Texans, Their Vibrators, and Narcotics Officers

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i think i know at least one person who might be shakin' in her boots over this:

Texas housewife busted for hawking erotic toys
Sales rep for Brisbane firm sold vibrator to undercover agents
A Texas housewife is in big trouble with the law for selling a vibrator to a pair of undercover cops, and the Brisbane vibrator company she works for says Texas is an "antiquated place'' with more than its share of "prudes.''
Joanne Webb, a former fifth-grade teacher and mother of three, was in a county court in Cleburne, Texas, on Monday to answer obscenity charges for selling the vibrator to undercover narcotics officers posing as a dysfunctional married couple in search of a sex aid...
Webb, a saleswoman for Passion Parties of Brisbane, faces a year in jail and a $4,000 fine if convicted.

"What I did was not obscene,'' Webb said. ""What's obscene is that the government is taking action about what we do in our bedrooms.''
The arrest of Webb in Cleburne, a small town 50 miles southwest of Dallas, was the first time that any of the company's 3,000 sales consultants have been busted, said Pat Davis, the president of Passion Parties. She said the company was outraged by the charges and stood behind Webb.
"It makes you wonder what they're thinking out there in Texas,'' Davis said. "They sound like prudes, with antiquated laws. They must have all their street crime under control in Texas if they're going to spend tax money arresting us.''
For the past year, Webb has sold the company's line of vibrators, gels, lubricants, strawberry-flavored nipple cream and "edible passion puddings.'' The merchandise is offered for sale in private, Tupperware-style parties to women who may be reluctant to visit an adult novelty store.
Among the company's top items are a $12 jar of passion pudding in chocolate and strawberry flavors ("apply head to toe, wherever you want your lover to linger"), a $9 jar of nipple cream in strawberry, raspberry and watermelon flavors, and battery-powered vibrators that sell for $17 to $140. The company also offers such lubricants as Slippery Stuff ($13), Lickety Lube ($12) and Lucky Stiff ($11.50), and a $22 battery-powered item for men known as Jelly Julie ("with soft jelly silicone lips").
"Our products are not obscene,'' Davis said. "All we're trying to do is help people build loving relationships.''
Webb suspects she got in trouble because she ruffled feathers in town by daring to join the Chamber of Commerce with her sex toy business. She said her arrest had caused her husband of 20 years to suffer a nervous breakdown.
Webb said she was amazed that the town's narcotics squad would be put on the case.
"We have a real problem with drugs in our schools,'' she said, "and they're using our narcotics officers to entrap me for selling a vibrator.''

― El Santo Claus (Kingfish), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 22:27 (twenty-two years ago)

Now, what i wanna know, what the FUCK is an "edible passion pudding"?

― El Santo Claus (Kingfish), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 22:29 (twenty-two years ago)

Not had any, but if you're using it correctly, you won't really worry about the taste.

I'm applauding her: I'd have paid her, then gave her a few referrals--not busted her. Prudes.

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

B3nny H!nn is also based in texas.

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 22:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Sounds like a cunning plan for these cops to get free vibrators, if you ask me.

― petra jane (petra jane), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 22:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Geez, theres a shop round the corner from me called Passiofruit that sells this kind of stuff happily, and they even had a sort of sculpture of the female er, genitalia, made out of folds of hanging pink velvet, hanging in the window for a while!

Man I'm glad I live where I do.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 23:43 (twenty-two years ago)

Wait, thats sounded a bit wrong...

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 23:43 (twenty-two years ago)

can you recommend that store trayce? er, a friend and i are going shopping soon...

― the surface noise (electricsound), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 23:49 (twenty-two years ago)

It's a bit rude to call out Dee like that!

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 23:55 (twenty-two years ago)

ah hell, I thought this would be about Sam.

― M Matos (M Matos), Tuesday, 16 December 2003 23:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Matos at first I thought, ahem, this might have something to do with me and then i saw the 'officers' bit and remembered last night's news. :)

the news station led off the story by standing in front of a sex toy shop on Lower Greenville where I had just shopped 4 days ago. haha. I went in looking for, well, a portable vibrator but the comic-book-guy-like guys behind the counter were creeping me out so I just bought stockings.

I went to one of the parties this lady was running when I lived in Austin and thought about doing it myself.

Keep in mind the city/county where she lives is basically Arlen, Texas (Hank Hill's ficitional home). My grandmother, Aunt and mom live there.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 00:52 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, it was "officers" that made me realize.

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 00:55 (twenty-two years ago)

tom delay is a real dick, so he can't stand to see fake ones around.

