Two Weeks of Complete and Utter Bedrest

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Sadly, it looks like I'm up for a bit of surgery in the not-too-distant future. The cutting and pasting itself is outpatient, but I will be chock full of stitches in a--ahem--very, very delicate area, and will be confined to bed for a full 14 days of bedrest and healing. By this my surgeon means absolutely no sitting up or getting out of bed except to 1) go to the potty and 2) take the occasional bath. Very, very important not to develop scar tissue in the--ahem--aforementioned delicate area.

I would very much appreciate the detailing of similar experiences and advice for how the hell to not go absolutely shit bonkers while confined to 14 days in bed in my tiny apartment. Husband will be available to prepare meals, do the housekeeping, etc. when he gets home from work in the evening, but how am I not to die of boredom the rest of the time?

What I will have available: books, TV and DVD player purchased especially for the surgical occasion, cell phone, percocet (which I've never taken--I'd like some details on that, too, please).

What I will not have: laptop, internet access, patience. Will be home alone most of the day while husband is at work. Can do a little work of my own if possible on painkillers???

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:05 (twenty years ago) link

Please relate experience and advice (esp. preparations and time killing ideas) thusly.

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:07 (twenty years ago) link

Lots of DVDs & a hired laptop are the order the day. Good luck with that, sounds harsh!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:08 (twenty years ago) link

I imagine I shall get quite fat during my confinement???

Good god, will I develop bedsores???

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:09 (twenty years ago) link

Not if you keep moving, it's only 2 weeks!! I can't speak from experience but like I said, it's only 2 weeks, so you're not going to put that much weight on!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:10 (twenty years ago) link

Videogames. Get a couple RPGs and you'll never even notice that you've been in bed for five, er, two, weeks.

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:11 (twenty years ago) link

stretching!
I think two weeks would be the limit on how long I could do something like this. Just long enough to really feel decadent and indulgent, but not quite long enough to go all wrong in the brain.

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:12 (twenty years ago) link

If you get a game like resident evil (for example) it'll keep you hooked as you have to go through the game.

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:13 (twenty years ago) link

I haven't played a videogame since PacMan at family outings to Godfather's pizza! That is a fantastic idea! What sort of stuff do I need and what sort of games should I play?

I don't think I'm too into shooting thinks but hey, maybe I will discover a whole different side of myself via percocet.

Now what is the deal with percocet? I've only taken a painkiller once--lortab (sp?) after my wisdom teeth came out. I hated it very much and made due with Tylenol the rest of the recovery. My doctor is convinced I'm not going to be able to hack it without something stronger this time around.

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:17 (twenty years ago) link

percocet is a dream. as long as you've got it, you're not going to mind what else is going on.

― lauren (laurenp), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:18 (twenty years ago) link

Get some Sun Ra records to help with the heavy duty painkillers.

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:18 (twenty years ago) link

thinks=things, obv.

Xpost

Will it make it feel like my feet are not attached to my body? 'Cause I didn't like that so much!

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:18 (twenty years ago) link

A phone is U&K aswell!

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:19 (twenty years ago) link

What is this Sims thing I've heard about. Should I get that or does it require an undrugaddled brain?

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:20 (twenty years ago) link

i second pink's suggestion of hiring a laptop. it could make such a big difference to your enjoyment.

if it were me, i'd also schedule friends to visit before you go in, and make sure they're booked in for the end of the two weeks. that way they don't all turn up the first day and then not again, and it gives you something to look forward to (especially if you do it like every other day or something)

also, buy every single trashy magazine that you would normally be embarrassed to buy-- all the gossip mags, all the fashion, whatever floats your boat. you'll want light entertainment and pretty pictures and short attention span stuff, i'm guessing.

(all of this is just an educated guess, by the way)

― colette (a2lette), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:21 (twenty years ago) link

ha ha -- I realized that the way I describe it, it sounds like I'm having sex-change surgery!

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:22 (twenty years ago) link

(are you?)

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:22 (twenty years ago) link

I don't think The Sims takes too much brain power or reflexes, might be a good one.

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:24 (twenty years ago) link

great, one more thing to worry about. I will have to write on my lower abdomen: "do not attach penis!"

xpost

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:24 (twenty years ago) link

you know, in case there is one of those "oops I amputated the wrong leg" hospital errors.

