teach me something useful in the space of a post

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I think that since leaving full-time education, my brane has gone all stupid. Suddenly me is wanting to learn new stuff and things. Please teach me something. Anything - it could be quantum physics; appreciation of Bach; a simple cooking tip; how to say "where is the bank, I want to exchange my travellers cheques for gold" in Basque; how the fahrenheit scale works in relation to centigrade - anything at all.

RULES:
- It has to be YOU that writes it, no copying and pasting from other sources.

- It can be a long or short lesson, but please make it accessible to the layman and explain all bits of jargon.

- Must be suitable for work. No pictures preferably.

GO!

― dog latin (dog latin), Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Frenzied sharks sometimes eat themselves.

― ___ (___), Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:13 (twenty-two years ago)

TEACHHHEEEEERRR!!! TEEEEAAACHHHEEEERRR!!! :-D

― dog latin (dog latin), Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:15 (twenty-two years ago)

contrary to popular belief, there is no such thing as a brontosaurus. the apatosaurus was discovered and named by american paleontologist othniel c. marsh in 1877; when he found another skeleton two years later, he didn't realize it was the same animal and gave it a different name. appropriately, apatosaurus means "deceptive lizard."

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:27 (twenty-two years ago)

These are great! I may need to post one myself but I'll let my brain digest a few more nuggets first.

― dog latin (dog latin), Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:36 (twenty-two years ago)

you can't learn something you already know! (can you?)

― g-kit (g-kit), Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:42 (twenty-two years ago)

There is no actual moment that the universe began, because back when it was impossibly small, time and space were one and the same thing according to quantum theory.

― thing of thing, Thursday, 10 June 2004 08:51 (twenty-two years ago)

when fishing up in the water for carp, sometimes try a deeper rig as often you'll find that bigger fish lay near the boottom hoovering up the bait that has eluded the fish feeding in the top layer of the water.

― chris (chris), Thursday, 10 June 2004 09:00 (twenty-two years ago)

A duck's quack *does* echo.

― Mog, Thursday, 10 June 2004 09:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Narrowing your eyes at a cat is a gesture of appeasement and will therefore make them like and trust you more.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 10 June 2004 09:19 (twenty-two years ago)

Well since you ask... to get from celsius to fahrenheit, double the number, take off ten per cent and add thirty-two. E.g.
20 C x 2 = 40
-4 = 36
+32 = 68 F.

― beanz (beanz), Thursday, 10 June 2004 09:42 (twenty-two years ago)

Garam masala is a great spice for everything. Chuck it in stews, soups, curries, whatever - it has no heat but it boosts the taste of the blandest meal every time.

― notMarthaStewart (trayce), Thursday, 10 June 2004 09:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Dogs can't look up

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 10 June 2004 09:59 (twenty-two years ago)

(Dog-latin can't look things up ;)

― stevem (blueski), Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:00 (twenty-two years ago)

A duck's quack *does* echo.

This was SO in a pub quiz the other day and they said that it can't even though we said it could. My friend looked it up on the interweb and it confirmed that it could too. So where did they get this stupid theory from?

Beanz - thanks. I was also wondering what the Fahrenheit scale is based upon (seeing as centigrade = cooling and boiling point of water)?

― dog latin (dog latin), Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Dogs can so look up. That's a nuts theory.

― New No New Age Advanced Ambient Motor Music Almanac (Autumn Almanac), Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Almanac: Cf Shawn of the Dead.

― dog latin (dog latin), Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:37 (twenty-two years ago)

A Daddy Long-Legs is the most poisonous spider in the UK. However, it's jaws are so lame it can't widen them enough to bite you.

― Huey_, Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Fahrenheit chose 0 to be the freezing point of saltwater and 96 to be body temperature. He was inaccurate though. And he chose 96 rather than 100 because he wanted 12 x 8 divisions of the scale.

― beanz (beanz), Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:49 (twenty-two years ago)

...in the same way as miles were supposed to be a fraction of a degree of the earth's peripheral.

Ooh I have one - nettles irritate because they actually secrete an irritant akin to a form of GLASS.

― dog latin (dog latin), Thursday, 10 June 2004 10:58 (twenty-two years ago)

Once over the top, and then three times under, followed by a loop around the back. Now take the other end and twist it around twice and feed it through the loop. Done!

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:02 (twenty-two years ago)

You weigh approximately 10 pounds lighter directly over the equator.

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:05 (twenty-two years ago)

When hunting for seals that are on the ice (as opposed to in the sea) polar bears cover their noses because even a seal can spot a black dot getting bigger as it comes towards it.

