Creative ways to spend my last day at work:

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Ideas?

― Kate Silver (Kate Silver), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:10 (twenty-two years ago)

make me something practical for use around the home out of things that you can find in the office

― j0e (j0e), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:15 (twenty-two years ago)

Posting to ILXor. Duh!

― kate (kate), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Stealing office supplies.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Planting worms and viri on the server... whoops, I didn't say that!

― kate (kate), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:18 (twenty-two years ago)

licking the company donuts

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:18 (twenty-two years ago)

HULK SMASH!!!!!

― mark s (mark s), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Burning all your downloaded MP3s and porn to CD-Rs.

― kate (kate), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:21 (twenty-two years ago)

clipping your toenails into the coffee pot

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Pissing off all your soon-to-be-former workmates.

― Sarah McLUsky (coco), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Loosening the retaining screws on various items of office furniture,small amounts of sugar in the innards of the photocopier,or down the paper feed of the printers,if you really want to leave your mark,then a nice bit of haddock or a tuna sandwich in a filing cabinet is a winner everytime.The best of all,if you have the nerve and the balance,is the 'Upper-decker',where you take a dump in the toilet cistern.They will be looking for the source of the pong for weeks after you have left.....

― Eugene Speed (Eugene Speed), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Go to the pub for lunch. Remain there.

― robster (robster), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, just leave. What's the point of sitting there all day?

― NA. (Nick A.), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Task 1: Make use of a new box of sticky labels! I make up fake bands like "The Pink Slips" (new wavey-font in hot pink!) and hand them to the few co-workers who know. aka my friends.

The girl who will take over my receptionist position on Monday doesn't even know yet.

― Kate Silver (Kate Silver), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Drop massive hints about your leaving present.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:38 (twenty-two years ago)

i also think stealing office supplies on your way to a LOOOONNNNNGGG pub lunch is the way to go. and doing lots of printing. like the novel you've been writing, or every email you've ever gotten.

and can you make long-distance calls from your phone?

― colette (a2lette), Thursday, 17 July 2003 12:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Use this opportunity to go to an assload of p0rn sites and get your office on their spam lists!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 17 July 2003 14:05 (twenty-two years ago)

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNG pub lunch is urgent and quay!

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Thursday, 17 July 2003 14:14 (twenty-two years ago)

Great ideas!

note to self-refill desk (and bag) with new Bics.
I still have the urge to plant just one fake entry in the sales database, which I oversee.

They're bringing donuts in for me.

― Kate Silver (Kate Silver), Thursday, 17 July 2003 14:18 (twenty-two years ago)

well licking your *own* donuts is a bit of a lateral move

― mark p (Mark P), Thursday, 17 July 2003 15:00 (twenty-two years ago)

Wait, is this the sexual innuendo thread now?

― NA. (Nick A.), Thursday, 17 July 2003 15:20 (twenty-two years ago)

It's whatever you want it to be, big boy.

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 17 July 2003 15:22 (twenty-two years ago)

if you're leaving suddenly and you work on any kind of big project a really cool thing to do would be to delete the entire thing and all traces of it from all the file servers in your not-very-competent office, then steal all the RAM from your computer and all the boxed software that's laying around that they didn't register and sell it all on EBAY and make a cool $1000. NOT THAT I'VE EVER DONE THIS.

― anthony kyle monday (akmonday), Thursday, 17 July 2003 15:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Um, work diligently, say goodbye politely and get a great reference to take to your next job.

< /fun-hating >

― Mark C (Mark C), Thursday, 17 July 2003 16:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I plan to run magnets over all the hard drives!

― Ally (mlescaut), Thursday, 17 July 2003 16:21 (twenty-two years ago)

bring a firearm to work?

― faggotry (faggotry), Thursday, 17 July 2003 17:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Task three(?) Pub lunch!

― Kate Silver (Kate Silver), Thursday, 17 July 2003 18:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Um, work diligently, say goodbye politely and get a great reference to take to your next job.
< /fun-hating >

Thank you. I was about to say, "last day of work" not necessarily = "got laid off"

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 17 July 2003 18:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Although if you did get laid off by the bastards, good last day of work thing to do is call all the software companies that produced the products your work didn't legally license and blow the whistle.

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 17 July 2003 18:25 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

Bringing acid cake to the afternoon coffe break with your co-workers on your last day of work - c/d?

http://www.expressen.se/index.jsp?a=200879

Freely translated from Swedish:
"Thirteen employees at Bergianska Trädgården in Stockholm collapsed today after being given cake.
- A person who's leaving has brought home baked cake, says the police.
(...)
- Some people describe their pulse racing, others that their heads started spining. We've also heard from people that their bodies were un-controlled. Some have also had hallucinations.
- Everyone is stable now. They're awake and their lives are not at risk."

― Hanna (Hanna), Friday, 29 October 2004 11:15 (twenty-one years ago)

one year passes...

eerie, last day of work. Three years, almost to the day!

