I got lost in the woods, WTF

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So we have garbage pickup every monday morning but I forgot to take mine out. So today while cleaning house I had to go take my bag out to the nearest dumpster, which is in a parking lot belonging to a condo complex on the other side of the winding creek behind my house. They have running trails and footbridges in the woods between, so it was pretty easy getting over there.

While walking to the dumpster and having a smoke I was thinking about a bunch of other stuff and not really paying attention etc., so on the way back I ended up taking a wrong turn. This was followed by backpedaling, turning around again, going too far in the other direction, and finally reaching a high enough vantage point to where I could see my house again and get my bearings. I was bumbling around in the woods in my OWN BACK YARD for like twenty minutes. What the fuck.

Millar (Millar), Thursday, 31 July 2003 21:43 (twenty-two years ago)

"WTF"? What, are you hanging out with Ally or something?

Chris P (Chris P), Thursday, 31 July 2003 21:44 (twenty-two years ago)

And this is the guy taught to be an Army man?;>

Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 31 July 2003 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Air Force. We don't do that orienteering shit.

Millar (Millar), Thursday, 31 July 2003 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

That's obvious, babe

Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Thursday, 31 July 2003 21:55 (twenty-two years ago)

wtf is "wtf" my thing for, wtf. Remember when my thing used to be "hello?" and "pff". Those were the days, motherfuckers.

Tom I think you should start wearing a homing device maybe?

Ally (mlescaut), Friday, 1 August 2003 01:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I got lost in the woods today too. We knew where we were, just that it was not where we wanted to be. So we sat on a sunny bluff eating and looking at orchids, and consulted the GPS. Maybe you should get a gps, they're only $400 or so. I am very impressed that you could get your bearings. I have no sense of direction.

isadora (isadora), Friday, 1 August 2003 03:51 (twenty-two years ago)

$400? I bought one for $150 over a year ago--probably a lil cheaper now.

oops (Oops), Friday, 1 August 2003 04:40 (twenty-two years ago)

No orienteering? What do you do if you crash the plane and have to eject in the middle of nowhere?

Girolamo Savonarola, Friday, 1 August 2003 04:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Dude, didn't you see "The Blair Witch Project"? Didn't you read "Into the Wild"? STAY OUT OF THE WOODS, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!!"

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 1 August 2003 05:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, right, like any self-respecting axe-murder would dare to mess with Millar.

Matt DC (Matt DC), Friday, 1 August 2003 08:32 (twenty-two years ago)

you get orienteering/living-in-woods training only if they plan to actually let you ride on a plane as part of your mission, which in my case they do not.

Millar (Millar), Friday, 1 August 2003 10:27 (twenty-two years ago)

In my youth they built compasses into shoes.

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Friday, 1 August 2003 11:52 (twenty-two years ago)

I have no sense of direction at all. I have not only got lost in the woods, I get lost in stupid places like the mall.

Larcole (Nicole), Friday, 1 August 2003 11:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Heavens! Get yourself an AWAC ;-)

Yesterday, while taking a shower, I forgot if I had washed my hair.

lawrence kansas (lawrence kansas), Friday, 1 August 2003 12:03 (twenty-two years ago)

I've been lost in the woods for 4 days once. I went camping in the Big South Fork National Park, using a trail-book from the late 70s, and the trail we were on just piddled out after about a quarter of a mile. We took a break for a snack and to check out the view from a conveniently placed overlook. We saw another one across the valley we wanted to get to. We went there. 3 days went by before we realized we had no idea how to get back to the trail-head, much less the cars. With a compass + using the map in the trail-book (and ignoring the long-gone trails on it), me and my bwoy M1c4h found our way back to the trail and marked a path with red-strings tied to tree branches back to where we were camping. That was a hella good camping trip, honestly.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 1 August 2003 12:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Never get out of the boat.

kephm, Friday, 1 August 2003 12:41 (twenty-two years ago)

Never get out of the boat.


HAhahahahahaha.......bye bye tiger!

Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 1 August 2003 12:42 (twenty-two years ago)

In my youth they built compasses into shoes.

Very handy for drawing circles with your feet, both clockwise and anticlockwise. It's a bugger if you stick the spike in your toe, though.

caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 1 August 2003 12:59 (twenty-two years ago)

were psychedelics involved in this woods trip nick?

Chris V. (Chris V), Friday, 1 August 2003 13:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Well, I wasn't not eating shrooms.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 1 August 2003 14:12 (twenty-two years ago)

When I was a little kid I had shoes which had special soles which made animal track shapes in the mud when you walked. If you;d had some of those, you could have followed the paw prints and made it home in no time at all.

C J (C J), Friday, 1 August 2003 14:15 (twenty-two years ago)

(or accidentally come face-to-face with a real bear, I suppose)

C J (C J), Friday, 1 August 2003 14:16 (twenty-two years ago)

crikey! just how big is this back yard of yours millar?

Chris Radford (Chris Radford), Saturday, 2 August 2003 08:14 (twenty-two years ago)


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