Do you often have something in your grasp only to decide against taking it because of the 1 percent fear of failure?

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Was it in love? money? work?

I really need some deal closing lessons from someone. This feels such a middle class fear of failure.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:25 (twenty-two years ago)

cos I mean if you have it in your grasp, its only a 1 percent fear of failure obviously.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:28 (twenty-two years ago)

you might only think you have it in your grasp.

― DV (dirtyvicar), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:29 (twenty-two years ago)

what accounts for the other 99 percent of the reason why you didn't take it?

― amateurist (amateurist), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:29 (twenty-two years ago)

thats the crux I suppose.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:30 (twenty-two years ago)

1% fear shouldn't be enough to keep you from it. Just do it.

― Orbit (Orbit), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:31 (twenty-two years ago)

I guess it depends on how much you the value the thing, and how disappointing would the failure be. Are we talking about something specific here?

However, I don't think this could be applied to love. If it was, no human being would ever date another.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:33 (twenty-two years ago)

ah no it said "1 percent chance of failure". I guess there's a difference between a percieved and detached actual chance of failure as discerned by advice and societal wisdom and percieved chance of failure as discerned by your past, present, and your brain, not to mention possible futures you conjure up.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Ronan, being like this myself, I basically swore to myself after backing out of yet another huge success that it would never happen again. Now I'm on the cusp of another little wave of success, I'm watching myself like a hawk. Do not back out, Colin! Ride that little wave!

I think to be truly respectful of one's own decisions, Ronan, one has to appreciate there is some kind of integrity in one's past backout decisions - the chances of failure may indeed have been slim, but the success was the wrong kind of success for you. That seems at least to be a possibility. This isn't accounted in the percentage analysis that uses success and failure alone.

What I'm saying, I suppose, is that if you're on the right path for your own personality, you'll be more confident, whether or not your chances of success are high.

― colin s barrow (colin s barrow), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:38 (twenty-two years ago)

How can you ever know the actual chance of failure? Is there such a thing? Wouldn't the knowledge affect the chance, etc...?

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Sometimes though don't you have to smash a certain part of your personality in a berlin wall style in order to make yourself happier? Is this conformity?

I guess Tuomas you can never know for sure, it's not mathematical like I phrased it but there is some assessment involved, at least with me anyway. I don't really want to say what the specific situation is because I want to discuss the process more than have a what should I do thread, this isn't a thread about me really.

― Ronan (Ronan), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 21:42 (twenty-two years ago)

This applies to the job application that I should have been filling in this evening.

― Lara (Lara), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 22:12 (twenty-two years ago)

Usually if/when I decide to take a risk (whether in love or work), I'll just go for it. After all (I think) failing isn't the worst thing that can happen.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 22:41 (twenty-two years ago)

If there aren't physical/material/monetary risks involved, it's all about your self-esteem, ie. how well can you handle the embarassment that follows the possible failure (even if no one will know about it, you will, and that's enough to make you feel embarassed). I'm quite bad at handling it, so such risks always scare. I guess that's why my dating life sucks.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 15 July 2003 22:50 (twenty-two years ago)

part of it also which i didnt explain well is that sometimes there's a fear of success, ie more to lose in the long run.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 16 July 2003 07:00 (twenty-two years ago)

can u tell us what it is ronan, or is that too personal ?

since i'm curious - but then again, i always am

― Vic (Vic), Wednesday, 16 July 2003 07:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes.

― kate (kate), Wednesday, 16 July 2003 07:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Tons

― Lynskey (Lynskey), Wednesday, 16 July 2003 07:49 (twenty-two years ago)

The answer is I am this close to getting my hair cut short forever. The real answer is what it is.

― Ronan (Ronan), Wednesday, 16 July 2003 19:00 (twenty-two years ago)

fear of success more often
maybe

― Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Wednesday, 16 July 2003 19:08 (twenty-two years ago)

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