Intelligent Animals

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Did anyone see that story about the Border Collie who could remember 300 words? I know it's widely accepted that they are most intelligent species of dog unlike the bulldog who takes 8 hours to finally twig that their owner has left the house. So, who truly is the most intelligent of the animal kingdom & are they or could they ever be, more intelligent than us mere humans?

― littlerock, Thursday, 24 June 2004 11:55 (twenty-one years ago)

I know at LEAST 300 words, big fuckin deal

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Thursday, 24 June 2004 11:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Species of dog?

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Thursday, 24 June 2004 11:58 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.enuffznuff.com/albums/animals.jpg

Or not.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 24 June 2004 11:59 (twenty-one years ago)

The pig?

― Ste (Fuzzy), Thursday, 24 June 2004 11:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Retriever

― Andrew Blood Thames (Andrew Thames), Thursday, 24 June 2004 11:59 (twenty-one years ago)

we had a cat that figured out if you piss on the element of the stove your piss smell gets all over the house when someone turns the stove on

― duane, Thursday, 24 June 2004 12:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Our cat used to piss down sewer grids. Unfortunately sometimes due to the inneffectiveness of the aiming procedure there would be piss all over the grid cover, but at least he meant well.

― Ste (Fuzzy), Thursday, 24 June 2004 12:13 (twenty-one years ago)

who knows about intelligent mutant sniffer bees?

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 12:23 (twenty-one years ago)

intelligent mutant sniffer bees would be hypersensitive to cat piss and would sting cats that pissed on ovens repeastedly on the nose and SERVE THEM RIGHT!

― MarkH (MarkH), Thursday, 24 June 2004 12:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Besides the obvious ones that always get cited like dolphins and chimps, we mustn't forget the octopus.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 24 June 2004 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

I saw a documentary. they train bees to sniff out explosives, in airports. intelligent mutant sniffer bees.

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I hate America:

The development, training, veterinary care, and research facility that supports today's Navy Marine Mammal Program is centered in the Biosciences Division of the Space and Naval Warfare Systems Center San Diego (SSC San Diego). However, the Navy's work with marine mammals has been going on for many years. It got its start in the late 1950s when the Navy began to study the unique attributes of marine mammals such as the hydrodynamics of the dolphin. By understanding how dolphins move in the water, perhaps the Navy could improve torpedo, ship, and submarine designs. Soon the Navy realized that dolphins would be valuable assistants to Navy divers working in the open ocean. Unlike human divers, dolphins are capable of making repeated deep dives without experiencing the bends or decompression sickness. They also found that dolphins and sea lions are highly reliable, adaptable, and trainable marine animals that could be conditioned to search for, detect, and mark the location of objects in the water.

In the early days of the program, various marine mammal species were considered including: killer whales, pilot whales, belugas (white whales), Steller sea lions, grey seals, and fur seals. Other animals were used in various studies pertaining to locating personnel from downed aircraft and creating effective shark deterrents to protect them until they could be rescued. As the animals were assessed for their capabilities, much about their basic biology was learned.

Today, bottlenose dolphins and California sea lions perform a number of important functions such as protecting ports and Navy assets from swimmer attack, locating and attaching recovery hardware to expensive exercise and training targets, and locating potentially dangerous sea mines.

"Five young dolphins lining up to work"

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 17:28 (twenty-one years ago)

poor bees.

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 17:39 (twenty-one years ago)

that's it I'm moving to Neptune.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 17:42 (twenty-one years ago)

It could be possible to uplift animals (to be our equals?), inserting a genetic sequence to increase their intelligence.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

do you work for the Navy too?

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Yep, I really am posting this for the third time today:

http://www.sit.wisc.edu/~amgreene/newpics/beepercomic.jpg

― Jordan (Jordan), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:37 (twenty-one years ago)

I think the Navy would want to make no mind zombies rather than risk unleashing pinko commie octopi & cie into this slow old world.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:37 (twenty-one years ago)

oh right, because Communism is obviously a form of higher intelligence, sure.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:44 (twenty-one years ago)

what?