― Kate Silver (Kate Silver), Friday, 14 July 2006 17:05 (nineteen years ago)

Email this to everyone!

http://graphics2.snopes.com/risque/graphics/mantle.pdf

― 100% CHAMPS with a Yes! Attitude. (Austin, Still), Friday, 14 July 2006 17:16 (nineteen years ago)

Best dangling modifier ever.

― milo z (mlp), Friday, 14 July 2006 17:18 (nineteen years ago)

Gather materials to make voodoo doll of hated former boss.

― Sara R-C (Sara R-C), Friday, 14 July 2006 17:22 (nineteen years ago)

Tell all your coworkers what everyone else has been saying about them behind their back.
Embellish if necessary. Or even if it isn't.

― Thermo Thinwall (Thermo Thinwall), Friday, 14 July 2006 17:34 (nineteen years ago)

Hey! I just learned that it's my last day at this assignment, too!

Which is great, cause I hate it here and there's usually jack shit to do, but sucks because I don't have anything else lined up yet.

Tempin' ain't easy...

― 100% CHAMPS with a Yes! Attitude. (Austin, Still), Friday, 14 July 2006 18:57 (nineteen years ago)

austin, what kind of work do you do?

― Ms. Misery TX (MissMiseryTX), Friday, 14 July 2006 18:58 (nineteen years ago)

Lately it's been mostly data-entry prole crap.

― 100% CHAMPS with a Yes! Attitude. (Austin, Still), Friday, 14 July 2006 19:01 (nineteen years ago)

I just found out my last day is this coming Tuesday as well. Will be back here Tuesday I guess. heh.

― San Diva Gyna (and a Masala DOsaNUT on the side) (donut), Friday, 14 July 2006 20:25 (nineteen years ago)

Whoa, wha'happen? (Or does this tie in with other stuff mentioned elsewhere?)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 14 July 2006 20:26 (nineteen years ago)

Superglue your manager's desk drawers shut.

― Ben Mott (Ben Mott), Friday, 14 July 2006 20:34 (nineteen years ago)

I missed the memo where it was decreed that fun was the act of turning passive aggression into active aggression. More of you people need to become self-employed.

― Momus (Momus), Saturday, 15 July 2006 10:50 (nineteen years ago)

(Things to do on your last day of self-employment: glue your own drawers shut, stick pins in doll of self, run magnet over own hard drive, lace own cake with acid, go on a shooting-yourself spree...)

― Momus (Momus), Saturday, 15 July 2006 10:52 (nineteen years ago)

Remember when Clinton's staff was clearing out and they took all the W's off the keyboards? Classic.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 15 July 2006 12:50 (nineteen years ago)

two years pass...

???

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:21 (seventeen years ago)

have a nice cup of tea

― Anthony, I am not an Alcoholic & Drunk (darraghmac), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:26 (seventeen years ago)

then what

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:30 (seventeen years ago)

shocked at the speed at which you made the tea, tbh

drink the tea.

sacked, quit or company bust?

― Anthony, I am not an Alcoholic & Drunk (darraghmac), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:35 (seventeen years ago)

i have a little tea set on my desk

i quitted

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:36 (seventeen years ago)

acrimonious circumstances or moving on to better things?

it's all context

― Anthony, I am not an Alcoholic & Drunk (darraghmac), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:38 (seventeen years ago)

better things

i have access to a little dumbwaiter elevator thing to send stuff between floors. kind of kicking myself now for not bringing a live racoon.

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:41 (seventeen years ago)

or something

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:42 (seventeen years ago)

sounds pretty acrimonious.

send round a pic of you doing 'the chicken' maybe.

― Anthony, I am not an Alcoholic & Drunk (darraghmac), Friday, 20 March 2009 15:43 (seventeen years ago)

Photocopy like a beast, print off the entire internet, go raid the stationary cupboard...

― krakow, Friday, 20 March 2009 17:14 (seventeen years ago)

that donut suggestion upthread made me really want donuts

― 14 karat gold steen computer wizard (BIG HOOS aka the steendriver), Friday, 20 March 2009 17:34 (seventeen years ago)

i got drunk

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 18:58 (seventeen years ago)

instead of those things

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 18:58 (seventeen years ago)

not really drunbk but def wobbly legs burpy

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 18:59 (seventeen years ago)

magnified ny bad office lighting and my boss talking to me about something RIGHT NOW like what lay off im done get it im done

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 19:00 (seventeen years ago)

anyways thank you ilx as always yourew wonderful

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 19:00 (seventeen years ago)

i like u

― fap fap fap wtf crazy caps self-publishe... (1) (rent), Friday, 20 March 2009 19:01 (seventeen years ago)

you could always take a dump on the floor and "peace"

― unexpected item in bagging area (sarahel), Friday, 20 March 2009 19:16 (seventeen years ago)

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