TOTALLY URGENT -- how do i book a cheap flight from boston or portland to chicago?

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right.

listen to this, right.

midnight, i'm just back from the gym. ready for a sandwich and a glass of wine. relaxed friday night. it's totally silent. i think about watching a west wing DVD.

then the phone rings -- and my friday night is about to get a whole lot more exciting.

some mate of mine from london is in america on the rebound from a 4-year relationship. he repeats at least 3 times that he needs me to book him a flight from boston to chicago... "because.. i'm totally in love with someone, and i've got to tell her". then he says "if anyone knows the internet m8, you do."

i ask him if he's drunk but he says, "stone cold sober, m8. stone cold sober."

err.. what do i do. where do i book this nutcase a cheap flight from boston or portland to chicago?

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:23 (twenty-two years ago)

it has to be an e-ticket by the way.

i think totally fucking fated to be a disaster, but what the fuck do i know..

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:24 (twenty-two years ago)

um, www.priceline.com? www.travelocity.com? (shrugs, these are my best guesses... not optimal flying times, but if he's "got to tell her", he probably won't care.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:27 (twenty-two years ago)

well since i'm not flying, i certainly don't fucking care! =P

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

"ok m8, I got you a flight from boston to chicago.. thing is, the layover is in tel aviv. i had no other choice..."

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:31 (twenty-two years ago)

tel aviv, kentucky! right next to Lebanon.

― oops (Oops), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:32 (twenty-two years ago)

we have this ryanair/easyjet budget airline phenomenon where i'm from, and i was wondering if there were US equivalents.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:34 (twenty-two years ago)

ok, this is fuckin mental. see on priceline.com, it says "name your own price". i put $150 in and got an offer for $175 (arlines choose flight times)

should i go back and put $100 in?

this is fuckin mental.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Try $10.. Try $1!

but I think it offered $175 because that might be the cheapest option. then again, airlines in general are mental.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:39 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't think those pricks will accept a non-US visa.. =(

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:42 (twenty-two years ago)

So, you can be a non-citizen living in America on a visa, but you can't use planes?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:48 (twenty-two years ago)

If he's already in America, all he needs is his i.d. to go from U.S. city to U.S. city... or am I missing something?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:48 (twenty-two years ago)

noooooo... i mean they won't take my credit card details because i have to put a US state in the box!

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:49 (twenty-two years ago)

funny

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:50 (twenty-two years ago)

WWW.SITE59.COM - i use it often. problem is it's a package deal with either hotel or rental car, but it's still gonna be way less expensive than any other last minute option I know of. (except maybe priceline or hotwire but of course with those you DON'T KNOW WHEN YOU'RE LEAVING, or coming back, which can put a mighty crimp in your social planning)

― Aaron A., Friday, 30 April 2004 22:50 (twenty-two years ago)

there's no options for international cards?

Also, stupid question, but does he HAVE to do this face to face? Can't he call her?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, can't he do this himself? He probably has some form of a U.S. credit card by now if he's been in a 4-year relationship, right?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:53 (twenty-two years ago)

no man, his so-called relationship was in the UK. he is in the US on holiday. and is in love already, apparently..

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:55 (twenty-two years ago)

and this is supposed to be going on my visa card. what kind of sucker am i.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:57 (twenty-two years ago)

an all-day one?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:57 (twenty-two years ago)

He got the U.S. from the U.K... why can't he go to some internet cafe (which surely must exist in Boston), go to priceline.com, and do this himself, then? Aren't there travel agents in Boston, too?

I have far more questions (as far as whether you're about to drop money only to completely freak out some girl in chicago) but I'll save those for later

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 22:59 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah does she know he's coming?

― oops (Oops), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:00 (twenty-two years ago)

I mean, the guy said "stone cold sober, m8. stone cold sober."
a) did he SOUND sober, and b) if he was, why is he asking someone across the Atlantic to do this type of mental shit for him?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:00 (twenty-two years ago)

are you a lawyer or something? all these fucking questions.

i actually have a lot of questions too but there's no point asking with this guy, and, i mean, if he's going into psychological meltdown anyway, there's only so much i can do from across the atlantic.

i think he may be out of cash. i think he knows the girl from before. and i'm sure he'll get more sex out of all this if he goes to the effort of telling her in person.

btw, it's amazing the way people confuse love with the need for a relationship.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:01 (twenty-two years ago)

well i mean it's only like 7 or 8 o clock in portland right now. people in america don't get drunk that early, right?

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:02 (twenty-two years ago)

*burp*

― oops (Oops), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:03 (twenty-two years ago)

In Portland, Maine, or Portland, Oregon?

Either way, it's always Beer O'Clock in both cities.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually it's only 5 pm in Portland Oregon, so that means they're not only drunk but passed out.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:05 (twenty-two years ago)

i thought american people were against alcohol, or something.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:05 (twenty-two years ago)

John Barleycorn MUST DIE!

I'd say tell the guy to contact the nearest travel agent, have him explain his situation, and hopefully he'll get the right advice.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Because it seems the obstacle is the source of the cash for the flight, not the flight itself. Maybe you can figure out how to make some sort of Paypal/International money transfer somehow.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:06 (twenty-two years ago)

aye that's all very well, but remember, "nobody knows the internet like (i) do", apparently..

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:07 (twenty-two years ago)

"it seems the obstacle is the source of the cash for the flight, not the flight itself"

are you an actual lawyer or something?

