewritten as you watch it and that’s otm

adam c'mon there's a whole thread set up for you to try and rile people who enjoyed "the last jedi."

nah, im done with that. TLJ isn't good enough to pick apart. it would be like picking apart an episode of Scooby Doo. not really going to give it much thought because they clearly didn't give it any when writing it.

also im tired of Neanderthal shaming me for having the wrong opinion about Star Wars.

Vader may be tormented from having murdered his wife by choking, but he still enjoys a good choke joke.

TLJ isn't good enough to pick apart. it would be like picking apart an episode of Scooby Doo. not really going to give it much thought because they clearly didn't give it any when writing it.

who are they?

this is massive disrespect to the writers of classic icon Scooby Doo

that verizon gag had way more charm and character to it than nearly anything in rogue one, thanks no. 1 terminator genysis dan adam bruneau

genysis fan* but also, fine, genysis dan

Paul Bettany sayin' some things:

http://www.gamesradar.com/solo-a-star-wars-story-is-like-a-gangster-movie-says-new-recruit-paul-bettany/

It’s Han Solo’s story, and of course his story would be a caper. On one level it’s a gangster movie. That’s really interesting, because it’s within the canon but really different. It’s fucking Han Solo!

Suddenly, I’m an intergalactic gangster and I’m walking down some stairs and an R2 unit goes by with some champagne, and I’m like... [drops jaw] I had that feeling that I hadn’t had since I was first on a film set - I was a little boy doing the best job in the world.

They need to make a SW version of The Crown about Leia growing up on Alderaan as an Organa. I would rather see that than whatever this is going to be. You might say I have a bad feeling about it.

There Will Be Hutts

also im tired of Neanderthal shaming me for having the wrong opinion about Star Wars.

― AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Tuesday, December 19, 2017 5:58 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's ok I found you

not into any more prequels but from a story perspective a young leia movie makes way more sense than a young han one, since she barely has an arc in the original film and sort of arrives fully formed as a badass space princess running cool spy missions under diplomatic cover... versus han who needs to arrive as an ordinary rascally schmuck who isn't important or special, in order to rise above that by finding a moral center. so you could imagine a story of her becoming that badass.

gangster movie, eh?

"Now go home and get your fuckin' fusioncutter"

see, from a “we want to flesh out details” perspective lots of things make sense, but I’d much rather watch interesting stories that happen to have characters we know in them than more paint by numbers

and there are really too many known things in the movies about the Skywalker business

It would be nice to get a movie about something about normal everyday families trying to get by in the Empures reign.

I appreciated Rebels for actually showing some of that (ie "Empire Day")...and not tied into a major event (ie no LAST DAYS OF ALDERAAN shit)...

saw Rogue One on Netflix over Christmas. i had seen it before but it was a cam bootleg. it looks really amazing - imo this has been the most successful design of a SW flick post-OT because of a primary reliance on practical sets (the cgi being a little too stylistic for some, i loved digi-Tarkin and Leia). the tropical beach planet is a nice setting and thematically i like how the film dives into that ANH-style political infighting underlying the banal evil of the Empire.

Jyn is a very compelling character. that intro is devastating, her has a little girl hiding in a field while her father (designer of the Death Star) is interrogated by Empire stormtroopers and brass. she remains faithful to her father throughout the film as she begins to work with these disparate people with various motivations. the script is really good and efficient, introducing all these characters, getting you to care for them, by showing you them caring for one another.

it was even sad when the Rebel-hacked formerly-Imperial robot K-2SO died, dutifully giving directions to the Rebel fleet waiting above for getting the all-important macguffin, aiding the Rebels in his final moments of operation, as his former Imperial co workers blast him to pieces.
one of the reasons Empire was so effective was it did this a lot -- starting with Han and Chewie visibly upset and concerned for Luke's wellbeing, this empathy being tested to its limit at the end of the film.

Vader's first appearance is really awesome horror setpiece that leads up to a lame joke but in essence he is still just a cybernetic bureaucrat war criminal. Krennic appeals to him as a powerful political figure when is he screwed over by his employer, Tarkin sweeping in to fire him and take his project away from him (one of the eternally relatable banal evils of bureaucracy). Krennic and Vader are tragic figures among many: we see the Empire exploit its own time and time again, this is a large part of why they are evil. the Rebellion exploits its own but succeeds through the efforts of the individuals (who by going against orders learn the truth of the situation and gain intel justifying the final setpiece).

the island Empire R&D stronghold of the finale is an awesome concept. it sort of hints at Disneyland in Florida (an association that is likely intentional) or stunt shows but the battle scenes are all appropriately gritty while remaining PG-13. we see Jyn constantly kicking ass, taking out soldiers, scaling the impossibly tall tape archives, giving cheesy speeches. yes a lot of the dialog in this film is cardboard but that is fine and imo fitting for such a genre film. Jyn's father wrestles with his role in the creation of this device of mass murder, and this conflict informs how she fits into the Rebellion. no other SW films really seem to do this well, RO is pretty unique.

i want to note how much i loved Donnie Yen's approach to a non-Jedi Force-driven character. it was great to see the blind warrior's friendship with Jiang Wen, the two of them representing faithful/skeptical views of the Force. Forest Whitaker was a cool Rebel extremist hiding in isolation and driven mad by over-use of Interrogating Space Squid. i thought this sequence was really cool and almost made me think of Dune or something.

the ending fan service was nice, that Darth Vader scene of him tearing through the hallway full of Rebels decked out in full 70's sci fi costumes was a treat. the acting of the soldiers is great, they yell in confusion and shriek in terror, pumping up the Pulp factor in this sci fi fantasy. it is interesting to have a pretty well-made war film that is capped off with a Exploitation b-movie finale. also i noticed at the end there is a scene of him staring down at a hole in the floor of a spaceship with his cape flapping (in the space wind lol) and it makes no sense but it looks amazing, it looks like something out of a comic book.

oh yeah that’s right, i forgot this movie had like two unearned inspirational speeches

adam are you trolling y/n

reverse trolling imo

I agree with Adam even if he *is* trolling lol

noticed at the end there is a scene of him staring down at a hole in the floor of a spaceship with his cape flapping (in the space wind lol) and it makes no sense but it looks amazing, it looks like something out of a comic book

haven't seen this film but I'm keen now that I know how much it resembles The Hypo by Noah Van Sciver

adam 100% otm

adam is doing his version of a "hilarious" spoof of the talking points he imagines rubeish fanboys are intended by disney to regurgitate in youtube reviews, shame on you otmers for encouraging him in thinking this is a fiendishly witty bit of commentary on the state of things

wait are you trolling now

who's trolling who
and who's bein' true

it’s hard to tell when adam is just giving impressions or very cynically commenting because he’s on a level of irony several levels removed from anything mortals can decipher

I think he’s just giving a good everyman commentary but idk

i think adam legit likes this shitty movie

i actually liked this movie, no trolling. this movie was actually really good. this is my real opinion

tbh i usually am not trolling when i post and it feels like reverse trolling when it is constantly brought up.