WHEN WILL BETTMAN DIE: THE NHL 2025-2026 SEASON THRED (INC PANTHERS HANGOVER 2 AND SAD ATTEMPTS TO DETHRONE THEM HOCKEY IS THE BEST)

Cory Perry

it's corey, and he's your guy now

did we ever learn why chicago straight-up waived him two years ago? such an asshole that he was infecting the kids with his assholeness?

anyway wow are teams splashing out for defensemen (who aren't really worth it)

no idea how vegas can afford mitch marner at $12m/yr but i guess alex pietrangelo doing the whole hossa/pronger basically-dead-but-on-long-term-injury-status helps

florida re-signing marchant to a six-year deal is absurd -- he's 37 -- but it's front-loaded, apparently still legal, and reasonable if you've won two Cups in a row and are looking for a third before the salary cap destroys you

see also florida bringing everyone else back

He fucked bedard’s mom iirc

i don't think i buy that, but ok

can't believe Florida keeps getting away with it.

also can't believe Boeser signed with Vancouver, really thought he was gone

Pretty happy with what the isles have done so far. Team needs to stay healthy this season though.

I know the cap is going up by a lot but the Canes and Habs signing mid-tier Dmen K'Andre Miller and Noah Dobson to expensive 8 year deals feels risky, even if they are both young.

I have a feeling there will be a lot of trades in the summer to counter the weak FA market, Ehlers aside.

kings spent an awful lot of money on brian dumoulin and cody ceci, neither of whom should be anything but a third pairing

ken holland's first order of business: let's make this team older

Speaking of old, wings signed James Van Riemsdyk for some reason

isles did good not hiring Ken Holland

so it'll be Utah Mammoth. singular. weird. could be worse i guess.

Utah Yeti would have been more fun but there are trademark issues with the brand

https://www.nytimes.com/athletic/6525427/2025/07/31/hockey-hall-of-fame-tiers-nhl-inductees/

Seeing that Tavares has 494 goals made me spit out my drink

happy 38th to sidney crosby

rip ken dryden : /

panthers down both barkov and tkachuk does not bode well for a three peat

<3 MAF <3

hockey time

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xzl2qq3Vi8

cautiously optimistic about the pens' quasi rebuild!

not wholly/necessarily about hockey, but sports leagues *need* fans who record and advance and care about the lore

https://i.imgur.com/JIDTKzA.jpeg

Anthony Mantha was so madly overhyped when the Wings drafted him

gross stuff by Vegas https://www.espn.com/nhl/story/_/id/46616724/golden-knights-bring-carter-hart-goalie-acquittal

so jack eichel is 5-10-15 in six games. that's a 205-point pace

the “nordiques” and “whalers” will play each other this week in what will probably be a future trivia question game

also the dream is still alive for the rangers to go 0-41 at home

still alive after a loss to the sharks(!)

sadly they still got an OT loser point

bless celebrini, his WAR equivalent must have gone though the roof yesterday

penguins currently atop the league at 8-2-2, 18 points

malkin (39yo) tied for third with 17 points

crosby (38yo) has eight goals, one short of the lead

never have i seen something so fated to regress

(it's still nice tho)

i'm glad you're enjoying it - i've been a little annoyed with the Quebec media (who are desperate for Crosby to join the habs asap), who have been characterizing this as the "worst possible start" for the Penguins - given that they really don't have a playoff dream, so it's in their interest to tank for McKenna. i keep thinking: "but it must be really fun to have this last gasp surprise!" sports fandom is about the adventure, not just the destination.

Schaefer has sure made this isles season more fun so far.

Elvis Merzlikins gave up two goals in the last minute or so of the game tonight and not only smashed his stick against the top of the net twice, but was seen crying on the bench afterwards. Kind of love that an early season isles-jackets game can be taken so intensely.

tbf that guy is a weirdo

the "worst possible start" for the Penguins - given that they really don't have a playoff dream

in the long term, this is probably correct? but sid/geno/letang not only saved hockey in pittsburgh, but won three cups in the process and have established a culture (fostered by Mario) that is incredible.

sid still delivers some season tickets in person each year. malkin's parents are folk heroes in pittsburgh. they are absolutely beloved, and i think that means a lot even if the team fails to make the playoffs again

So Jordan Binnington tried to steal the puck from Ovechkin's 900th goal, what a loser

Should have had a decoy puck in his pocket so he could switch them out

erik karlsson absolutely burying former coach mike sullivan, whose rangers remain winless at home (yet kickass on the road)

https://i.imgur.com/tmOkIDK.jpeg

also 15 of the 16 east teams are 'over .500' ban the loser point

being shut out at home 5 out of 7 times, especially after they have these centennial ceremonies with former players before the games is just so wild.