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:45 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't know about intelligent, but this guy wins in the cuteness stakes:
http://www.frenchbulldogclub.org/FBQuiz/FBquizDog4.gif

― lauren (laurenp), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:47 (twenty-one years ago)

Sebastien are you impervious to facetiousness?

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:48 (twenty-one years ago)

lauren you are a TREAAAAAT!

― People love Gravity and Ebullition! (ex machina), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:49 (twenty-one years ago)

stence, nowadays I prefer a "constructive" good humor, not one that implies a certain antagonism/violence but maybe it's just because I want to talk about how I'm a righteous market abolitionist.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

About nonverbal thoughts, I don't think they can be the exclusive territory of animals and babies. I was wondering if anyone knowing about zen would agree with this, esp when it comes at "zen in motion".

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 19:05 (twenty-one years ago)

what about facetiousness implies antagonism/violence, in your view? Also, statements like this:

"It could be possible to uplift animals (to be our equals?), inserting a genetic sequence to increase their intelligence."

make me wonder if you actually think that's a good thing.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't really understand your connection between zen & talking about nonverbal thoughts moving beyond the realm of animals & babies. could you clarify?
xpost

― kelsey (kelstarry), Thursday, 24 June 2004 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

what about facetiousness implies antagonism/violence, in your view?
Conversation is always dirty*, of social interests, to look good, to please, to dominate. There's always many factors at play . About that post of yours, I was referring to one of these aspects, political, the permanent "culture wars" that goes on in conversations more or less consciously (looking for a word, anyone knows if neurology or cog sci have proven with science the hypothesis of the subconscious?), that's why I mentionned that "market abolitionist" thing you know, proposing a revolutionary style of everyday joking around etc. I could go on with a leftist nietzschean reading of aristoteles tractatus coislinianus but you know what I'm sayin'?

* dirty as in funky or something: it's a good thing.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:29 (twenty-one years ago)

no, I don't know what you're saying.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:30 (twenty-one years ago)

Can't you see the antagonism in your postings upthread?

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:39 (twenty-one years ago)

nope, not really. Antagonism from me would be much more brutal. And you still haven't explained if you think modifying the intelligence of animals is a good idea (altho I'm not sure that it's intelligence that would be modified as much as attributes).

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

One thing at a time. ("and you still haven't explained" = kind of brute thing to say, no?)

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

what do you make of the bees, sébastien?

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:46 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost - no less brutish than saying animals should have their intelligence increased. Probably less so, even.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:47 (twenty-one years ago)

"should"

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't know about intelligent, but this guy wins in the cuteness stakes:

-- lauren (warmleatherett...), June 24th, 2004.

Actually that puppy does look kind of look like an adorable little brain with legs and a tail. It's the wrinkles, I think.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:52 (twenty-one years ago)

"should"
-- Sébastien Chikara

that's what I'm asking you to clarify. Innovation for innovation's sake doesn't seem to me to be very ethical.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 20:55 (twenty-one years ago)

No need to know loads about psychology/sociology to know the meaning is not only to be found in the choice of words but also in the way they are said. You didn't just ask for a clarification, you push an unethical position on me: you are brutish.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:03 (twenty-one years ago)

are you Colin Meeder?

Seriously, though, if you write ambiguously, you can't complain about people misunderstanding your words.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:05 (twenty-one years ago)

waaah wah wah.

let's get back to the happy mammals!

http://www.mb.jhu.edu/connor/media/dolphins.gif

― andrew l. r. (allocryptic), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Sloths are the most intelligent animals. "Simplify, Simplify", after all.

― Kevin Gilchrist (Mr Fusion), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

andrew do you work for the Navy too?

