40 Year Old Fat Married Guys (Or Any Guys) Pretending To Be Horny Women

What does "fat" have to do with it?

Rick Reuschel to thread!

Cos of the Becky threads obviously, and cos it's the Interweb's oldest joke, and cos - more broadly - online 'drag' doesn't seem to me any less noble a pursuit than its offline equivalent, but there's an assumption of creepy that goes on I think. Of course there you're moving away from the 'horny' bit, for sure, and into different territories, which Kate tried to address in that thread a week or two ago...

JBR - "fat" quoting Colin M from the Becky thread.

i.e. "A 40-year-old married masturbating fat guy with a pitchshifter has just made fun of my first name. My day is complete."

Perhaps the difference is because it's hidden behind anonymity. How many supposedly horny women on the internet go "hey chill, I'm a 40 year old married man really"?

Marcello to thread!

wrong with it: its deceit, and regardless of how harmless or harmful that may actually be in one situation, it seems like a very futile exercise in deceit...maybe the old fat married guy gets a perverse kick out of it but that seems to fit the general depiction of sadness

i think online drag is much worse then 'real drag' because, while in this case you may have found it obvious that the online tv was indeed in drag, that might not be as obvious as when you see such curious creatures (ha) in the flesh...also, surely the main attraction of pretending to be of another sex is for the aesthetic appeal - gratifying for the individual and also their 'audience', they hope. i mean online drag is crap because all it really amounts to is just saying 'oh yeh, i'm a woman...i'm gonna talk about crap traits in men or something to prove it' - where's the fun in that, for us or for them?

have you heard about that book by Douglas Pledger (the illustrator best known for his work for Oysmyso and Cartel Communique) in which he documents his experiences pretending to be a horny young woman to see what kind of response he got from people (mainly 'sad old blokes' presumably) on internet chatrooms

apparently its fascinating reading and indeed a tad disturbing...i still cant help but feel a pinch of sympathy (or maybe more) for the dumb fools taken in by it though....but NO, IT NEVER HAPPENED TO ME, HONEST GUV

there's no need to cast aspersion on trannies just to call out trolling marcellists

While waiting to get my tires fixed on a road trip recently, the talk/shock show on the waiting room TV was addressing this very subject in relation to cybersex. One of those "40 year old fat married guys", who talked in a dark room with his voice disguised, said he chatted up guys online because he wanted to experience straight guys through a woman's sexuality as feasibly as possible, since a transexual operation would just not seem like a smart thing to do, given his looks and his age.

Wait, Tom, are you assuming these guys you're questioning were online to start with? Or guys that dress up as horny women on the street? you didn't specify.

I've gone into chat under a female guise a few times for a couple of different reasons:

First of all, I wanted to find out just how differently one is treated when people think you're female. There's a striking, if predictable, difference. Suddenly everyone wants to be your friend, and you can say whatever bollocks you like without fear of being ridiculed. (in most cases)

Secondly, in some instances I was seeking sexual gratification. Being bisexual and having mild cross-dressing fantasies, the thought of having sex like a girl is quite the turnon. I'd do this to get into some sort of cybersex situation, where I'd be conscious of another guy somewhere getting his rocks off over what I was typing.

Isn't it a bit rockist to assert there's something wrong about identity-play as long as it's belivable on its own terms?

donut's post reminded me that I saw a man on sauchiehall street a few weeks ago with a funny outfit. he had a beard and glasses and a bald head and a long sort of sports jacket that went down to his knees, below his knees he was wearing red fishnet stockings and high heels. OK?

i should point out that i dont condemn such behaviour, just that it bugs me a little because of the deceitful aspect. its fine if you're fulfilling your own fantasy but like a joke, practical or otherwise, there's always a 'victim' isn't there? depends how involved/serious you get with a particular person or people during the act i guess.

the desire to try and experience firsthand how it feels to be of the opposite sex to you, or at least, perceived as of the opposite sex by others can be fun...especially online as this requires no real 'work' - just an understanding of how to 'behave' more like that...this in turn opens up many questions about what kind of judegemtns and assumptions you make when talking to people online that you don't know...if you are unsure of their real name, how do you ascertain their gender if they do not offer clues, intentionally or otherwise? how much does it matter to you? is it more instinctful than you may realise?

having a "chicks name" many (or most) times online people automatically assume me to be a girl, which is interesting because i've never gotten the "everyone wants to be yr friend" vibe described above, but more that as a supposed "mouthy broad", i'm a troublemaker (i.e. ryan pitchfork's famous "what's her problem?")

Do we have some reason to assume that Becky is a 40 year old man, of whatever build, as opposed to what she claims? Other than amateur psychology of some vague sort, obv. (That isn't remotely meant to be supportive of Becky, I should emphasise! I'm just puzzled as to this reason for objecting to her, rather than what seem to me more direct, obvious and inarguable ones.)

I've never met a girl who is comfortable using the word "butsex", but you could call me sheltered.

b-b-but...sex.

who is this Becky then?

it's funny, I certainly think of myself who wastes away their life reading everything on ILX, but I'm always finding that the latest slice of ILX action has completely passed me by.

By the way, I'm not really a vicar.

Yeah, who is Becky? And where are these threads people are being mean to each other? I miss all the fun.

NB I am not condemning Becky or any of the 'online dragsters' - I think the deceit thing is a problem but only once a line is crossed, that line IMO being the establishment of some kind of one-on-one emotional relationship in which 'your gender' is a factor. Definitely in any kind of 'adult chat' I think you'd have to be very naive to think ANYONE is telling the truth - the problem with it isn't the deceit, it's that the lies told are so boring.

When I've done the chatroom identity-play thing I've noticed a scale of discomfort/guilt relating to which aspects of identity I'm assuming - class and age not at all; gender a little bit; race quite a lot; beliefs a great deal (which is odd cos trolling Xtian chatrooms is pretty much Identity Play For Dummies).

I think it's fairly easy to assess in a chatroom the extent to which it's a 'community' i.e. founded on trust between users, or whether it's more of a just-passing-through truck-stop place. The latter is fair game for identity-switching, the former puts you in a more destructive position.

I think it's a bit of a shame though that the interweb has shifted from being - as originally advertised c.94 - a place where you can be anyone you want to be - to a place where your identity is policed (literally if some recent proposed legislation passes). Inevitable, but still a pity.

oh, I know who Becky is now.

Bnw - if you want to know where the real action is, check the thread where people shout for the Moderator.

I don't think that there is anything fundamentally wrong in cyber-cross-dressing for sexual pleasure, but timing, location, and style are everything. I don't think that ILE is all that great a place for it -- we're alternately too serious and too funny, and what sex talk does go on here tends either to be full confession or obvious goofing, and "Ooh, I'm a naughty little Lolita" doesn't quite fit (unless uttered by Dang Perry).

Martin: I am absolutely playing "Amateur forensic psychologist" here, and I almost always do. "Fat" was not a random insult (I am not thin) but based on the specific obsession with a 28" waist and the description of self as a "perverted little thing". "Mastubating" and "man" come from the repeated requests for graphic descriptions and pictures of the sexually desired people and activities. "Married" and "old" were just me being mean.

My new theory: if Becky is a real young girl, she has an eating disorder and found ILX by googling on "pro-ana". (That is, I think this might also be the person who posted on the "public art" thread.

"pro ANAL"...Colon.