― Jonnie, Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:12 (twenty-two years ago)

The word 'tory' actually comes from the old Irish word 'toraidhe', which was a type of fighter or warrior. Tories took to the hills and fought a not-very-successful guerilla campaign against the Cromwellian regime, and gradually the word was used to describe any political group that held out in the face of overwhelming change.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Accentmonkey, I have for many years believed that 'toraidhe' means 'robber' or 'thief', and that it was applied to the tories after one particular bout of taxation and stuck.

But I suppose you'd know better than I.

― Tim (Tim), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:18 (twenty-two years ago)

Jochen Rindt was formula 1's only posthumous world champion, in 1970.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:26 (twenty-two years ago)

One scale for measurement of temperatures whose popularity has diminished steeply during the last decades is the Réaumur scale. The Réaumur scale shares its zero with the Celsius (centigrade) scale, but the boiling point of water is 80 degrees Réaumur. Although mostly forgotten today, it was given as one of "the three most frequently used scales for temperature" in a Norwegian quiz book from 1940. Today, the honour of appearing alongside the Celsius and Fahrenheit scales in the answer to such a question would undoubtedly go to the Kelvin scale, which is mainly used in the context of physical and chemical science.

― OleM (OleM), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Although interesting, I don't know if any of these posts are particularly "useful".

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Unless we are all professional pub-quizzers!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:37 (twenty-two years ago)

http://cache.eonline.com/News/Photos/c/cheers.claven.050599.jpg
Ehh, funny thing about the phrase "odds and ends" there, Doggy.. The phrase is actually "odd ends" and it uh, refers to the end of a bolt of fabric. The remnant table, if you will.

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:40 (twenty-two years ago)

The knot tying thing is useful!

In Go, always extend first after a crosscut.

― Gregory Henry (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:43 (twenty-two years ago)

grains of rice in your hook boxes will absorb moisture and prevent your hooks from getting rusty

― chris (chris), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:45 (twenty-two years ago)

To make your toilet paper sheets line up at the perforation, turn the topmost sheet over once.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:46 (twenty-two years ago)

The greasers cannot afford rings, cars, or other physical trappings of power that the Socs enjoy. Consequently, they must resort to more affordable markers of identity. By wearing their hair in a specific style, greasers distinguish themselves from other social groups. Conservative cultural values of the 1960s called for men to keep their hair short, and the greaser style is a clear transgression of this social convention. It is not only distinctive, but, as a physical characteristic, this hair is truly an organic part of the greaser persona.

― Chris 'The Velvet Bingo' V (Chris V), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Water does not swirl down plugholes/toilets clockwise in the northern hemisphere and anticlockwise in the southern hemisphere.

The coriolis force is not strong enough to impart control on such a small mass of water

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:48 (twenty-two years ago)

ooooh G to thread

― chris (chris), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

**This was SO in a pub quiz the other day and they said that it can't even though we said it could. **

I had this in a pub quiz recently too! Which pub quiz was yours? Perhaps it's simply an urban myth put about by pub quizmasters to make sure nobody gets maximum points.

― Mog, Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

81% of websites do not meet the first level (A) of the Web Access Initiative's accessibility criteria.

― Archel (Archel), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

The knot tying thing is useful!
Actually, so was the thing about fishing for Carp. Most others are just wacky facts and figures, so I'll include my own:

The highest point in the province of Saskatchewan is the Cypress Hills, at an elevation of 1392 metres. Insane! In the membrane!

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:51 (twenty-two years ago)

I've argued this before. It seems those who haven't experienced it first hand believe it to be a myth. If you empty water a foot either side of the equator, it will disappear in opposite directions. Directly over the line, no swirling.

― Mikey G (Mikey G), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, the Archel post reminded me:

When you're about to sneeze, if you decide you'd prefer to feel kinda robbed and dirty inside, you can press your top lip with your finger and it goes away.

― Gregory Henry (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:54 (twenty-two years ago)

The knot tying thing is useful!

I'm glad it was - however, I just made that knot up - so please don't use it in a life-critical situation. (That's an even more useful fact.)

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Oooh! Smiling also helps calm the gagging reflex. I learned that on CSI once... So if you're looking at a smelly, dead body.. SMILE!!

― dave225 (Dave225), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Mickey G - they did this on Blue Peter once.