― fortunate hazel (f. hazel), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Jim - hahah :D its in Bridge road Richmond, it looks like one of those shops that sells "tasteful" adult games, toys and whatnot. I dunno if they venture into the ClubX territory of actual sex toys/porn mags - it may do but I havent been inside. Loads of nice kinky underwear in the front display window tho! ;)

Gee I wonder why you're interested anwyay *coff coff* ;P

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:24 (twenty-two years ago)

a little horizon broadening shall i say

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:27 (twenty-two years ago)

heh heh heh.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:30 (twenty-two years ago)

*drifts away on a cloud of bliss*

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Ah, sex toys are great.

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:45 (twenty-two years ago)

i was just thinking... for texas, the obvious solution is to make a vibrator that is also a gun.

― fortunate hazel (f. hazel), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Or a BURGERPIPE.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:56 (twenty-two years ago)

aww man

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I wish the term "burgerpipe" didn't make me hungry.

― kirsten (kirsten), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

you can have my semiautomatic sex toy when you pry it from my cold, dead... well you know.

― fortunate hazel (f. hazel), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 02:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I think the thread title alone could hold its ground...even without an explanation.

― El Spinktor (El Spinktor), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 04:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't make me break out the asspipe video. I haven't yet exposed you guys to it and I'm not sure if you're ready.

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 04:32 (twenty-two years ago)

You havent exposed your asspipe to us. My my my. I phe4r.

― Trayce (trayce), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 04:54 (twenty-two years ago)

I would *LOVE* a vibrator shaped like a gun. . .
I can't believe I haven't seen this before?!@"!

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 09:22 (twenty-two years ago)

i have. no more questions

― the surface noise (electricsound), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 09:38 (twenty-two years ago)

sam, check out the bracelet/earring set (and the other stuff on this page is great too!):

http://www.girlshop.com/shop/girls/ex/exclusive.asp

― teeny (teeny), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 16:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Edible passion pudding helps make the inedible edible.

― andy, Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:05 (twenty-two years ago)

They had a gun shaped vibrator in an old issue of BUST.

― tokyo rosemary (rosemary), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:26 (twenty-two years ago)

sweeeet.

Did I tell you guys how my tattoo artist wanted to ink this elaborate gunbelt around my waist with a six shooter strapped to my thigh? I told him I would do it if I could have a dildo in the holster instead of a gun.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:32 (twenty-two years ago)

That news story just made me furious. I'm gonna go jerk off till I DIE. Take that, Texas!

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Maybe the Brisbane chief of police saw Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and became concerned over potential dildo-as-bludgeoning-instrument* issues.

*no not that way

― nate detritus (natedetritus), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Yes, I feel like buying my girlfriend a new vibrator. From Texas.

― Jordan (Jordan), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Although they're probably rigged with explosives or something.

― Jordan (Jordan), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:52 (twenty-two years ago)

they're normal here. such things just have to be clearly labeled and marketed as "massagers" or "for novelty only." I believe dildos have to be labeled as an "educational device." I shit you not.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:54 (twenty-two years ago)

people suck.

― El Santo Claus (Kingfish), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 19:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Peaches for Governor

http://www.beggars.com/us/peaches/promo-alt/promo04-peaches.jpg

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 22:21 (twenty-two years ago)

she'd make a better governor than musician, undoubtedly

― M Matos (M Matos), Wednesday, 17 December 2003 22:25 (twenty-two years ago)

teeny what was the necklace/braclet on that link? must've changed. i was afraid to click it at school in case it involved peni.

― A Girl Named Sam (thatgirl), Thursday, 18 December 2003 04:34 (twenty-two years ago)

You know, Jeanne, I've seen that pic before, but somehow I didn't notice the bit poking out.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 18 December 2003 16:44 (twenty-two years ago)

open it in a new window, close the window, and then open it again, for some reason it works then! It's a bracelet/earring set with little shoe and gun charms!

― teeny (teeny), Thursday, 18 December 2003 17:49 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

She's now going to trial

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 11 February 2004 19:08 (twenty-two years ago)

(Not Peaches, unfortunately -- the Texan sex shop woman)

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 11 February 2004 19:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I swear to G0d, shit like this makes me NUTS with rage.

― Jeanne Fury (Jeanne Fury), Wednesday, 11 February 2004 19:26 (twenty-two years ago)

we still get to play with toys though jeanne. trust me

― Viva La Sam (thatgirl), Thursday, 12 February 2004 04:43 (twenty-two years ago)

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