FIST BITING RAGE!!!!!!

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH, door kicking, plastic container throwing, throat hurting rage.

Humorous but real. When was your last time? Once more for good measure, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 17:29 (twenty-three years ago)

The last time I bit into a tasty biscuit. Must... see.. about.. teeth. AAAAARGGGGHHHH

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 17:31 (twenty-three years ago)

I came in to my house and the things I had bought for dinner are all in the bin and other things have been cooked in alternate ways, I hate college, I was looking forward to getting home and having a few beers with my friends around while I cooked ALL DAY. Now I think I just have to buy all the stuff again. My parents asked a friend to come in and see if the place was ok, which it was, and as much as I appreciate that GEJAHLFCJHNWDL,KVJCPJCV;ASLDJFCLAHAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHH.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 17:35 (twenty-three years ago)

I actually did kick the door this morning. Because a stupid parcel I had to take to work was too stupid big and was making my bag stupid heavy and I was stupid late anyway. Regressing to age 7 for a few minutes felt pretty good.

― Archel (Archel), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 17:38 (twenty-three years ago)

Roommates are definitely a source of fist-biting rage. I didn't realize how nice it'd been over the past week without the one I don't like, until he stomped in at 1 in the AM.

― hstencil, Tuesday, 18 February 2003 17:38 (twenty-three years ago)

I kicked the door but then worried it would damage my pristine new shoes.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 17:42 (twenty-three years ago)

Cabbage to thread!

― Mark C (Mark C), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:01 (twenty-three years ago)

i knew this was a ronan thread before even opening it

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:04 (twenty-three years ago)

Yeah I reckon I have about 3 similarly titled ones.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:09 (twenty-three years ago)

Hello, I'm on the verge of one right now!

I can't believe I'm still in work and will be here for ages yet!

― chris (chris), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:10 (twenty-three years ago)

'fist' and 'biting' .. but no sex?

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:22 (twenty-three years ago)

that's why the rage comes in I assume.

― jel -- (jel), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:24 (twenty-three years ago)

wot a swizz

― N. (nickdastoor), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:41 (twenty-three years ago)

I so misread this!

― g.cannon (gcannon), Tuesday, 18 February 2003 18:49 (twenty-three years ago)

eight months pass...

right. fucking. now. jesus. I am about to do something v stupid.

― allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

oh, you have to share with the group ... that's not fair ...

― Dean Gulberry (deangulberry), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

"do you see, your point is being completely convoluted by levels of what the fuck."

― allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

take a deep breath first
then smite those that mess with you
with an iron fist

― Haikunym (Haikunym), Tuesday, 28 October 2003 22:34 (twenty-two years ago)

i'm suddenly feeling a whole lot better. but it is a bit too late?

― allyzay, Tuesday, 28 October 2003 22:42 (twenty-two years ago)

I dunno. Did you do the stupid thing?

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

was it spreading cream cheese on a cinnamon bagel stupid?

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 11:53 (twenty-two years ago)

actually that doesn't sound too bad now (i'm hungry)

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 11:54 (twenty-two years ago)

I can't tell you what I did but I did all of it.

― allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

"Oh no, THAT was the bad thing..."

― kate (kate), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:35 (twenty-two years ago)

All of it, or all of them?

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:41 (twenty-two years ago)

You know that was exactly the type of comment, except yours is much milder, that started the reign of horror and binder throwing and computer sabotage to begin with.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh Ally, you know I don't mean it!

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:49 (twenty-two years ago)

The thought of DAISY DONOVAN! ARGH!

― Sarah (starry), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:49 (twenty-two years ago)

You're just worried I'm going to throw the binders at you next.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I would be in a fist-biting rage except I have nothing in particular to focus my anger at. However it should be noted that the military is a complete crock of shit.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, I really hope that you end up suing them. FREE EDUCATION BABY.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Things I have gained from my workplace, part I:

1) An increased instance of migranes
2) A significantly lowered GPA
3) A slap in the face (literally)
4) The 12" dick story
5) The belief that I am basically useless white trash
6) Drinking the water has possibly caused/accelerated development of a disease
7) Lots of expensive equipment/clothes destroyed by their shitty building I live in leaking all over the place
8) Pnuemonia from being forced to work til very late when very ill (TWICE)
9) See-through clothing

Dude the fact that it took me this long to totally blow up is amazing, but the conversation yesterday was fucking BEYOND. They knew I could hear them and they were talking like that! It was disgusting.