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:10 (twenty-one years ago)

totally.

http://www.veiled-chameleon.com/photos/sealion.jpg

SWIM FOR ME MY DARLINGS!

― andrew l. r. (allocryptic), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

about Bees to 'sniff out' explosives:

Flowers fuk'd bees like that (and vice versa), on an evolutionary time scale even, but contrary to this example the sniffin bee project's relevance will be a flash in the pan; more performant electronic gadgets are probably being invented just now. The only arguments I can think of against this would be those of the vegans but I don't see a need to go there.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 21:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I just killed a big wolf spider.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:09 (twenty-one years ago)

spiders eat bees.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:18 (twenty-one years ago)

fuck bees.

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:19 (twenty-one years ago)

slowly but surely the wolf spider gene pool learn to give proper regards to dr foot.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:19 (twenty-one years ago)

cozen in the article you linked to there was no mention of mutations they just trick them with sugar water.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:24 (twenty-one years ago)

mutated bee sociology?

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:26 (twenty-one years ago)

why not, "apiculture" also does it.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:31 (twenty-one years ago)

mmmm "terrorist honey"

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:34 (twenty-one years ago)

honey is commonly used to smuggle drugs.

― hstencil (hstencil), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:58 (twenty-one years ago)

inside bees!

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 22:59 (twenty-one years ago)

the bastards.

― cozen (Cozen), Thursday, 24 June 2004 23:00 (twenty-one years ago)

NEWSFLASH: Sébastien Chikara missing from Thomas Pynchon's new novel: Excelsior and Ennui, a study in the Sasseurian slippages of octopi and incomprehensability in a virtual watering hole...

― Associated Press, Friday, 25 June 2004 00:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Increasing the intelligence of some animals is a ok to me if it could be done right, it could be see like breeding dogs. Some people might call breeding dogs animal cruelty, I do not. It could be fun to have a dog that could speak with me with a portable computer and speech synthesizer like prof Hawking's.

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Friday, 25 June 2004 00:15 (twenty-one years ago)

buy one of those Japanese robot ones, they're already here and they're cheaper.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 25 June 2004 05:50 (twenty-one years ago)

buy one of those Japanese robot ones, they're already here and they're cheaper.

ps. mutts are smarter than purebreeds and generally have less in the way of birth defects.

― hstencil (hstencil), Friday, 25 June 2004 05:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Just like one shouldn't discriminate against people adopting a child of any specific ethnic background, there shouldn't be discrimination against people adopting any sentient beings (bio,AI,etc).

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Friday, 25 June 2004 06:59 (twenty-one years ago)

ps. mutts are smarter than purebreeds and generally have less in the way of birth defects.

The superficial traits don't need to handicap the species well-being, this shoud be fixed by throwing out the racist pedigrees, breeding to focus on rectifying these maladaptations, ending inbreeding of course but also using genetic engineering, or not.
Of course an uplifted organism raised to maturity becomes master of it's own destity, could decide to continue uplifts, or not. SPACE DOG DON'T KILL ME!

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Friday, 25 June 2004 18:54 (twenty-one years ago)

The claim and arguments of my last post seems clear enough to me but I wonder if it's understandable for most people?

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 1 July 2004 01:15 (twenty-one years ago)

scratch "understandable", I meant comprehensible

― Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 1 July 2004 01:18 (twenty-one years ago)

mutts are still the result of breeding.

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 1 July 2004 09:15 (twenty-one years ago)

indirectly

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 1 July 2004 09:15 (twenty-one years ago)

I dislike this term "Intelligent Animals" because it implies that other kinds of Animals are stupid. Plus, the press came up with the name, omg what a stupid name.

― Picard Maneuver (Leee), Thursday, 1 July 2004 19:47 (twenty-one years ago)

and what do stupid animals talk about?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 1 July 2004 20:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Getting high and having fun!

― Picard Maneuver (Leee), Thursday, 1 July 2004 20:16 (twenty-one years ago)

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