― ___ (___), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Hmm, useful, that's tricky. If you get bitten by a snake or spider, don't try to cut or suck out the venom.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Some characters used in the Nordic languages, often regarded by foreigners as accented or ligatured versions of other letters, are actually separate letters with their proper place in the alphabet:

Norwegian and Danish alphabet:
ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZÆØÅ

Swedish alphabet:
ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZÅÄÖ

Icelandic alphabet:
AÁBCDÐEÉFGHIÍJKLMNOÓPQRSTUÚVWXYÝZÞÆÖ

Sometimes, however, letters originally not used in words of the language are also not regarded as part of the alphabet -- for instance, W is apparently sometimes not counted in the Danish alphabet, while the same goes for C, Q and W in the Icelandic one. Z was an integral part of Icelandic orthography (e.g. íslenzk = Icelandic) until a few decades ago, when it was replaced by S.

― OleM (OleM), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:58 (twenty-two years ago)

when walking across an icy pathway, always heel and toe, heel and toe

― chris (chris), Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

When lumberjacks are cutting trees down in Clerkenwell do not go outside for a fag because you'll get sawdust in your eyes.

― Jonnie, Thursday, 10 June 2004 11:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Dave, do you you know any decent real ones? I'd like to know!

― Gregory Henry (Gregory Henry), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't waste white wine on red wine spills - at best you'll just dilute and spread the stain, at worst you're losing nice booze.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 10 June 2004 12:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 153 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

A cat can survive a fall from any height, since its terminal velocity is half that of humans. Exceptions occur around the seven-storey mark, because up to this point the cat tenses up while falling, making it less likely that it will survive. Above seven storeys, the cat relaxes.

There's a Straight Dope column about this if anyone cares to search for it, but as I remember, the likelihood of a cat's survival decrease exponentially for each floor higher you drop them from, UNTIL you hit a certain height (might be 7th floor, don't remember), and then the chances of survival start to increase. They're not sure exactly why this is, but the theories include the above-mentioned relaxation of the body before impact, and the more interesting idea that with enough time, a cat can spread itself out and build up some small amount of wind resistance (like a flying (gliding) squirrel) which slows down its rate of descent. I'm assuming that this only holds true up to a certain height, and that if you dropped a cat from the 30th floor or whatever, it wouldn't comically come to a halt in midair just before hitting the ground.

― St. Nicholas (Nick A.), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:25 (twenty-one years ago)

10% of human beings who have ever existed are still alive today.

??!?!?

― ken c (ken c), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:27 (twenty-one years ago)

the daddy long legs spiders in your place are females, the males die after sex. heh

― donna (donna), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Do not feed Mogwais after midnight.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:30 (twenty-one years ago)

The word 'sequoia' contains all the vowels.

― mcd (mcd), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:34 (twenty-one years ago)

The way it works is 20 people can form 190 potential different pairs - since you're not specifying any individual date, all you need is for one of those to be a match. The probability of a match by date, therefore, is 365/190=1.921. The probability of there not being a match is 365/(365-190)=2.086. So more likely than not.

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Um... how exactly did they gather all this cat-falling data? Can I be part of the scientific team working on this important theory?

― Rob Bolton (Rob Bolton), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 13:58 (twenty-one years ago)

OK, here is the Straight Dope column on falling cats. The data was collected from New York vets.

― St. Nicholas (Nick A.), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 14:08 (twenty-one years ago)

(The word 'sequoia' contains all the vowels. - don't think so! :-)

'nother language lesson:
in the 'stonian tongue, words are pronounced like they're written

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 15:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Tiit, you've missed some letters there.

― Markelby (Mark C), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 15:52 (twenty-one years ago)

WHA?
'postrophe rules, dude!

― t\'\'t (t\'\'t), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Kurt Cobain strung his guitars with piano wire, hence the distinct thick tone.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Uh, no.

― St. Nicholas (Nick A.), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

NUH HUH JURK

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 16:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, Kurt Cobain claimed to string his guitars with piano wire.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 16:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Standard mandolin tuning = G D A E.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 16:02 (twenty-one years ago)

If you're switching to mandolin from guitar and having trouble getting chord fingering correct, sometimes it helps to think of it as the lowest four strings on the guitar, reversed.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

who dropped all those cats? the vets? or did they just question the droppers after the event?
who drops cats from 7 stories up anyway?

― donna (donna), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 16:05 (twenty-one years ago)

If you ever get an ice cream headache, put your tongue up against the roof of your mouth. Your headache will disappear quickly.

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 16:23 (twenty-one years ago)

One of George III's nicknames (apart from Krazy Kraut and Your Insanity) was 'Farmer George', due to his interest in agricultural improvements. Curiously George is derived from the Greek name Georgios which was derived from the Greek word georgos meaning "farmer, earthworker", so they could have just stuttered 'Farmer Farmer' or 'George George'.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

The fax machine was invented in 1842. The telephone wasn't invented until 1876.