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:25 (twenty years ago) link

you still haven't stated clearly for the record that you are not becoming a man.

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:26 (twenty years ago) link

I would think that becoming a man would take more surgery than could be recovered from in two weeks time! Then again, them boy parts don't seem as complicated as my girl parts.

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:29 (twenty years ago) link

What Lauren said about Percocet, and Colette said about magazines. I had enforced bedrest after an operation and totally loved becoming reacquainted with trashy daytime TV also, thanks to the percocet in no small part. Weaning myself off it and onto xtra strength tylenol was kind of annoying. I had a couple uneasy nights during the switch.

Also, Mad Libs--can be played over the phone too so you don't have to wait for a visitor necessarily.

― sgs (sgs), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:32 (twenty years ago) link

Definitely organise several friends to visit for lunch. (get them to bring the lunch!)

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:32 (twenty years ago) link

I guess this is one of those times when I wish I had a larger local social circle. Actually, there are many ILXors I would love to come provide company and entertainment. So ya'll book some tickets to D.C., 'K? We have pandas!

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:36 (twenty years ago) link

Are they Giant Pandas?

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:39 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.diskidee.nl/images/g/gameboyadvancesp.jpg

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:39 (twenty years ago) link

Especially: POKEMON.

― Sarah (starry), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:44 (twenty years ago) link

Also, can you really not get hold of a laptop? Play the sympathy card!

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:53 (twenty years ago) link

I'm thinking I can probably snag a laptop. I guess the real issue is that without internet access, I'm at a bit of a loss about what to do with it beyond solitaire. Clearly I will have to become addicted to good games. So please recommend your favorites (Pokemon? And what is that thing Jordan posted?).

Huck: yes, the are GIANT (and possibly preggers, too!)

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 14:59 (twenty years ago) link

Can you get a broadband trial possibly?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:00 (twenty years ago) link

when do you want me to be there?

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:00 (twenty years ago) link

Um, can we cuddle these pandas?

― Pinkpanther (Pinkpanther), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:01 (twenty years ago) link

Cuddle them TO DEATH!

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:01 (twenty years ago) link

That's the Gameboy Advance SP, and a beautiful thing it is.

GameBoy Advance SP

― Jordan (Jordan), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:03 (twenty years ago) link

We also have Library of Congress and George W. Bush! You can set your watch to the atomic clock in front of Cheney's house! Come visit!

See also: CICADAS

Xpost

Ooooh, I will look into that GameBoy thingy.

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:07 (twenty years ago) link

Pokemon will seriously absorb you for HOURS - get more than one version, go for Blue, Silver and Sapphire (=my chosen pokéroute) :) Lots of puzzle games will keep you going, and online Scrabble eh!

― Sarah (starry), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:09 (twenty years ago) link

will Cheney's atomic clock render me sterile?

― The Huckle-Buck (Horace Mann), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:10 (twenty years ago) link

Will Pokemon play on just any old PC laptop? Sorry, I am dumb about these things. Do I have to hook up stuff to the T.V.?

X-post

Huck, quite possibly. Are you planning to procreate???

― quincie, Tuesday, 18 May 2004 15:11 (twenty years ago) link

The Sims is definitely worth a go if you can get a laptop - I play it for hours on end. Same with SimCity4, tho you'd need a rather fast peecee to play that one properly as its a bit of a memory hog.

Best of luck with it all!

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 22:09 (twenty years ago) link

i love how everyone's 'are you sure you can't get a laptop?"

how can you live without the interweb for two whole weeks?!?!?

;)

― Ask For Samantha (thatgirl), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 22:16 (twenty years ago) link

I could deal without teh intarweb, but the games! :D Must... play... sims... argh.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 22:19 (twenty years ago) link

If you do get a laptop, see if you can't get one of these tables also. Couple people I know who have them swear by them.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 22:21 (twenty years ago) link

i've been pretty much confined to my bed in my tiny apartment for the last 12 months due to a rare viral illness. things that have kept me (relatively) sane : many books, videos, email & broadband, phone, really strong painkillers that make everything floaty, slsk, downloading 40s radio broadcasts of sherlock holmes and listening to them with a CDMP3 player (you can get 100 episodes on one cd, with the drugs i too can be Basil Rathbone!), being kept amused by all you crazy ilxors etc etc etc.
just see it as a free holiday away from your normal life, everythings on hold and will be there when you get back.

