are you a shirtless shitter?

I put on extra shirts before and while I shit. As many as is physically possible.

As a matter of fact I am

There aren’t official statistics on the number of people who shit shirtless.

this is a travesty

tragedy

threnody

everyone who is a shirtless shitter, sit down

so you want the shirted to shit standing up?

Preferable to doing it while standing on their heads. Think of that nice, clean shirt.

I've done this before but only when: a) it's really hot in the bathroom, b) i have gastric distress and the passing of stool is engendering a sweat, c) like first thing in the morning when i haven't gotten dressed yet

this happens infrequently (apart from c) thankfully

we don't have to take our clothes off, to have a good poop, oh no

i came here to take a shit and wear a shirt

and i'm all outta shirts

I've done this when hungover, sure

so you want the shirted to shit standing up?

You know what? Yes I do, and I'm not afraid to say it anymore

Wild shirtless bowel movements.

But my earlier comment about shirtless shitters sitting down was supposed to be a joke where they identify themselves by sitting down, rather than by standing up. I know that doesn't make any sense and isn't funny either but just want to make that clear

have you ever smelled shit on someone's shirt?

there are people that *always* take their shirts off to shit? what if you're running home? do you rip your shirt off? i've obviously been in scenarios shirtless, but it's not a prerequisite. jesus... thanks obama

i am a shitless shirter (just pooped, wearing a shirt, u jealous?)

wait, idgi... how are you supposed to wipe with your shirt on??

aren't you worried about stretching it?

....what? i really don't understand... how... how would you stretch your shirt wiping your ass?

just use your underwear to wipe, that's what it's there for

ok..... i... hold on...

depends on the season... in the summer i am usually shirtless in my apartment.

(fantasy grist for 60% of ILX)

just use your underwear to wipe, that's what it's there for

― Karl Malone, Thursday, July 27, 2017 10:26 PM (nineteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

dude, gross

boxers or briefs? boxers, there's way more fabric to wipe your shit on so they last a week or so longer before you have to wash them

bill clinton tried to tell the kids about this years ago, but everyone just laughed

lol

Karl Mslone, 46th POTUS

how does everyone wipe

my god karl

xp concentric circles

you know, i bet everyone was really grossed out and offended when people told doctors to wash their hands before delivering babies, too. change is hard

little known fact: coattails were originally invented for butt-wiping purposes, fell out of fashion with the invention of toilet paper

somehow i ended up as the escort to the homecoming queen, and i went to a hometown store with my mom to rent a suit, and somehow walked out of there with a suit with long coattails. i looked like a total douche out there on the football field but my wiping situation was not a problem at all that night

wiping while escorting was problematic I'm sure

am totally a shirtless shitter btw

Have you heard about the shirtless shitter?
Beaten by the queen of sharts every time.

You are killing me here, KM. I just laughed so hard I shit my shirt clean off.

idk about the "clean" part

I voted. I forget why.

I'm a shiftless shirker wrt shirtless shitting.

ILX what have you become

i'm amazed that ilx has never had this conversation before tbh

It's important to know the norms and customs of u society.

https://static.comicvine.com/uploads/scale_medium/11117/111170753/4154937-4426852810-dr_ma.jpg

can we please come back to:

wait, idgi... how are you supposed to wipe with your shirt on??
― flopson, Friday, July 28, 2017 1:42 AM (two days ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

aren't you worried about stretching it?

― flopson,

WTF are you on about

Wiping yr arse with the tail of yr shirt.

Obv

why else would people tuck in their shirt?

What length are tails on the shirts you wear?

"as far from my nose as possible, please"

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

guess i should put my shirt back on for this poll closing. i can only read poll results when my shirt is on

good luck with those poll sweats

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

my entire world is shittered

stso

I think shirtless shitting largely was reinforced by my brother (in his 30s at the time) laughing about how he got poop on his work shirt somehow. Nowadays I put the shirt in a different room altogether.

we need a shirt with a hole cut in the tail. we could mail them to you. Call it MeShitShirts or The Shitted Shirt, etc.

LLC

never

so next time i'm in one of those hellscape airport restrooms with dozens of stalls, i'm just going to assume that about one in every five people has taken their shirt off in there. good to know!

Insanity