ennui; im becoming a sullen alcoholic, swv - right here (human nature remix)

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christ its sad, all that uncertainty and weirdness of the past few months (fuck it, years) comes rushing to the forefront, like lately i dont know if its worth getting rejected to even make a try for something that actually matters to me, oh well! fuck its eternally an illogical crush anyway, i mean i havent been feeling so great about 'crushes' recently ... maybe the problem, like the BIG problem, is that i just dont have anyone to fall in love with (sob sigh!!) like ok, a while back i think i taught my sheltered obsessive self to become an almost convincing fly indie tart slut but this dumb ass petty superficial world of that seems less appealing by the day, i guess ill still take the emotional and physical closeness of it though. i feel like whats her name in husbands & wives, 'well...ive found someone i LIKE', is that all its going to be for the rest of my life?? i never thought id even have to worry about being liked more than i did towards someone, im so used to being a dorky highschooler whos opressive and stifling romantically that when i finally stop caring thats when the right peoples dont love me and the wrong peoples do, god if only i could choose who fell in love with me!! well maybe i can, and sort of have, i suppose the great irony here is that when i am in love i cant make a move but when its someone who means nothing i can totally go for it and, ok wait that actually makes perfect sense, its not ironic at all : /

trife, Sunday, 9 March 2003 07:29 (twenty-three years ago)

thank god, i have been missing you on this thing, ethan!

ron (ron), Sunday, 9 March 2003 07:38 (twenty-three years ago)

sorry thats just sort of a depressing as fuck mind dump, dont worry im doing ok just feeling a little emotional!! but in the good and bad emotions overwhelmed way, i dunno its just something maybe people think about too, like maybe thats all we get and refusal of just dumb fun sluttery isnt puritanical at all, its a way to be happier!! and the countless hours spent in my head thinking about meaningless relationships would be better spent on improving myself in a real non vanity based way or helping others or perhaps drinking too much, also i was glad to learn swv can still make me beer y teary eyed

trife, Sunday, 9 March 2003 07:42 (twenty-three years ago)

i like "rain" even though it's cheesy as hell

ron (ron), Sunday, 9 March 2003 07:47 (twenty-three years ago)

ok i think maybe in the end its just about those moments of pure adoration, like just before everything goes wrong, i have at least one of those with every person ive ever been involved with at all no matter how mismatched or whatever we were, but i had to work for those moments!! what if i just want to opt out of the game entirely!! ugh another part of me suspects im just fooling myself into another way to feign attractiveness AND not look dumb when i have no luck romantically, because if im not trying no sweat if nothing happens right!! and of course not being 'needy' will draw the sensitive ones, ha ha dear god

trife, Sunday, 9 March 2003 08:10 (twenty-three years ago)

those moments seem to involve nature a lot too, maybe its a way to be closer to god!! thats another real issue for me...

trife, Sunday, 9 March 2003 08:15 (twenty-three years ago)

emotions are boring

duane, Sunday, 9 March 2003 23:03 (twenty-three years ago)

You should go on a singles cruise

Millar (Millar), Sunday, 9 March 2003 23:10 (twenty-three years ago)

ethan did you get the f-word?

mark p (Mark P), Sunday, 9 March 2003 23:12 (twenty-three years ago)

you never could take my advice could you

jess (dubplatestyle), Monday, 10 March 2003 01:00 (twenty-three years ago)

four years pass...

Who remixed "Right Here (Human Nature)"?

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:29 (eighteen years ago)

wow EMO MUCH LOL GET A LIVEJOURNAL GEESH

The Brainwasher, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:30 (eighteen years ago)

the sadness of my soul and the anguish of things that cannot ever be fulfilled, for do they exist? is overtaking me - I'm stuck in the fucking suburbs

burt_stanton, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:30 (eighteen years ago)

Can I say I really just bumped this because it is an SWV thread?!

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:37 (eighteen years ago)

Nope

burt_stanton, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:41 (eighteen years ago)

Ok!

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:42 (eighteen years ago)

Today I downloaded the entire 1993 Billboard Top 100 and listened to it all. This song is amazing!

I am in love with 1993.

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 04:47 (eighteen years ago)

JEALOUS.

Abbott, Sunday, 24 February 2008 06:40 (eighteen years ago)

Anyone can do it!

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 06:46 (eighteen years ago)

I'm lazy about two things, and those are cleaning and downloading things. !!!

Abbott, Sunday, 24 February 2008 06:48 (eighteen years ago)

i know i'm lazy about downloading except for on my super fast comp. at home. like right now i really want to hear the Breeders leak but this comp. is just too slow and i'm too lazy to bear with it.

Surmounter, Sunday, 24 February 2008 06:54 (eighteen years ago)

ethanmo

mookieproof, Sunday, 24 February 2008 06:57 (eighteen years ago)

you know that dling is more about the speed of your connection than the computer itself, right?
xpost

tehresa, Sunday, 24 February 2008 07:00 (eighteen years ago)

yea but the speed of the comp if it's really slow, doesn't help

Surmounter, Sunday, 24 February 2008 07:01 (eighteen years ago)

Y'all realize that you don't have to actually power the download by pedaling a bike, right?

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 07:08 (eighteen years ago)

HA

roxy downloads like 5 things every half hour

Surmounter, Sunday, 24 February 2008 07:11 (eighteen years ago)

Is that supposed to be a lot!?

roxymuzak, Sunday, 24 February 2008 07:14 (eighteen years ago)

hahahaha

Surmounter, Sunday, 24 February 2008 07:16 (eighteen years ago)

emotions are boring

-- duane, Sunday, 9 March 2003 23:03

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/ea/Spinoza.jpg

Bodrick III, Sunday, 24 February 2008 14:16 (eighteen years ago)

That painting makes me want to go get some pasta...

snoball, Sunday, 24 February 2008 14:29 (eighteen years ago)

Old School Mix of this with the Wu is pretty good.

Dom Passantino, Sunday, 24 February 2008 14:34 (eighteen years ago)

It's Teddy Riley + Neptunes, correct (Human Nature remix, I mean)?

roxymuzak, Monday, 25 February 2008 03:40 (eighteen years ago)


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