The thing is though I mean I totally should be in trouble for my behavior and in fact I was TOLD I would be but...uh...??? Everyone is being as normal. I said this last night, I could fucking come in and Jay-Z everyone's desks here and no one would say anything to me.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:01 (twenty-two years ago)

This is quite odd, have you spoken to your boss today?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah! I guess they just came to grips with the fact that my behavior isn't comparable to, you know, SLAPPING PEOPLE IN THE FACE or that kind of thing. Assholes. I hope they all die in a firey hellpit! In METROPARK.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, you are a saint for not having torched that building and everyone in it.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:10 (twenty-two years ago)

I agree.

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Hear hear. We are not saints, though, so we can do that for you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe you should start slapping ppl in the face ally, or at least just showing ppl your now infamous pic! (you know the one)

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:18 (twenty-two years ago)

You mean the one of the DJ cat, right?

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Nope, the one of either you or Tom flipping the bird. It says so much!

(although dj cat could work!)

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:20 (twenty-two years ago)

haha I now have a focal point for my anger even though they are not responsible for any of my current misfortunes. I am going to kill all of them.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:20 (twenty-two years ago)

at least just showing ppl your now infamous pic! (you know the one)

http://bitchcakes.topcities.com/garethfap/phoneconfusion.jpg

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:21 (twenty-two years ago)

You know, maybe Gareth just WANTS a drug war.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Of course, it will bring prices down.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh and another thing:

10) About 20 CDs been stolen off my desk in the past 4 years.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

flipping the bird is so, so minor. I mean that pic is funny but it in no way communicates my desire to put lit cigarettes in people's eyeballs and force them to drink fix-a-flat.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I dunno, Tom. I kind of like the idea of, for the next two months, every time someone irritates me I show them a random picture of my friends/relatives in weird predicaments. "Haha you think I'm just here for tittage, well how you like NITSUH WITH A BEAR!!"

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:25 (twenty-two years ago)

A picture of Nitsuh with a bear would be appropriate in nearly any situation.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:26 (twenty-two years ago)

I kind of like the idea of just killing some people and getting it over with and having lots of somebody else's type O all over my clothes.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:26 (twenty-two years ago)

though I guess that kind of rage isn't the "fist-biting" variety is it?

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:27 (twenty-two years ago)

how come everyone knows what all this is about but me?

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:28 (twenty-two years ago)

"You want me to do what? Work 7 days a week with no overtime pay for three months?? HOW YOU LIKE BNW AND THE RADIOHEAD VAN, MOTHERFUCKER!!!"

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:28 (twenty-two years ago)

*sneaks away*

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:29 (twenty-two years ago)

I am clueless too, except for Ally's general work problems. But the specifics aren't really important, I guess.

― NA (Nick A.), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:29 (twenty-two years ago)

except i am now reminded about Allyzay/Uma Thurman comparisons and how they finally may be apt

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Tom, you can start with B*** if you really have to kill someone.

Guys, I think I explained my work problems up thread? See: bulleted list, especially numbers 3 and 6. The most recent bout involved a really disturbing conversation I "accidentally" overheard (read: they had, loudly, two feet from my desk) speculating about my sex life and what exactly I was good for. This caused me to lose my shit completely yesterday. I was supposed to get "spoken to" today about what I did yesterday. I have not been spoken to. YET. THEY BETTER COME STRAPPED COS I HAVE THE POWER OF THIS PHOTO OF SPENCER CHOW WITH A BEAR!!

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Alternately I also have the power of my newly pulled apart and fashioned into a weapon letter opener and my lack of caring about continuing to live, at least in a legal fashion.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:37 (twenty-two years ago)

"A small thermonuclear explosion occurred in the mid-town area today; sole survivor Allyzay reported merely that 'it was for their own good' and then rode a chickenbear into the sunset."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:40 (twenty-two years ago)

said people reviewer Ned Raggett of the orange county reporter

― charltonlido (gareth), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:55 (twenty-two years ago)

FUCK YOU!!

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry, somewhat unrelated...

GOD DAMNIT YOU FUCKING MORANS IT'S BEEN OVER AND DONE WITH FOR A LONG TIME NOW HOW DOES THIS BULLSHIT KEEP HAPPENING OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY DO YOU PUT ALL THE WEIGHT ON ME OF ALL PEOPLE!?!?!?!?!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 15:59 (twenty-two years ago)

and unrelated to that:

FUCK THE POLICE! YOU CAN'T GIVE ME A NOISE ORDINANCE CITATION AT SIX IN THE FUCKING EVENING!!!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Good luck, Ally.

Fight the power! Fight the power! Fight the power! You gotta fight the powers that be!

(nickalicious, could you please turn it down? I'm trying to work)

― Sarah MCLUsky (coco), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Charlton Lido is positively dreamy!

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Wah, I'm not a people reviewer! I'm an unsocial scientist.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Haircare Correspondent surely

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:20 (twenty-two years ago)

My side job.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:20 (twenty-two years ago)

A sideburn-less side job at that!