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:07 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm an actual internet knower

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:08 (twenty-two years ago)

and also a DQ fan! The Yes piece converted me.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:08 (twenty-two years ago)

what is DQ? those are my initials.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:09 (twenty-two years ago)

don't dis the Flurry

― Aaron A., Friday, 30 April 2004 23:09 (twenty-two years ago)

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:10 (twenty-two years ago)

another DQ

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Both delicious

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:11 (twenty-two years ago)

huh.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Are you one, the other, or neither?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Anyway, you realize, if your m8 is going to chicago, he's going to need cash to somehow come back.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

you're sort of funny.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

hang on are you taking the piss out of me =O

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

I hope not. I don't drink piss.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:15 (twenty-two years ago)

(sorry, one of those "States" jokes)

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:15 (twenty-two years ago)

aye you are a funny lass. is that your real email address? maybe we could meet up and have kids or something, when i go to america.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:16 (twenty-two years ago)

FINAL ADVICE:

Have your m8 contact a travel agent (just tell him to find a phone book and ask him to find any fucking one), have him explain his situation, that he needs a flight to chicago ASAP and as cheap as possible, and he should ask how he can be assisted in somehow getting cash from you, given that both of you are non-Americans. These things surely can be worked. That's all I can offer right now.

PS how would you like your kids? w/ custard? jelly?

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:19 (twenty-two years ago)

she left. i think i just destroyed something beautiful.

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:21 (twenty-two years ago)

stick around for the end of this thread when DB announces his secret gender!

― Aaron A., Friday, 30 April 2004 23:21 (twenty-two years ago)

my gender:

http://gammatron.novarese.net/images/2003/03/18/cicf.png

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:22 (twenty-two years ago)

do you mean i invented this whole big problem just to get to talk to donut bitch and she's a guy?

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Aaron is confused.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:26 (twenty-two years ago)

my last photo taken of me:

http://www.educationworld.com/a_curr/images/donut.jpg

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:27 (twenty-two years ago)

(aww i think she likes the attention. isn't she sweet!)

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:28 (twenty-two years ago)

I have to help pick up a m8 from the UK in just a few hours myself. he will certainly be more knowledgable of ways to help you out, DQ. *smooch*

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:30 (twenty-two years ago)

so with that I must go. I'll be back.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:30 (twenty-two years ago)

i got a kiss..

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:33 (twenty-two years ago)

www.southwest.com -- should be about 100 bucks each way. I doubt you'll find anything cheaper, but you should try www.hotwire.com just in case.

Is the priceline $175 round trip? If it is, you should probably take it.

― Kris (aqueduct), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:51 (twenty-two years ago)

BTW, he'd be flying out of Providence if he took Southwest, which is an hour from Boston.

― Kris (aqueduct), Friday, 30 April 2004 23:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Also check www.orbitz.com. And may i just be on record as saying that this is probably a bad idea? Unless he get's a reality tv film crew to come along and film it all for us of course.

― mouse, Saturday, 1 May 2004 00:11 (twenty-two years ago)

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE! She wants to see him!

― DQ (danny quintana), Saturday, 1 May 2004 01:41 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.mit.edu/people/cktruong/love.jpg

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 1 May 2004 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

I have concerns about this thread.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 1 May 2004 02:17 (twenty-two years ago)

Man, this thread showed up, and I was already plum out of asshat stickers. How am I gonna put a badge on it?

― martin m. (mushrush), Saturday, 1 May 2004 02:59 (twenty-two years ago)

my heart is jumping. what's the progress on this chicago love for MISTER M8?

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 2 May 2004 06:38 (twenty-two years ago)

one month passes...

it went well, sort of. i think they did the biz.

he told me he freaked out in chicago after saying goodbye to her, started crying the street, people were coming up to him saying "are you alright my son" etc.

aye.

now he is trying to find her a job over here.

nutter.

― DQ (danny quintana), Thursday, 3 June 2004 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Sounds like!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 3 June 2004 00:42 (twenty-two years ago)

ach g0d bless him!

http://www.geh.org/ne/str085/m197935240001.jpg

― DQ (danny quintana), Thursday, 3 June 2004 00:49 (twenty-two years ago)

ah that's where your picture went tickle!*

― saza bob, Thursday, 3 June 2004 16:15 (twenty-two years ago)

fancy seeing you round here =)

― DQ (danny quintana), Friday, 4 June 2004 00:36 (twenty-two years ago)

oh i get around....

― saza bob, Wednesday, 16 June 2004 01:22 (twenty-two years ago)

oh good, it's you.

i'm feeling a bit lost, whatwith events and all...

― DQ (danny quintana), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 10:20 (twenty-two years ago)

i got my gmail by the way!

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40273000/jpg/_40273249_larsson270.jpg

― DQ (danny quintana), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 10:32 (twenty-two years ago)

hee hee. did you win the gmail comp after all? fantastico!

― saza bob, Sunday, 20 June 2004 03:18 (twenty-two years ago)

one year passes...

http://www.stevenyazzie.com/2003/images/The%20Model%20and%20the%20Donut%202003.jpg

― iDonut B4 x86 (donut), Thursday, 27 October 2005 04:31 (twenty years ago)

Why revive this thread?

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 27 October 2005 04:55 (twenty years ago)

http://www.thursdaybicycles.com/grafix/why_not_mini.jpg

― iDonut B4 x86 (donut), Thursday, 27 October 2005 09:43 (twenty years ago)

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