RIP Boris Johnson

what the hell is a blowgob

Life imitates Spitting Image.

xpost

or was it

it's sad. he is a scene from ghostbusters now.

he’s been slimer for a long time tbf

If the British Prime Minister dies of coronavirus, war with China is inevitable.

Let’s pray he recovers. https://t.co/RB8oBZo7hJ

— Zachary Miller (@_ZacharyMiller) April 6, 2020

whos this some maga

Oh cool, this guy is from Waco.

that tweet has one like, is there a reason i have to see it

If we all work together, we can take it viral

There should be a thread for Zachary Miller tweets

I judge people who claim we’re living in 1984 rather than Brave New World harshly

— Zachary Miller (@_ZacharyMiller) April 6, 2020

send Zachary Miller thread to dead Boris!

I’m going to delete the original tweet, because the first part of it was wrong and I shouldn’t have said it.

— Zachary Miller (@_ZacharyMiller) April 8, 2020

"...doctors have described his condition as 'satisfactory'.
the funeral will be held tomorrow at blah blah blah blah"

Trump says Boris Johnson is doing "much better...at least better...he seems to be doing better, and that's good, and we send our regards to Boris and his family and his friends...He's become a very popular -- before this happened...very popular..."

— Daniel Dale (@ddale8) April 8, 2020

What a stupid person. Though I do love the hedge on "much better." Did I say "much better?" I mean, "better." That is, he *seems* to be doing better. Wait, did I say better? I meant to say "dead."

much deader

Daniel Dale must be exhausted. He seems to spend half his life reporting everything Trump says and the other half explaining how each thing is a lie/exaggeration/wrong.

Is there a 'last famous person you were not surprised to discover was actually still alive' thread we can stick Boris on?

whatever daniel dale thinks he's doing (fact checking?) is part of the problem IMO

Quoting?

He’s a New York Times article that leads with the lie, but a twitter account.

wow, my eyes just rolled so hard it broke my brain

Anyway the say it’s bad news if you do more than 3-4 days in ICU. This is day 4. If they don’t announce a discharge you can safely assume they’re lying about his condition

— Your Mum (@judeinlondon2) April 9, 2020

boris has historically tried to keep his discharges quiet tbf

No cadaver no cred. He needs dragging off that bed if he isn't dead by the end of the day.

Debatable re ICU - thereve been people walking out of there after two weeks. Though he will likely not be ready to work if/when he emerges.

I don't debate what Jude says here because I'm a Boris is faking it truther to the death now!

PM 'accessible' and 'mentally able to make decisions' from hospital https://t.co/vDLFghBZbV

— Sky News Politics (@SkyNewsPolitics) April 9, 2020

I mean that’s a change too - you have to be really sick to reach the stage where it has to be stated you’re “mentally capable” of making decisions.

What if he's discharged but then just has a heart attack on the toilet next day.

Look we're all trying to stay optimistic

Though he will likely not be ready to work if/when he emerges.

He'll just do what he's done his entire life, get someone else to do the work for him.

Big fan of Dominic Raab completely destroying the government's PR cause he's too dumb to lie properly https://t.co/03DyCLFs3F

— Loki (@Lokinash06) April 9, 2020

ya that stuck out like a sore thumb to me in the guardian liveblog too - that does not... seem good

define "not good"

I'm torn between yay he's toast! and grr! drag that malingering posh cunt out of that bed by his fucking ear.

Boris at his return to work interview pic.twitter.com/iYhgCkJUCG

— Guybrush Tweetgood (@Gordopolitz) April 9, 2020

Dig deep, friends.

Even worse than the proposed ‘whip round’ for Dominic Grieve pic.twitter.com/ZCpYVQDu7s

— Sophia (@final__girl) April 9, 2020

yes now more than ever what we must do is spend four figures on some fucking cufflinks

Starting a rival one to see if we can raise six grand for Dignitas.

irl lol

same

He dead yet?

Apparently he was engaging positively with his scrotum yesterday whilst gargling blood and shitting his kecks

Either he's much worse than is being claimed OR he thinks that Dominic Raab is too stupid and unreliable to be running the country properly in his absence and therefore the less he knows the better.

He is now out of ICU and will almost certainly live to tell the tale.

"get up yer bastard, there's nowt wrong with thee!"

RIP

UPDATE: British PM Johnson has been moved out of ICU.

"The Prime Minister has been moved this evening from intensive care back to the ward, where he will receive close monitoring during the early phase of his recovery,” Downing Street says.

— NBC News (@NBCNews) April 9, 2020