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Hair Don'tCare

― mark s (mark s), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Nicolars beats me to the one obvious horrible gag I'm going to make all day. That's it, back to empty threats of homicide

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe you could work in a joke about a side part.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

*rim shot* Tombot, don't make them empty, live up to your promise.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

I like the empty threats though, it's positively dreamy!

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:23 (twenty-two years ago)

dreamy indeed. why am I stuck in this shithole?

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:27 (twenty-two years ago)

not enough lube?

― stevem (blueski), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I demand an mp3 of Sarah McLusky rapping.

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:27 (twenty-two years ago)

She can't rap so she's a gay rapist.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't see what being stuck in a shithole has to do with being dreamy.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:28 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry, I'm caught up in Raunchy Young Lepers mania.

― Nicolars (Nicole), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't apologize for the glory(hole).

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Sarah has got some really good raps that she made up when she was like 10 or 12 or something. They are very Kid'n'Play-esque. Next time there's a FAP and she's drunk, get her to perform them for you.

― NA (Nick A.), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Next time there's a FAP and she's drunk and I'm in the USA... Are you going to be in NYC in April at all?

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, you're fantastic

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:54 (twenty-two years ago)

In one of them, I had shout-outs for each family member. I taught it to my sisters so they could do backups. They got my back, yo!

I came up with one this summer, you know, trying to get back in the biz, and I thought it was pretty damn good. This one had more of a lil Kim influence and was called ICEY HOTTT. But then I laid it on my mom and sisters and they just sat there in stunned silence and were like, "Um, is that a joke? Has Nick heard that?" I think I traumatized them.

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Sam, you just made me smile. Thank you.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 16:58 (twenty-two years ago)

HAHAHA Apparently though I no longer have to monitor the tampon/pad disposal habits or the toilet paper in the bathrooms here. That job has been transferred to J***** who was just upstairs carrying on about how these prima donna trustafarian bitches I work with were requesting she go buy them some Quilted Northern because they don't really prefer Charmin.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE!! Attention people of M********* P*******: neither myself nor JW care one bit about what you wipe your ass with or what you choose to do with your tampons. For the love of god stop trying to involve us in your bathroom process.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 17:08 (twenty-two years ago)

(insert potty humor here)

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 17:09 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.scottart.com/galleries/rescue_fire/images/Toilet_Mar2001.jpg

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 17:14 (twenty-two years ago)

ally tell 'em at least you have toilet paper. i think I'm going to start bringing my own roll.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 17:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Well that's my point, Sam. I mean, every other place I've worked/had meetings/attended school/done pretty much everything ever besides my own house (and even then sometimes not) has had regular Marcal/Scott plain unquilted old skool toilet paper. Who are these people that they seem to feel entitled to this? See also the constant "Why do we get Coke/Pepsi in the office when I like (insert opposite Cola here)?" debate.

Tracer Hand, at the very least, can vouch for the insanity of the fridge in this joint. And they have the nerve to bitch! It's like a supermarket. "Oh we need Equal/Sweet and Low/Splenda"/"Where is the individual serving sized cereal?"/"Why don't you order some more flavored coffee?" I've never in my life seen anything like this and they get beligerent and vicious when deprived of, you know, completely outrageous luxuries.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 17:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Argh I need to go shopping cos now I am raging at things nonwork as well. WHY IS MY LIFE RETARDED, FILM AT 11.

― oh guess, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 17:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Ally, if it makes you feel any better, I haven't mentioned fellatio once on ILX today.

― NA (Nick A.), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 18:11 (twenty-two years ago)

we seriously don't have any toilet paper. The girls bathroom next to my class will have two rolls for 7 stalls first thing in the morning but they disappear by second period. Also there is no soap or pad/tampon dispensers at all.

The nearest teacher's lounge is not a feasible walk btw classes (although we have to purchase our own soap for that br at least there is paper). So I keep kleenex in my pockets and hand sanitizer in the desk.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 18:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Tom has to not kill all of those people at Ally's work. Because I'll be in NY next week, and I want to take back at least one of those muthafuckas heads as souvenirs.

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 18:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"This is the thread where Dan prays that nothing actually happens to Ally's coworkers because half of ILX really doesn't need the police knocking down their doors on wild goose chases."

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 18:39 (twenty-two years ago)

That doesn't make me feel better at all, NA. In fact, it makes me tres triste.

Tom has to not kill anyone at my workplace for a whole lot of reasons, but no one else here is allowed to do it either because they'd just blame me or Tom anyway. The authorities, I mean.

― Allyzay, Wednesday, 29 October 2003 18:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Who's Ally?

― Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 29 October 2003 19:01 (twenty-two years ago)

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