I Am God

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I got my printer to work. bow.

― Mike Hanle y, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

You manipulated with the power of your mind and commanded it to work? That totally rules!

― jel, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Now channel th thoughts from the computer through to your printer making it mobile. Sorta like a fax but cooler.

― Mr Noodles, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I think today I shall create a Chicken/ bear. What continent would you like it on?

― Mike Hanle y, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Continent? Can't you just will one of those as well? How about a north american antarctican chicken/bear?

― hank, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I'd like my chickenbear incontinent, please.. with a side of sweet potatoes. Thank you.

― Brian MacDonald, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Brian = perv

― Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

The chicken bear will feast mainly on Inuit people

― Mike Hanle y, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y you fuck. My printer went kablooey today. This must be some sort of karma/equilibrium thing. Can anyone help: one ink cartridge ran out, replaced it with new one, but no ink will flow from new one (and yes cap is off, and cartridge isn't dried up). Curses!

― AP, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I think that God (a/k/a Hanle y) should have a swarm of chickenbears descend upon Osama bin Laden.

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Well AP, you shouldn't have stolen that Yorkie bar.

― Mike Hanle y, Wednesday, 3 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I do not understand how fixing printer = omnipotence. Explain please.

― DG, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

SILENCE DG! Obviously you have never had to handle such matters!

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

A-salaam Hanle y!

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

yeah but do you have a fucken donkey, Mr. God?

― satan's donkey, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Dude, I got so p.o'ed with my palm V I don't even use it any more. Writing letters conveys feelings more accurately anyway. At least you have time to think.

― nature's romance, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

perhaps I shoudl create a worm whale

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I like chicken bears better. Better eatin' on a chicken bear than a worm whale. Plus I have a worm phobia.

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

WORM WHALE NOW!! Shai hulud = old man of the desert

― prescient spice, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

"I am God"... From some Doctor film, yeah? "I don't think I'm God. I AM God." Or summat like that. Plus LAWNMOWER MAN - "I am God here..."

― Kodanshi, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

could you arrange for Seinfeld to be on at a decent time?

thanx

― Alan Trewartha, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

can you locate my pants?

and my copy of "love in the time of swine flu."

― jess, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y is ducking the question! You are not even remotely divine.

― DG, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

He may not be divine but he must have some sort of special powers. Have you ever tried to fix a printer? It's a damn tricky business, let me tell you.

― Richard Tunnicliffe, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Alright, I'll concede he might be some kind of superhero, but I will not worship him.

― DG, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Is the Answer to life,the universe and everything really 42? and why must a man walk down so many roads?

― Hank, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Poor urban planning is generally the answer to your second question.

― Tom, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

The answer to the first is yes, but only if you think the question is 'What's the value of Hubble's constant to the nearest integer?'.

― Richard Tunnicliffe, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Thanks. Maybe I'll sleep better nights. Can you make my head stop hurting? I promise I'll never rink again.

― Hank, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Thanks. Maybe I'll sleep better nights. Can you make my head stop hurting? I promise I'll never Drink again.

― Hank, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

1 Not even I can control Seinfeld. 2 Jess your pants are being licked with delight by Gorbachev 3 DG Your lack of faith will land you in Hell . 4 The answer to life universe and every thing is actually 42.4, and a man must walk so much becuase he doesnt have a car. 5 Hubbles quesion = "plurfff fleck" I can't explain more than that 6 Hank I will make your head stop hurting if you say 12 Hail Hanle ys

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Right! That's it! I declare myself to be the AntiHanle y, and will fight you to the last, you great tart.

― DG, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I supose we can now find DG in the woods with a small cult conducting animal sacrifices tsk tsk

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y you should teach DG a lesson, land a giant tart on his head. Show us your powers!

― jel, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I work in silly ways

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Maybe he'll be trampled by chicken Bears, or slimed by the Mighty Worm Whale.

― Hank, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Dear God:

Please smite a co-worker of mine (you know who...I've been praying long enough)...ideally with lighting bolts to the sensitive bits. But what you think best would be fine.

― j.lu, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

j/lu I shall make their genitals get caught in the cd rom drive and their house shall be smitten with a plague of Jehova's witnesses

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y Deus, as a mighty animal creating diety, I was wondering...are you responsible for El Chupacabra?

― jel, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Almighty Hanle y, thank you. (Incidentaly, you also answered another question of mine..."how can a just and loving God create Jehovah's Witnesses and similar pests"?)

― j.lu, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Nno Jel . El Chupacabra has always existed. BEfore this world it was from Dimension 13, and it was shaped like Chris Farely's left nipple

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I do not fear the Hanle y. Remember, if you acknowledge him as your God, then Kansas City is surely paradise. Think about THAT!

― DG, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Almighty Great and Merciful Hanle y ... gimme money! And pay off my school loans!

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y ... ILE's Money Buddha.

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

are you there god? it's me, ethan.

― ethan, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

does this mean ethan is getting his first period?

― jess, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Tadeusz, you must first journey to the highest mountain or Stroumia . there you will find a box of twinkies. eat of them. then return in 2 years.

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 4 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Who created Dimension 13?

― jel, Friday, 5 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Andy Grifith

― Mike Hanle y, Monday, 8 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Haha! ethan and jess are very funny.

― Kim, Monday, 8 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

actually, ethan is due for his 34th peroid next week

― Mike Hanle y, Monday, 8 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Thankyou, Earthman.

― jel, Monday, 8 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

No problem, toothpaste

― Mike Hanle y, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y, I have fixed my printer! What are the implications & obligations re: deity status?

― AP, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Hanle y, you are within 40 posts or so of overtaking anthony. Thy powers increaseth.

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Wednesday, 10 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

I just bought a new printer - and it works - does that count in the deification thing?

― toraneko, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

AP, I'm afraid it was I who really fixed it. I thought I'd let you think you did for my own amusement. heh ehehe

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

i don't believe in Hanle y Deus.

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Thursday, 11 October 2001 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

three months pass...

time to revive this thread! hail hanle y!

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Sunday, 20 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

three months pass...

O Hanle y Deus, my zip drive at work is on the fritz. Think you can get it to work? Or at least send a crew of chickenbears to fuck it up some more?

― Tadeusz Suchodolski, Wednesday, 24 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

if you take out the space in his last name he becomes mortal for ten seconds

that is the time to strike and kill him with the spear of ages

― bc, Wednesday, 24 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

ILE Fritz?

(Due to exec panicing in an interview, Iomega will give you a new one for life, ha)

― Graham, Wednesday, 24 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

Who can know eternity? Only the Pink Panzer.

― Mike Hanle y, Thursday, 25 April 2002 00:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

one year passes...

Truly Hanle y is the son of Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad

― omg, Monday, 1 March 2004 20:25 (twenty years ago) link

four years pass...

^^^^

― Eisbaer, Sunday, 6 April 2008 02:13 (sixteen years ago) link

I work in silly ways

― Abbott, Sunday, 6 April 2008 18:07 (sixteen years ago) link

Welcome, God

― gabbneb, Sunday, 6 April 2008 18:09 (sixteen years ago) link

heh, heston tribute, eisbaer?

― Frogman Henry, Sunday, 6 April 2008 18:11 (sixteen years ago) link

seven years pass...

http://www.spiegel.de/panorama/justiz/ex-femen-aktivistin-josephine-witt-wegen-koelner-dom-protest-vor-gericht-a-1036742.html

http://cdn3.spiegel.de/images/image-583786-panoV9free-ubkj.jpg

― j., Tuesday, 2 June 2015 20:49 (eight years ago) link

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