Still surprised they shipped Kreider and Trouba off to Anaheim, who are actually thriving right now.

TIL auston matthews is only 28

two incredible goals from mcdavid last night

oilers were still trailing after both of them, but i don't understand how he won't even smile after doing shit like that

needs to win the Stanley cup before he will smile

Grim men’s evening in edmonton

rip larry brooks

went to see the habs-dallas game live at the bell centre

....that sucked

Couldn’t have picked a worse game to see, ouch.

In a little disbelief that the isles not only came back against Vegas last night but also won it on a short handed (!) OT goal

Celebrini and Bedard both with hat tricks last night, the future looks bright

Rantanen is dirty now? Guy is asking for a broken neck next time he faces the Flames or Isles.

yikes stan bowman just got absolutely fleeced

Considering how goaltending has been optimized it’s wild how there are so few Dudes there are these days. I may just have residual stephane fiset trauma

hockey fans with knowledge of cult disco singles must be a rarity but every time I watch a game with Ville Husso in net, I end up singing his name to the tune of “Billy Who?” By Billy Frazier

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mnz1HrOBlSA

Andy K if you are reading help me out

Goodbye Quinn Hughes, jfc

lol at vegas and torts losing a second rounder bcz they wouldn't talk to the media, they're such losers

also torts himself getting fined $100k when he's on a pro-rated contract!

iirc only one game seven in the first 11 series : /

two shots, two buts

you're at home, with a chance to close things oot, in the best arena/with the best fans in the world, you score on three of your first four shots . . . and you still get blown out

that's bad hockey

Yeah Sabres really pouring it on. 6 straight goals.

Sabes

lfg

This game is fun

LFG

Here we go

Can’t say that one team deserves it more at the moment

this kind of shit is why i almost welcome my team having been irrelevant for nearly a decade

Allez

our power has been off since just after the 3rd period started. Major Oooff

appreciate how the nhl dot com visualizer shows all the habs pouring out of the bench

https://i.postimg.cc/7htMtrMV/EDGE.jpg

Was just in Buffalo over the weekend for a niece's graduation and am feeling bad for the Sabres and their fans.

they are maybe the best fans

they should be back, at least

was not expecting a shootout here

was not expecting an avs loss last night

good blog on VGK being assholes: https://defector.com/im-so-sick-of-the-golden-knights

oh you fired your cup-winning coach with two weeks left in the season and you're just too busy concentrating on the playoffs to chew gum at the same time make him available or not available to other clubs?

this is not what bark-andre fleury was about

Yeah I heard about that Cassidy thing last night and don’t get it. Is their logic that he could reveal secrets while they’re still in the ‘yoffs?

no one left would need to hire him

edmonton might well want him, and they're in the same division . . . but mostly they're just being colossal dicks

well now i guess we've got some GOALIE QUESTIONS

Gotta root for the habs

Their goalie is looking pretty stellar and i think that showed real maturity for this young team to not get rattled by that second and partial third period

was not expecting this and i don't like it

pucks to the net boys

Habs have proven you don't need to do anything so pedestrian as taking shots to win hockey games

smh

brutal

not sure whether i hate this more because vegas are dicks or because torts is a dick

not to mention the rapist goalie

dicks all around

well you can't get out-shot 3-to-1 and honestly expect to win

that game didn't feel that one-sided when I started watching in the 3rd, I wonder what the offensive zone time-disparity was. Montreal hit some posts and crossbars, and lost a goal to a bullshit offside that happened a full 30 seconds before they scored. but Montreal was at something like 13.5% shooting percentage over the playoffs, better than any team in the NHL this season. They're pretty lucky to have made it this far.

ugh

brock nelson putting up 2-1-3 in 13 games is embarrassing. you got outscored by brett kulak, dude

brent burns is 60yo and was a +9. you were -1

yeah was rooting for him as an ex islander but alas

https://www.nhl.com/news/claude-lemieux-dead-at-age-60

RIP to one of the all time pests

something must have happened

aw man, Claude Lemieux is one of those guys, maybe not one of the best players in any statistical sense (though he was very good and did win the conn smythe one year), but he just made hockey so much more interesting to watch.

RIP to one of the all time pests

a much milder statement than i was expecting from you!

seeing suggestions of suicide : /

That's the reason I nerfed my post :)

Ah shit wrong emoji srsly

oh that's so sad

Didn’t he just do the torch thing in Montreal? Or maybe I’m thinking of someone else.😔

think so

rip legend.

rip the habs :(

from This is the thread for unusual details in wikipedia articles.

They are the only father–son duo to both be punished by the NHL for biting other players.

― silverfish, Friday, May 29, 2026 10:15 AM

fuck this

all right let's have a fuckin series

nice challenge Torts