Stressed,Confused,Lonely

Me and my current girlfriend both started off as a rebound relationship. She had just split up with her ex and vice versa. For the first 3-4 months we both did not show any connection other then intimatcy. Probably as a means of comfort or to get over our ex's. So in that time frame she didnt show much love or admiration towards me in them first months. I turned to talking to other women online and still remaining friends with my ex's. As a result that summer she found out all of this and was furious and stated I cheated on her. I felt very bad and didnt see it as cheating but in a way it is if you hide things from your love one. She still had feelings in them first few months for her ex and told me so truthfully. She stated that she might still love him. As time went on my cheating part stayed subcluded and things were getting better for us. About 6 months ago she started talking to her ex again online, the one that she was with last before me. I was furious cause I knew all too well that she still had feelings for him. I sat there and watched her type to him, tell him she loved him etc.. I love her more then ever in these last 6 months. Its made me realize what I can lose. We remained intimate the whole time and her ex wasnt aware of any of it. She states that shes in love with two men. The ex and me. Now she is gone to see this ex and stated she would email me with her decision while she was there for 2 weeks with him. Its been over a week and I havent heard a thing from her. Do I take that as shes confused and still doenst know what to descide? Or do I take it as she doenst want to hurt me and will tell me when she gets back home? Ive made her the pivitol point of my life. Something none of us should do but I cant help it. Ive never felt a love like this and dont want to let it slip away.