― aldo_cowpat (aldo_cowpat), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Europe didn't have horses until Columbus brought them from America.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:14 (twenty-one years ago)

Were there no horses in Asia anywhere? That seems odd.

Wasn't it the same for tomatoes, too? Weren't they brought over to Europe from the Americas?

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Potatos, too, I think. And vice versa for cows?

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh dear, I was only responding to Aldo Cowpat's obvious joke with another joke, I didn't think anyone would take it seriously.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:24 (twenty-one years ago)

what joke?

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:28 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, unless he's talking about the telegraph, I don't think he's telling the truth.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:29 (twenty-one years ago)

I think he's right about the fax thing. I believe there was a way to use the telegraph to transmit docs.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, a little googleresearching yields a few confirmed produce items that weren't available in Europe pre-popular-discovery of Americas - tomatoes, potatoes, corn.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Facsimile transmission over wires or faxing was invented by Alexander Bain, a Scottish mechanic who in 1843 received a British patent for “improvements in producing and regulating electric currents and improvements in timepieces and in electric printing and signal telegraphs.” Seven years earlier, Samuel Morse invented the telegraph and the fax machine evolved from the telegraph technology.

http://inventors.about.com/library/inventors/blfax.htm

― oops (Oops), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:39 (twenty-one years ago)

a common ukelele tuning is GCEA. So if you put a capo on the 5th fret of your guitar and ignore the low E and A string you can practice uke chords on guitar and double uke parts with guitar on recordings. Sounds good.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

My uke is tuned like a mandolin (G D A E)! I hope that's not bad for the strings.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Last Words:

Oscar Wilde

"Either that wallpaper goes, or I go."

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

They don't have the traditional W in France?

It is considered an exotic consonant though obviously the Walloons use it. Wenger might be an Alsatian or immigrant name. Many germanic and norse words or names that begin with W in English begin with GU in French, i.e. William/Guillaume, War/Guerre, or Wicket/Guichet.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

xª + yª = zª has no non-zero integer solutions for x, y and z when a > 2

I have discovered a truly remarkable proof which this dialogue box is too small to contain...

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:57 (twenty-one years ago)

The Last Words of Dutch Schultz

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 18:59 (twenty-one years ago)

OH I LOVE THE LAST WORDS OF DUTCH SCHULTZ! William Burroughs did too, apparently.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 19:01 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah Burroughs is the reason I thought of that.

More last words:
"I have just had 18 whiskeys in a row. I do believe that is a record" - Dylan Thomas

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 19:03 (twenty-one years ago)

From that Straight Dope link: "I got another note telling about some moron who dropped (a) a cat and (b) a chicken out of a Cessna at 800 feet to see what would happen. The cat survived. The chicken didn't."

― The Dreaded Rear Admiral (Leee), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 21:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I read that and secretly hoped they went down together and the reason the cat lived is cause he spent the entire descent riding the chicken's ass.

― Michael White (Hereward), Tuesday, 3 August 2004 21:57 (twenty-one years ago)

four months pass...

More of this kind of thing plz!

― dog latin (dog latin), Friday, 24 December 2004 10:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Horses can die of indigestion (thanks to CSI for this snippet).

The thought of a cat chasing a chicken manically for the few seconds-worth of drop tickles my fanny.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:04 (twenty-one years ago)

You should never eat a polar bear's liver due to possible vitamin A overdose.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Male mosquitoes do not bite.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Ooh, I can follow Onimo's penultimate one. The discovery of a new species of human, homo floriensis, which lived up to (and possibly beyond) 13,000 years ago, was made when the skeleton of a woman was discovered on the Indonesian island of Flores. The woman's bones showed growths and deformities caused by eating the livers of carnivores and thereby causing hypervitaminosis A.

However, the length of time the woman lived with the condition proved that her society cared for its frail and sick, which (I think) is tyhe first evidence of such social behaviour.

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:31 (twenty-one years ago)

"Stewardesses" is the longest word that is typed with only the left hand on a qwerty keyboard.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:42 (twenty-one years ago)

"Hypervitaminosis" sounds much better than "Vitamin A overdose"

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:44 (twenty-one years ago)

but less specific

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:47 (twenty-one years ago)

unless you put the A in the end

― ken c (ken c), Friday, 24 December 2004 11:48 (twenty-one years ago)

You can't push a rope.

― aimurchie, Friday, 24 December 2004 12:06 (twenty-one years ago)

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