― zappi (joni), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 22:42 (twenty years ago) link

how the hell to not go absolutely shit bonkers while confined to 14 days in bed in my tiny apartment.

Masturbation.

Oh wait.

― Always Winter Never Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 22:59 (twenty years ago) link

You might wanna skip the Mad Libs at least at first; mixed with pain meds, they may cause you to laugh too hard & bust a stitch!

― Layna Andersen (Layna Andersen), Tuesday, 18 May 2004 23:45 (twenty years ago) link

Books on tape rule. There's also a narrated box set thing that takes you through the entire history of orchestral music, with full concertos and stuff in it. AUDIO TIME!

Good luck with your new set of enormous testicles, by the way.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 19 May 2004 00:37 (twenty years ago) link

The History of Classical Music
The History of Opera

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 19 May 2004 01:48 (twenty years ago) link

Visitors are U&K, don't be too proud to beg for them. Reduce your calory intake significantly -- if you avoid boredom eating, weight gain won't be a big deal.

The first four days or so, you'll be sleeping most of the time anyway.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Wednesday, 19 May 2004 07:36 (twenty years ago) link

Actually a decent laptop would be a good option, you can download all sorts of emulators and roms which saves you on shelling out for the consoles, like, AHEM DISCLAIMER but I'm sure you own consoles and games anyway so this would just be a backup like hem hem :)

― Sarah (starry), Wednesday, 19 May 2004 07:43 (twenty years ago) link

Good ideas all. And now I'm thinking that surely I can kill some time with non-stitches-disturbing masturbation experiments. Thanks AWNA!

― quincie, Wednesday, 19 May 2004 12:18 (twenty years ago) link

Books! I'm reading Disgrace by Coetzee and it's really good.. get yeself to the library pre op.

― Nellie (nellskies), Wednesday, 19 May 2004 12:33 (twenty years ago) link

three months pass...

Sigh. It was a good idea to look for this thread, as there are some good suggestions.

But, even though I've got a laptop, I won't be able to use it much, what with the wrist being out of commission. :-(

― Super-Masonic Black Hole (kate), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 09:21 (nineteen years ago) link

It responds to voice commands, you know.

― Ed (dali), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 09:27 (nineteen years ago) link

You could try typing left handed too :)

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 09:28 (nineteen years ago) link

Yeah, and end up with horrible growths all over my LEFT wrist, as well!

― Super-Masonic Black Hole (kate), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 09:29 (nineteen years ago) link

Ah, but that would prove it wasn't cancer! Also, I'm not sure that typing slowly for a few weeks is really going to lead to RSI.

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 10:09 (nineteen years ago) link

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO WASH HAIR FOR TWO WEEKS EWWWWWWWW

― quincie, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 16:03 (nineteen years ago) link

Oh, but I am quite excited that my neighbor is lending me his old-school Nintendo so I can play SUPER MARIO BROTHERS and DONKEY KONG!

― quincie, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 16:05 (nineteen years ago) link

Hope you don't hurt yourself blowing on those cartridges trying to get them to load!

― sexyDancer, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 16:12 (nineteen years ago) link

three weeks pass...

Wow, tomorrow is surgery day. I'm all set up with many of the suggestions from above, plus I'll have good ole mom coming to visit, followed by a favorite out-of-state friend. Plus great neighbors, one of whom has agreed to sneak me the occasional beer (husband is convinced I will die if I have even a tiny drink while taking painkillers, so must be done on the down-low).

Anyhow, I don't post much but I do check in frequently, so I WILL MISS YOU ILX!!! There, I've said it.

― quincie, Monday, 20 September 2004 12:33 (nineteen years ago) link

good luck for the surgery, I hope all goes well! :-)

― PinXor (Pinkpanther), Monday, 20 September 2004 12:36 (nineteen years ago) link

Good luck with the surgery! Hope it all goes as smoothly as mine did!

― The 120 Days Of Streatham (kate), Monday, 20 September 2004 12:36 (nineteen years ago) link

Good luck quincie, hope all goes well and you keep boredom at bay!

― Archel (Archel), Monday, 20 September 2004 12:51 (nineteen years ago) link

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